Think of one hard-to-love person in your life. What practical things could you do to begin to love them better?
Prayer: Lord, the feelings of my heart are so unruly, but teach me how to exhort my heart rather than simply listening to it (Psalms 42:5, 103:1–5). And help me in my resolve to also take charge of it by loving and obeying what you command. Amen.
March 25
The path of the righteous is like the morning sun, shining ever brighter till the full light of day. But the way of the wicked is like deep darkness; they do not know what makes them stumble. (4:18–19)
ACTIONS OPEN THE EYES. The paths of love and of selfishness lead to two different end points. But they also differ along the way. One path brightens gradually and the other darkens. The darkness represents increasing self-deception. We say, “I’m not proud, just confident. I’m not abrasive, just direct. I’m not greedy, just sharp in business.” The more we follow the path of self, the more we live in denial until, when life breaks down, we do not know what makes us stumble. Self-deception is not the worst thing you can do, but it’s the means by which we do the very worst things. The sin that is most distorting your life right now is the one you can’t see.
On the other hand, those growing in grace (2 Peter 3:18) take the path shining ever brighter. They see more and more things about God and themselves that they were denying. Why? The gospel so assures us of God’s love that we are finally capable of admitting the worst about ourselves. In his love, based on Christ’s work, not ours, it is finally safe to do so.
Ask two or three good friends, “What is a character flaw of mine that others can see but I can’t see as clearly?”
Prayer: Lord, there is no more important petition than this one—show me my hidden faults. Amen.
March 26
Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. Keep your mouth free of perversity; keep corrupt talk far from your lips. Let your eyes look straight ahead; fix your gaze directly before you. Give careful thought to the paths for your feet and be steadfast in all your ways. (4:23–26)
THE HEART SHAPES THE ACTIONS. In the Bible the heart is not primarily the seat of the emotions in contrast to the head as the seat of reason. Rather, the heart is the seat of your deepest trusts, commitments, and loves, from which everything . . . flows. What the heart most loves and trusts, the mind finds reasonable, the emotions find desirable, and the will finds doable.
How do you guard your heart? The passage hints that, though ultimately the heart is the central control, our words, eyes, and feet can influence the heart. If we gaze longingly enough at an object, it may capture our heart through the imagination (as when Achan looked, desired, and finally stole the treasure in Joshua 7). If we speak bitterly against someone, we can sour our heart toward them. The best way to guard your heart for wisdom is worship, in which the mouth, the mind, the imagination, and even the body are all oriented to God.
Is there some way in which you are failing to guard your heart right now? Are there things you are seeing or doing that may be moving your heart away from God?
Prayer: Lord, help me to guard my heart. Just as I don’t want to digest or take bad things into my body, give me the wisdom and self-control not to allow toxic images and beliefs into my heart through my imagination and thoughts. Amen.
March 27
All a person’s ways seem pure to them, but motives are weighed by the LORD. (16:2)
GOD AND THE HEART. You don’t know yourself unless you know that your motives are never pure, and that they always seem better to you than they do to the Lord, who weighs them. This has huge implications for decision making and relationships. If you are always sure of your sincerity and purity, you will make impulsive snap judgments. You will be too dismissive of some options and ideas and too doggedly committed to others.
Not trusting your heart prevents two opposite errors. On the one hand, our consciences can be too easy on us. “My conscience is clear, but that does not make me innocent” (1 Corinthians 4:4). Follow God’s Word instead of your feelings. If the Scripture says it is wrong, it is. On the other hand, our hearts can be too hard on us. “If our hearts condemn us, . . . God is greater than our hearts” (1 John 3:20). Follow the gospel instead of your feelings. You are loved for Christ’s sake, not because your heart and life are perfect. Without God’s word of grace to build us up (Acts 20:32), we will fall into false guilt or false innocence.
Into which of these two mistakes are you more likely to fall? What can you do about it?
Prayer: Lord, both an overscrupulous conscience and a numb conscience are ways that my heart continues its self-salvation project. They are both ways of refusing to believe I am saved by sheer grace through Jesus. Drill the gospel down into my inmost being by the power of your Spirit. Amen.
March 28
Who can say, “I have kept my heart pure; I am clean and without sin”? (20:9)
NOT EVEN ONE. Proverbs may appear to imply that we can make ourselves good through our efforts. Yet at key places the book reminds us that wisdom is a gift of grace, and here is one of them. No one can make themselves good. Similarly, “there is no one righteous, not even one” (Romans 3:10), and “if you, Lord, kept a record of sins . . . who could stand?” (Psalm 130:3). How does this truth make us wise?
First, it means that everyone is lost. To be clean and pure is to be acceptable before God, but no one is. Psalm 130:3 says no one can “stand” before God. So the wise do not divide the world into the “good guys” and the “bad guys.” Both moral and immoral are alienated from God, though in different ways. Second, it means God must save by grace. So the wise fuel their efforts for right living out of joy and gratitude for the free salvation they have in Christ. They escape the drudgery and crushing motive of seeking righteousness in order to deserve it.
Do you tend to divide the world into the “good” types and “bad” types? How does that contradict a sound doctrine of sin?
Prayer: Lord, I should not be disappointed that people are as bad as they are, so much as amazed that so many of them are as good as they are by your grace. Let me be as gracious to sinners as you are. Amen.
March 29
Whoever conceals their sins does not prosper, but the one who confesses and renounces them finds mercy. (28:13)
CONFESSION. If we try to cover up our sin, God will expose us. If we expose our sin, God will cover it with his mercy. How do we conceal sins from others? We lie. We blame-shift and make excuses. We tell people to mind their own business and point to the good things we have done. We rationalize that our motives were good or that our action wasn’t technically wrong.
But we also hide our sins from ourselves. We find ways to justify them, as we give lip service and admit a sin but we don’t renounce it. Despite the subterfuge, deep down we know we are sinners, that there is something seriously wrong with us. This produces severe imbalances in our psychological life, from which flow many ills: eating disorders, anxiety, substance abuse, overwork, anger. We may find ourselves so needy for affirmation that we stay in the wrong, or even abusive, relationships. The solution? “If we confess our sins . . . we have an advocate with the Father—Jesus Christ, the Righteous One. He is the atoning sacrifice for our sins” (1 John 1:9, 2:1–2).
What is your most typical strategy for concealing your sin—from others or from yourself?
Prayer: Lord, I want and need a clear conscience, but that can’t be unless I fully admit where I have a bad one. Unveil to me where I conceal my sin so that I can confess it and let you, and you alone, cover it through your infinite mercy. Amen.
March 30
The discerning heart seeks knowledge, but the mouth of a fool feeds on folly. (15:14)
THE DISCERNING HEART. Fools can be said to be all mouth, always spouting foolishness. The wise, however, are all heart—and every new experience is a way for their hearts to become more discerning.
I
n a TV episode, based on an Agatha Christie story, a retired Scotland Yard inspector explains to an incredulous friend that Miss Marple is the greatest criminologist in England. “There she sits,” he says, “an elderly spinster. Sweet, placid, or so you’d think. Yet her mind has plumbed the depths of human iniquity and taken it all in a day’s work. She has lived all her life in a little rural village of St. Mary Mead. It’s extraordinary! She knows the world only through the prism of that village and its daily life, but by knowing the village so thoroughly, she seems to know the world.” Like Jesus, the ultimate wise one, she loves people but she doesn’t trust human nature (John 2:23–25). The secrets of wisdom are locked in your ordinary experience if you know how to learn from it. Ask God to help you develop a discerning heart.80
In what area or way has God enabled you to grow in discernment during the past year?
Prayer: Lord, you are the ultimate teacher of wisdom. You sat with your disciples and taught them in parables. Now help me learn wisdom from my experience. I commit new time to prayer, reading, and solitude, so you can do that for me. Amen.
March 31
As water reflects the face, so one’s life reflects the heart. (27:19)
INTROVERT OR EXTROVERT? As water shows us our face, so one’s life reflects the heart. But whose heart and whose life are being referred to? Is it saying that we should explore our life history to understand what is in our hearts—as did Augustine in his Confessions? Or does it mean that by getting to know others, you can learn about your own heart? For example, there is no better way to see what you are doing wrong in your own marriage than to try to counsel and help friends whose marriage is troubled.
There’s good reason to think that the ambiguity of the proverb is deliberate. To truly come to wise self-knowledge you must use both methods. Introverts are more naturally inclined to explore their own lives and extroverts to get involved in the lives of others. But both methods for self-knowledge are needed. Introverts should get out more, and extroverts should spend more time in solitary thought.
Are you more of an introvert or extrovert? How can you begin to use the way of wisdom that you are not naturally inclined to use?
Prayer: Lord, “but who can discern their own errors? Forgive my hidden faults. Keep your servant also from willful sins; may they not rule over me” (Psalm 19:12–13). Show me what I must do to cooperate with you in the answering of this prayer. Amen.
April 1
Like a coating of silver dross on earthenware are fervent lips with an evil heart. Enemies disguise themselves with their lips, but in their hearts they harbor deceit. Though their speech is charming, do not believe them, for seven abominations fill their hearts. (26:23–25)
INSIDE AND OUTSIDE. 26:23 introduces the image of a vessel that looks like pure silver but is just valueless clay with a thin coating of silver dross. This distinction between the inside and outside is crucial to biblical wisdom. In the fairy tale The Princess and Curdie, by George MacDonald, the hero is given a magical ability. He can touch the hand of someone and discern their true inward character. So he might shake the hand of a beautiful woman or man and perceive the claw of a vulture, or he might take the hand of a monster and feel the fingers of a loving child. This ability, of course, enables him to triumph.
The more you grow in godly wisdom, the more you get this same world-beating ability. “Wise folk see through the façade of hypocrisy, withhold trust, and do not take liars at face value.”81 In order to live wisely in our present culture of self-promotion, fake news, alternative facts, and the overthrow of reason, the ability to discern evil disguised as good could not be more important.
Recall a time when you seriously misread someone’s character and intentions, perhaps because of attractive superficialities. How likely are you to make the same mistake again?
Prayer: Lord, I live in a culture that puts all the stress on image and beauty. Don’t let me be swayed by appearances. Keep me from favoring people based on their looks. Let me remember that the most beautiful soul in history was not beautiful to look at (Isaiah 53:2). Amen.
April 2
The purposes of a person’s heart are deep waters, but one who has insight draws them out. (20:5)
DEEP WATERS. If you want to hide something, a good way is to throw it into deep waters. So too our heart motives seem out of sight. However, “wise persons can bring to the surface what others have in mind, even when there are attempts at concealment.”82 This tells us the wise are able to discern motives—both their own and those of others. While we want to think we are telling the truth for noble motives, are we really being driven by insecurity or resentment? While this person assures us he is on our side, is he really just using us for his own purposes?
We must remember it is possible to become overly suspicious or paranoid (28:1), or just uncharitable (1 Corinthians 13:7), which can lead to as many wrong decisions as naïveté. As insight is a gift of God (2:6, 9:10), it is better to think of this ability to discern hearts not as a technique but as a spiritual gift from the only one who can see every heart to the very bottom (16:2). Don’t look for little signs by which you can “spy the lie.” Insight comes through growth in grace and its accompanying self-knowledge. “My own heart”—we need no other—“showeth me the wickedness of the ungodly” (Psalm 36:1).83
How gullible are you?
Prayer: Lord, I want to be wise but I’ve often been fooled. Yet I don’t want to take an always-skeptical stance either. Both are simplistic. Give me insight into people’s hearts so that I trust those I should trust and beware of those of whom I should be wary. Amen.
Reordering Desires
April 3
What the wicked dread will overtake them; what the righteous desire will be granted. . . . The righteousness of the upright delivers them, but the unfaithful are trapped by evil desires. . . . Desire without knowledge is not good—how much more will hasty feet miss the way! (10:24, 11:6, 19:2)
TRAPPED BY DESIRE. The “heart” is not mere feeling but rather the seat of our deepest trusts and loves (March 26). Today’s society, however, identifies our strongest feelings as the “true self” and insists we express them. But wisdom recognizes that our desires can trap us (11:6). They can also be influenced from outside. Modern consumer capitalism creates the desire to accumulate material goods that, we think, will give us status and identity. Poor parenting can train children to so desire approval and love that they remain in abusive relationships or become workaholics.
Wise people do not simply accept their desires as they are, nor with hasty feet run to fulfill them. Rather, as Augustine counseled, they reorder their desires with the knowledge of the truth. The problem of the workaholic, for example, is not that we love work too much, but that we love God too little, relative to our career. What the righteous desire is ultimately God himself, seeing his face. “I . . . will see your face . . . I will be satisfied with seeing your likeness” (Psalm 17:15). Only if we cultivate our relationship to God and grow the desire for him will our other desires not entrap us.
What loves or desires do you have that are “inordinate,” that push God out of the top spot?
Prayer: Lord, I see that I don’t really love my job or my comforts or my family too much. I love you too little in proportion to them. Only if I love you supremely will I love everything else well and properly. Capture my heart! Amen.
April 4
A longing fulfilled is sweet to the soul, but fools detest turning from evil. . . . Do not let your heart envy sinners, but always be zealous for the fear of the LORD. There is surely a future hope for you, and your hope will not be cut off. (13:19, 23:17–18)
ORDERING DESIRE. The soul has an appetite. We are drawn to good things that are satisfying, but nothing besides God himself should be a nonnegotiable necessity for life. Every other enjoyment comes with the danger that we make it such. “To set your heart on [any good] thing is to weaken the power to assess it. It mus
t be had, at all costs, not now because of its worth but because you have promised it to yourself.”84
How, then, can we desire God above all other things? Plato said actions flow from thinking and Aristotle taught that our thinking is shaped by our actions. Proverbs says they are both right. Contemplate 23:17–18. Use the mind to think—what are the only things that finally last? (There is . . . a future hope.) Set the heart on God in prayer and worship until you don’t just believe but experience awe and wonder (be zealous . . . fear) before him. And set the will on obedience. Don’t envy (or imitate) sinners. These things will reorder your desires.
How specifically will you implement any of these strategies this week? See the prayer below for one.
Prayer: Lord, I spend far more time asking for various things than in praise and adoration of your greatness. No wonder, then, that I long for the things more than I long for you. How wonderful that the thing that most honors you will most transform me. I commit myself to giving you that glory every day. Amen.
April 5
Do not envy the wicked, do not desire their company; for their hearts plot violence, and their lips talk about making trouble. (24:1–2)
THE SOCIOLOGY OF DESIRE. Sociologists know that we tend to find most plausible the ideas of the people with whom we spend the most time and to whom our admiration is most directed. If we “sit in the company of mockers” (Psalm 1:1) or of the cruel and violent (verse 2), we will become like them. It is easy to envy mockers and cruel people because they are often successful through their ruthlessness.
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