by L.H. Cosway
Ellen led me into the kitchen where her dad sat reading a newspaper. He was a bespectacled, grey-haired man, with the same kind brown eyes as his daughter.
“Els! I didn’t hear you come in,” he said, standing to pull her into a hug. “It’s so good to see you. I’ve missed you so much.”
He squeezed her tight, and something about his affection for her gave me a pang in my chest. When I went to visit Mum, she never greeted me like this. If she were having a good day, she’d give a small smile, a bad day and all you got was a derisive nod, barely any eye contact.
“Dad, this is my, um...”
Seeing she was at a loss as to how to explain our relationship, I decided to take one for the team. And okay, perhaps I was also being a little opportunistic. “I’m Julian. Ellen’s new boyfriend.”
Ellen’s eyes widened, and her dad appeared surprised. She obviously hadn’t told him she was bringing a friend, certainly not a boyfriend. He gave me a quick once over then held his hand out for a shake. “Julian. It’s good to meet you. I wish I could say my daughter has told me all about you, but well, she hasn’t.” He shot her an accusing look.
I laughed cordially. “That’s quite all right. Ellen and I have only known each other for a few months, but I’m honoured she invited me this weekend. You have a lovely home.”
“Thank you,” he replied, looking back to Ellen. “Shayla is staying at the hotel tonight, and I have to run a few errands this evening, but you two get settled and order in some food.”
“Sure, Dad,” she replied, seeming a little shy after I introduced myself as her boyfriend. It needed to be done though. There was no way I was being friend-zoned for the weekend and sleeping on the couch.
Ellen led me upstairs and I grinned when I saw her childhood bedroom. The walls were pale yellow, flower printed bed sheets, and cornflower blue curtains. There weren’t any embarrassing posters of boy bands. Instead, one entire wall was lined with bookshelves, and there was a framed movie poster of A Room with a View.
Ellen saw where I was looking. “It was my favourite film when I was a teenager.”
I walked around her room. Directly out her window was the sea. She definitely had a room with a view.
She sat on the edge of the bed, chewing on her lip. “What are you thinking?”
“I was just thinking, I can’t imagine ever having a bad day living here.”
“It’s pretty peaceful.”
I shot her a cheeky wink. “Tell the truth. Did you ever go skinny-dipping on the beach when you were a teenager?”
She shook her head. “I was the most boring kid on the planet. When I went to the beach, I usually brought a book.”
I dropped down beside her. “You never went out with your friends, drank too much cider, and snogged a boy who was no good for you?”
“Nope. I spent most weekends with my dad or my brothers.”
“Well, that just won’t do,” I tutted and stood, holding out my hand to her.
“What’s going on?”
“You’re taking me out and giving me a tour of your hometown. Then we’re going to have greasy fish and chips for dinner before buying a bottle of cheap cider to drink on the beach.”
She didn’t look convinced. “That sounds...”
“Marvellous. I know. Now, come on.”
We spent an hour walking around Torquay. Ellen pointed out places of interest before we stopped at a café. “My brother, Nick, works here. We can see if he’s around. He might give us free coffee.”
I gestured for her to lead the way. Inside there was a guy with the same curly brown hair as Ellen, but instead of brown eyes, his were blue. He was pouring a latte when he spotted her walk in, his smile wide and confident.
“Would you look what the cat dragged in,” he called out.
“Thought I’d drop in and say hello.”
“Come here and give me a hug, baby sis.”
She went to him, and they embraced. I was so glad she had people who loved her this much. Again, my chest itched in a way no amount of scratching would soothe.
“Who’s this?” he asked, eyes coming to me.
“I’m the new boyfriend,” I replied.
“This is Julian,” Ellen supplied, looking a little flushed at me dropping the boyfriend bomb again.
Nick looked me up and down, somewhat impressed, then gaped at Ellen. “Whuuut?”
Ellen slapped him on the shoulder. “Don’t sound so shocked.”
“Well, what do you expect? You tell me everything, and you never once mentioned a boyfriend. Nice to meet you, Julian, by the way.”
“You, too. Ellen tells me you’re the nice brother.”
“Yep, you’ll understand once you meet Cameron.”
I laughed. “I’m looking forward to it.”
“Come on and sit down. What can I get you both to drink?”
We spent a half an hour chatting with Nick, who apparently dropped out of college to backpack across Asia, before returning to his hometown to work as a barista and regale customers with tales of his travels. He was a delight, and I wondered how two siblings could be so different in countenance. If Nick was an open book, then Ellen was closed tight. She was coming out of her shell, sure, but it was still interesting to note the differences.
Her arm was linked through mine as we strolled along the beach. Just as I’d promised, we stopped for fish and chips, then paid a visit to the local off-licence for a bottle of cider. When we found a suitable spot, I took off my jacket, spread it out on the sand and gestured for her to sit. We drank in quiet, passing the bottle back and forth as we watched the tide go out.
“Tell me something about you I don’t know yet,” I said as I admired her profile. The sun was starting to go down, the dimming golden rays falling across her face, highlighting the smattering of freckles across her nose and cheeks.
“Like what?”
“What were you like at school?”
She took a swig of cider, staring off into the distance. “I was quiet, kept to myself. I had selective mutism up until the age of six. Most of my family put it down to Mum dying, but I was only two when that happened, so I’m not sure that’s true.”
“You never know. Things can affect us in strange ways when we’re still developing.” I’d heard of selective mutism before, but I didn’t think it was a very common thing. It made sense for Ellen to have it, considering how shy she was.
“I guess so. Anyway, it was my curse from there on out. Even when I started talking, I was still unbearably shy. Socialising was almost a physical pain. I don’t know how to describe it.”
“Did you ever see a therapist?”
She shook her head. “My dad runs his own construction company. He’s a man’s man, doesn’t really like to talk about feelings. I guess he thought my issues would resolve on their own. That sounds really bad, doesn’t it?”
“Hey, you’re looking at someone who definitely could’ve benefitted from therapy from an early age, too, but I barely knew what it was until I went to rehab.”
“At least you got there eventually. It’s just, the idea of sitting in a room and telling a stranger all my issues makes me break out in hives. It feels self-indulgent, like people have bigger problems, you know?”
I looked at her affectionately. “Everything is relative, Ellen.”
She exhaled heavily. “I’m a mess.”
“A hot mess though,” I said, nudging her with my elbow. “And hotness is all that really matters in life, right?”
She laughed. “You’re a goof.”
“And you’re gorgeous, tell me something else. You’ve achieved so much with your books, but what else do you aspire to?”
Ellen took a moment to think about it. “This might not sound very original, but I’d love to go travelling. I haven’t been on a holiday since I was eighteen.”
I frowned. “Why not?”
She lifted a shoulder and pursed her lips, like she felt awkward or embarrassed. “I guess I don’t rea
lly have anyone to go with, and I’ve always been too afraid of travelling alone. Nick backpacked across Asia all by himself. He’s very fearless in that way. I feel like travelling will make me a better writer. If I could see the world, experience other cultures, it would help me understand people better, portray their emotions and motivations more realistically on the page.”
“It’s true that travel broadens the mind,” I said. “But you shouldn’t feel like you need someone to go with you. Then again, if you’re not comfortable going alone, you shouldn’t feel obliged to do that either. Sure, whenever I’m in the mood to get away, I just go. But like I always say, it’s different strokes for different folks.”
“Maybe I’ll be brave enough someday.”
I held her gaze. “I’ve no doubt you will.”
A moment passed before she spoke again. “You’re very good at giving advice, do you know that?”
“That’s only because I’ve made so many mistakes.”
She ran her finger through the sand, making a pretty swirl shape. I stared at her lips, wanting to kiss her. “Come here,” I murmured and reached out to grab her chin.
She shifted out of reach. “I’m not kissing you with cider breath, Julian, go away.”
I grinned deviously and came at her. “Oh, yes you are.”
She squealed and rolled to the side. I crawled on top of her and laid a big, wet slobbery kiss on her lips.
“You’re awful,” she complained, unable to help her laugher.
I gazed down at her, my chest too full. “I’m the best and you know it.”
Her expression softened as she whispered. “Yeah, I think you might be.”
Chapter Twenty
Ellen
Parties were not an easy thing for me. As I got ready for Dad and Shayla’s pre-wedding dinner, my nerves kicked in, just like they always did. I was going to have to see all my relatives, meet Shayla’s, smile and make small talk all evening. After the book signing back in London, my ‘interacting with people’ reserves were almost dried up.
I was just glad Julian would be with me. In this new world where I didn’t dress up, but rather was brave enough to be myself, he was a comfort blanket I feared letting go of.
Last night, we got drunk on the beach, then came home and passed out in bed. I wasn’t even disappointed that we didn’t have sex, because it was the most fun I’d had in ages. Just the two of us, hanging out, talking and being silly together.
Again, the place in my heart that he’d claimed expanded.
Julian was so open and playful, so loving even though he’d grown up in a way that should’ve hardened him. I got the sense that his relationship with Rose, the way she loved him like he was her own flesh and blood, was the one thing that saved him from himself.
I put on the bright yellow cocktail dress and studied myself in the full-length mirror by my bed. I’d originally bought it for Elodie, but maybe she wasn’t the only one who could pull it off. Maybe Julian was right, and Elodie was me just as much as I was Ellen.
I pinned my hair up in a loose bun, making an extra effort with my makeup. Julian emerged from the bathroom in a towel, having just showered. We spent most of the day lounging around and watching TV. It had been bliss.
“Cameron’s picking us up soon, so you better hurry,” I said as he came to stand behind me. I stood by the mirror, putting on my earrings. He bent and pressed a kiss to the hollow of my neck and a tremor went through me.
“Don’t worry. I won’t take long,” he murmured, then went to get dressed. Sometimes even the way he spoke turned me on.
Julian really knew how to pull off a shirt and slacks combo. He was going formal tonight and my thighs clenched at the sight of him.
“Quit looking at me like that or we really will be late,” he warned, eyes hot as they wandered over my dress. “You look amazing, by the way. Channelling Elodie are we?”
I smirked. “Maybe.”
“Well, she looks good on you.”
A horn honked outside, and I knew it was Cameron. He wasn’t one for making the effort to get out and knock. I slipped on my heels when we reached the bottom of the stairs, then opened the front door. Cam’s Volkswagen sat idling by the kerb, Nick in the passenger seat. I took a deep breath and held Julian’s hand as we walked over and got inside.
“Swit-swoo, look at you all gussied up!” Nick exclaimed. “I think you’re a good influence on her, Julian.”
“I try my best.”
“I’m Cameron,” my other brother put in, eyeing Julian suspiciously through his overhead mirror.
“Hello, it’s great to meet you,” Julian nodded. Cameron only grunted in response then put the car into gear.
“Don’t mind Mr. Congeniality over here. He’s in a mood because Shayla’s been trying to set him up with her niece,” Nick said.
“It’s a bit incestuous, if you ask me,” Cam grumped, eyes on the road.
“You haven’t even met her yet. She could look like Jessica Alba for all you know.”
“She could also look like Ann Widdicombe. I’d rather not take the chance.”
Nick rolled his eyes. “If she’s her niece, then she’s hardly going to be as old as Ann Widdicombe.”
Cam blew out an irritated breath. “A young version of her then.”
“I don’t know,” Julian put in. “Old Anny was kinda cute in her day. I bet she loves taking charge in the bedroom, too. Those conservatives are always a kinky sort.”
Nick let out a loud laugh. “I like your boyfriend, Ellen. He’s funny.”
Cameron remained unimpressed as he focused back on driving. When we arrived at the hotel where the ceremony would take place tomorrow, Julian came around to my side of the car to help me out.
“And a gentleman, too,” Nick commented with a wink. “I think this one’s a keeper.”
“What do you think?” Julian whispered in my ear. “Want to keep me?”
I swallowed thickly, not sure how to respond. I shivered when he pressed his hand to my lower back and guided me inside. A private dining room had been reserved, and Dad and Shayla stood by the door, welcoming everyone in.
Shayla wore a fitted burgundy dress that came to just over the knee, her dark hair styled in wavy curls. She was very attractive, not just for her age, but in general. Dad had done well for himself, but then again, so had she. My dad was always known as a catch around our town, but no woman had been able to turn his head until Shayla came along. She was ambitious and headstrong, perhaps a little vain, but also savvy. I figured she wasn’t all bad, especially since she knew about my books and didn’t tell anyone. She was loyal to Dad. If he asked her to keep a secret, she kept it. At least that was something.
She was a little taken aback when she saw me, since every other time we’d been together I wore baggy jeans and cardigans. “Ellen, you look beautiful. I hardly recognised you.”
Dad frowned, seeming to nudge her a little. She coughed, realising how that sounded. “I mean, you’ve always been beautiful, but that dress is simply stunning on you.” She came forward and kissed me on each cheek.
“Uh, thanks. I’d like you to meet Julian,” I said.
Her eyes lit up when she saw him. Even though she was marrying my dad tomorrow, I didn’t blame her. It was the effect Julian had on most women and Shayla was no different.
“Oh, yes, the boyfriend. Greg told me. I’m so happy to meet you, Julian,” she said, giving him the same kisses on either cheek. She studied him as she withdrew, her expression thoughtful. “Do you know what? You look so familiar, have we met before?”
Something in my gut tightened. Had they met before? Since Shayla moved here from London, it was definitely possible.
“I don’t believe so,” Julian replied cordially. “I think I’d remember a face as lovely as yours.”
She tittered in response, and we went to take our seats. Something about the incident niggled at me though. When we were seated, I leaned close to Julian. “What was all that about?”
He frowned and fiddled with his place setting. “I’m not sure. We might’ve crossed paths, but I don’t recognise her.”
“Oh. Well, you probably just remind her of someone.”
“Probably,” Julian agreed.
After that one speed bump, the rest of the evening went without a hitch. I managed to make small talk with my cousin, Chloe, who sat on the other side of me, while Julian chatted with Nick. I knew those two would get along.
When we got home, we had the house to ourselves, since Dad was staying at the hotel. He and Shayla were sleeping in separate rooms, for fear of bad luck, but my future stepmother didn’t want to take the risk that he’d be late. Since we only lived a twenty-minute drive away, that wasn’t very likely, but I got the impression she wanted everything to be perfect.
I stepped into my bedroom and Julian closed the door then came up behind me. He pulled my hair out of its bun, swept it over my shoulder then proceeded to pepper kisses along my neck. I sighed in pleasure and sank back into him. His arm wrapped around me, his hand pressing to the front of my stomach and bringing my bottom flush with his erection.
“I’ve wanted you all evening,” he confessed, hand moving up. He pulled the front of my dress down and slipped his hand inside to fondle my breast. I arched my spine, circling my hips against his hard-on. He let out a deep, masculine groan then broke away.
I watched, breathless, as he pulled what appeared to be a blindfold from his bag. Next, he removed a small black box and presented it to me like a gift.
“For you,” he said, mouth curving in a way that sent my pulse racing.
“What is it?” I asked, full of curiosity as I tore the box open. Inside was a bright pink dildo. I blinked, then glanced at him. He wore a sexy smile and I laughed.
“That is quite possibly the girliest dildo I’ve ever seen.”
“I thought the inviting colour might make it less intimidating.”
I stared at it, admittedly fascinated. “I’ve never used a sex toy before.”
Julian’s expression smouldered. “In that case, you’re in for a treat.”