by A. J. Locke
“How long ago did your grandmother pass?”
“About eight years ago. From cancer.” I didn’t like to think about what my life was like after my grandmother died because I considered it my darkest period. I was old enough to be on my own, but not having the one person who had been a constant in my life since I was born was harder than I could bear so I slipped into that bad place people tend to go to when they feel like their lives are spiraling out of control.
“If you had met me back then I would have laughed in your face instead of trying to help you get your body back.”
“You mean you were worse than you are now?” he said.
I gave him another punch. “I was a mess, I did anything I could to try and forget that my grandmother died. I drank a lot, had shallow relationships with any man who winked at me over a beer bottle, and traveled all over the world spending the money she’d left me. But of course nothing worked.”
“So what made you stop?”
“I got tired of running,” I said softly. “No matter what I did, it didn’t change the fact that I was alone, and I had to start dealing with it. And one day when I finally decided it was time to pack up her things, I found a letter she had left me. She wrote about how her biggest fear was leaving me alone and how she hoped that with or without her I would do great things with my life and be happy. She didn’t want me to end up like my parents. After I read that letter I knew that I had been failing in what she had hoped for me. So I enrolled in college, dropped out twice, but eventually got things figured out.”
“And it’s made you the well rounded individual you are today,” Ethan said mischievously.
I poked him in the side.
“It sure has. Now, back to you. Will you see your parents?”
“Soon.”
“Same thing you always say.” I rolled my eyes. “But we can let that go for now. Did you feel any more ghosts lingering around today?”
“Nope. Did you do any investigating into Isabelle and how she ended up here?”
“I made a trip to the Rye’s house but they packed in a hurry and left last night. I also went to the hospital where she was staying, and I may have found something of interest there. Paperwork was put in to transfer her to another hospital but it was left unfinished. I think on purpose. It made me feel like someone other than the Ryes was involved in pulling this off.”
“Yeah, doesn’t seem like her parents would be able to do something so elaborate on their own.”
“Same thing I thought. There is something I want your help with though. Do you think you could hack into the hospital’s surveillance system? That way I’d be able to see who was going in and out of Isabelle’s room the night she left the hospital, which I’ve pinpointed was last Tuesday.”
Ethan’s eyes widened. “Hack into their surveillance system? What in the world makes you think I can do that?”
“Well, for starters, you’re a grade A nerd, and I was hoping you came programmed with that kind of knowledge.”
He scowled at me.
“Plus, you hacked my cable box to get all those movie and anime channels you wanted for free, and you said something about hacking that Playstation I bought you, so I was hoping security camera hacking would be up your alley too.”
“Well sorry to say, it’s not,” Ethan said. I hadn’t been a hundred percent certain it’d be something he could do, but there was a small part of me that thought he might. “That level of hacking is beyond my capabilities.”
“Ah crap.” I’d just have to figure out some other way to do it.
“I may not be able to do it…” Ethan said in a way that made me turn to him. He looked at me with a half smile. “But I may know someone who can.”
“Really?” I sat up straight and almost tossed a dozing Luna off my lap. I managed to snatch her back, and she rewarded my tussling with a finger nip.
“One of my friends knows someone who can do what you want to do,” Ethan said. “I know all the technical words put you to sleep, so let’s just say Carlos can do all sorts of illegal things involving technology.”
I rubbed my hands together. “I’m liking the sound of this.”
“Yeah, he even took me to the guy’s shop once because he wanted to…well, I guess it’s better if I don’t tell you what he wanted to do. But Carlos was able to get it done. I’m sure he’d be able to hack into a hospital’s surveillance system. I can tell you where to find him.”
“And I’ll head there first thing tomorrow.” I gave Ethan a quick hug. “I knew there was a reason I kept you around.”
“I thought it was for the cooking and to keep Luna alive,” Ethan said, smiling. “But apparently it’s for illegal hookups?”
“That’s the real way to my heart,” I said. “But the cooking is too, when you don’t burn it.” Just then the bell rang, and I knew it had to be Micah. My sour mood resurfaced.
“Your annoyance got channeled to me,” Ethan said as he gathered his plate and I stood up to go answer the door. “I figured I was working off your emotions when I found myself in a one sided argument with Luna for no reason. And I also figured it involved Micah, so I’ll be making my escape now.” He made a stop at the kitchen to deposit his plate then headed to his room as I let Micah in.
“If you want food you’ll have to heat it up,” I said as he dropped his messenger bag onto the armchair. He gave me a kiss on the cheek before heading into the kitchen. I trailed after him, trying to decide how pissed I should be at this point. Was it even worth it? I was also pissed that he’d been so unreachable today, so yeah it was worth it.
“I’m really sorry, Selene, I didn’t mean to stand you up.”
“Oh, I wasn’t stood up. Andrew was there.”
That made Micah stop and turn to look at me. “What?”
“Yup. Came in to pick up an order and kept me company for a while.”
“I see,” Micah said tightly. “How nice of him.”
“Yes, and how nice of you to stay behind and help Amy with her car trouble while forgetting about your plans with me.”
“I didn’t forget, I told you—”
“Yeah, you lost track of time, Amy’s car trouble was that all consuming, or maybe it was Amy herself?”
“What?” Micah put his plate down and walked over to where I was leaning against the kitchen counter. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“I don’t know,” I said with a shrug. “It’s no secret Amy’s into you, maybe she’s getting you to come around? Car trouble is a classic move of seduction. Seeing as it made you miss dinner with me, I’d say it’s working.” I knew I was being unfair, but I didn’t really care right now.
“Selene, what the hell. You should know better than that. I am not into Amy in the least. I was just trying to be a good guy. You are the only one that I want. You know that.”
“Do I?” I gave him a direct look. “Then how come we haven’t done more than what amounts to second base since we’ve been together?”
Micah looked taken aback. “Selene…come on, you know…”
“I know what? I was fine with taking things slow with you, but no matter how subtle or not subtle I try to be, you keep refusing me. And I’m supposed to believe I’m the only one you want?” I took a step closer to him and lowered my voice. “Is it because of the Rot, Micah? Is it because I’m dying and it’s written all over my face? Amy is pretty robust in comparison, so I guess I can’t blame you if you want—”
“Would you just shut the hell up!” Micah yelled. “What is wrong with you, how can you say that to me?”
“Because that’s what it looks like! Even before tonight! Fine, you missed dinner, it’s not that big a deal, but why have you been denying me? We’ve barely been on three dates, and these past few days you’ve been MIA more than you’ve been around. So I guess all those things have culminated into making me think the worst.”
“Selene, I want you, I want you more than I’ve wanted anyone, and it’s because of how much I fu
cking care about you that I haven’t…that we haven’t…”
“Had sex,” I stated. “You can say the words, we aren’t kids.”
Micah blew out a long breath and ran his hands through his hair.
“I’m scared of hurting you more than you’re already hurting. Your body is weakening, and I don’t want to put any more demands on it than it needs. You don’t know how hard it’s been to hold back from…”
“Did one of those history books tell you that? ‘Sex with a girl with the Rot can cause her to Rot that much faster.’ Is that what you’ve been uncovering? Give me a break.”
“Selene.” He took me by the shoulders but I crossed my hands over my chest and wouldn’t look at him.
“So much is happening, you know that. So many bad things I have no control over. Did it ever occur to you that being close to you could be something that helped make it more bearable? That it could give me the strength and comfort I need? But no, instead I’ve been feeling distant from you and rejected. How helpful.”
Micah hung his head and sighed again.
“I’m so sorry,” he said, raising his head. “I wasn’t trying to push you way. The fact that you’re dying weighs on me every second of every day and I’m afraid of letting you see just how much it’s destroying me. All I want to do is be strong for you and find some way to save you, but I guess I’ve been so preoccupied with that I forgot that I also need to be here for you when you need me.”
I looked at him. “I’m not the type of girl who finds it easy to say she needs someone to lean on.” My anger was subsiding. I knew Micah cared about me despite the things I’d said, and I knew how much time he spent pouring over books and doing research with Ilyse.
“But I really do need you. You, Ilyse, and Ethan are all I have to keep me from sinking to dark places over all of this. I’m sorry about what I said. I just really needed you today.”
“I’m sorry.” Micah pulled me into his arms and held me tightly. He’d recently started to give me hugs that were a little looser, like he thought I’d break apart if he held on too tightly, so I was glad for the crushing embrace he gave me now. I wrapped my arms around him and buried my face in his neck, feeling weak, but not from the Rot, just from how much I missed being close to him like this.
“I’m sorry I couldn’t be there for you today with the press conference and the ghost beastie,” he said. “But I’m glad you’re OK.”
“We have to find our good moments among the chaos,” I whispered. “It can’t only be about the nightmares.”
“I know,” he said, stroking my hair. “I will do better, I promise. Please forgive me. Please.” He pulled back and kissed me, long and slow, and it was just the thing I needed after the day I’d had. He moved his lips and trailed them down my neck and my breath caught in my throat. I felt like a spark of electricity was running circuits though my body. Micah’s hand slipped under my shirt and skimmed up my back, and the sensation drew another gasp from me and made me bite his bottom lip, which drew a sound of pleasure from him. I devoured his mouth with my own, biting, licking, sucking, and kissing him until we were both breathless and my shirt was almost completely off. Micah picked me up, and I wrapped my legs around his waist, continuing to kiss him as he walked us to my bedroom. Once there, he took a moment to set me on my feet so he could gently nudge Luna out and shut the door, then he grabbed me around the waist and pushed me onto the bed.
“I want you.” His breath was hot against the nape of my neck and it made things low in my body clench in desire. I arched my back off the bed, trying to press myself closer to him.
“Then take me,” I whispered back. I made quick work of getting rid of his shirt, letting my hands and mouth claim his bare skin. My tongue ran circles on his chest while my hands reveled in the hard lines of his body. Micah moaned softly, and I soon found myself shirtless with my hands pinned above my head while he used his mouth to drag one of my breasts out of my bra, using his lips and tongue in a way that drove me crazy and had me gasping beneath him. I struggled for him to let my hands go so I could wrap them around him, but he kept them pinned, and that only drove me crazier. He finally let my hands go so he could remove the bra completely, then he got my jeans off.
Micah slowly moved up my body, starting with my legs, planting kisses or trailing his tongue over my skin. He skimmed his tongue around the edge of my panties, teasing me, which made me clutch the bed sheet in my fists. He ran his tongue up my stomach, claimed my breast again with his mouth while his other arm slipped under me and arched my body up closer to his. He was so hard as I ground against him that it almost undid me completely. Micah raised up and stared at me as I lay there panting, covered in a dewy sweat, my body feeling overheated.
“I love you,” he whispered, eyes locked on mine. That broke through my lusty haze for a moment. I raised my hands to cup the sides of his face, lowered his face to mine, and kissed him slowly and tenderly.
“I love you too,” I whispered back, close enough that our lips brushed. “So much.”
He released a shuddering sigh and kissed me before rising up enough to get his jeans and underwear off. Then he grabbed my legs, pulled me forward, and slid inside me. I released a gasping scream as I felt him enter me, and I pulled his body back down on top of mine as he found his rhythm and our bodies started moving like we were a single flow of water rushing wild and free. Our bodies were feverishly hot, and all I could think about was trying to pull Micah closer and closer until it felt like we melded into one. He pulled back from kissing me but stayed only inches away so we stared at each other as our bodies danced. I felt electrified, passionate, strong, and safe, completely wrapped up in Micah, knowing that there wasn’t anything he wouldn’t do for me. I came first, screaming and digging my fingers into the skin of his back, which only seemed to spur him on more, and he finished a couple minutes later, halfway collapsing on top of me so I could feel how frantically his heart was beating. I ran my fingers through his damp hair, keeping my legs wrapped around him, and lay soft kisses on the side of his face. His own face was buried in the nape of my neck.
“I’m glad I kept taking my birth control,” I said a little breathlessly. “I knew you’d come around, Stone.” He laughed, then rolled off me and pulled me into his arms, and I fell asleep to Micah stroking my hair and telling me that he loved me.
CHAPTER SIX
Waking up wrapped in Micah’s arms was an infinitely better way to start the day. Tuesday was kicking Monday’s ass so far.
We were lying in bed, delaying getting up because it meant we’d have to be parted. Micah had his fingers tangled in my hair while I lay on his bare chest, running my hand up and down his deliciously toned abs and firm chest. But I wanted to do more than that. Last night was the first time we had been intimate since being in a relationship, and I felt like a starved woman. I wanted more. Morning breath be damned. I lay soft kisses on his chest, then trailed my tongue down his abs, which made his body shudder, especially when I started tugging his boxers down. He was already aroused, which turned me on even more. I ran my tongue up and down his shaft and heard his breath catch. I smiled, and continued to tease him with whisper soft caresses from my tongue, and his body went tense with anticipation. Just when I decided I’d ease his suffering and take him into my mouth, I had a very unsexy coughing fit. I moved back, raising a hand to my mouth and tried to stop the body racking coughs but couldn’t suppress them. Micah quickly ran out of the room and came back with a glass of water, then put his arm around me and gently patted my back until the coughing eased. I drank the water then sat at the edge of the bed for a few minutes to catch my breath.
“Well, that wasn’t exactly the direction I was trying to go in,” I said. My voice sounded slightly hoarse. Micah’s face was all sad concern.
“Don’t look at me like that.” My tone had more bite than it should.
His eyes slightly widened.
“I’m worried about you, how else am I supposed to look at you?”<
br />
“Like I’m normal! I’ve told you more than once Micah, stop treating me like I’m a patient.”
“But you are a patient!” Micah said. “Why are you being so ridiculous right now?”
“Maybe because I’m tired of you looking at me more like I’m an invalid rather than a hot, desirable girlfriend that you can’t keep your hands off of! This isn’t how a normal relationship works!”
“You’re right, it’s not. Because you’re fucking sick, Selene, and you refuse to accept it. I get that you’re a strong, independent person, and that you are determined not to just sit back and let the Rot take you. Those are things I love about you, but what I love less is your damn stubbornness. You refuse to accept that you have to take it easy. You just coughed up blood for five minutes and you’re snapping at me because I look worried?”
“I hate this!” I shot to my feet and started pacing, even though I still felt weak from the coughing fit. “Sometimes it’s like you’re here but you’re miles away. All you think about when it comes to me is that I’m sick, no, that I’m dying. And while I am thankful for your determination to find some way to save my life, why can’t you stop every now and then and just see me as me? Why can’t we try to pretend to be normal?”
“So what was I supposed to do just now? Wait for you to stop coughing, clean the blood up and push your head back to my crotch? Be reasonable Selene.”
“That’s not what I’m saying.” I raked my fingers through my hair.
“Then what are you saying?” Now Micah was on his feet, facing me. “What do you expect me to be like here, Selene? I’m not dealing with being in love with someone who just has the flu, I’m in love with someone who is slowly dying, in pain almost every moment of every day, and even though there’s nothing I can fucking do about it I’m still trying my best. And now it’s like that’s not even good enough, you want more. God, Selene, have you stopped to think about what this is doing to me? I want to be everything you need me to be, I want to be strong for you, I want to save you, but I also feel like I am dying inside. If I have to face a day when I’m burying you in the ground or scattering your ashes, I don’t think I will survive it.”