“Always.” His eyes narrow at me while his palm covers my lower stomach. “Are you in pain, baby?”
I wrap my hands around his neck, emotions gathering inside me. “No. I’m used to it. There’re months with less or more pain.”
A phone rings, with a distinct ringtone, it must belong to Damien. He picks it up, and a genuine smile spreads across his face. Jealousy fires up my core. Who got that reaction out of him? I swallow my hurt and try to shove the ugly emotions back. He greets her, and pain spears my heart. It’s a name I’d never forget. She has been a constant companion to Damien. Every other one came and went, but Chloe, she’s another story. He was different with her. My emotions demand its price in pain as my ears pique at their conversation.
“Hello, darling.”
His forehead creases with a worry line. “You sound off . . . is everything all right?”
“You know better than to ask.” Relief surges through him, and he chuckles as he sits.
“Guess what, I kind of miss you.” Her sweet voice echoes from the phone.
“I miss you, too. It’s been too long.”
My heart tears, and I fist the sheets. He twirls a strand of my hair, as I urge calmness to find me.
“I’m in London, let’s meet.”
“I’m in Zürich. Don’t tell me you had enough of the big world. I told you it’s not for you.”
“It was worth trying, though.”
“Whatever we run from is a boomerang, Chloe.”
“Yes, but I’m all for making my own experiences.”
“Come visit me.”
I wave the calmness goodbye, pull my hair into a messy bun as he narrows his eyes at me, and I force a smile.
“If you so kindly invite me, it’s hard to say no to you.”
My mind spins with jealousy at their laughter and their easy-going way. Maybe this is what he felt like when I told him Alex is a part of my life. But the major difference is he’s my family. Plus, we never had something going on. I try to remain unperturbed, but my body goes rigid. I rise to my feet, offer him my most fake smile possible, and leave the room with my dignity still intact.
It feels too intimate, too personal, to keep overhearing their conversation. I trudge to the kitchen, pour myself a cup of coffee, slide the doors to the terrace open, and enjoy the view over Zürich from above. The noises of the city lure me into revelry as I caress my battered heart.
DAMIEN
This infuriating and maddening woman. Of course, she would flee the second something displeases her. Assumptions before facts. Does she actually believe I buy into her fake smile and indifferent posture? I thread my fingers through my hair and continue my conversation with my best friend.
“I’ll introduce you to someone when you come.”
She squeals, and I yank my phone from my ear. “Is this you saying you finally found someone?”
“I’m in love,” I confess, and she gasps, surely remembering my fucked-up situation.
“You already have a fake fiancée . . . do you need more complications?”
“Chloe . . .”
“Fine, then maybe you want to hear something like . . . Great news. How I waited for this moment.
Tell me all about it.”
“I’ll ignore your sarcasm and pretend it is, in fact, a caring question. It’s the same person.”
“What do you mean?”
“It’s Bria.”
Her silence speaks of a thousand disagreements. “Come on, Damien. What’s wrong with you? Do I have to remind you she almost destroyed you the first time? You came back in a disturbed state almost failing all your courses and ruining your future. All the shit you did that year.”
“It’s not like that,” I try to reason with her and drag a hand down my face.
“I was at your side the entire time, worrying for a long time. Really?” she questions, and my voice lowers to annoyance.
“This has nothing to do with you. I believed a lie, a fucked-up lie. She didn’t cheat. Someone drugged her.”
Her palm slaps on her mouth, and she gasps, “Who does something like this?”
“Monica.”
“Your joke of a wife-to-be?” she screams, piercing my ears, and shoots, “I warned you something was wrong with her. But no, Mr. I Know Better, you had to have your revenge. Here I thought my family ties were abnormal. So, you and Bria?”
“I’m aware what you had to go through because of me, but I love her. She’s so deeply engraved in me, I can’t stop it. I don’t want to either. I’m sure there’re no normal families, anyway.”
“Congratulations, you’ve rendered me speechless.”
A chuckle escapes me, and I say, trying to loosen the conversation, “It was all worth it then. I have to go. I’ll see you next week.”
“Hey, this isn’t fair. You can’t leave me hanging like this.” She should’ve gone into acting!
“You’ll overcome it . . . I’m sure.”
“Damien . . .”
“Take care.”
I hang up and stride to find the only woman who has my heart in her hands. She doesn’t make it easy for me as I search every room before I spot a light golden head on the balcony. From the window, I stop and drink her in. She has her back to me, unaware how she steals my heartbeats away every damn time. Bria looks angelic with her face tilted toward the twilight sky, clasping that cup of coffee like a life raft in her hand. The baby hairs on her neck stand up as I approach and drop next to her on the lounge. Although aware of my movements, she keeps her eyes closed just to spite me, I’m sure.
“So damn stubborn,” I mumble to myself, but I still love her like crazy. It’s good to know I’m not the only jealous one in the room for once. “Hi, baby, why did you leave me there by myself?”
She stiffens. Caution isn’t my middle name for sure, and she hisses under her breath, “I left you in quite good company, giving you the privacy you needed.”
First strike. One-zero for Bria.
“I have nothing to hide. Next week, I want you two to meet.”
She sets the cup on the table, faces me, and her hands grip the railing. “I don’t think it’s appropriate.”
If venom were a sentence, it would definitely be that one. I lean into the lounge, and place one leg over the other, my eyes narrowing at her. “Why, love, do you assume it’s inappropriate?”
“Might I presume you will stay at your place next week?”
“No, you presume wrong. I’ll be staying where I want, and that’s where you are.” Her upper chest lowers, and I peek at her breasts.
“It’s not very hospitable of you.”
I rub my temples and grumble, “I swear you behave like a stubborn little monster.”
Her eyes burn with anger. I love how fierce she can be.
“She’s my best friend, Bria, the only true one I have. It would mean a lot if the love of my life could do me this favor and meet a person who means a lot to me.”
“At this point, you should define which one is what?”
My jaw drops, her insults making my insides throb. “Are you being difficult on purpose?”
She avoids my gaze. Will I ever get her trust back? I question and shove back my hurt.
I interlace our fingers. “It hurts and insults me when you say things like what you said when you’re doing it on purpose. You’re the love of my life, always have been.” I would rip my heart out and offer it to her so she could see the imprint of her on every inch of me.
She slides down my lap, my sweet Bria surfacing from behind the mountain of her doubts, and asks, “How is she?”
“Chloe is awesome, fierce, intelligent, and put up with me the entire time.” My lips quirk up thinking of her. “This year she took a world tour because she said if not now, when will it ever be the right moment? She is a dreamer, but she would never admit it.”
Bria locks her hands over my neck, and interest transforms her face. “How did you meet?”
“Funny story. I bum
ped right into her in the university halls while chatting with you. I apologized, and she asked, ‘How do you do it?’”
“What?”
“You’re the best in all our classes, but you’re constantly on that phone.”
“It’s what I know, being with my girlfriend and having my priorities straight,” I countered, and her eyes sparked up.
“That’s sweet. You should keep her then.”
“Oh, I will,” I added.
But it wasn’t until I returned, wrecked, that we became friends. Chloe’s your age, but she finished high school sooner, and we had some classes together.”
“She seems pretty special, not to forget, beautiful.”
I nod, and Bria chews on her bottom lip. “Good, now I’m all reassured.” Sarcasm drips from her lips, and I tip her head to me.
“Hey, baby, where’s my self-confident and bad-ass Bria?”
“I’ll search for her.” She looks around, and I chuckle. She’s hilarious.
“I love you. Only you rule over my heart.”
Her sinful lips curve into a smile. She picks at something invisible from under her and says, “Here she is. Keep talking.”
DAMIEN
Bria ambles to my office looking like a vision of perfection as I’m on the phone with Monica. With her near me, my composure doesn’t falter.
“My parents are holding a gathering tomorrow, be punctual.”
“Aren’t you picking me up?” Her honey-dripping voice turns my stomach.
“No.”
“But, Damien, my plane lands late,” she whines.
“I don’t care, be there like we discussed.”
“What’s all the secrecy about?”
Worry laces her words as I force myself to remain calm. “You’ll find out soon enough.”
“Okay, see you tomorrow then.”
I hang up proud of myself for remaining in control. Tomorrow, though, will be a new challenge. I gather Bria in my arms, her sweet smell nurturing my heart, and my lips seal on hers.
She exits my office leaving behind a trail of my scent.
My insides roar with satisfaction, a part in me desperate to claim her repeatedly satiated for the moment. She’s mine, and everyone can smell it on her. I’m a caveman in a suit, and it doesn’t even bother me.
Late in the night, I stroke her belly. She moans, loving it when I caress her like this, and her pleased noises are some sort of aphrodisiac for me. It has as much beauty holding her to my chest as fucking her relentlessly. Both satisfy different sides in me. She turns in my arms, her eyes sparkling, and my chests twitches.
“I have a surprise for you tomorrow when we come back.”
I pin her to her back, and nibble on her hot skin and say, “If it involves you naked and surrendering to my pleasure, it’ll be the best surprise possible.” She draws her lower lip through her perfect white teeth and arches a brow.
“Maybe.”
The need to bury myself in her, to love her, and make her mine own me. I waggle my eyebrows at her. “This night can’t end soon enough, then.”
Her giggles erupt, granting me the most amazingly sound in the world. My heart skips a beat every time she laughs this way—carefree and happy. I love to be the one who puts a smile on her face after being the reason it was gone for so long.
Will my guilt ever diminish?
This with her right now, I could get drunk on this euphoria. Making her laugh for the rest of our lives is my number one priority.
***
As I drive to my parents’ mansion, my sports car vibrates under me while I plan out ways to bring Bria back home and lose myself in her. One bearable aspect of my sister dating Alexander is he’s more gone than at home. But them being together still angers me. When did she grow up so fast? Right under my nose when I was too busy pitying my sorry ass.
Compared to the last time our parents saw us, this time, it comes as the most normal thing in the world for them to witness us back together. I squeeze her hand in support as Bria seeks Filip, who greets us with his absence, but knowing him, he’ll come to his senses when he’s ready. One thing about Filip, he’ll never let someone down, especially not his own sister.
When Monica shows up—the image of my ruin—everyone freezes.
I find it appropriate for her choice of black clothes. It suits her well. Her looking at me full of glee ends when Katherine slaps her, her head spins.
“How could you? I raised you like my daughter,” Katherine shouts, pain infused in every word, while Monica narrows her eyes at her, dumbfounded, and caresses her cheek.
“Aunt, what’s wrong with you?” she asks, not aware her dirty secret was exposed, instead considering it must be some misunderstanding.
“Have you any idea what your selfishness caused, Monica? Your mother would be so disappointed in you.”
Realization dawns on her, and her posture turns to the offensive. She glances at me, perhaps expecting help, and my jaw sets. She must be a lunatic if she believes I’ll take her side.
“Why, Monica?”
She thrusts her head high, defiance transforming her face. Anger boils inside me witnessing her reaction. Her eyes find Bria, and her devilish smirk reveals more than she could’ve ever said. She’s not only a horrible person, but she’s also insane. My insides tremble thinking of all these years I took care of her instead of putting her into a psychiatric ward.
I snap my fingers at her and snarl, “Don’t you dare look at her. You won’t be that near to Bria ever again.”
She tilts her head, and puts a palm on her waist, amusement crossing her face. “But why, dear intended, she’s my cousin.”
George growls her name, and she has the decency to twitch.
“Monica, we aren’t engaged. We were never engaged. It was a stupid act on my part, enacting revenge on the wrong person.”
She waves her hand to my face and says, “The ring on my finger disagrees.”
I gesture to it, and snarl, “Keep it as a reminder. It’ll be the only thing you have left. You’re fired. All your funds are cut off as we speak. You’ll stay away from us if you know what’s good for you.” My voice lowers to threatening, and I say, “You have seen how persuasive and meticulous I am when I want something.”
Just one shiver rocks her. Afterward, she mocks me by throwing her head back, laughing. Everyone stares at each other in complete disbelief. She picks at her ring and says, “You might’ve forgotten something. Our wedding is in three months, and you’ll be present as you didn’t give yourself another choice.”
My heart constricts, my jaw drops. Her words slam into me, and I remember the fucking contract. My head reels as I drag in air to fill my lungs. Panic entraps me as I seek Bria, who narrows her eyes in question at me.
Everyone stares at me to contradict her, but I can’t. How did I forget this? Have I been so engrossed in Bria my brain short-circuited?
Monica struts to me, and I grit my teeth together. “You’ve remembered. See you soon, future husband. It was great seeing you all.” Monica waves at us and flaunts away.
How do I explain? Bria pales as she reads behind my eyes that it’s over, and heartbreak stretches from her to me. Her hurt expression shatters me into hundreds of pieces.
“What did she mean?” growls a not-so-pleased Alexander. Right now, I prefer he beat the shit out of me. I’d endure it better than having to admit my idiocy.
“There’s a binding contract. I’m sorry.”
A collective gasp follows, and because I’m such a damn masochist, my gaze remains fixated on Bria. Tears roll down her scrunched-in-pain face. I fist my hands at my side, hating me.
“We can hire the best lawyers there are, son. Don’t despair.” My father tries to calm the storm dangling around our heads, and a groan wrenches me.
“It was them who made it, Dad. I signed it.”
“Why, brother? Was this worth it?”
Sophia’s discontent cuts through me, and she hugs Bria, a perfect, bea
utiful statue. Only her eyes betray her agony. The visual slices me again.
“What’s stipulated in the contract?” asks Alexander, his patience with me teetering on edge.
“That I’ll marry her. We’ll not fulfill the roles of a married couple, but we’ll pretend for one year. After the time is up, she will be financially taken care of her entire life, and she’ll keep her position in the company as long as she wants it.” Even to my ears, it sounds fucked-up. But it reminds me how well I wasn’t at the time I signed it. A binding contract and prenup in one. Me, taking care of the one woman who was loyal to me. Good fucking plan. By then, I’d lost Bria anyway, there was nothing more for me to lose. I was wrong, and shame burns at my skin.
“This is the man you want, Bria?” Alexander jerks his chin at me and shakes his head. He flashes me a disgusted look and curls his hands into fists at his sides.
“Alex.” Bria shakes her head at him. Her defending me hurts me a hundred times worse.
“I’m sorry, I want to go home. Please excuse me,” Bria’s voice shakes. I force myself to keep standing, not kneel and beg for forgiveness. I’m not worthy of her.
Like so often before, it’s Alexander who’s there for her, holding her through her pain, and this time he has another supporter—my sister. They leave shortly afterward as the judgmental looks of my parents and Bria’s choke the life out of me.
“I’m sorry,” I say, meaning it but knowing it will be futile. I faked an engagement, even worse with the woman who is responsible for everything wrong in my life, out of sheer weakness. I don’t deserve better anyway.
I backtrack, flee to my condo and switch the lights off. The darkness becomes my confinement once again. I could’ve given up everything for her—my freedom and what defines me—but she’ll never look at me the same nor accept it. Still, I have one more confession to make.
BRIA
Everything hurts. My body shivers as if my spirit abandoned my body, and I’m once again a shell. I wipe at the tears streaming down my face. I can’t stop thinking about Damien. Although my heart bleeds because of him, he fills it too.
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