“Had in your possession,” Papa said coolly.
Mother’s gaze flew to him.
“Sit,” he said, gesturing her to the chaise lounge, “and I will enlighten you on how things are to be from now on.”
“I absolutely will not.”
Papa did not move, his arm still extended invitingly toward the sitting area.
“Perhaps you should do as Papa says.” Though my legs shook beneath me, it was not from fear but from the release of a great weight being lifted off me. “I believe it would be the wisest choice for all involved.”
Mother crossed her arms defiantly.
“Sit!” Papa commanded, his volume rising just enough to make Mother startle. With lifted chin, she moved past Papa, lowering herself onto the lounge without a word.
Papa gave a small shake of his head at her obstinance before turning to me. “Be safe, my darling.”
“Thank you, Papa.” I looked to Mother, whose eyes were fixed on the hearth. “Farewell, Mother.”
She did not turn around, nor did she speak.
Yet, for the first time in years, I did not care what she thought. With a lightened step, I moved to the door. “Oh, and Papa?”
He had just settled in the chair across from Mother. “What is it, Arabella?”
“Will you have Leah sent to me as soon as it can be arranged?”
“Of course.”
Mother did not move. “And where is it your maid should be sent?” she asked me, unable to conceal the curiosity in her voice.
“Fairhaven, of course.”
Mother spun in her seat, her look of utter shock sending a satisfied smile to my lips, and I hurried from the room.
Chapter Twenty-Five
“This is it.” My words seemed to blow past me as I slowed my horse to a trot, taking in the familiar sight of Fairhaven. My back ached from the hours atop the horse, though I was relieved it hadn’t taken quite as long as I had thought it might. Not even three hours with one break in between to have the horses tended to.
“We arrived just in time, miss.” Brown glanced upward at the sky. “An hour later and it’d be gettin’ dark.”
I smiled. “Yes. Now help me down from this cursed creature.”
The wrinkles around Brown’s aged eyes deepened with his chuckle, and he dismounted, moving to assist me.
When my feet were again on solid ground, I placed a hand on the horse’s sweat-soaked neck. “I do believe I may grow to like you yet.”
He whinnied, and I handed the reins to Brown. “You can walk them back to the stables. I’m certain the Brundages won’t mind.”
He nodded and led the horses in the direction I’d gestured.
My heart was thudding in my chest, and I stopped on the top step to draw in a calming breath. I looked down at my dusty, wrinkled day dress and wished I’d had the patience to have changed into my traveling dress. After shaking my skirts and running my hands through my curls—which had been dried by the wind into a mess of tangles—I lifted a hand and rested it on the knocker. “I can do this,” I repeated under my breath, clenching the heavy, circular handle.
But could I? What if Augustus couldn’t forgive me? Or Ruth? Was it worth the risk if they would simply tell me to leave? I dropped my hand, and the metal knocker gave a muted clank.
The door creaked open, and the butler’s gaze locked on me, his eyes widening. “Miss Godwin?”
My apprehension grew. If he was this shocked to see me, I wondered what welcome I would receive from the others. “Hello, Branson. Is Mr. Brundage at home?” I needed to tell him of Mrs. Seton’s letter to Papa. Then I would know how to proceed with Ruth.
He stepped back and opened the door to let me in. “He is. If you’ll wait here.”
I was listening to his fading footsteps when Ruth’s excited voice floated out the open drawing room door. “And to think I hadn’t realized they’d grown to love one another.”
Unable to resist my curiosity, I tiptoed closer, peeking inside.
Ruth and Sarah giggled, their backs to me and their attention out the drawing room window. Mrs. Brundage stood a few steps behind them, facing the same direction.
“Girls, we really should give them privacy.” Mrs. Brundage peered over their shoulders, with no apparent determination to heed her own advice.
I thought to announce myself, but my interest to discover who they were urged me forward.
Ruth shook her head. “I can hardly believe it. Mr. Treynor will tease me mercilessly when he discovers he has won our wager. I was so adamant that there would not be a marriage this summer.”
My feet grew heavy beneath me, and it was then I caught sight of who they were observing. Not twenty paces from the window Miss Whitmore and Augustus were locked in an embrace. I blinked, but they were still there. I could not convince my eyes to look away, my heart breaking with every lingering moment they spent in one another’s arms. Suddenly, it felt as though I was living my nightmare; though Augustus stood right there outside the window, he would never come. Not for me. I would wait forever.
My legs swayed beneath me, and I reached out a hand to steady myself on a nearby chair. But why should I be surprised? I had done this. I had told Augustus to offer for Miss Whitmore. Was I cursed to ruin everything?
“Bella?” I lifted my gaze to find Ruth watching me with an awestruck expression. “What are you doing here?”
Sarah and Mrs. Brundage spun toward me.
I tried to force the rehearsed words from my mouth. Any words. “I … I came to beg your forgiveness.”
Ruth’s head tilted to one side, and she raised an eyebrow. “You came all the way here from Branbury for that? Could you not have written with an apology?”
I drew in a breath, reminding myself that Augustus was not the only reason I had come. Ruth was my dearest friend, and I could not lose her. “I needed to tell you, in person, how sorry I am. I should never have shared the untruth about your inheritance. And I certainly should not have encouraged you toward a match whose only observable merits were a handsome face and good connections. You deserve someone infinitely better than that wretched man who does not even warrant having his name uttered.”
The corner of Ruth’s lips twitched, giving me hope.
“I have been so foolish. Could you ever forgive me?”
Ruth pursed her lips before a smile lit her face. “Of course I shall. I cannot stay angry at you. And I do not blame you for what happened. You offered me sound advice countless times, and I did not heed you. I only hope I’ve learned from my errors, for I know Augustus cannot always be there to stop every”—Ruth quirked her head—“what did he call Mr. Green again?”
“Scoundrel?”
“Not that one.”
“Liar?”
Ruth shook her head again.
“Degenerate?”
“That’s it.” Ruth smiled. “Degenerate. Augustus cannot be there to stop every degenerate I encounter. Though I’m glad he managed to stop this one before anything scandalous happened.”
Relief flooded over me at her light-hearted confirmation that nothing too detrimental had occurred. “As am I.”
Mrs. Brundage and Sarah both nodded in agreement, and I turned to them. “I also need to apologize to you both. I gave you false hope, placed you in an uncomfortable situation, and left after breaking my agreement to Augustus. But I need you to know that I should have very much adored being a part of this family.”
Sarah offered a timid smile. “I should have liked that also.”
Mrs. Brundage nodded. “We all would have.”
“Miss Whitmore will be an exceptional addition. Far better than I ever could have been.” I glanced out the window, but the happy couple was no longer in sight. My heart began racing, and I quickly moved forward, giving Mrs. Brundage and Sarah a hug before stopping in front of Ruth. “How dear you are to me. I hope you know that.”
She wrapped her arms around me so tightly, I never wanted to leave. But I needed to before I
would be forced to face Augustus in my disappointment. My strength was spent. I could not bear it. I would write to him and tell him of Papa’s revelation. I pulled back from Ruth, tears threatening to fall. “I shall be in touch.”
Ruth gave a pout. “You are leaving already? But you have just arrived.”
“I know. But I cannot stay longer.” I swallowed, taking a few steps away. “I only came to apologize to all of you, and now I must be on my way.”
“That is the only reason you came all this way?” Augustus’s voice came from behind.
I did not turn around. I could not bear to look at him and remember the embrace he had just shared with Miss Whitmore, nor the whispers of their engagement I had heard. Instead, I glanced to the side, my gaze fixed on the ground. “I did wish to speak to you, but it seems I have come at an inconvenient time. I can pen you a letter instead.”
“I’d prefer to hear what you have to say in person.”
Mrs. Brundage shooed Ruth and Sarah out the door. “We will let the two of you speak in private.”
Realizing it would be ridiculous to continue facing an empty room, I slowly turned toward him. Augustus leaned against the doorframe, his wary eyes on me. “What is it you wish to discuss?”
I glanced behind him, wondering if Miss Whitmore had returned home to announce their betrothal to her soon-to-be delighted mother. Had their embrace been one of farewell or would she be joining him here momentarily? “Are you certain I am not imposing on you?”
He hesitated, then pushed himself off the wall and started toward me. “I’m not certain. But I’ll let you know if that changes.”
I gestured behind him with my chin. “You may want to shut the door.”
He paused, glancing behind him. “And why is that?”
I lowered my voice. “Ruth should not overhear us.”
After a moment’s hesitation, he moved to the door and closed it. “Better?”
I nodded.
“Now what is it that has you acting so mysteriously?”
“I know what happened to Ruth’s parents.”
His eyes narrowed. “What do you mean, you know?”
I retrieved the letter from the reticule I clutched and held it out to him. “Read that.”
His gaze darted from the letter to me and back again before he carefully took hold of it, avoiding contact with my hand. He unfolded it, and I watched as his eyes moved over the words, his brow drawn low. When he finished, he looked at me. “Where did you get this?”
“It was sent to my father the day your aunt died, only my mother got hold of it first. She used it to coerce him into abiding by her demands, threatening to reveal the truth if he did not comply. One of the things she demanded was keeping Ruth and you from me. In return, Mother would not hand over the letter to the authorities, ensuring your aunt was not disinterred and subjected to the standard self-murder burial. The very idea of someone Papa loved so dearly enduring such an awful fate was too much. He could not oppose Mother.”
Augustus skimmed the letter again.
“I only ask that if you decide to use it to substantiate Ruth’s case, then you say it was found at Blacksley when you were going through papers. Papa said withholding evidence can be punishable by hanging, and though you may think my mother or even my father deserves such a fate, I beseech you to refrain from retribution. Though I understand ultimately it is up to you what you do with it, as well as whether or not you will tell Ruth.”
Augustus drew in a long breath, releasing it in a quick puff. “There was a part of me that always wondered if this was the truth of it.” He lifted the letter and gave it a slow shake. “The day of their deaths, I noticed Aunt Susan’s lingering gaze on Ruth time and time again. There was so much love in her eyes … and there was sorrow.” He dropped his head, his thumb and forefinger settling on the bridge of his nose.
Not certain how to comfort him in his grief, or if it was my place to do so at all, I wrapped my arms around my midsection and waited patiently.
“Forgive me.” Augustus’s head lifted a touch, though his focus remained on the letter. “And what would you do with this evidence?”
“I thought about it some on my journey from Branbury, and I simply do not know. On one hand, it could right the injustice of Ruth losing her inheritance.”
“But?”
“On the other hand, I cannot help but think of the damage it would cause Ruth. It would break her heart and force her to grieve a second time. And the grief would be a crushing thing to bear, especially if it came to be known publicly.” I paused, the fast pace of my heart reverberating through me. “I’m now certain all the money and esteem in the world cannot compensate for a broken heart.” A truth I had learned too late.
Augustus’s discerning eyes moved across my face, and he dropped the letter to his side. “I cannot abide the thought of telling her, of having her discover such a thing after so long. Perhaps someday, when she is ready, but not yet. Besides, the case has already been ruled on, and I’m not certain if we could attempt another appeal.” He hesitated. “Ruth did not, in actuality, lose everything. The Court rewarded Ruth with her mother’s dowry as well as the money that had been set aside for her own dowry. She is also allowed her parents’ and her own personal items that have remained at Blacksley all these years.”
The shock I felt at hearing the news was quickly replaced with relief for Ruth. “I am so very glad to hear that.”
He rubbed at his jaw. “I am sorry I did not tell you. I simply did not want Mr. Green to discover that Ruth’s fortune could very well have paid off his debts.”
The mention of Mr. Green and Augustus’s underlying message—I was not someone he could confide in—pricked me. “I am sorry that I behaved in a way that betrayed your trust.”
He did not refute my claim.
I looked back to the letter at his side, and I was suddenly eager to be on my way. “If you could keep that somewhere safe, I would greatly appreciate it. It is one of the protections to keep my mother from telling Ruth.”
Augustus quirked a brow.
“As I was leaving, Papa was informing Mother that if she attempts to threaten me or Ruth again, he shall tell the authorities of your aunt’s letter and their role in withholding it. It is only a ploy, of course, Papa would not really do so and certainly not without your agreement.”
Augustus’s brows lifted, and he looked as though he was attempting to make sense of it all. After a moment, he slipped the letter into his waistcoat pocket and gave a resolute nod. “I shall keep it safe.”
“Thank you.” We stood in awkward silence. “I’d best be on my way.”
Augustus straightened. “Yes. I suppose you should.”
Though I felt like weeping, I managed a strained smile. “And congratulations on the upcoming wedding.” Unable to endure his confirmation, I ducked my head and stepped past him toward the door.
“Bella?”
I glanced over my shoulder to find a small lift on one side of his lips. “Yes?”
“Branson mentioned you arrived on horseback.”
“I did.”
Augustus took a step toward me, making my heart patter recklessly. “I thought you no longer rode horses.”
“I don’t … well, I did, but I …” My words trailed off as he took another step closer, making my heart lift in empty anticipation. What was he playing at?
“So, you rode a horse all the way here from Branbury?”
I knew I should take a step away from him, but I couldn’t. “Yes.”
“What I can’t understand is why a lady—one who declares she has not ridden in over eight years and does not care for riding—suddenly feels it a necessity to get on a horse and ride for over two hours.”
“Our carriage was being repaired. It was the only way to get here.”
Augustus nodded, his gaze moving to the window. “And where do you expect to stay tonight? Certainly you will not ride to Branbury in the darkness.”
I lifted my c
hin. “I am not returning to Branbury. I will likely stay at a nearby inn or go to my father’s cousins’ house. Mr. Leavitt told me I’d always be welcome.”
Disbelief touched his expression. “You are truly not returning to Branbury?”
I shook my head, wondering whether he felt remorse for so quickly asking for Miss Whitmore’s hand. No. I would not allow such thoughts. I was determined to change.
“And why would you not stay here, then? With us?”
“I do not wish to impose, nor do I wish to ruin anything between you and Miss Whitmore.”
His brow quirked upward.
“When I first arrived, I saw you out the window, embracing. And I overheard Ruth mention the wedding.”
Augustus nodded, denying nothing.
“So that is why I cannot stay. It seems the only thing I’m really good for is causing damage in my wake.”
“You do excel at it.” A smile warmed his face, and my heart sank further. It would not be for much longer that he could offer me such smiles. “May I show you something before you go?”
I glanced out at the late afternoon light, certain I should be on my way now that I would be required to seek lodging. But I did not wish to disappoint him again. A brief observation of whatever it was he wished to show me was the least I could do. “I suppose, if we are quick about it.”
He extended his arm to me and, with a shaky hand, I took hold of it.
“Are you two finished?” Ruth asked, as we stepped into the entry hall.
“Not quite.” Augustus led me forward, opening the front door. “We will be back shortly.”
All three women were smiling, and Augustus closed the door behind us.
We made our way to the back of the house and started toward the rose garden. Augustus walked so swiftly, I was barely managing to keep up with his long strides. “Forgive my haste. Are you managing well?” He led us through the back of the garden onto the small walking path we’d taken to the holloway.
“Yes. But could I ask where we are going?”
“Only a little further, I’m nearly certain of it.”
I tightened my grip on his arm. “You don’t know where we are going?”
A Well-Trained Lady (Seasons of Change Book 4) Page 29