Chrystal leaned toward Nona. “It is safest. I grew up on the Deep; they are not likely to reject me. Yi is from the High Sweet Home, and while I met Jason on the Deep, he only lived there for a few years before we left. He doesn’t have family there like I do.”
Nona stared at her, round-eyed. “You’d split up?”
“Not if there was any better choice,” Yi said. “But we consider the Deep a risk.”
“You’re probably right,” Charlie said. They had clearly been out-thinking Nona and him. It left him feeling backed into a corner, although the plan was good. He waited a while, thinking, before he turned to Yi. “You know I may be trying to create a resistance force?” he asked Yi. “Are you okay with that?”
“But you will not harm us?” Yi asked.
“Of course not.”
“Then I will have some time to try and convince you not to harm others, either.”
Charlie had planned to leave for Lym as soon as the others were back on the Deep. Yi’s plan didn’t leave Charlie in a worse place, except that he lost Nona sooner.
“None of the other ships will be near us in time to cause trouble?” Nona asked.
“Not unless a new threat shows up,” Yi said. “We can’t rule out a ship from Ivorn itself, for example.”
Nona grinned. “So we just tell Gunnar we’re heading for Ivorn, and leave it up to him to figure out if he can beat us?”
When Yi nodded, Nona looked at Charlie and grinned. “I like a race.”
CHAPTER FORTY-SEVEN
CHRYSTAL
Chrystal curled naked in one of the many extra bedrooms on the Star Ghost. She dialed back most of her senses, creating the closest thing she could manage to a white world with almost no information coming into it. Her body didn’t feel unless it was stressed or in pain, cold or hot, or touching something. So in this moment, she felt dreamy and unconnected, like a consciousness that had no actual home.
Jason and Yi had gone as far away as possible, to the far side of the ship, and turned themselves down into their own whitened world. The two of them were together; they would feel each other, touch each other. She would be alone.
Simulation.
She set a timer for two hours and let her mind drift. Memories surfaced, older memories of being a child in her own room after her parents had closed the door and gone away into other portions of their habitat or out for a late-night meal, leaving her with nothing but her minder-bot.
She no longer had a minder, unless she counted herself. She laughed, a little bitter, and the laugh made her feel the empty present, so she tried for the older times again, for the silent room and long slow minutes of awake time after she’d been put to bed.
She stretched, something the child in her had done as well.
As long as she left her eyes closed it was possible to feel time in that old way, ticking slowly by. Child’s time. Alone time.
Torture.
She started to sing, beginning with her old childhood songs.
Eventually she forgot the chorus to one and her voice trailed off, and she sat in total silence until enough contentment crept over her that she felt better.
She checked and the time had only moved a quarter of the way. What other times had she been alone? There was a summer when Nona had gone into a special dance school with Satyana and Marcelle. They hadn’t included Chrystal. Her other friends had done similar things, so she was alone with her parents, who worked. She had moped for a day, and then she had started drawing. Each day, she had spent a little more time drawing. By day five, she became fascinated with the use of color to create depth and dimension, and with the interplay of light and shadow. When Nona came back from dance school, Chrystal had a clever drawing of a still life—fruit bedecked with glittering jewelry.
The picture still hung in her mother’s kitchen.
More importantly, she had liked being alone in that moment even though she’d gotten out of the habit of it again, become paired to Katherine and then to the two men.
She needed to relearn the mental tricks of living alone.
She would have Nona, but communicating with Jason and Yi was so much richer.
The thought jolted her.
The lesson was to learn to be without her other parts. That’s what Jason and Yi had become, parts of her that she could talk to twenty-four hours a day.
The timer was halfway through. She’d made it this far. She was on the downhill, and her memories were sharper rather than duller. Such a strange artifact of losing her biological self, this resurgence of memories she’d long lost.
She relived walks she had taken by herself, a camp she had gone to, long conversations with Nona, the two of them giggling about clothes and body-mods and tats. She remembered when they had gotten the matching dragons, the way the needle had been sharp and then sharper and the pain, and how the pain had seemed like a bonding, the two of them lying together in the same shop and being worked on at the same time.
When the timer went off, it surprised her. She forced herself to wait a few more trembling moments before she turned herself back up and up, and reached out to feel Jason and Yi. We can do this.
We know.
It will be okay.
You’re strong.
She was the one who would be the most alone.
I’ll be okay. But I will miss you every moment.
And we you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
Such comfort in such human words.
CHAPTER FORTY-EIGHT
CHARLIE
Charlie ran his hand along Nona’s shoulder and neck and traced the line of her jaw with his fingers. Her head rested in his lap, her hair tickling his thigh. Touching her felt so precious. This woman he had expected to scorn, now joined with him and about to be swept away from him.
He would miss her. There were only hours now. They were ahead of the Sultry Savior, everything on plan, Yi adjusting and tweaking the engines and trajectory constantly. Even though Yi had been forced to work though the ship’s AI, his constant attention reminded Charlie of sailing races where he had been responsible for the trim of jib and jenny and spinnaker, watching always for the exact wind direction, focusing on yellow ribbons sewn to the sail in such a way that they twitched with the slightest wind.
He had thought spaceships did what they did, like trains, that they set a course and then nothing changed unless there was some kind of catastrophe. But in truth they were a moving object working to line up with another moving object, and they had the ability to make tiny adjustments in engine thrust and direction. Yi was calculating perfect minutia.
Nona reached up and traced the line of his jaw. “Be careful,” she said. “You’ll be more of a target than I will.”
Meaning she and Chrystal would be protected by one of the most powerful men in the system, and he would be by himself, in her ship, protecting the two robots. Or being protected by them. Or something.
“I’m certain that fighting the Next is impossible,” she said. Not a new argument. They’d had it a few times, a running disagreement.
“I’ve been thinking about that. It depends on what they’d do. Imagining that Chrystal is a Next is wrong. These are their creatures, but your friends are not them.”
“Yi thinks they might be.”
He laughed and captured Nona’s hand. Her fingers were cool. He wrapped his hand around them. “Yi is often right, but that’s wishful thinking, at least for now.”
She fell silent for a long time, returning his touches gently. Then she caught his gaze, so intense that she seemed to be looking into him. “I know you have to go back to Lym. You have to do whatever you’re going to do to save it. I get that. It’s a beautiful place. I want to go back there and finish my itinerary, see the things I missed.”
His voice came out thick and deep. “You’ll have to come get your ship.”
“Will I?” She withdrew her hand and sat up. “Maybe you’ll fly it to the Deep.
”
“Maybe I’ll never want to leave home again.”
“Never is a long time.”
He pulled her back close to him, craving the warmth of her back. She curled into him, letting out a soft moan. If they had any more time, he would take that as an invitation. “I need to see you again,” he whispered, knowing it for the truth. In this moment, with the smell of her hanging in the air and the taste of her still on his tongue, he didn’t want to leave her at all.
Nona twisted so that he could reach her lips with his, and he kissed her as tenderly as he could, withholding the heat that might drive him into staying a few more minutes.
When they separated, he pushed her up and stood. “We can’t let the robots dock the ship.”
“No. They might think they run the place.”
CHAPTER FORTY-NINE
NONA
Nona sat in one of many greeting rooms at the Ivorn, scanning news articles on her slate. Chrystal sat behind her, dressed in a bright blue pair of Nona’s silky pants and a black turtleneck. Her legs were crossed, her hand rested on her knee, her face had slackened into what Nona called her “waiting robot” pose. They’d cut Chrystal’s hair shorter and sprayed it temporarily lighter, hoping she would look different enough from the news stories that she wouldn’t be noticed in casual surveillance.
Nothing to see here. Just a woman and her personal-assistant-bot waiting for a ship to come in.
People walked by in the corridors, and sometimes they glanced in. Apparently either no one watched the surveillance cameras, no one cared, or no one wanted to cause a problem. Still, her shoulder blades itched.
From time to time she glanced up at a sign on the wall where scrolling bright orange letters announced arrivals and departures from the spaceport. The Sultry Savior was still supposed to dock here, now in fifteen minutes. They would probably see Gunnar and his crew in an hour—it would take time to park and turn off the ship, get out of it, and get into the station itself.
The seats were harder and more uncomfortable than most of the waiting rooms Nona was used to, but then the Ivorn wasn’t really much of a station; just a refueling/re-provisioning stop with a minor repair operation, a few cheap hotels for people stuck between ships, and myriad bars and brothels.
If Gunnar owned any part of it, she didn’t see any sign of him. He probably did use it for a refueling station since there weren’t many this far out. Obviously it was occasionally on a path for a trip between the Deep and the Satwa.
Was Gunnar smuggling things to and from the Next?
Gunnar?
Charlie had implied it, and the Next had implied it.
Did Satyana know?
Surely not.
She glanced back down at her slate. News columns and vids played up both of the stories she’d overheard in Charlie’s conversation with Gunnar. The Edge of Happiness reported success for the first three humans turned cyborg. In contrast, the Bleeding Edge had gone silent. There was a single five-day-old story about Shoshone starting the process, and of course, the stories of ships fleeing. Apparently they’d all gotten away; the Next had been magnanimous. The Edge of Night had refused to retreat all the way across the Ring, but had settled into an orbit just inside for now, a sort of symbolic protest perhaps, or a demonstration of their patience.
Other news implied fear and uncertainty. Two religion-based stations had taken different perspectives. One wanted to fight the Next to the death and the other had taken up the refrain from Paul’s Hope and was trying to convince people that becoming Next was a stepping stone to Nirvana. Funny how such voices had been mostly silent before the Next appeared.
At least three stations had increased the line rates to build military-grade ships faster. Three of the bigger stations, including the Deep, were buying as many of the extra ships as could possibly be manufactured in the next year. The Deep’s ship production was also turning military. News stories suggested a political divide inside the station. Nona searched for her own name and found it in a multitude of stories about their escape from the Satwa, but didn’t see any reference to her arrival here yet.
Chrystal hissed. “The board says they are using a different bay.”
Nona glanced up. Now twenty minutes away and across the station. “Let’s go.”
A train circled the entire station, stopping at each greeting room. They boarded and stood, holding onto poles and swaying. The repair-bot had been left with Yi and Jason, and so Chrystal only had a backpack. Nona had a rolling bag full of clothes for both of them and a few other personal belongings.
About halfway to their new destination, the train doors let three people in paramilitary clothes on, two women and a man. They wore serious expressions and clutched weapons. Patches on their shoulders identified them as Ivorn Port Guards. They paid no direct attention to Nona and Chrystal, but they stood straight and kept passing intense looks back and forth.
Nona backed herself and Chrystal into a corner, staying near a door. She glanced at her friend, and found Chrystal’s eyes hooded and guarded. “Our stop is next,” she whispered.
Chrystal nodded.
They had to shoulder between three more uniformed soldiers to get off. As the train pulled away, Nona said, “I hope that’s not about Gunnar.”
“I think it is.”
“Why? What did you notice?”
“They smelled of fear and adrenaline. They are not doing something common to them. It can’t be a coincidence that they are here now, when we are. They looked so . . . predatory. They were almost scary.”
“To you?” Nona asked.
“Sure.”
“I don’t think of you as being scared.”
“Maybe after you’ve lost everything and been reborn, you want to make sure you don’t lose again. I doubt I have a third life.”
“I understand.” So many things Nona wanted to talk to Chrystal about. She looked around. People filled the room, apparently expecting to leave: they had luggage and even a few children with them. A dog whined in a carrier in a corner and a small boy whispered to it, which didn’t seem to calm it much at all. “Maybe we should stay here.”
“These people are already in a line,” Chrystal noted.
Sure enough, a silvery boarding robot dressed in a blue and white uniform started talking into a microphone.
“So we get on the next train?”
In two minutes, another train came by. Nona scanned it for uniforms. None. “Okay. Let’s get on.”
Nona worried the whole rest of the ride, all the time trying her best to look like a bored traveler.
They were going to be late.
At the train neared the right station, she peered through the scratched windows, trying to see if the military had in fact landed here. Chrystal was looking over her shoulder. The train stopped and the doors opened, illuminating a room full of uniforms. “It’s okay,” Chrystal said, pushing Nona out before she had time to be certain she agreed. She almost tripped, steadied only by Chrystal’s smooth grasp on her elbow as the doors whooshed shut behind them.
Well over half of the uniforms belonged to the Sultry Savior. Gunnar himself stood beside Henry James. Gunnar looked pleased to see her. Henry had the common sense to look down and away.
The uniformed men and women they had seen on the train all stood quietly, with their weapons piled on the floor at their feet. Gunnar gave orders. “Fall in. Don’t take the train. Use the walking corridors.”
The disarmed Ivorn Port Guards were herded in the front and kept under careful watch by Henry James and ten of his crew. Gunnar came near until he towered over her, asking “Where are the others?”
She took a deep breath. “What happened?”
“They didn’t want us on their station. I convinced them they should be hospitable.”
“Did they tell you why?”
“That the Savior is yours and you were seen in the company of some of the Next. They didn’t want any soulbots on board to pollute the station.”
&nb
sp; A chill almost made her stumble. “The Savior left before I did. What right did they have?”
“They saw us pick up a pod. Amia. I convinced them to leave us alone for the moment but we need to be off this station in ten minutes. Where are the others?”
She took a deep breath. “They’re going to Lym.”
His grip on her arm tightened. “Call them back. They won’t be safe out there.”
“No,” she said.
“You’re putting your new lover in danger.”
How the hell did he know that? “The Deep is just as dangerous.”
“I can’t help him out there.”
“Well then he’ll just have to help himself.”
“How long ago did they leave?”
She fudged. “I think it was about three hours.” Another deep breath, “They’re not going toward the Deep. Leave them alone.”
“They might die.”
He was trying to drive her with guilt. “No,” she said. “They made their own choices.”
He glanced around. “We’ll talk more after we get on the Dreaming Streak.
“Why not take the Savior?”
“We need something faster. She’ll go home, probably be there a month after us. Maybe less. Come on.”
She didn’t want to go with him, and she certainly didn’t want to have a heart-to-heart talk with him. He still outpowered her by some unimaginable amount, and he was still Satyana’s lover. None of those things made going with him feel good or safe.
She should have left Chrystal on the Satwa.
PART SIX
HOMECOMING
CHAPTER FIFTY
CHARLIE
Charlie blinked and opened crusty eyes. He reached for the buckles on his safety belt and sat up, the odd contours of the acceleration couch far easier to take lying down than sitting. He was surprised to learn they had left Ivorn station two hours before. He managed to croak out a few words before he reached for water. “I can’t believe I slept.”
“Why not?” Yi asked. “There’s not much else to do while you’re strapped down.”
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