by Ella Miles
I feel myself going down when Sean catches me.
“Thank you,” I say weakly.
“You should go training with me sometime. Build up some strength in your legs.”
“It’s not—”
Sean grabs my chin and kisses me, stopping me from thinking. I don’t know how he does it, but when he kisses me, it’s like he transfers some of his confidence into me. The kiss isn’t meant to be loving or sexual. It’s a confidence boost.
When Sean pulls away, he stares at me with a serious expression. I was expecting his sexy grin or a smirk to be smeared on his face because he knows full well that his kiss affected me. But it’s not there.
I narrow my eyes as I study him and try to understand what he is feeling, but I can’t. I don’t know him well enough, and it’s clear that he doesn’t let anyone in.
So, I turn my attention away from Sean and start walking into the apartment building with his hand on the small of my back, ensuring that I’m not going to fall again. But I don’t want his hand on me. I don’t want his help. I want to do this on my own. So, I walk faster until Sean is no longer keeping up with me. I automatically go to the stairs instead of the elevator.
“You know this place has an actual functioning elevator, like a normal apartment should?” Sean says.
I pause at the entrance to the stairwell and turn to look at Sean. He’s standing with his hands in the pockets of his gray suit pants. He looks so perfect, beautiful. He looks like a successful adult who knows what he wants in his life. Meanwhile, I’m wearing pajama pants, a sweatshirt, and the coat Sean got me. I’m a mess while he is perfectly put together.
“You have a problem with my apartment? Then, pay me more. It’s the best I can afford.”
One of Sean’s eyebrows rises.
“I’m taking the stairs. I like the stairs. I don’t like elevators,” I say.
Then, I realize that I might have made a mistake because Sean’s face lights up at that. He thinks he knows some deep, dark secret about me, but he doesn’t. I don’t like elevators. I like the burn and the time to think that climbing the stairs offers better than the silence and awkwardness that an elevator provides. That’s it.
I start running up the stairs, but I don’t hear Sean behind me. I finally make it to Owen’s floor, and I’m completely out of breath, but it feels good. I walk out of the stairwell and down the hallway toward Owen’s apartment when I see Sean leaning against the wall with a smirk on his face. I stop, completely out of breath, in front of him.
Sean leans down to my ear and says, “I like elevators better. Why waste energy on anything you don’t need to? I’d rather reserve my energy for other more enjoyable things.”
A shiver runs up and down my spine. I walk past Sean, ignoring his smirk and comment. I walk up to Owen’s apartment door and knock loudly. I ignore what Sean is doing to my heart. I can’t do this if I’m thinking about Sean.
I don’t give Owen much time to come to the door before I start knocking loudly again, and this time, when I start, I can’t stop. I knock on the door the same way that others might punch a pillow. It’s a way to get my frustration and anger out. But, instead of making me feel weaker, the pounding on the door makes me feel stronger than ever.
I feel myself punching air as the door swings open, and Owen stands in the doorway, looking at me.
“I want my cat and stuff back,” I say before Owen has a chance to say anything.
I look him up and down while I wait for him to speak to me. I no longer feel embarrassed by how I look because Owen looks worse. It’s clear he just woke up, and while I have the excuse of being sick with a migraine, Owen just looks hungover and pathetic.
Owen rubs his head, like my voice was too loud for him. “What are you doing here, Olive? We already had this conversation.”
“We are going to have it again and again until I get what I need, Owen.”
“What you need? What about what I need, Olive? You can’t just break up with a man over a misunderstanding, Olive. That’s not fair!”
I laugh. “Fair? You want to talk fair? How about how, in our entire year together, you never once treated me well? We did everything your way, never mine. How fair is that? I’m not sorry that I broke up with you, Owen. I don’t have to have a fair reason or any reason to break up with you. I broke up with you. Find someone else to fuck or not. I don’t care. But, most importantly, give me back my cat!”
My face is red, and I’m completely out of breath. But my body is steady. I don’t feel dizzy anymore. I don’t feel like I’m about to faint or fall over. I feel strong.
I search Owen’s eyes, but I know that he is so much of a dick that he isn’t ever going to give in to me. And I know, if I involve the police, I’m going to lose. I only see one option left at getting my cat back. So, I take it.
I run as hard as I can, trying to fit between the tiny gap that Owen has left between his body and the opening to his apartment. I run and think that I’ve made it inside when I feel his hands come around me, pushing me back. His hands go around my neck as he pushes me back out of his apartment, and his eyes are dark with rage. I’ve never seen Owen so pissed off before. Not even when he was drunk and thrown out of a bar.
“You don’t get to do this to me, bitch. I propose, and you marry me. I didn’t throw the last year away on you to have you say no. Do you understand me?” Owen asks, his hands still firmly around my neck.
He isn’t really trying to choke me, more just to contain me.
I kick him hard in the balls, and his hands immediately let go of my neck. I feel Sean walk up behind me. I look up at Sean and see an even darker rage in his eyes as he peers down at Owen.
“You’re lucky that Olive got to you before I could. If you ever touch her again, I will tear your body into pieces before burying each body part on a different continent to make sure you are never found or thought of ever again,” Sean says, his voice full of fury.
I look up at him, but his eyes don’t soften.
“Let’s get your stuff, Olive, and then get out of here,” Sean says, guiding me away from where Owen is crumpled on the floor.
I step back inside Owen’s apartment, and my heart is pounding so fast that I can’t even think.
“Olive, where is your stuff?” Sean asks.
“Bedroom. The cat is probably also under the bed.”
Sean grabs my hand and leads me that way as Owen stumbles back into the apartment. Sean pulls me into the bedroom and then locks the door behind us. He stops and strokes my face as I look up at him.
“Are you okay?” I ask, looking at the anger still in his eyes, afraid he is going to go kill Owen if we don’t get out of here soon.
He laughs gently. “I should be asking you that.”
I smile weakly. “I’m fine because of you.”
He shakes his head. “No. You’re more than fine because of you.”
His lips gently find mine again, like he’s afraid to roughly touch me because he might break me.
“You can kiss me harder than that. I won’t break,” I say.
He takes a deep breath. “I know. You’re stronger than I ever thought possible. And you’ve learned something.”
I cock my head to one side. “What?”
“You said you weren’t sorry.”
I grin widely. “Well, I’m not, and he needed to know that. We should get my stuff and get out of here.”
I turn and head toward the closet to grab the couple of items that I have stored there when Sean grabs my hand and pulls me back to him.
“No, I think we have more important things to do first.”
His lips crash down on mine, and his tongue pushes into my mouth. My whole body comes alive again when he kisses me. It’s a strange feeling that I thought I would never feel again. I thought we were done after the last time. Evidently, Sean has changed his mind. And I’m more than happy to go along with his new plan until he pushes me back onto Owen’s bed.
“No! We can�
��t,” I whisper as my eyes grow large.
Sean removes his suit jacket and then slowly undoes the buttons on his shirt. “I want you, Olive. Watching you put Owen in his place was a major turn-on.”
Sean removes his shirt, and all I can think about is how I want to feel his hard body on mine again.
“What better way to get back at Owen than by fucking in his bed?” Sean asks, his eyes full of hunger and need.
It doesn’t take any convincing for me to decide that I want him to fuck me on Owen’s bed.
“Is that what you want, Olive? For me to fuck you?”
I nod as Sean undoes the buttons on my coat and pushes it off.
“You want me to touch you like he never did?”
I nod as Sean undoes the button and zipper on his pants.
“You want me to make you scream like Owen never could?”
“Yes,” I breathe.
Sean takes his cock out of his pants and holds it in his hand. He pulls a condom out of his back pocket and slips it on while he stares at me the whole time.
Sean grabs my pajama pants and pulls them down hard, and I squeal just a little bit. And then I bite my lip when I realize I was far too loud for what we are about to do.
“Don’t bite your lip. I want to hear every dirty moan.”
He grabs my legs and spreads them wide. He buries his face between them. His tongue makes me forget about how angry I was just a second ago. I try to keep my senses about me to remain quiet because, even now, I don’t want to get hurt. I don’t want to become a monster, and that’s what I’ll feel like if I scream and make what we’re doing in Owen’s bed apparent.
But that’s not an option.
Sean’s tongue is moving faster than I ever remember him moving it before. He slides a finger into my pussy and then another and another, stretching me wide, while his other hand slips under my top until it finds my nipple, flicking across it.
The sensation is too much for me to contain, so I scream, “Fuck, more!”
But Sean stops as soon as I say more. “You don’t get to come without me inside you. He needs to know exactly what I can do to you.”
Sean pushes his cock inside me, and I grab his face, meeting his lips to try to keep my moaning at bay. But Sean only kisses me once on the lips, and then his lips move to my neck. His lips kiss up and down my neck and then nibble on my ear as he continues to affect me.
“I want to hear you scream my name.”
He thrusts harder, fucking me harder and harder into the bed. I’ve never been fucked this hard or this fast before in my life, but it makes me want to have sex like this again and again. Harder, faster, like animals.
“Scream my name, Olive,” Sean says again.
He fucks me harder and faster, to a level that I didn’t know existed, until I can barely breathe or think. Until all I can do is scream.
“Sean!” I scream as I come, clawing my nails into his back.
He continues to fuck me hard and fast, each thrust harder, until he thrusts one last time, coming inside me with a force I’ve never felt before.
Just as I’m about to take a breath, I hear a loud pop, and then the bed collapses to the floor. I scream again as Sean’s arms protectively wrap around me as we fall to the floor.
I look up at Sean, and we both laugh at the bed that is now in a collapsed mess on the floor.
“Milo!” I say, looking around for my cat, hoping to God that he wasn’t under the bed in his usual hiding place.
Sean rolls off me and begins cleaning himself up while I pull my pants up. I run, searching around the room for my cat. I open the closet door and find him trapped inside, lying in the corner of the closet. I smile as I pick him up and cuddle him in my arms. He meows and nuzzles his head up against my face, happy to see me.
I look back at Sean as he pulls his pants back up. I just had him, but I want him again. Now. I take a deep breath, hoping that feeling will pass, but it only intensifies as I look at him. My headache is gone, and I feel alive for the first time since he last fucked me. He’s turned me into a sex-craving lunatic.
But it’s not just the sex that I want. I want him. I want the guy who, even while he was trying to keep his distance, still took care of me. If he can do that while pretending not to care, I want to know what it’s like for him to truly care about somebody.
Damn it, what has he done to me?
13
Sean
What the fuck have I done?
I keep can’t keep having sex with Olive. I’ll ruin her. Because I can never love her. Not when my heart is already taken. And she needs someone to love her.
But I can’t seem to stay away from her. The first time was for fun and was harmless, but this time was a relapse, one that I can never repeat again, no matter the fact that I so desperately want to.
“Do you have everything?” I ask Olive, who is firmly clutching her cat with a large smile on her face.
“Just one second,” she says as she searches through the closet and finds a couple of items of clothing. She finds a small bag in the closet and puts all the items into it. Then, she picks up her coat, putting it on as she stares at the broken bed. “I feel kind of bad about the bed,” she says, looking at it and then back at me.
I pick up my jacket and put it on. Then, I dig into my wallet. I pull out several hundreds and throw them onto the bed. “There. Now, he can buy a new one,” I say.
She stares at the hundred-dollar bills, and I know she wants to ask about my job again, but she doesn’t. Instead, she just puts the bag with her things over her shoulder and then picks up her cat again. She deliberately walks toward the door and opens it. Owen stands in the doorway, glaring at her.
I know that she didn’t hear Owen screaming and pounding on the door when I was fucking her. She was too much in her own world, oblivious to anything else other than me. And that’s how I wanted it.
Owen pushes past Olive and into the bedroom. His eyes grow wide as he sees the state of his bed. “What the fuck did you do to my bed?” Owen shouts at Olive.
“We fucked. He made me come and scream like you never could.” Olive cocks her head to one side with a sly smile on her face. “But then I’m sure you heard that part.”
Owen takes a step toward Olive, and I can’t stand the thought of him going near her again, so I step in front of him, stopping him from moving any closer to her.
“Don’t you dare touch her,” I say.
“I should call the police. This is breaking and entering. And, now, you can add damaged property to that list of laws you broke,” Owen says.
I take a step toward him so that he can feel how much stronger I am when I stand over him. “Call the police. I dare you. It will be your word against ours. And I’ll tell the police how much of a piece of shit you are to put your hands on a woman like that.”
Owen steps back, but he doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t argue with me, but I’m still not sure he gets it.
“Leave Olive the hell alone. Don’t call her. Don’t try to contact her. Do you understand?”
Owen’s eyes dart from Olive’s and then back to mine before he nods slowly.
I walk to Olive, putting my hand on the small of her back and guiding her to the front door of the apartment. I stop for just a second and turn to Owen who has started following us.
“There should be more than enough cash on your bed to cover the damages,” I say with a smirk before Olive and I leave.
“You have to promise me something, Olive,” I say as we walk down the hallway.
“What’s that?” she asks, snuggling with her kitty, only half-listening to me.
I stop her and force her to look up at me so that she can see how serious and important this is. She gives me her full attention when she sees the intensity in my eyes.
“You have to promise me that you will stay far away from him. Guys like Owen turn into crazy exes who do crazy things, and I just want you to be safe. So, promise me, you’ll stay away, and if
you do have to talk to him again, bring me.”
She laughs. “What happened to me being independent and strong and standing up for myself?” she asks.
“I already know that you can do that. You being safe is more important. I just need you to be safe,” I say, stroking her cheek.
“Okay, I promise,” she says, staring at me with eyes that show me how much she wants me.
“Take the elevator with me,” I say.
She cocks her head to one side and looks at me with narrowed eyes. “What? Why?”
“Just trust me.”
She bites her lip and then sighs, “Okay.”
I smile and grab her hand as we run down the hallway, toward the elevator. I know before we even reach the elevator how much of a mistake this is. I’m going to regret it as soon as it happens, but I don’t care. Right now, all I can do is think with my dick instead of my head.
I press the elevator button, and then we wait while Olive holds on to her cat, studying me like I’m going crazy.
The elevator door opens a second later, and I make my intentions very clear. I push Olive into the elevator. I take the cat out of her arms and place him on the ground along with the bag that she has been carrying over her shoulder. I kiss her like I’m desperate for her, like this is the last time I’ll ever be able to kiss her again. Because it just might be. Each time I kiss her or fuck her, it should be the last time, so that’s how I consider it—like it’s the last time.
My hand slips inside her pajama pants and panties until I find her spot between her folds that will make her forget about the fact that we’re riding down in an elevator and that anyone could step on at any moment and see my hand down her pants.
I lean back and click the button for the ground floor. Then, I whisper into her ear as my fingers rub over her clit, “You have until we get to the ground floor to come. But don’t worry, baby; I’ll make you come long before we get there.”
I watch as she sucks in a breath. Her cheeks flush pink, and she closes her eyes, trying to keep in the sudden sensation I’m causing inside her.