Tears were in her eyes, but the words that spilled out still burned with rage. "Why did you make me do that?"
Fei Zhang grabbed the sword and in a daze pulled himself backward, wrenching the sword out of him. He was no longer impaled, but dizziness and weakness extended his backward motion, and he stumbled. In a whirlwind of pain and blood he lumbered past the shivering survivor and her baby, over the cliff, and into the dark of the night. Then he knew only blackness and a sea of trees as he fell.
He awoke the next day. The sky he saw between the treetops was pale and gray with smoke. Despite the chaos that had happened on the ridge above, the forest was quiet and still. He had landed in a rocky creek. Fei Zhang's blood dripped into the stream and was carried along with the water. He felt some part of him was washing down the stream with it.
As he tried to move, he felt incredible pain. But despite that, he knew that his wounds were such that he would still live. He could crawl away from this one and live another day. But without his best friend, without the only life he knew, would it be worth it? Could he live on totally alone?
Fei Zhang carefully shrugged off the robes of the Thousand Hands. They were stained and stiff with his blood and he no longer felt any comfort or pride in wearing the red of his former cause anymore. His underclothes left him poorly dressed, but at this point he didn't care. His serpent spear had fallen near him and he carried that, knowing that even if it was a weapon of war, he needed some protection. At this moment, it was a better crutch than a weapon.
He washed his wounds in the stream and began hobbling upstream. He knew the gift from the old man helped him survive, but at this point, in so much pain, having been betrayed by his life partner, he thought the gift was a curse. A long life alone, hated by some for what he was, hated by others for what he wouldn't do. He mused whether it was better to be alone or to be with others and be hated.
With painful effort, he wandered the forest, looking for some safe place or a way out of the valley. He wandered for hours in the worst moment of his life before the best thing in his life finally arrived. He heard the singing. In all his days, he hadn't ever heard anything like it. He had heard songs in a few villages he had lived in, but they were mostly the songs of farmers and the songs of drinkers. This music was different. This voice and its words weren't possessed with life and camaraderie, with a life lived at home around a hearth. No, this singing was full of the forest and the way, the sky and the wind. A feminine voice whose sound perfectly described a life of joy and contentment. He immediately began following this voice to its source.
The music lead him to a small waterfall that trickled down into a pond. Within that small body of water was perhaps the most beautiful woman Fei Zhang had seen. She wore a white robe and stood on the rocks, wringing her dark hair in the falling water. She was singing the song he had heard, her eyes closed in serenity.
Fei Zhang listened for a minute from afar, enjoying the peace the music inspired him but also worrying that he was intruding upon her. But when she seemed oblivious to his presence, he decided to get closer so he could hear better. That was his mistake. His grace gone due to his wounds and pain, he lumbered through the brush and stepped loudly on a twig. The woman's eyes fluttered open and her song stopped. Her eyes immediately fell upon him and fear crossed her face. Perhaps it was his rough and haggard appearance, perhaps it was the spear he leaned upon. Only then did Fei Zhang realize what a scary sight he must have been.
In a moment, she turned and transformed. Where once was a woman in white there now was a snow white fox. The small animal leapt into the bushes and was gone, the footsteps receding into the distance.
Fei Zhang stared and blinked for a moment. It was rare to meet other animal spirits out of the Thousand Hands. And even within that group, fox spirits were rare. The other foxes that he had met had decided not to join, preferring hidden lives to those of war. To find one he had never met by accident in the unknown forest he found himself in was either an impossible occurrence or the work of the way.
Since she was gone, he decided to clean himself in the fresher water of the waterfall. It provided him some time to think as he refreshed himself. Fei Zhang decided that he should find the vanishing fox and talk to her. Why not? He had no place to go. He could leave the valley, but where would he go? Even if the other fox did not like him, if there was room enough in the forest for him too, maybe he could live here. He had lived in a forest just like this one, though it seemed many lifetimes ago.
It was a long time before he talked to her. There were many times they encountered each other, but she always ran. It was weeks before he could show her that he too was a fox, but even that did not calm her. His body was healing and some magic of the forest helped him to not look so haggard, not so sad. It was only when he had shown himself to not be hostile over a period of months that she did not flee his presence and finally talked to him. That day was a turning point of his life. He was both amazed at how much they had in common and he was ashamed at how much they differed. Both were true - he had spent a life just like hers when he had lived in the forest with the old man and Mingxia. But since he had left the forest, his life had become a vastly different monstrosity, something he was not proud of. He had gone astray of the things he had always wanted.
It did not happen immediately, but neither was it a surprise: Fei Zhang fell in love with her. To say that the love of animal spirits and men is the same is foolish, but love is the only word equipped to talk about such a deep partnership without selling it short. Together the two of them lived in the forest together. The years passed, but Fei Zhang did not know them and he did not count them, only each day as it began and ended, only the seasons as they changed. He felt he had been given a second chance on an old life, a second chance to reverse a bad decision. He realized that he and Mingxia should have stayed in that old forest, and so he knew that he and the white fox should stay in this new one.
Unfortunately, this time the decision was not so simple. The outside world intruded where it was not welcome. Wounded and bleeding, two mouse spirits came to the forest. Fei Zhang recognized one of them - when the Thousand Hands had split, this mouse had chosen to leave the group and follow the path of hiding. While initially afraid of Fei Zhang, the mouse soon understood that Fei Zhang had abandoned the Thousand Hands as well and seen their mistake. As they allowed Fei Zhang and the white fox to tend to their wounds, the mouse and his wife told of the outside world. They had bad tidings: fire was coming. In the years since Fei Zhang's fall, the Thousand Hands had changed. No longer an organization of outright war, they had become more subtle. Instead of defeating their enemies with weapons and horses, now they used assassins. Rather than make themselves known as a target, now they were in the shadows, feared and barely understood by others. As manipulators, the Thousand Hands of Fire seemed more deadly than before.
And this was also why the mouse spirits were running. The targets of the Thousand Hands had also changed. Now that they manipulated, humans were not their primary threat. They owned those humans, retribution theirs to mete out as needed. Now the Thousand Hands focused on another threat: those they called traitors. All animal spirits who were not with them were traitors. Pacifists, deserters, those that disagreed, those they had respectfully allowed to depart the Thousand Hands at the schism - these were all traitors and were to be purged. The new head of the Thousand Hands, Mingxia, demanded it. The animal spirits not with them were sentenced to death.
The two mice spirits moved on, but Fei Zhang was troubled. The mice had said the Thousand Hands were coming this way on their purge. They were in danger. Neither he nor the white fox spirit would ever submit to the Thousand Hands.
He also felt responsible for the change in the Thousand Hands. Mingxia had shifted from killing intolerant humans to purging all animal spirits that didn't agree with the group. That had to be due to his conflict with her on the ridge. Fei Zhang didn't know if Mingxia knew he was alive, but if she found him in this forest with
the white fox, her rage would know no bounds. It wasn't just Fei Zhang's life in danger, but the white fox's too.
It took some time, but he convinced the white fox to leave the forest with him. Digging up his spear and taking on human forms full time, they traveled east to the sea. In the most densely populated human cities, they hid themselves. The white fox was now his wife, known as Mei to humans. She had agreed to be with him, but she never got used to human civilization: the smell and the noise, the endless crush of people. But Fei Zhang, now known as Zhong, knew that populated areas would hide them better. It would be so much harder for the Thousand Hands to find them there, and the organization's influence was not strong on the coast.
For many years, the two lived in the city, finding joy in their lives where they could, but always looking over their shoulders. They saw empires come and go, the rise and fall of new governments. They had also seen the Thousand Hands get their claws into every new system of power, using the organization's unique abilities to manipulate and control. But even through all that time, the Thousand Hands did not find Zhong or his wife.
But then a new purge crossed the country. It seemed like all the others, but this one was different.
One day Zhong's quiet shop had a new visitor. There was something familiar in this man's presence. A walking staff and a rucksack hung over the visitor's shoulder. But when he took off his hat, Zhong knew immediately who he was: the old man from the forest.
"You!" said Zhong. "Where have you been?"
The old man gave a wan smile. His hair was different, his mustache trimmed, but otherwise he appeared to not have aged a day, neither looking old nor young. But to Wong he was always the old man. "Wherever the way had taken me."
"You left us!" said Zhong, surprised at the old hurt in his own voice.
"It was time," said the old man.
"It was time? What kind of reason is that? We loved you! You were our friend, our mentor! You abandoned us and all you can say is that it was time?"
"The way was pulling me and you two were ready," said the man. "It was time for you two to choose your lives. It was my role to watch."
"Watch? Watch who - us? Were we some game? Some test for you?"
The man shook his head. "Nothing like that! I love you two like children! But even children must be able to grow up and make their own choices."
"Our own choices?" said Zhong with tears in his eyes. "My own choices have created horrible things! Her choices still account of the deaths of thousands, if not countless more!"
"But they were your choices to make," said the man sadly. "I could not take that from you. The gift was given freely."
"I would have been happy if you had taken it from me! I would not have all this blood on my hands!"
"The past cannot be changed," said the old man. "But the future can still be shaped. Some new choices can make up for the old."
"What do you mean?"
"This is a time of upheaval," said the old man. "A hundred flowers were encouraged to bloom, and now they are getting sheared from their stems. Death is in the air for many. The fire is set to race across this land again. She is coming here. Her spies have alerted them to many animal spirits in this city. Another purge is coming and this time you will be found."
Zhong paled. "We... we have to get out of here!"
"That's one choice," said the man. "You can run. But the Thousand Hands have far more power in this age. Their reach is massive. If you run, you will need to cross the world to hide. There is a power in a far off city that could hide you, but you'd only be hiding, waiting to be found again. If this is your decision, look for a place known as Avalon. But that's only one choice. There are others."
"What are you getting at?" said Zhong with a cock of his head.
"Another choice: you stop running. Face your past head on. She rules the Thousand Hands, but you are one of the few she'd listen to. You're perhaps one of the only ones who could stop her. If you take control of the Thousand Hands from her, you could stop all this. You can stop the blood and fire."
"Are you crazy? I can't do that!" said Zhong. "There's no way I could stop her! She hates me! I don't even know if I could fight her!"
"Doubt is another choice," said the man with a shrug.
"Why don't you do it? If it's so important, why me? You surely are far more powerful than us both!"
"I am not involved," said the man.
"Not involved? It is you two who gave us this gift! Take it back! Take it back from both of us! End this!"
The man shook his head. "My warning is delivered. I love you both like children. But these choices you make on your own." The man put his hat on and turned to leave the shop.
"Where are you going? Come back!" shouted Zhong.
The man paused for just a moment. "I go wherever the way takes me." Then he stepped out into the street, disappearing into the years.
After the man left, Zhong sat in his shop for a while. Then he found his wife, Mei.
"What is it, Husband?"
"We're leaving China," he said. There was further discussion, but she knew from the expression on his face the moment he said it that the decision had already been made, only the details to be discussed.
Zhong and Mei disappeared during the night, getting on a boat that took them away from the mainland. Keeping their cover low, they travelled across the world to America. It was there that they first heard the familiar name from the old man: Avalon. Remembering the advice, they travelled to the town known as New Avalon and settled there.
But they had left their homeland behind and so they left their old lives with it. Better to hide as new people. They let go of their old identities. Mei became Meilin and Zhong became Wong. And there they lived and waited... until they were found again.
Dark Alleys Make For the Most Interesting Conversations
"That's... that's quite a story," said Dane, taking another sip of his third Irish Coffee. After years of never even having heard of them, he had decided in just over twenty-four hours that he loved them more than nearly anything besides a damn fine cup of actual unadulterated coffee. The rush of caffeine tempered the buzz of alcohol, making him feel as excited and immortal as that first cup of black coffee in the morning, yet loose and easy as after a beer. This was exactly how he wanted to feel all the time and probably a big red flag for possible alcoholism. Once the first arrived from the bartender, Dane had made sure she kept them coming throughout Wong's story.
"That's why I've been running," said Wong, running his hands through his hair. "That's why I've been hiding. But despite the decades and my best efforts, they've still found me even in Avalon. And whether she knew it before, Mingxia knows I am alive now. If she ever discovered Meilin's existence..."
"Then your wife would be in terrible danger," agreed Dane.
Wong nodded. "It has been a long time, but I still have the blood of many on my hands. If I meet a violent end, it is just the fate of a once-violent man. It is the consequence of my life and the poor choices I have made. But Meilin is innocent... she has always been innocent. I cannot let anything happen to her."
"We don't want anything to happen to you either," said Dane. "Not me, not Meilin, not any of us."
"I don't think that option exists anymore," said Wong. "I'm pretty sure my fate has been decided. But maybe I can protect her... and the rest of you all."
"If it's that bad, just run!" said Dane. "I'm on the case and seeing what I can do to help, but if the immediate danger is so great, run! Take Meilin and leave town! I'll handle it here!"
Wong shook his head sadly. "It's too late. This city no longer hides us. Mingxia has my scent and an army of magicians to track me. If I run, she will follow. If I bring Meilin, I put her in danger. And if I run alone, her spies will eventually discover that I had a wife as they trace my trail. No. If I offer myself to them, this will end, and Meilin will be protected."
"That's suicide!" said Dane.
"That's what I need to do to protect my wife,"
said Wong. "Let's be honest, my time is done. All my responsibilities are in the past. It's been a good life, but I've been living on borrowed time since I fell off that cliff. The only thing that matters to me, my only remaining responsibility, is to Meilin. If I can give my life to protect her, the remainder of my life will be well spent."
"I don't get it, why did you even bring me here?" said Dane in frustration. "You've already made your decision and you don't seem to want to be talked out of it! Why have you spent the time to tell me this?"
"I..." started Wong, but then stopped. His face nervously wavered between smile and frown, embarrassment and worry on his features. "I'll admit it. I'm afraid. I know what I need to do, but I'm afraid to do it. Real courageous, right? Wong, Fei Zhang, leader of armies, afraid to face his responsibilities. Even still, I'm scared. But then I thought of you. You're the most fearless guy I know. I thought you could help. Help steel my nerves to go do it."
"What I can help you do is find a better solution for this!" said Dane. "This is not the answer!"
Wong shook his head. "I see no other."
"Then let me come with you!" said Dane. "I'll find something else! I know how to defeat villains!"
"I fear that I am as big a villain as them," said Wong glumly. "I just have been in retirement. I am no hero nor innocent that should be saved. No good person should endanger themselves on my account. My death would be justice."
"And yet you turned away from that and have done only good things for, what, decades? Centuries? You're not a villain! Your fate is not sealed! Not while I'm your friend!"
"Dane, I appreciate the support, but..."
"Nonsense! We're going to go figure this out!" said Dane standing up. "First step, go to the villain's lair!"
"What? I thought you didn't agree I should turn myself in," said Wong.
"Right, but first we need to lull them into a false sense of security! So we just need them to think you're turning yourself in!"
Burning Monday: (Dane Monday 2) Page 22