“Like date? No.”
I chuckled. “That’s not what I meant. I wouldn’t say you’d be brothers, but you know what I mean. If Arthur and I get serious, you’re going to be spending a lot of time with Leo. Are you all right with that?”
“Yes. No. I don’t know. But you’re the best intervention teacher there is. If you can’t fix him, no one can.”
“This wouldn’t be the same.”
“I know that,” he said quietly. “I just think that maybe what Leo needs is more people who believe in him.
“Isn’t that what you always say? That troubled kids shine when they realize that you believe they can make changes. Why would Leo be any different? Because he’s bullying your kid?”
I shook my head. “When did you get so grown up?”
“I have a good role model.”
* * *
I woke up early the next day, leaving a note on the counter for Eddie and letting him sleep in. His homework was still on the kitchen table, but at some point after I’d gone to bed, he’d finished it all, then stacked it neatly in a pile with a sticky note on top, asking that I take it to school for him. I grabbed the pile of papers, coffee, and a bagel, then hurried out the door.
A new pile of homework assignments for the next week was waiting for me at the front office when I walked in. “I guess Eddie emailed you,” I said to Principal Moss.
She rolled her eyes. “Four times since Monday morning. I can’t believe how fast he’s blowing through his assignments." She leaned in, looking around the common area in the administrative wing of the building to make sure no one was listening in on our conversation. “How was volunteering?”
I gave a half-hearted shrug. “It went well enough. We made some headway, at least.”
“I’m sorry about that. I don’t like the zero-tolerance rule any more than you do, but my hands were tied. How about Leo; isn’t he just the worst?”
I recoiled internally, but I kept my face passive. Had she really said that to me? I wondered, as I pasted a smile on my face. “He’s something else.”
“Well, good luck with that. I’ve already put in the paperwork to send him your way. If anyone can keep that boy out of juvenile detention, it’s you.”
“But I thought they had until the volunteer program was over before they would be referred to the alternative campus.”
She scoffed. “Eddie is fine. I’m going to pull some strings and see if I can’t get him back next Monday. But Leo is a lost cause, and there’s no use waiting to put the paperwork in. He’s sabotaged every other attempt at intervention. I’m sure he’ll find a way to do the same at Hopeway House.”
I nodded, but I was fuming inside. “I have to go. Lots to do today,” I said, trying to keep my voice light.
“Have a great day,” she said, then left the room, her steps as light as air.
I was still shaking my head when I got into my car and headed toward Stems and Seeds. I caught my reflection in the mirror, and saw the sadness in my eyes that went clear down to my soul.
“Poor Leo,” I said quietly. “If she’s telling me that she doesn’t believe in him, then he feels it." Even if he didn’t realize it.
It was no wonder the boy couldn’t seem to get his act together. If the rest of the staff felt the same as Principal Moss, they were likely projecting those feelings.
The pity I felt for Leo was only overshadowed by the sense of shame that washed through me. I knew kids like Leo; I’d dealt with them five days a week for over a decade. Yet I’d let myself get angry enough at him to lose sight of what I knew.
Maybe Leo had failed to act right, but I’d failed him right out of the gate. I could do better. I needed to do better, if Arthur and I had a shot at working.
My hands were shaking when I pulled into the parking lot of Stems and Seeds. I parked on the side of the building so Arthur wouldn’t see me coming, then strode quickly toward the entrance, eager to get into the store and talk to him. The hard soles of my shoes clicked on the concrete, and the door chimed when I opened it, announcing my presence with its dainty little jingle.
“Welcome to Stems and Seeds,” Arthur said without looking up, his attention on the customer he was helping.
I stepped out of his line of sight, perusing the shelves and watching him with a petite older lady as he went over some information with her. He used a lavender highlighter to mark instructions as he explained everything, smiling warmly at her when she repeated everything back to show she understood.
He was relaxed and completely in his element behind the counter. I could see from where I stood that the woman was buying some sort of supplement, and not the medicinal marijuana that was stored behind the case.
He rang her up and bagged her things, and in a few moments, she was heading out the door with her purchases in hand and an expression of calm on her face. She was confident, and looked almost relieved.
Arthur had done that, just by being Arthur.
He finished writing something in a ledger by the cash register, then looked up to see who had come in while he was busy. When our eyes met, he froze.
I stepped forward and gave him what I hoped was a reassuring smile. “This place isn’t at all how I pictured it.”
“That’s good to know,” he said, hesitating. “Jonas, why are you here?”
I cleared my throat nervously. “I guess we’ll get right to it, then. I’m sorry for how I handled things the other day. I was shocked that Leo was the kid who had bullied Eddie, and I wasn’t prepared to see you in that role.”
“I don’t know why,” he muttered, eyes narrowed. “You made it clear that I am a shit parent.”
I took in a deep breath, let it out, and tried again. “I deserved that, but you didn’t deserve what I said to you. Leo is acting out, and while I don’t parent like you do, that doesn’t mean that my parenting is better, or that yours is subpar.
“Leo has been through significant trauma, something I’ve never dealt with when raising Eddie. Who’s to say that my style of parenting would’ve done any better with Leo?”
“What are you saying?”
“That I was wrong. Well, at least, that I was wrong to flip out like that. I should’ve taken the time to get to know Leo before I wrote him off.”
Arthur shook his head. “You’re not the first.”
I stepped forward, reaching out and taking his hand that was resting on the countertop. “Arthur, I’m sorry. I don’t know how to make you understand how sorry I really am."
I squeezed affectionately. “I’ve just seen firsthand how adults who should have been rooting for Leo have assumed he was going to fail.”
“You have?”
I nodded. “Principal Moss being one. I’m sure he picks up on that, and it doesn’t help his situation. Leo needs more people in his corner, and you need a support system, just like anyone else.”
Arthur looked like he was afraid to hope. “And you want to be that support system for me and Leo?”
“Yes.”
“What does Eddie think?”
I chuckled. “Eddie was the one who read me the riot act for writing Leo off so quickly.”
Arthur’s eyebrow shot up. “Really?”
“I was surprised, too. But after we talked for some time, we both agree that Leo might benefit from having someone his age around, and from having two adults to help guide him.”
He let out a little rush of air. “I guess I didn’t think we were that serious already.”
“I’m not suggesting that we move in together. But maybe if we got together once a week, like after volunteering, then the boys could bond, and maybe Leo would start feeling like it’s safe to let some of those walls down.”
“Wow,” Arthur said.
“What?”
“I just can’t believe, after everything Leo has done, that you’re willing to take a chance on him. On us.”
“You sell yourself short, Arthur. You’re a good guy, and I know that. I just let my daddy bear co
me out and lost sight of what was important.”
“Thank you for saying that.”
“It’s the truth." I brought his hand to my lips and kissed his knuckles. “I’ve missed you these past few days. I can’t tell you how many times I wanted to call.”
“So have I.”
“How are the extra sessions going at Hopeway?”
“Leo seems to be enjoying himself, even though he’ll never tell you that. And he’s been a little more open at home. We still have a long way to go, but there’s been progress.”
“You just take it one day at a time.”
“And what about us? Can we take things one day at a time? No pressure, and no unrealistic expectations?”
Leaning forward, Arthur pressed his mouth to mine in a sweet, almost chaste kiss. He deepened the kiss until his tongue was in my mouth, tasting, exploring, but still tentative and gentle.
When he pulled away, I couldn’t hide the huge grin on my face. “One day at a time?” he asked again, and I nodded.
I didn’t know if we would make it for the long haul, but I was more than willing to give our love a fighting chance.
14
Leo
I was coming down the stairs for dinner when I heard my dad on the phone. He was laughing, flirting, obviously talking to him.
“I’m looking forward to it, too. Yeah, I think we should let them volunteer together one more weekend before we move forward. Leo really does better when he eases into things.”
I stiffened. What gives him the right? I thought, angry that he was talking about me behind my back. Ease me into what?
My stomach dropped, and I carefully walked down the last two steps, keeping the wall between me and my dad. I held my breath, but I couldn’t hear the man on the other line. I could only hear my dad, and what I was hearing wasn’t good.
“I’ve hired a second employee, and both are doing well at the shop. I think I’ll take the rest of this week off and all of next week so the transition will go smoother." The other man said something, and Dad laughed.
“You’re right. I do worry too much. Anyway, I have to get dinner taken care of. You enjoy dinner at your parents’ house." There was a pause, then, “I’m glad we worked things out, too.”
I backed up the stairs quickly, and was almost to the top when he appeared around the corner and smiled at me. “You wanna go out to dinner with your old dad tonight?”
“No,” I said.
He blinked, then kept talking, that stupid, lovey-dovey smile on his face like he could change my mind. “Even if we go to Antonio’s?”
“Screw Antonio’s." My stomach growled and my mouth water, but I stood my ground. “I’d rather die.”
I expected him to tell me how it pained him to hear such ugly words from my mouth, but his smile didn’t budge. Oh shit, I thought. Something’s going down. I was shaking now, but the sadness that normally showed on his face any time we fought wasn’t there.
When he shrugged, I saw red. He didn’t care! “Suit yourself,” he said.
Then he walked away. I stood there, staring at the spot where he’d been, then I turned around and went back to my room and slammed the door. Pacing around, I relived Dad’s end of the conversation over and over, trying to figure out what they were talking about.
Had that man convinced Dad to send me away? The more I thought about it, the scarier the possibilities were. One thing was for sure; Eddie and his dad were butting into my life, and I wasn’t going to take it.
I smelled the pizza before I heard the knock on the door. My stomach rumbled. “I got a deep-dish pepperoni.” Dad’s muffled voice came through the closed door. “Unless you don’t want it.”
I listened to his footsteps as he walked back down the stairs, then ran to the door and flung it open, smiling for the first time since I had caught him talking crap behind my back. There was nothing there.
He must have it, I thought, narrowing my eyes. He always left the pizza in front of my door, along with a two-liter of Pepsi. What kind of game was he playing?
I went down the stairs slowly, suspicious. My nose wrinkled and my eyes rolled back as the delicious scents mingled and floated through the doorway of the kitchen and up the stairs. He was in the kitchen with my food, sitting at the table, Jenga already stacked and ready to go.
“I thought you might like a rematch,” he said, without looking up at me.
“We haven’t played since my twelfth birthday,” I reminded him.
“Right. And if I am correct, you got your butt stomped.”
I narrowed my eyes, and he smiled at me. “Fine,” I said. “Did you get me some soda?”
“I did.” He handed me a single-serving bottle of Pepsi. When I looked up, he smiled again. “It’s late, and we could both use some sleep. I don’t want you up all night.”
“I can handle it.”
“I know you can.”
I waited, but another, larger bottle of soda didn’t appear. I wanted to argue, but he was already looking at the tower of wooden pieces, one hand holding a slice of pizza, the other hovering around the game, fingers twitching while he considered every option.
“Loser goes first,” I said, then cringed.
“Go ahead, then. I’m not getting any younger.”
I took the first piece, stacking it on the top without so much as a wobble, then sat down and devoured a slice of pizza while he planned his move.
* * *
I was done with my entire pizza when my dad pulled a piece, and the now-gigantic tower came tumbling down. I clapped my hands together and laughed. “I win,” I chanted.
He laughed, giving me a high-five and setting the game back up while I took my pizza box to the recycle bin. He took the first move this time, and like the previous game, I stomped him into the ground, laughing when the wooden pieces bounced across the kitchen floor and scattered to the far corners.
“Best two out of three?” he asked.
“I just won two games,” I laughed. “Doesn’t that mean you already lost?”
Dad smiled. “I didn’t lose,” he said. He was staring at me, his head tilted.
He pinched his lips together, then looked at the clock. “It’s late. Let’s say we pick this up tomorrow after volunteering.”
I groaned. “Again?”
“You seemed to be enjoying your time yesterday with Mrs. Granger.”
“Volunteering is lame.”
“Of course it is.” He rolled his eyes. “But you still have to do it, and until you can prove to Mrs. Granger that you don’t need extra attention, you’ll be there every day."
He looked at me, waiting for me to say something. I sighed, biting my lip and looking him in the eye. “I’ll try. I don’t want to get up this early all week next week, too.”
“Perfect. We’ll pick up our game after lunch.”
“What about homework?”
“Homework can wait. This is more important." He stood up and kissed me on top of the head. “Good night. Turn the lights off when you go to bed, please.”
“I will, Arthur,” I said.
I sat there for a long time, fiddling with the wooden blocks for a bit before I put them away in their box. I was smiling when I saw my dad’s phone on the counter and remembered the conversation earlier. The smile slid off my face, and I shook my head.
I knew the phone was locked, so checking the text messages was out of the question. But I didn’t need to snoop through his phone to know that he and Eddie’s dad were up to something. Playing games with my dad while we ate pizza and drank soda had reminded me of how nice it was to have him all to myself.
Even when he was being a total geek, we still had fun. I didn’t want to share my dad with anyone. I wasn’t going to let his relationship ruin that, and there was no way I was going to be friends with Eddie. Ever.
Eddie
I watched my dad eating from across the table, quietly chewing the lasagna that Grandma had made from scratch, just like she did every Wednesday
night. I drank my sparkling cider and wished my dad would let me try a bit of the white wine that Grandma served with the family meal.
I was still looking at my glass when Grandpa turned to me and smiled, tilting his head forward to gaze at me over the rims of his glasses. I bet he’s already tipsy, I thought. His smile was a little too lopsided for him to still be sober. “So, how is school, Eddie?”
“I’m not going right now,” I said. I took another bite, closing my eyes and savoring the flavor.
Grandpa turned and glared at Dad. “You are homeschooling him, are you?” he asked, hanging on the word as if my father was corrupting the very fiber of my moral being.
Dad looked at me, then took a swig of his wine and set the glass down. “No. Eddie defended himself against a bully at school, and both boys were suspended.”
“That can’t be what happened,” Grandpa said, then turned to Aunt Charlotte. “Char, would the school suspend the victim?”
“Dad, I’m telling you what happened. Why are you asking her?”
“She works in the schools.”
“I work in the schools,” my dad said. “And Char is a school nurse.”
“But she works with the good kids,” Grandma insisted.
Dad looked at me and I shrugged. “Leo isn’t a bad kid, Grandpa. He’s just had a lot of trauma in his life. His adopted dad is doing his best, and volunteering with Leo isn’t so bad. Arthur really does love him.”
“Arthur?” Grandma said.
Dad shot me a look and mouthed the words What the hell?
I smirked as I watched Grandma tilt her head as she looked for the memory, then she smiled and nodded. “It’s funny, I must have things mixed up."
She turned to my dad again. “I thought you said Arthur was the name of the man you’ve been dating. What was his name again?”
“Arthur,” my dad said slowly, glaring at me again.
I took another bite.
“Oh, okay. That’s weird that this boy’s father and your new man have the same name.”
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