“What about Il’lyse?” Zoey asked.
“She liked to dance. It’s ironic, really, since she had a weakness in her martial arts that she never got over.”
“And that was?”
“Change into that gi and I’ll tell you after we practice for a while.” Damn, her smile could be devious if she wanted it to be.
After Zoey came out of the changing room and rejoined her mom, she was instructed on the stretches and basic starter poses over the course of forty-five minutes. Movements started slow and sped up periodically.
“So far so good,” Bon’sinne said. “Memorize these movements and you will do well as long as you desire to improve with it.”
“I guess it’s too late to run off now, huh?” Zoey said.
“Perhaps. You do have a habit of running forward before you think about the next step. I don’t really see you as the sort of person who runs away often; not even before your promise that you made yesterday. I do, however, know that you have gotten lucky so far. You dealt one or two surprise hits on Soror Valide, from what I understand.”
“Are you saying you plan to train me so I can take her down on my own?”
“No. I wouldn’t send you against that wicked person if I can help it. My aim is to help you hold your own should the need ever arise. It is good exercise in general, as well. Let’s move on to something more practical.”
Bon’sinne smacked the backside of the dummy. Its arms and legs that were once still became animated, though slow.
“Pick a form,” she said. “And then choose: block, grapple, or strike. Choose well, and that will be the first building block in your basic training.”
What if she chose unwisely, Zoey wondered? The dummy came closer and closer with every instant that its lumbering legs hit the mat and upheld its balance and stature. The dummy by itself wasn’t terrifying, but the pressure to act was still undeniable. She bought herself some time by stepping back once, twice, and finally a third before she shifted her arms into one of the poses her mom had taught her.
Block, grapple, or strike.
The dummy marched closer until it was in range. It swung for Zoey up high, but she had already moved. She bent her legs further and clenched her fist before punching the slow-moving dummy in the area where its stomach would have been. She was so sure of her strike that she didn’t see the other arm coming from her side.
Zoey stumbled to her left and focused on getting back on her feet. She turned when she was able.
“Stop,” Bon’sinne said.
The contraption had its fist out, mere inches from hitting Zoey on the forehead.
“It’s perhaps too early to tell,” Bon’sinne said, “but with work on your forms and adding some defense to your right side, this will be a good start for the next few days. That will be easier than what I feared we would be working on.”
“What do you mean?” asked Zoey.
“You were curious about Il’lyse. We spent a revolution, sorry, I mean year, working on her legs, or trying to, before she avoided every lesson she could on the subject. Her head was in the clouds often, so she missed the ground she walked on when none of us could help it.”
“I still have to wonder, why does a society so advanced have to fight this much?”
“That is a good question. The answer will have to come another day, however.”
* * *
She approached that door by the bridge one more time today. Zoey asked herself why she’d come here, despite knowing the answer. She waited a moment in case anyone else was being interviewed by the commander.
How could she tell, Zoey realized?
Zoey knocked on the door and immediately realized how silly that was. She didn’t think she’d seen anyone knock on anything since leaving Earth behind. Zoey was reaching for the side panel when the door opened.
One of the laeknir recoiled in surprise upon seeing her, and then nodded at Zoey before walking away from the scene. The commander looked her way as plain as the pointy ears of all Aelfs. If he was surprised or expecting this visit, then Zoey had no way of telling either way. Bemused? Possibly.
“Hi, Commander, do you have a moment?” Zoey asked.
“I just might,” he replied. “I finished early for the day. Was that you making that sound on my door a moment ago?”
“Yes, I knocked on it. I’m not even sure why.”
“Well then, please, come on in and we can discuss whatever is on your mind, Miss Wi—Thalassas.”
“I see my new name is catching on.”
“Just as well, I am noticing that you are fully embracing it. I happened to have a few questions about your experience in all this, but it hardly seemed appropriate.”
Zoey sat in the chair across from him. She tried to avoid gazing right at him. “I came to ask you to interview me.”
“I’m sorry?”
“You were ordered to interview most of the ship’s crew, correct? I know I’m not one of them, but if you have any questions I can answer that would help you then it would be fair, right?”
She felt his gentle, yet firm finger lift her head up by the chin. The commander met her eyes with his, and brushed a strand of hair back behind her left ear while Zoey took in a deep breath. She so needed to be careful around this man. Either there was no telling what she would do around him, or she knew and didn’t want to accept it. She told herself that she was with someone already.
Commander Consilius retrieved an empty folder and notepad with a pen. It was then that Zoey realized that this interview was being conducted with paper and ink rather than anything with a digital interface. The sight brought her back down to reality from wherever her mind was a moment prior.
“I beg your pardon if my first question is a difficult one,” he said. “When you were transported to this ship four weeks ago you were unconscious, wounded, and in a body familiar to many people, but not to yourself. Before that you were a young man, a human, from the planet Earth, as you call it. How did it feel to wake up in a body of the opposite sex?”
“At first? It was shocking. I wasn’t sure what to make of it because it was so sudden to me, and not at all what I had planned or wanted. I felt everything in my body seize up in fear of all that was happening, between the bodily change and being in an unfamiliar place, but one young man, Das’ithrios, gave me the help I needed at first. I was able to calm down, but it was obvious that a change this drastic needed time for me to get accustomed to it if I were to stay this way.”
“And now? Do you not wish to be a man again?”
“That is the strangest thing in all of this. I remember my old life, and the handful of good times I had with it, but that doesn’t feel like me anymore. I was afraid of what I would see the first time I looked in the mirror with this body, but all I saw was me. Not anyone pretending to be me, not some monster that had be trapped inside, but me with a new face, or a new everything, really. I relearned how to walk, made new friends, and picked my given name after hearing the bottom half of a list of names a couple of times.”
“You only listened the bottom half?”
Zoey shook her head, trying not to laugh at the idea. “I started at the top and bottom thinking I would reach the middle and find something that way. The one name stuck out for me, however. It also reminded me of the Earth name, Zoey, and that felt so right as I am now. Now I look in the mirror and neither see nor hear anything of Dylan Wilde. A couple nights ago, this realization hit me hard as I began to wonder who or what I even was. How could I accept this new body so easily? Why was everyone so nice to me when I didn’t even know who I was anymore, or were they molding me into some other person at the time? Then I saw a friend of mine in trouble of her own, and so much came clear.”
“How so?”
“Well, details, but I’m just as caring towards my friends as I have always been, except I fell in love with this one as well. My love of history when I was on Earth is still with me now, but here I have so much new history to explore that I ha
d never grown up with like the rest of you had done. I have so many myths to learn and uncover that I don’t even know where to begin. I have a brother and loving parents now, unlike on Earth. I curse those rebels for almost taking them from me when I realized how much I wanted a family.”
“What of your more sexual experiences?”
“What about them?”
“Well, I understand that feelings and sensations all are different between men and women. In Aelf culture it is more than acceptable to have relations with either gender, of course, and the Ginserei have this to a lesser extent. But body chemistry still happens, no matter what race we are. I’m curious if your change in body came with any changes to whatever you’re attracted to.”
“I would be lying if I said I like women and not men, but I also don’t know for sure who or what I like. For the past week I tried not to think about it much, and then, a couple days ago, I found that I have a harder life ahead of me. There is a guy I have my eyes on who looks strong and handsome, and is a charmer when he wants to be, but I don’t know how my friend would feel about it. I don’t know how I would feel about it.”
“Well, you are definitely a beautiful young woman in any case. Your friend is a lucky person to have you.”
Her heart thumped again. There was a ravenous beast in her waiting the pounce on the meat across the desk, but she forced it down and tried her best to pretend that everything was fine. Zoey forced a high volume of air out of her nose, her lips pursed and head shaking.
“I really should talk to her about where we stand,” she said.
The commander said, “I would certainly be interested to know. In any event, what do you know of the Hulda’fi that attacked us?”
“Oh, them? They referred to themselves as a croquet team, I think. Their leader was Soror Valide, and I fought her. She got away after my mom shot off a piece of her mask. I saw a few of them on Earth, including her, at least I’m sure it was, before the building we were in exploded, and I was transported onto this ship.”
Commander Consilius looked at Zoey as though he was buried beneath more answers than he asked for. He set his pen down and marveled at Zoey for a time before he could ask for any more details on all that she had just stated. In the end, Zoey told him all that she could, which was apparently more than he was expecting.
[ 19]
As Zoey entered the residential area of the ship, she noticed Tong-Chang walking into one of the quarters. Zoey dashed toward the door, careful not to be too heavy on her footfalls. She caught the door with one hand before it could close, its sensors causing the entry to slide back open. And then she peeked in.
“Knock, knock?” Zoey said.
There were three beds, all of which were plentiful in width for one person but not another, in addition to the basic facilities for a modest dormitory. Tong-Chang was the sole individual inside, however.
Tong-Chang looked her way and smiled. She said, “Zoey, hi.”
“Is this where you sleep?” Zoey asked.
“It was supposed to be. It’s one of four Cadet Quarters. I haven’t used it much since Admiral and Lady Fjorfolia requested me to assist them during their stay. Now it’ll just be two of us ensigns in here.”
“You’re more than welcome to come to my room if you want. The bed is larger and I would love your company.”
“I will definitely keep that in mind, but tonight will be fine on my own. How are you doing?”
Zoey said, “It’s complicated. I was talking to the commander for a while when I realized I needed to ask you something. What are we?”
“What do you mean?”
“We made love, Tonny. Before that we were friends. You admitted yourself, once before, that we’re still learning about one another. So what are we? Girlfriends? Friends with benefits?”
“Would such a thing bother you?”
“Not in the slightest, but it would be good to know.”
“I’m not sure there’s a good term for what we are right now. I certainly have no plans to have sex with anyone at the moment, and if I did then I might go for you again, unless you decide you want something more than this, whatever it is. I don’t even know how to think of it.”
“Somehow that doesn’t help me feel any better. God, this is so complicated.”
“That would be my fault,” said Tong-Chang. “We were both so vulnerable and needed something, anything, that night in the hotel. Then we kept going until sometime the next day. Now what I feel for you is kinship and adoration, like with any friend, or maybe more. It might be, but it’s too early to tell. It’s too soon since we met one another. I wish I even had the words for how sorry I am, but I need time.”
“As do I. You’re definitely one person I don’t want to lose in my life; one friend I think is worth the effort. I owe you, and my family, for so much.”
“Don’t mention it. They helped me as well, in their own way, when I met them after I cut myself off from my relatives. Perhaps a day will come when you’ll be able to pay forward that kindness and be the right person at the right time. Besides, I know I’m not the only person you’ve had eyes for.”
Zoey blushed and averted her gaze.
“Yeah, I’ve seen how you look at him,” Tong-Chang said.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” said Zoey.
Tong-Chang leaned in closer and whispered in her ear. “I hear Commander Consilius has satisfied every partner. You’re more than welcome to try him out yourself.”
“Tonny, stop.”
“What? It’s your life; your brand new life. Don’t cheat yourself out of living it because you found one thing that you liked at the beginning. Go out and see what the universe has for you.”
“Now who’s giving advice?”
Her friend gave her a simple peck on the lips before she turned back to her own things. Zoey wasn’t sure how happy she was with this entire conversation, and yet she couldn’t help but shake her head in amusement and adoration for Tong-Chang.
* * *
Dasos was sitting in the Hearth Hall at one of the tables. He held a book with one hand, and used his other to type out notes on his digital pad. His typing hand swapped from one electronic index card to another. The cards were part of a filing system that he had put together from a template that reminded him of puzzle games, which was the main reason that he’d chosen it.
Sometimes he thought about refining the system that he had chosen a few revolutions ago, but he never got around to improving what little he knew about programming since he made this system of his. Now, for instance, he needed to concentrate more on reading through a couple reference books and finishing his final essay for class. Then, when he got home, he needed to go back to work for his field assignment and sign up for classes for the next semester.
Suddenly, Zoey sat down across from him at the table. She pressed her chin down atop her folded arms and looked up at Dasos as though she wanted his help with something. He had seen skeelos and felines give that same expression when seeking a scrap of food or head pats.
“What’s up, sis?” he said, pausing his progress on the current book he was on for yet another time during this trip.
She said, “I need advice.”
“OK, what kind of advice?”
“I’m so confused right now. I think I’m in love with Tonny, but she’s in total friend mode at the moment. Then I have the dumbest feelings for someone else every other time I see him, but I don’t really want to pursue them if I can help it. What do I do?”
“That’s something I’m not so sure about. I loved her too, myself. I still do, I think. Tonny probably needs time, as you do. If you feel the need to jump some poor guy’s bones then I’m not going to stop you, but I will ask that you be responsible about it. Oh, right, you said you didn’t want to pursue him. Have you tried talking to Mom and Dad about this? They might be better at this sort of thing than I am.”
“The last thing I need is to risk having them talk about their own sex
lives in great detail. They’re probably doing it right now.”
“I see your point.” For over twenty revolutions Dasos had been blessed with never picturing his parents having sex. That was several revolutions where, by chance and narrow escapes, he’d avoided the thought when Dasos had first learned about the act itself, and how babies were made. Somehow, now, talking to his sister changed that in an instant.
He pressed his head against the table and did his best to flood the imagery out with other thoughts. His groan was an audible one.
“Sorry,” Zoey said.
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