by Stacy-Deanne
“I want you to get out of my face.”
“I just don’t want you to hate me. Please, tell me you don’t hate me.”
Shanti didn’t move.
“I know I fucked up.” Aliyah sniffled. “For the rest of my life, I’ll have to live with that. I never should’ve left you. You’re my little sister, and I should’ve protected you.” She fell to her knees. “You’re my best friend. We’ve always been close, even if we didn’t always agree on things. I love you.”
Shanti rolled over with her back facing Aliyah. Aliyah rose. “Why won’t you talk to me?”
“You have some nerve, don’t you?” Shanti suddenly sprang up and shouted. “I can’t believe you brought your behind in here talking about how bad you feel.” She squinted. “How do you think I feel? Last night was the worst night of my life. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone—not even you, and that’s a lot to say with how I feel about you right now.”
“Shanti…”
“Do you know how much he hurt me?” She gripped the sheet. “Can you imagine how it feels to have a man force himself inside of you when you’re a virgin?”
Aliyah closed her eyes. “No.”
“It hurt.” A tear fell down Shanti’s cheek. “It hurt so bad. I felt like I was ripping in two. I keep wondering what I did to deserve this. Why did it happen?”
“It wasn’t your fault.” Aliyah wiped her face.
“I know it wasn’t.” Shanti laid her head back against the headboard. “It was yours. It happened all because you had to be with A.C. and go to that party. I was dumb enough to wanna look out for you, not knowing you wouldn’t do the same for me.”
“Shanti—”
“The pain Khalil put me through last night and the pain I’ll have to live with…” She shook her head. “…It’s nothing compared to the pain I feel when I think of you. Khalil is just some creep who hurt me. I didn’t expect anything from him. You are my sister, and I thought you always had my back.”
“Please.” Tears fell as fast as Aliyah could wipe them. “I wish it had been me. If I had the power to make it me, then I would.”
“You don’t.” A tear settled on Shanti’s lips. “Until you can, then I don’t need to talk to you.”
“I can’t bear you hating me.”
“I can’t bear to see your face right now.” Shanti lay down. “I guess we’re even.”
CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT
Corrine’s doorbell rang that night. She stopped stirring the cake batter and rushed out of the kitchen. “Just a minute!” She made it to the front door. She looked out the peephole and right into Valerie’s face. “Shit.”
She’d longed to talk to Valerie and make amends, if possible. Now she had to put on her big girl pants and face the music.
Please, don’t let there be any drama.
“Yeah, like that’s possible,” she whispered as she opened the door. “Hey, Val.”
“Hey.” Her gaze trailed down Corrine’s apron. “This is a new look for you.”
“What are you talking about?” Corrine pulled at the apron. “You know I like to bake. Come on in.”
“Wow.” She leaned back. “You’re actually inviting me in?”
“I don’t have a problem with you, Val. It’s the other way around.”
She walked in. “Why are you baking?”
“I’m on my period and got a monster sweet tooth.” Corrine went down the hall with Valerie right behind her. She entered the kitchen while Valerie stayed in the doorway.
“I’m craving like you wouldn’t believe.” Corrine started stirring the cake batter. “I’m making Momma’s coconut cake. Want some?”
“I didn’t come here for cake.”
Valerie put her purse on the table.
“I’m glad you came.” Corrine got her bundt pan off the counter. “I’ve been wanting to talk to you, but hadn’t worked up the nerve.” She poured the batter into the pan. “Ah shit.”
“What?”
“I forgot to grease the pan.” She kept pouring. “Remember making cakes with Momma when we were kids? We always had to take turns who got to lick the spoon and the mixing bowl or who got to eat the soft moist cake that was left when she turned the cake out the cake pan.”
Valerie clasped her hands. “I came here to get an honest answer, and I don’t feel like I can get that from David.”
“This is about David again.” Corrine shook the bundt pan to even out the batter. “Why am I not surprised?”
“Sorry I keep singing this tune, but I have reason to.” Valerie held out her hands. “Believe it or not, I didn’t come here to start shit.”
Corrine put the cake in the oven. “Really?”
“I’m tired of fighting with you and David. I just want the truth.”
Corrine checked the oven’s temperature. “What is it now?”
“I wanna talk about last night.” Valerie crossed her arms. “David didn’t come home. He spent the night at a motel.”
“Let me guess.” Corrine wiped flour off her arm. “You don’t believe him.”
“Sleeping at a motel or not, I don’t believe that’s the only place he visited last night. I’m not in the mood for games. This is my husband we’re talking about. I want the truth. Was David here last night?”
“Yes.”
Valerie opened her mouth then took a deep breath. “He was?”
“Yes.” Corrine stood against the sink. “Is there anything else?”
“Did you sleep with him?”
“No, but he wanted me to.”
“He…” Valerie exhaled. “…he wanted you to?”
“Yes.” Corrine took off her apron and laid it on the microwave. “He came on to me, and I said ‘no.’”
“Whoa.” Valerie chuckled. “Wait a minute. My David came on to you last night?”
“Yes.”
“I suppose you didn’t have anything to do with that?”
“Nope.” Corrine shook her head. “He came here. He was grabbing at me and tried to kiss me.”
Valerie frowned. “David?”
“Yes, David.”
“Wait a minute.” Valerie paced, rubbing her brow. “I’m supposed to believe he came on to you, and you didn’t take him up on it…when I know you’ve been wanting David since I first introduced him to you?”
“I can’t help what you believe or don’t believe, Valerie. But I didn’t sleep with your husband last night. I told him I wasn’t sleeping with him because I cared about you and didn’t wanna hurt you like that.”
She squinted. “Bullshit.”
Corrine pointed toward the doorway. “Maybe you should leave.”
“I’m not going anywhere. You must be a damn fool, Corrine, if you expect me to believe you turned David down. You’ve been waiting eleven years to get my husband into bed.”
“Yes, I have.” Corrine sashayed up to her. “But I love you too much, and the last thing I wanna do is hurt you.”
“Why can’t you just be woman enough to admit it?” Valerie waved her hands. “I know you slept with him. Just admit it!”
“Jesus,” Corrine whispered. “I wanted to make things up to you, but I don’t know if I can. You have too much hate in your heart.”
“Really?” Valerie got the flour off the table and poured it on the floor. “And you got flour on your floor. So what?”
“You…” Corrine gawked at the mess. “I just mopped my floor last night.”
“Looks like you’re gonna need to mop it again.”
“No I won’t, but you will!”
Corrine bent down, scooped up flour, and threw it in Valerie’s face.
“Oh!” Valerie shook her head and blinked her eyes. “You little bitch.”
She shoved Corrine into the table.
Corrine returned the favor. “You must be outta your damn mind to shove me!”
Valerie pushed Corrine onto the floor. “I’ll shove you any time I want to!”
Corrine jumped up, half-covered in flour.
“Is that right?”
“That’s what I said, bitch!” Valerie shouted as she slapped her.
Corrine slapped her back. “I know damn well you didn’t just slap me!”
Valerie slipped in the flour. “Oh!”
Corrine got on top of her. “You must be crazy putting your hands on me!”
“Get off me!” Valerie snatched Corrine’s hair. “I’ll tear out every inch of this cheap weave!”
“You’re not gonna tear out nothing in this house!”
They rolled around the floor, tussling and tugging hair.
“Ah!” Valerie got on top of Corrine. “I hate you! Admit you slept with my man!”
“I didn’t sleep with him!” Corrine rolled her over and ended up back on top. “Listen to me, Val! Don’t make me kick your ass.”
Valerie ripped Corrine’s blouse. “You ain’t kicking shit!”
“My blouse!”
“Ha!” Valerie stuck out her tongue. “You wanna walk around with clothes off half the time…well, there you go.”
“Well, here you go!”
Corrine ripped Valerie’s blouse, sending buttons flying.
“Oh, I know you didn’t!” Valerie covered her bra. “You know how much this blouse cost?”
Corrine got on her knees. “You ripped my shit, and now I’m gonna rip yours.”
“I’m ripping something else!”
Valerie stormed out of the kitchen.
“What?!” Corrine ran out. “Val?!” She stomped down the hall. “Don’t do it. What are you gonna do?!” She shouted as she ran into the living room to see Valerie tearing her curtains off the hook.
“Those are designer curtains!” Corrine slapped her hands on her face. “They cost a fortune!”
“Hmm.” Valerie flung them across the room. “I’d say you paid too much.” She picked the lamp up off the end table. “This is cute.”
“Val, don’t!” Corrine pointed at her. “Do not break my lamp.”
Valerie threw it at the wall, shattering the glass base.
“Are you crazy?!” Corrine jumped up and down. “You’ve lost it, Val! I always thought you were nuts, but now I know for sure!”
CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE
“You gonna come up in my house and tear up my shit?” Corrine raced out of the living room. “I got something for your ass, Val.”
Valerie ran after. “Corrine?!”
Corrine snatched Valerie’s purse off the kitchen table.
“Wait a minute!” Valerie huffed and puffed. “That purse cost five hundred dollars!”
Corrine opened it and snatched out the phone. “Brand new iPhone, huh?”
“No!” Valerie lunged at her. “Give it to me.”
“Catch me!” Corrine threw Valerie’s purse across the kitchen and ran out.
“Corrine, don’t!” Valerie chased Corrine down the hall and grabbed her at the front door. “Don’t you dare mess with my phone!”
“Get off me!” Corrine struggled to open the door with Valerie’s arm around her neck. “Gonna come in my house and tear up my curtains and break my lamp? Oh no, sista! It’s not going down like that.”
“Corrine, don’t!”
“Let’s see if iPhones can fly, Val!” Corrine shouted as she managed to get the door open.
“Corrine!”
Corrine stepped out onto the porch and tossed the phone down the street. As it smashed on the pavement, she smiled at Valerie and went back inside. “How you like them apples?”
“I’m gonna kill you!” Valerie planted her hands on Corrine’s neck and shoved her all the way down the hallway.
“Ugh!” Corrine tried to pry Valerie’s fingers out of her skin.
“You’ve made my life miserable ever since you were born!” Valerie forced her into the living room and threw her on the couch. “I’ve had enough of it!” She kept her hands clamped around Corrine’s neck. “Enough!”
Corrine coughed and choked. “I can’t breathe!” She pulled at Valerie’s arms. “I love you, Val!” She felt weak. “Please…I love you! Stop!”
“Corrine?” Valerie let go of her neck, realizing that she was really hurting her. “Oh God.” She got off Corrine and pulled her into a sitting position.
Corrine coughed and tried to catch her breath.
“Are you all right?” Valerie held her. “I’m sorry, Corrine. I…I don’t know what’s gotten into me.”
“I love you, girl.” She coughed. “I just want us to start over.” She held her neck. “I didn’t kill the baby, Val. I swear to God I didn’t.”
“Oh.” Valerie leaned over and burst into tears. “Why is everything going wrong?”
“Come here.” Corrine hugged her. “We both gotta let go of all the shit that’s happened between us.” She wiped Valerie’s tears with her hand. “I love you, and I always will.”
“I’m drowning, Corrine. I’m losing control over everything. David’s gonna leave me. I know he is.”
“David loves you.”
“Then why did he come on to you? Why does he act like you’re perfect and that I can do no right?”
“Because he’s lonely and misses his wife.” Corrine pushed Valerie’s hair out of her face. “David never has and never will love me. He wants nothing but to have his wife back. You haven’t been acting like the Val he married. Shit, you haven’t been acting like the Val we all know.”
“I’ve been so depressed.” She wiped tears and looked at her hands. “It’s so hard to look at yourself and see a failure.”
“You’re not a failure.”
She scoffed. “I can get a degree and good job, but I can’t make a child? Something women are made to do? What kind of woman am I?”
“Making a baby does not make you a woman.” Corrine dabbed Valerie’s tears. “What makes you a woman is perseverance and rising to any challenge. Val, you’ve been an overachiever all your life. You think you should be perfect, and no one is perfect.”
“I just look back and wonder if I did something to deserve not being able to have kids.”
“Things happen to good people for no reason all the time.” Corrine locked her arm around Valerie’s shoulders. “We both need to work on ourselves and do better. Let’s start now. I’m tired of fighting with you. I’ve missed you, Val. We weren’t ever that close, but we used to be closer than this.”
“Yeah, I guess so.”
“I don’t know how many times I can say it or what I can do to make you believe it, but I did not push you down those steps. Even if I wanted David, I’d never hurt my own nephew or niece. Family is very important to me because it’s all I have.” Corrine let her go. “I realized I gotta be a better woman in order to be happy. That’s why I want us to make up. Please, can we just forget the past and start over?”
“You know it’s always been hard for me to trust people after they’ve hurt me. You did a lot to me when we were growing up, Corrine.”
“I apologize for that from the bottom of my heart.” She clutched Valerie’s hand. “But please know that going forward I would never hurt you on purpose. I was hurting when we were kids. I was devastated to see Dad go through what happened to him and then see Layla have the same mental illness. I didn’t know how to deal with that, and it all turned to resentment and jealousy toward you. You were an easy target, and I’m sorry.”
“Funny.” Valerie chuckled. “David says I seem jealous of you, and I think I have been.”
“Why were you jealous of me?”
“You’ve always been comfortable in your skin. I never have been at home in my own body, and not having kids makes it ten times worse.”
“You’re a beautiful and intelligent woman.” Corrine kissed her cheek. “You gotta see that for yourself. What do you want most out of life besides a baby?”
“To be happy.”
“Does David make you happy?”
“Oh yes.” Valerie smiled wide. “David and I were made for each other. We used to have so much fun. We used to laugh all th
e time. We couldn’t get enough of each other. You know how we were.”
Corrine nodded and smiled.
“I guess I hadn’t noticed how bad things had gotten because of my obsession. Am I supposed to pretend like I don’t want kids?”
“No, but you can’t focus on what you don’t have to the point where you drive away what you do have. You keep pushing David away and then one day he won’t come back.”
“You’re right.” Valerie dabbed her eyes again. “Layla said I might need to talk to someone, and I think she’s right. I got a lot of stuff inside of me that I need to let out.”
“That doesn’t sound like such a bad idea.” Corrine put her hand in Valerie’s lap. “In fact, I could be up for that.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, we both got issues. Why not work on them together? It’ll be our first step to a new relationship.”
Valerie smiled. “I’d like that.”
CHAPTER FORTY
A hint of rosemary and lamb hit David’s nose when he walked into the dimly lit living room that night. A table sat in the middle of the floor covered by a luxurious, red tablecloth. A vibrant, floral centerpiece sat in the middle of the table next to a bottle of red wine. Low music played in the background. Thin, red cloth shielded the lamps to give the room an auburn glow.
Valerie twisted into the room with two wine glasses. She wore that white, sheer nightgown he bought her last year for their anniversary before things had gotten so out of hand.
“You’re home.”
She smiled brighter than she had in months. That twinkle she used to have when she looked at him had claimed her eyes again. Her creamy, tan skin glowed underneath the auburn lighting.
The nightgown perfectly accented her sensuous shape and the movement of her hips. It had been so long since he’d not been afraid to be alone with her for fear of another argument.
“I’ve missed you.” She set the glasses on the table. “Let me take this for you.” She took his briefcase and set it beside the wall. “I’ll take this for you too.” She slid his blazer off him. “You smell good.”
“Thanks…uh…” He raised an eyebrow. “What’s going on?”