The History in Us

by L. B. Dunbar

  “I think you might be right.” My eyes roamed over her body, hoping she’d take my hint. Innocent blue eyes blinked up at me as I stood inches taller than her. “This place might have just what I’m looking for.” My eyes didn’t leave hers while her lip twisted and she bit the corner. My thumb rose and tugged on her chin to loosen that tender lip from the hard grasp of her teeth. My head came forward, my mouth drawn to hers, and her breath hitched. A hand on my chest and the sound of my name in echo stopped me. Katie’s sweet sound mixed with a male voice behind me.

  “Professor Erickson?” Katie stepped back, now hostage in the room she tried to escape.

  “Hello, Ms. Carter.” Wayne’s dark eyes smiled at her behind his glasses. A momentary flash of Katie pressed against Wayne crossed my vision and I swore softly. Katie’s saucer-sized stare turned on me and she took another step back, misunderstanding my meaning.

  “Levi, you almost ready to leave? Jayne has AJ.” Wayne’s adult daughter said she’d babysit for me, so I could come to the gym today. Wayne’s wife had died years ago, and his thirty-three year old daughter lived nearby. Wayne tried to set us up once, but I turned him down, saying I didn’t want to mix my academics with the professor’s daughter. He thought that was funny.

  “I’ll be there in a second.” I heard Wayne walk away behind me. Katie hadn’t spoken again. Her face flushed that sweet pink color, and her eyes dropped submissively. A smile curled my lips.

  “So you came by the gym today,” I prompted. “Do you watch the games often?”

  “Nope, but Carmela wanted to show me something.”

  “Really?” My eyebrow rose. “Did you like what you saw?”

  She shook her head and chuckled. “I’ll let you know when I do.” She moved to step around me, but I stepped wide to block her again. I wasn’t going to touch her. That would only lead to my mouth wanting to kiss her, which I almost did. I don’t know what came over me. The way she looked at me—hopeful and promising, it made me feel funny inside. Not ha-ha, but like my stomach rumbling with hunger, only deeper. I was starving for that look and it made my lips want to devour her.

  “Katie?” I paused, more nervous than I’d ever been. “Would you like to go out with me?”

  Her expression fell completely. Her eyes lowered, but not in that seductive, submission stance, more like shock. This wasn’t the reaction I expected.

  “I’d like to take you out,” I rephrased.

  “Like to dinner?”

  “Sure. Or anywhere. Just out. On a date.”

  “A date.” Her head came forward, a hard nod emphasizing the question in her voice. What was happening here? Did I misread the signs? I’d been known to do that, just look at Alicia and me. I mean, Katie and I had kissed. We had chemistry. Slowly, it dawned on me. Usually, kissing came after the date, in Katie Carter’s romantic world philosophy. Passionate kissing clandestinely in the basement of a museum wasn’t a date, nor was the groping I gave her in my apartment. Katie needed something a little more solid. A little more involved. A little more romantic, and I had just the idea.

  “Yes, a date. Tonight.”

  Katie

  “I’m not cancelling.” The words came out in a rush before I even completed my hello into the phone.

  “Okay,” I elongated the sound. My eye caught my reflection in the mirror. I was already dressed in a black sheath dress and heels. Bracelets lined my arm and my hair was hot-rollered into loose, bouncy curls. The finishing touch was a wrap for my arms as the nights were growing colder. I hadn’t been on a date in a long time, and decided I was probably overdressed. I was getting ready to change for the third time when Levi called.

  “The babysitter cancelled on me last second, but I still want to go out, it’s just…”

  “It’s fine.” My voice sounded too chipper, too encouraging.

  “No, it’s not fine,” he growled, and I remembered his dislike of the word. “I still want to go, we just need to change the plans.”

  “Okay, like what?” I sighed, stepping out of my heels, internally grateful at the relief of not having to wear those all night. While I wanted to dress up and feel pretty, after an hour, my toes would be begging to be dull again.

  “Well, we might have to take AJ with us.” His voice lowered. “Would that be a problem?”

  I laughed. Technically, the first time we spent together involved AJ, so how could I complain about a second man on my date? “That’s no problem at all.”

  I heard him exhale through the phone.

  “Perfect. We’ll come get you at six.” I had twenty minutes to change again. “But don’t change, you look beautiful.”

  I laughed again. “How do you know? You can’t see what I’m wearing.”

  “I don’t have to, I know you’re beautiful.” I looked at myself in the mirror, trying to see what he saw in me. Freckled nose, dusted lightly with powder to disguise them tonight. Eyes too bright with excitement at the prospects of an evening with Levi. My lips were covered in a soft pink.

  “What if I was naked?” The words tumbled out before I gave them a thought.

  “Definitely don’t change then.” Husky and deep, the light command rolled over me, tickling my skin. I chuckled nervously.

  “Too late, I’m dressed.” I closed my eyes at the lame retort and shook my head. He groaned, not in mockery, but in pleasure.

  “Too bad,” he chuckled.

  * * *

  When Levi arrived, Penelope beat me to the door, readily introducing herself.

  “Penelope Duncan?” His voice hinted at recognition of my best friend, which worried me. He hadn’t recognized me that quickly and Penelope had assured me I’d been more intimate with him than she had.

  “Well, Se…I mean, Levi Walker.” Her eyes roamed him without shame and without acknowledgement of the baby in his arms. “Aren’t you something?”

  Levi chuckled before his eyes found me in the room. They narrowed as he looked at me.

  “I told you not to change.”

  I laughed, knowing he had no idea what I’d been wearing before.

  “Are you spying on me? Is this some military tactic?” I twisted my head left to right as if searching the room for hidden cameras. “Is this all right?” I smoothed a nervous hand down my jeans. The sweater I wore was clingy, but loose at neckline. I figured with AJ’s presence, we wouldn’t be doing anything fancy.

  “I already told you what I think. You’re beautiful.” He said the words unabashedly, not a care that he’d blurted them in front of my roommate. My skin heated and Penelope turned to raise an eyebrow at me.

  “Well—” Penelope began, but I stepped forward, cutting her off. “I guess, we’ll be going.”

  Levi led the way down to the street and his car. City parking was difficult at best, and finding street space in the evening on a weekend nearly impossible. Securing AJ in his car seat, Levi stepped back to open my door and paused.

  “This is awkward, isn’t it? Going on a date with a kid?”

  I gave him my best smile. “I don’t feel awkward,” I lied, knowing it wasn’t AJ that had me feeling nervous and giddy. We drove to an area central to Lincoln Park. Levi took out the stroller and we walked a few blocks until we stood before a delicatessen.

  “Lucky 13?” I asked as I stared at the name.

  “Best place for corned beef sandwiches and Matzo ball soup.” Levi reached around the stroller to open the door, and I entered to find a subway-tiled diner and a sitting counter complete with red, vinyl-covered seats. I smiled deeply at the place. It was perfect. While I would have preferred the counter seats, with AJ we needed a table that could host a highchair.

  “So Penelope Duncan is your roommate?” Levi inquired as we perused the menu. I was afraid to ask my next question.

  “How do you know Penelope?” While Penelope had assured me she hadn’t slept with Levi, she also hadn’t gone into details of her family’s history with the Walkers. I knew almost everything about Penelope, but I seeme
d to be missing a few facts.

  “Her father was friends with my dad.” His eyes shifted quickly down to the menu.

  “You haven’t really mentioned your family. I remember your father died.” His chocolate eyes looked up at me and his mouth curled at the memory, but his eyes shuttered quickly with my next question. “I don’t remember the rest of your family.”

  “I have two brothers. Caleb and Trent.” He paused a moment. “Had. I had two brothers.”

  My brow pinched, willing him to explain. The waitress picked this moment to request our orders, and following Levi’s lead, I ordered a corned beef sandwich on rye and the Matzo ball soup. I waited while she took our menus and then stared at him, encouraging him to continue.

  “Caleb runs a water-sport shop in Traverse City. My brother Trent died. Don’t you remember?”

  I didn’t and shook my head. “When did it happen?”

  Levi was thoughtful a moment, his head tilting to the side. “I guess you would have still been a little kid. I was fourteen.” Levi sighed, swiping a hand over his head. “Seems like a lifetime ago.”

  “So Trent Walker? Should I know that name?” The name did ring an ancient bell, but I couldn’t place how I had heard of his brother before.

  “He dated your aunt.”

  My head pulled back in surprise. “Aunt Pam?” My dad’s sister, Pam, had married a horror novelist, named Jacob Vincent. They lived between New York and Michigan with their three children.

  “No, Tricia.”

  “Oh.” I nodded like I understood, but I didn’t, and I waited again, giving him time to tell me this tale.

  “Your aunt dated my brother for years. I was still in middle school when it started. She was always nice to me. Said she knew I’d make something of myself someday, if I could get around the Walker name.” Levi exhaled. “Anyway, they broke up before she met your uncle Leon.” His eyes shifted to the silverware, where he flipped his fork back and forth over the napkin. My uncle Leon had been a bit of a hell raiser and had grown up in Chicago before he came to Elk Rapids. He says my aunt caught him stealing and he fell in love with her instantly. She says the only thing he stole was her heart.

  “Trent killed himself.”

  “Because of Tricia?” I blurted without thinking. The concept was horrific and romantic in a sick sort of way.

  “Something like that. He did…something…that involved the police and he ran.” The lazy flipping of his fork had turned to a rapid tapping of the item on the Formica table top. I reached across the space and placed my hand over his to stop the aggressive movement.

  “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”

  Taking a deep breath, he spoke. “It’s just been a long time. I don’t like to think of Elk Rapids.”

  “Is that why you didn’t recognize me at first?”

  He snorted softly. “I didn’t recognize you at first because I didn’t want to believe you could be sitting in front of me, of all places in a history class in Chicago.” The teasing gleam to his eyes slowly returned.

  “Seems our history is intertwined a bit more than I thought.” Levi slowly nodded, taking his lower lip between his teeth and distracting me. Our food arrived. Steaming bowls of soup tickled my nose and my mouth watered at the size of the corned beef sandwich, but before I ate, I had one more question. “Is that bad?”

  Levi’s eyes shot to mine as he lifted his spoon, ready to devour our meal. “No, I just don’t like to talk about Elk Rapids.”

  “Do you ever go home?”

  “I am home,” he said, taking a hearty sip of hot soup. “Chicago is where I live. This is my home.” The definitive tone to his voice told me the discussion about Elk Rapids was finished. Moving on to other areas of mystery, I tried a different topic.

  “I’ve been meaning to ask you about the letters.”

  “What letters?” He swallowed hard, but I couldn’t decide if it was the soup or him playing coy.

  “The ones you sent me. The invitation to the coffee shop, the one about the zoo, and the one about us and history.”

  Levi stared at me in complete confusion. Coy was no longer an option. His eyes didn’t blink.

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “The letters. The day after I babysat…and we…you know, you sent me a letter asking me to meet you at Alley Cat, the coffee house.”

  Levi shook his head, blatantly dismissing the idea.

  “That’s where you found me. Standing on the sidewalk before the zoo,” I added, my stomach suddenly dropping. Levi stared and set down his spoon.

  “I wondered how you could be standing there, like you were waiting for me.”

  “I was waiting for you,” I laughed awkwardly. I’d completely misunderstood, though. “But I guess it wasn’t you.”

  Levi’s eyes narrowed. “So what you’re telling me is you were waiting for someone, but it wasn’t me?”

  “I…” I didn’t know how to explain. “I thought the letter was from you. It said you wanted to apologize.”

  Levi’s eyes twinkled and the curve of his mouth shot up to dimple wattage.

  “I already told you, I wouldn’t apologize for kissing you.” I had to smile in return but it didn’t explain the mystery.

  “Then I wonder…”

  “Who sent you the note? Is there something you want to tell me? Someone else?”

  “No,” I offered too emphatically. “No, definitely not.” Sidetracking myself, I picked up my own spoon and took a generous sip of soup. My skin already pink, the hot liquid only added to my heat and burned my throat. Reaching for my soda, I took a hearty drink before asking another question.

  “What about you? What about Alicia?”

  Levi’s mouth fell and his sandwich froze mid-air.

  “Katie, this is supposed to be a date, so I don’t think we should talk about Alicia.” The harshness of his words startled me, and a clatter to my right forced my head to turn. The third-wheel to our date had flung a spoon off the tray of his highchair, reminding us both that Alicia lingered. Levi picked up the spoon but removed it from AJ’s grasp, scooping up soup for him with his own spoon instead.

  “There is no Alicia.” His tone softened. “I haven’t spoken to her since the night you babysat. She’d been refusing to speak to me before that and was adamant about me not calling her again after we spoke that night. I haven’t tried to call again.”

  “But you want to,” I interjected, the words tumbling out with false hope he’d deny it.

  “I don’t want to deny AJ his mother, but it seems she isn’t interested in being part of his life.” He shrugged, his eyes avoiding mine.

  I nodded without further comment. The answer wasn’t conclusive of his feelings about the mother of his child. He’d told me about Alicia’s behavior but not his personal attitude toward her. Levi was thoughtful a moment as he fed AJ.

  “I think I thought I wanted Alicia back because she’s AJ’s mother. I thought we should give it a try, but I don’t know what ‘give it a try’ means when you don’t really love each other. Did it mean try to love one another?” He exhaled. “That just wasn’t going to happen and sticking together for only AJ seemed a little hopeless.”

  I didn’t look up at him, but I was listening.

  “There isn’t any Alicia or anyone else for that matter.”

  I smiled weakly, twisting my lips to stifle the relief. He wasn’t promising me anything, but at least I wasn’t battling with his ex-girlfriend.

  We finished the rest of the meal trying to regain a jovial vibe instead of the heavy weight of his brother, the letters, and Alicia. After dinner, we decided to walk the evening street. Fall was in full force, decorating each storefront with pumpkins and fake foliage in autumn colors. We hadn’t passed three stores before we encountered a book store. I was window shopping the gorgeous cover of the latest sexy romance read when Levi asked: “Want to go inside?”

  “Really?” Surprise didn’t do justice t
o my response. Levi didn’t seem like the bookish type. Then again, I remember him reading the passage from my novel and decided he could read me a grocery list in that voice, and I’d melt on the sidewalk faster than snow under salt.

  “Of course.” He pulled open the door at his side and moved the stroller to allow me entrance. Following after me, we entered a quaint, independent bookstore dedicated to women and children. Levi followed me as my fingers drifted lazily over the spines of books on a shelf. Not really reading the titles, I enjoyed the curve of each cover under my fingertips. Turning the corner for the next aisle, I noticed a children’s section toward the back of the store. I walked forward, directing Levi to follow me.

  “I love children’s books,” I offered for no particular reason when I picked one up and flipped appreciatively through the pages. “I want to write one, one day. Well, one for teens.”

  “Really? I remember you telling me you liked romance. How does that translate?”

  “Any romance is essentially a fairy tale at heart. It’s fiction, so it’s all fantasy.” My eyes drifted to another book, and I picked up Emily’s favorite fairy tale.

  “I like your fantasies,” he muttered before reading over my shoulder. “Beauty and the Beast? Seems fitting.” He paused a moment. “Although I would have thought The Little Mermaid was your favorite.” The sarcasm in his tone struck a chord.

  “Are you trying to be funny?” Referencing a character who couldn’t speak hinted at my selective mutism as a child.

  “It was a legitimate question. I’m sorry.” His voice was contrite. The shock on his face proved he didn’t intend to hurt me. The warm palm of his hand on the base of my spine made all forgiven. His head hung low as he looked at the glossy array of books over my shoulder. I felt his breath on my neck and my mouth watered for him, but I walked around the table, needing some space between us.

  “Actually, my favorite fairy tale is a modern one titled Penelope. The main character is cursed with a pig nose and tail. The way to break the curse is by finding her true love.”