by Melissa Hill
‘But it’s Friday! Maybe a takeaway?’ he suggested with a grin that always had the power to melt her heart. ‘Pizza?’
His eyes sparkled with enthusiasm.
Usually, Annie would have insisted they ate a proper nutritious meal prepared from scratch by her, but she wasn’t sure how many more chances they’d have to order in.
Memories of the hard times began to fill her mind once again. Days of nothing but tinned beans, tuna, and potatoes – and whatever cuts of meat were cheapest or on offer in the supermarkets. She didn’t want that for Charlie. She didn’t want that life again. She couldn’t – wouldn’t – go back to that.
Something had to be done.
The house was a two-bed duplex, and so bright and roomy inside. Annie could still remember what it felt like the first day she walked into it.
There was something about it; something new and fresh and warm, and she knew instantly that this was the place for her and Charlie. This was home.
Now, as she stood in the entrance, she wondered whether whoever came after her would feel the same. Because if the business went under and she had to forgo all her savings to pay her tax bill, she wouldn’t be able to afford this anymore.
‘Mum, I got the menus,’ Charlie shouted from inside the kitchen. Sensing her acquiescence about the takeaway, he’d wasted no time in taking charge before she changed her mind.
She ordered two pizzas in the end. Charlie loved meat, while Annie liked to even out her meat toppings with some veg, something her son – like most five-year-olds – hated, though in fairness he was pretty good with food, and – vegetables aside – not at all fussy. In the early days, he’d had no choice but to eat whatever was available. No such thing as kids’ menus of chicken nuggets and chips or what have you. And despite her gradual change in income and circumstances, old habits died hard and Annie still insisted he eat what she gave him.
‘Don’t forget your drink.’
‘Can I have juice?’
‘Nope. Water or nothing.’
‘Yay, water!’ Charlie quipped, without argument. His cheery temperament had a way of making her feel better even when she wanted to indulge negative thoughts. He truly was her sunshine. He brightened every day, all day.
She badly needed that now.
‘Hey, Mum, are we going on holiday?’ he asked, picking up the invite to Villa Dolce Vita, along with the hotel info that had been sitting on the kitchen counter since she’d brought it home a couple of weeks ago. ‘It says my name on this.’
Annie’s heart turned over. ‘I don’t think so, love.’
‘Why not? It looks nice. Callum’s going to Spain on his summer holidays this year – a big water park with loads of slides. Is there loads of slides there, too?’
‘Not really. That hotel is very different to where Callum is going, definitely no water park, though there is a pool. And that’s not for a summer holiday either, just a weekend.’
‘But I want to go.’
Annie’s smiled tightened. ‘I’ll think about it, OK? Now, eat up and then go and put your pyjamas on, and maybe you can watch a bit of Paw Patrol before you go to bed.’
‘Yay!’
Annie didn’t rush her shower that evening. She usually did, not wanting to leave Charlie on his own for too long in case he got up to any devilment, but tonight she needed every second of that warm water on her head and shoulders.
A migraine was still lingering, but not nearly as bad as when she’d had angry suppliers (and Lauren) in her ear.
Charlie helped with easing her worries, too. He helped with so much and he didn’t even realise it. Her son had the knack of doing the silliest things at just the right time to make her laugh.
Despite all the early hardship, he was her greatest blessing, really.
‘Mum, I’m waiting!’ he called out from his room now.
‘In a sec,’ she answered as she towelled off her hair and pulled an oversized T-shirt over her head.
She headed towards Charlie’s room but stopped short when she heard her phone beep, indicating an incoming message. Her heart hammered.
Hoping it was the reply she’d been hoping for, she rushed back to check but it was just a text from Nick.
Hope you’re feeling a bit better about everything. Just wanted to say that I’ll come along to the bank with you next week for moral support if you like?
Swallowing back her disappointment, Annie smiled. Nick was a great friend and she was lucky to have him in her corner.
‘Mum!’ Charlie called out again. ‘Hurry, it’s creepy in here.’
‘How on earth can your own bedroom be creepy?’ Annie asked, coming in and sitting on his bed.
‘It’s too quiet, like one of those scary movies.’
‘Ah, Charlie, I told you not to watch those movies with Callum, didn’t I? You’re too young for that stuff.’
‘I know, but I couldn’t help it. They were just on. Mum, can I have two stories tonight, please, please?’
‘I don’t know, hon, I’ve had a very rough day and I’m tired. I had to make a lot of calls to a lot of people.’ She sighed. ‘There are a lot of people angry at Mummy at the moment.’
‘Why would anyone be angry at you?’ he asked, concerned. ‘You’re brilliant.’
She smiled, despite herself. ‘I’m glad you think so,’ she said as she hugged him. ‘I wish more people did.’
‘Nick thinks so,’ he told her seriously.
Annie looked at him. ‘How do you know that?’
‘I heard him say it just the other day at Gemma’s house.’
‘Really?’ She really hoped that Nick wasn’t talking to his sister about her financial problems in front of her son. She didn’t want Charlie to pick up on any issues. ‘You heard them talking about me?’ she questioned. ‘What else did you hear?’
‘Nothing.’ He shrugged. ‘Me and Callum just went outside to play football then.’
She tucked Charlie in, snuggling under the covers and nestling him into the crook of her arm as she read him a story while he drifted off.
When he was finally asleep, she stroked his hair and eased herself out from beneath him, studying his face as she watched him sleep.
He looked so like his father sometimes it killed her.
Going back downstairs in her bare feet, Annie padded into the kitchen, then went to the fridge and poured herself an extra-large glass of wine.
After the week she’d just had, it was badly needed.
Chapter 46
‘Mum?’ Charlie called out blearily from the bottom of the stairs. It was the following morning and Annie was sitting at the breakfast bar in her pyjamas. ‘You’re not dressed.’
She looked up and smiled. ‘I’m not going into work today, love. I’m staying home with you instead.’
The look on her son’s face said it all. A bright smile lit up his features, causing Annie to smile, too.
‘Really? You’re not going into the salon?’
‘Nope.’
The salon was the last place she wanted to be today. Saturday was their busiest day, of course, but there was no point in her sitting in the office, stressing over things she couldn’t control. She’d done enough of that.
Besides, there was something else she needed to take care of.
‘But you never take a day off,’ Charlie continued, shocked.
‘What? Should I change my mind and go to work instead?’ she teased.
‘No!’ he shouted as he ran and threw his arms around her with a laugh. ‘No way!’
Again, Annie felt guilty because of all the long hours at the salon that had taken her away from Charlie, but there had been no other option.
She was the only one who was going to provide for him. In recent years she’d managed to carve out more time, but it would never quell the regret she felt for having been so absent in his life as a toddler while she tried to make a go of #GlamSquad.
He was the reason she’d worked so hard in the first place, and why sh
e’d been so absolutely determined to see her (and Felicity’s) original plan through, despite her unexpected pregnancy.
‘How about a nice walk after breakfast?’ she suggested, kissing him on the cheek. ‘And then maybe a movie later?’
‘In the day?’ he questioned, wide-eyed. ‘But you never let me watch TV in the daytime.’
‘Well, today is a new day,’ Annie declared, as her phone dinged.
Her breath caught in her throat as she glanced at the screen alert to find a reply to the email she’d sent the day before had finally arrived.
Free to talk now if you like. What’s this about?
Followed by a number for her to call.
Annie’s heart thumped with both fear and shame as she realised she was really going to do this. She had to.
‘Love, tell you what – I’ve just got to make a quick phone call. How about you chill out for a bit, maybe do some colouring and then we’ll head out for our walk, OK?’
‘Maybe some cartoons instead?’ He grinned, ever the negotiator, and she distractedly smiled back, her emotions all over the place. ‘Just for a little while. But then we go for a walk, OK? It’s a beautiful day out.’
He scurried off into the living room, pleased at the unexpected opportunity to watch TV.
For a few moments, Annie busied herself in the kitchen with tidying up, hoping that the run-of-the-mill activity might settle her shaking hands.
And when she was sure Charlie was settled in front of the TV and well out of earshot, she dialled the number.
‘You told me once that if I ever needed anything for Charlie, that you would help. Well, I need that now …’ Annie couldn’t believe how normal she sounded as she explained her situation, as if this was no big deal.
She hated, hated lowering herself to this, the idea of being beholden to anyone.
It was possibly her lowest moment yet.
A deep sigh on the other end. ‘I understand, and I’m sorry but … the timing is not good.’
At this she began to shake with fury. As if this was something she could control!
Well, fuck that. And boo hoo.
‘Are you serious? I never had the luxury of deciding when or if the timing was good. No, I was too busy trying to keep my head above water, trying to keep me and Charlie going when we had no one else. And now, the only time I ever ask you for help, you throw it back in my face?’
‘I’m sorry. Truly, I’d love to do what I can to help, but like I said, it’s just a very bad time …’
She couldn’t believe how anyone could be so goddamn cool, so unaffected by her plight or her request.
‘So after all your promises, and my keeping quiet all these years so you can maintain your sweet life, you’re telling me that you’re just going to turn your back on it all now – on your own son?’
Annie was so enraged, she hung up the phone without even waiting for an answer. But she’d got her answer, hadn’t she? There would be no help forthcoming from Charlie’s father, despite his promises and so-called best intentions.
She was on her own. Same as always.
‘Mum?’ Her son reappeared in the kitchen doorway, concern written all over his small face. ‘Why are you crying?’
Was she? Annie didn’t even realise. She put a hand up to her face, finding that yes, she was indeed crying.
‘It’s nothing, sweetheart. Someone just upset me, that’s all.’
‘Who upset you? Someone on the phone? Who was it?’
‘Just … something to do with work, pet. Nothing for you to worry about.’
‘But I am worried. You look like Callum’s sister when she broke up with her boyfriend. She said she had a broken heart. You don’t have a broken heart, do you, Mum? Uncle Nick didn’t break up with you, did he?’
Nick? What the hell was he talking about?
She knew her single status was a curiosity to Charlie, especially when he was so involved with his childminder’s more traditional family, and knew it couldn’t be easy for him growing up without a dad when Gemma’s husband Hugh worked from home and thus was heavily involved in family life.
Annie vaguely remembered what it was like for her without parents before the O’Dohertys and she definitely remembered the void that had been left in her life when her father died when she was a teen.
Charlie had asked only once about his father, though, and Annie had told him the truth, because there was simply no reason not to.
‘I met your father in Italy,’ she’d explained. ‘I was on holiday there one summer with my friends.’ She could still recall the melancholy in her own voice as she spoke.
‘Was he nice?’ Charlie asked simply. ‘What was he like?’
Annie sighed. ‘He was nice.’
‘And what did he look like?’
‘Tall and handsome with a smile very like yours.’
Charlie grinned happily, showing that same smile.
‘Why isn’t he here now?’ he asked innocently.
Annie tried to choose her words carefully. ‘The trip came to an end, and I came back here to Ireland. I never saw him again.’
‘But didn’t you love him, the man from Italy?’
Annie took a deep breath.
‘No,’ she said. ‘I didn’t really know him well enough to love him,’ she told him honestly. She brushed a lock of hair away from his forehead. ‘It doesn’t matter anyway. You and me – we’re happy together just the two of us, aren’t we? We don’t need anyone else.’
He had a look on his face that almost broke Annie’s heart in two. ‘I s’pose.’
The man from Italy …
Thinking about that memory now, she recalled his excitement about Kim’s launch invite yesterday and his insistence that he wanted to go.
Had he in his own little way managed to put two and two together?
‘I’m sorry if somebody broke your heart, Mum,’ Charlie said now, continuing to hug Annie’s legs, while she dried her eyes and moved to compose herself.
‘Nobody broke my heart, love,’ she reassured him truthfully.
Instead she was angry – seriously angry.
Annie moved to the countertop and snatched up the package that Kim had sent them.
Before now, the thought of going to Italy for the launch hadn’t seriously entered her mind.
But after that call, she just might do it. There was nothing to lose anymore.
Her life was about to go up in flames anyway.
No harm to escape from her troubles for a while. They’d still be there no matter what she did, even if the salon wasn’t, she thought ruefully.
She’d go to the bank on Monday with Nick and see if they could secure enough to at least keep them going for another while.
Either way, to hell with it. She’d go to Italy for a few days, and take Charlie with her – he’d jump at the opportunity for a rare all-expenses-paid break in the sun.
His very first holiday, and since she might never be able to take him on another …
Yes, why shouldn’t she go along to the launch at Villa Dolce Vita, Annie decided, and reunite with that summer’s old friends.
And foes.
Chapter 47
Now
Excitement bubbled over inside Colette as she waited in Naples for the train to Sorrento.
She still couldn’t believe she was here, back on the Amalfi Coast after all these years.
She really needed this, perhaps more than she realised. And she was almost glad Ed wasn’t going to be able to make it until the day of the party, allowing her more time to relax and catch up with Kim, and hopefully Annie, too.
There was just too much going on at home, and after her last disappointment, it would be a relief to get out of London for a while.
She stood and watched the tracks, waiting for the train’s impending arrival. She’d taken the very same ride almost six years before, and she could still vividly remember the emotions that had filled her back then.
Italy had been like a dream
, really. She’d been so naïve back then, inexperienced in both life and love.
She’d never dreamed that things would’ve turned out the way they did. That this was the place where Colette’s heart had been broken, yet where her ultimate love story had begun.
Ed didn’t really see it like that, of course. He wasn’t romantic. He tried, but big gestures of affection weren’t something that came naturally to him. She understood. It was OK.
That day in St James’s Park had been a nice, though short-lived, diversion. Still, she appreciated the effort he had made.
A little while later, Colette picked up a taxi upon arriving at the station in Sorrento, and found herself chuckling as her driver immediately reminded her of Jacopo that first day when he’d taken her to Delfino.
There was a smile on her face as the memory of that visit to the restaurant returned, when she’d been so unsure of herself and full of wonder and awe at her surroundings.
She wondered if Mama Elene was still there and even whether Delfino was still open. Luca’s face suddenly flashed before her then. His incredible smile and piercing blue eyes were vivid in her memories.
Was he still here in Positano? Had he finally done what Mama Elene had teased him about and settled down? Got married to Lidia, maybe, or some other gorgeous Italian girl worthy of his true affections, once he’d got bored of charming gullible tourists?
There was no way of knowing, of course. A lot could’ve changed and probably had, but Colette hoped at least that the little slice of heaven that was Delfino hadn’t.
Impulsively asking the taxi for a diversion from her original destination, she sat back and stared out the window, wondering what the hell she was doing.
‘Wait for me,’ she instructed him a little while later, as she closed the car door and walked hesitantly down the laneway towards the familiar entrance.
It was just the same. Nothing had changed at all and Colette was happy to see that. A large smile painted her features as she stepped inside, fully expecting to see Mama Elene behind the counter.
‘Welcome to Delfino. Table for one?’
Colette looked at the much younger Italian woman. ‘Hi. No, actually, I was just wondering if Mama Elene was here? I’m an old friend.’