“Not even a little. I’m not ready for babies yet. Ouch,” Danica exclaimed.
“What?”
“Your arm is locked into mine so tightly it’s pinching.” Danica unlinked her arm from Kaylie’s and rubbed her forearm. “You okay?”
“Just a little stressed,” Kaylie admitted.
“Mom can have that effect.” Danica pulled open the doors and waited for Kaylie to enter the restaurant.
Love handles can have that effect.
Kaylie knew that Danica had remained in contact with their mother and that she’d never felt the resentment toward her that Kaylie had after their parents’ divorce. Danica didn’t see their mother very often, either, and Kaylie wondered why and if Danica felt the same type of the anxiety she did. She didn’t appear to, and there was no way Kaylie was going to bring it up. For the longest time, Danica had pestered Kaylie about not cutting their mother out of her life, and she didn’t feel like revisiting that conversation. While Danica had once been a great therapist, Kaylie was an expert at dodging advice and, eventually, she’d made her sister so upset about the whole thing that Danica had given up trying to force her to make amends. Kaylie wanted to keep it that way.
It was Sunday afternoon and Felby’s, one of the nicer restaurants in the small touristy town of Allure, Colorado, wasn’t nearly as busy as it would be in a few short weeks. August was the calm before the storm. Soon, SUVs would fill the streets and tourists would overtake the ski slopes during the day and the restaurants and the Village at night.
Kaylie scanned the restaurant for her mother’s smart blunt cut and structured button-down shirt. Her mother’s hair was the same buttery shade of blond as Kaylie’s, and the more she looked for it, the more uneasy she felt. “I don’t see her. Maybe she cancelled. Did you check your messages?”
“You wish.” Danica laughed.
“She’s not gonna be happy to see me. I haven’t seen her in almost a year.” Kaylie stepped back and looked at Danica’s low-rise shorts and cute tank top. She’d definitely lost weight, and her springy dark curls had grown over the past few months, making her look even younger than Kaylie. Kaylie felt the fangs of jealousy taking hold.
“Don’t be silly. You know Mom. She’ll act like it’s no big deal. She’s never put you on the spot—ever. There’s no reason to think she will now. There she is.” Danica waved at a booth in the corner.
“That’s not Mom,” Kaylie said, looking at the red-haired woman in the corner booth.
Danica headed for the booth. “Of course it is.”
Kaylie followed and, as she neared the booth, she realized it was her mother after all. Her hair had grown at least two inches, brushing her shoulders, and it was definitely not buttery blond.
“Red?” Kaylie asked, tossing her purse onto the bench across from her mother.
“Hello to you, too, Kaylie,” her mother said.
She winced at her mother’s sharp retort and cast an I-told-you-so glance at her sister.
Her mother stood and hugged them both. “You look radiant, sweetheart,” she said to Kaylie. Helen Snow had been the epitome of the doting mother. She’d baked weekly, had made Kaylie and Danica special outfits, and had never missed a PTA meeting. She reached out now and touched Kaylie’s stomach. “Look at my baby, having a baby. And you—” she held her hands out, as if presenting a beautiful painting— “doesn’t love suit you well!”
Kaylie watched Danica’s face flush with embarrassment. It had been a huge deal when she first met Blake. He’d been one of Danica’s therapy clients, and from the moment they’d set eyes on each other—Danica told Kaylie later—she knew her life would never be the same. The attraction was undeniable, and not just because he was tall, dark, and devastatingly handsome. He was also kind and honest, and Danica told Kaylie that when she was around him, she felt her heart and mind open wide, and her very being felt lighter. Kaylie had been happy for her then, but now, after seeing the changes in Danica’s personality, she knew her sister had done the right thing by giving up her therapy license and opening a youth center instead. What pleased Kaylie even more was watching her sister allow herself to be loved, and by someone as clearly in love with her as was Blake.
Kaylie scooted onto the bench across from her mother and Danica. The glances from the two men at a neighboring table brought a smile to Kaylie’s lips. She spread her napkin across her lap, securing it below the bubble of her belly with a proud lifting of her chin. Maybe Chaz was right after all, and I’ve still got it.
“How are my girls?”
Her mother’s radiant skin and fresh hair color painted an image of a completely new person, one Kaylie didn’t recognize. Where was the efficiently dowdy classroom parent? The mother who baked every week and never said a terse word? Just seeing her brought the pain of her parents’ divorce rushing back. Kaylie had been in college when they separated, and she’d found out a few months later that her mother had known about her father’s mistress for years, but she’d stayed with him for Danica’s and Kaylie’s sakes. Now all she could think of was how weak her mother had been to remain in a broken marriage. As she looked over her mother’s new image, and rested her hand on her belly, she couldn’t help but think about how much had changed over the past year.
One thing would never change, though, as far as Kaylie was concerned. She’d learned a lot from her mother. The biggest lesson, however, came from the divorce. The other shoe can always drop.
“The youth center is doing great,” Danica began. “I think we made the right call naming it No Limitz. It’s flashy and really does speak to the nature of helping young people to grow and realize their potential. The new logo design just came in. It seems like it took forever, but I think making the z yellow and the other letters blue really worked out well. I love the kids, and, Mom, I never realized how much of a downer it was to do therapy every day. It was like a huge weight was lifted when I left that career behind.”
Danica was positively glowing, and Kaylie felt another familiar twinge of jealousy. Danica had transitioned from a career as a therapist to opening a youth center without so much as a headache, while it seemed to Kaylie that she’d had to work twice as hard to make a name for herself in the music industry. Granted, she was a singer at events and restaurants, not a pop star, but still, she was proud of her accomplishments. She couldn’t help but feel a bit resentful as her sister’s career flourished and hers faltered.
“I know, and I’m sorry that your father and I pushed you in that direction for so long.” A forced smile quickly replaced the momentary regret that flashed in her mother’s eyes.
“Are you kidding? I loved being a therapist, and I appreciate that you and Dad pushed me hard to do my best. I think those skills helped me not only in my personal life, but also at No Limitz. It’s just that, now, I see what else is out there, and I can see what I was missing. When I was a therapist, if I bumped into a client out in public, I had to pretend I wasn’t a real person with a real life. Now, I don’t have to duck into any corners.” Danica took a sip of water.
“You gave up your therapy license so quickly after meeting Blake. Do you have any regrets? Do you ever miss your practice?” her mother asked.
After Danica had met Blake, Kaylie had seen her change in ways she never even imagined her sister could—much less might want to. She’d gone from being a conservative, semi-uptight therapist to a relaxed woman who allowed herself to be more spontaneous, and to give in to her inner woman a little more. Okay, a lot more.
“Honestly, no. I’m the happiest I think I’ve ever been. I never realized how I was always at the ready—like at any second, I’d have to go all cover ops when I was out in public. Talk about strangled by your career.”
“And she’s got a hunky man to boot,” Kaylie added.
“That I do,” Danica agreed.
“And you, Kaylie? How are things? How do you feel?”
She sat on pins and needles, just waiting for her mother to call her out for not making
an effort to see her in so long. “I feel good, healthwise, and I think we’re about as ready to meet this baby as we will ever be.” She patted her belly. “But my career has tanked, and I don’t have any alternatives at the moment.” Kaylie hated the pouty, needy sound of her voice.
“That’s not true,” Danica said.
“Are you getting fewer singing jobs now that you’re so far along?” her mother asked.
Kaylie nodded as her mother reached across the table for her hand.
“Kaylie, that’s all part of being pregnant. It’s not that you’re not a good singer anymore. It’s just that the jobs that you were used to securing cater to a…” Her mother looked at Danica for insight.
“Racier, not-yet-settled-down, crowd,” Danica offered.
“Younger, prettier, sexier. I know. I know. That doesn’t make it any easier for me.” Kaylie took a drink of water to settle the emotions that had been on overdrive since she got pregnant. “I knew this would happen. I mean, I didn’t think I’d be singing in bars at eight months pregnant. I just didn’t think it would be so hard to secure jobs for after the baby’s born. But” —sending her index finger toward the ceiling, she feigned a smile— “on the plus side, I have more time to prepare for my little one and plenty of time to spend with my hunky man.” She tried to convince herself as much as the two of them.
A slim young waitress came to their table. “Hi, I’m India, and I’ll be your server today.” She looked at the three women and said to Danica, “I just love your hair.”
Danica touched her curls. “Really? Thank you. It’s a mop.”
When did Danica learn chatty girl skills? “I’ll have an iced tea and grilled chicken salad, no onions, please,” Kaylie said.
Danica shot her a that was rude glare, which Kaylie skillfully ignored.
A cell phone rang, and all three women reached into their purses.
“It’s mine,” their mom chimed in.
The girls exchanged a curious glance.
“Hi. Yes. Oh, I’d love that. Okay.” Their mother’s cheeks reddened, and she lowered her voice. “I can’t wait to see you either. Okay, bye.”
“Who was that?” Kaylie and Danica asked in unison.
Their mom stuffed her phone back into her purse and folded her hands on the table. “That was…” She took a sip of water. “Well, there’s no easy way to say this. I’m dating.”
“Mom, that’s great!” Danica embraced her.
“Dating?” Kaylie asked.
“Kaylie, she’s allowed to have a life.”
“I know. It’s just weird. The last time I saw you—”
“Which was exactly eleven months ago,” her mother said.
Here it comes.
Her mother’s phone chirped again, and she dug through her purse and took it out, read a text, and responded as Kaylie spoke.
“It has been a long time, and I’m sorry. I've been so wrapped up in...” Chaz, the baby’s room, my failing career. “Anyway, you weren’t dating, and you didn’t have a cell phone. Or red hair.” Why am I being such a bitch? She watched her mother smile as her fingers moved in rapid succession on her tiny touch screen. “You text now, too?” Dear God, shoot me now. Make my bitchiness stop.
“If you had returned my calls, you’d have known this. A lot has changed, and I know it’s a lot to take in.” She touched her hair. “My hair, that was a suggestion from a new friend of mine, Mamie Jones. We were at the gym—”
“You go to a gym?” This just keeps getting better and better.
“I’m pushing sixty, so yes, I do. It’s good for osteoporosis. My doctor recommended some light weight-work. Anyway, I met Mamie there. She’s divorced, a few years longer than me, but we have a lot in common. She suggested a fresh start, and I thought, what could it hurt?”
“So, you dyed your hair, joined a gym, and who’s the guy who called? Who’s texting?” Kaylie asked, thinking of her mother’s thin, frayed voice when she’d called to tell Kaylie about her father leaving. There wasn’t a trace of that frail woman sitting before her now, and she didn’t know whether to be happy for her or curl into a ball and wish for her mommy to come back.
“His name is Patrick, and he’s a very nice man. He’s a banker. Very stable. Divorced five years.”
“Oh, Mom, that’s wonderful. You deserve to be happy.” Danica kicked Kaylie under the table.
Kaylie shook off her surprise. “You do deserve to be happy. I’m sorry, Mom. It’s just that my life is becoming a bit stagnant, and you and Danica are moving forward. It’s just hard for me. We haven’t seen each other, and suddenly, everything’s different. I mean, you’re dating. Wow.”
“And you’re having a baby. There’s nothing more wonderful than giving birth and starting a family.”
“I know, you’re right, but I do miss working. I didn’t expect my entire life to change after the baby came.”
Danica and her mother exchanged a look, and Kaylie bit her tongue.
“Kaylie, this is just a new, different path for you to take. That’s all. You’ll get used to it. You’ll be proud of it. It’s the best time of your life.”
Best time of my life? What was the last ten years? “It’s just a tad overwhelming. Chaz is going out to LA soon, and I worry about” —she leaned across the table and whispered— “how unattractive I am.” She sat back and tossed her hair over her shoulder. “My ankles swell by dinnertime, my career sucks right now, and I’m exhausted by the evening.” She never thought she’d be the one ragging about her life.
“By the way, when do I get to meet the handsome prince?” her mother asked.
Her mother had never coddled her when it came to her looks, and Kaylie had to remind herself of that as she bristled from her mother’s blatant disregard for those concerns. Had it been a different time, when they’d been closer and seen each other more regularly, her mother might have rolled her eyes and quipped, Pull up your big girl panties. There are more important things in this world than how you look. Now that acknowledgment felt like a missing limb.
Kaylie and Chaz had moved in together right after she found out she was pregnant, and they’d been so wrapped up in each other that introducing her mother had slipped her mind. She wondered what that said about her relationship with her mother. “We’ll figure out a time soon. I promise. He’s swamped getting ready for the film festival. I never realized that being the director of the festival meant that he’d travel so much. I thought a director would just…direct.” Chaz ran the Colorado Indie Film Festival, which meant overseeing every aspect from securing funds for sponsors to wining and dining celebrity speakers. While he had a small staff to oversee each of the major areas, with the festival just around the corner, securing sponsors had become a major deal. Without sponsor funding—some in excess of ten thousand dollars—the festival could not take place.
Her mother took a drink. “Have you spoken to your father? Does he know about the baby?”
How could she be so comfortable asking about him? “No, I haven’t spoken to him. You know that. He’s got whatever her name is. He’s made his choice.” Her father had married his mistress two years after leaving their mother, and Kaylie hadn’t gone to the wedding or returned his phone calls since. Holiday cards were thrown out unread and, as far as she was concerned, and much to her mother’s dismay, he no longer existed to Kaylie—and the halfsibling he claimed she has, didn’t either. Danica, on the other hand, continued to write to her father on occasion, but as far as Kaylie knew, Danica hadn’t seen him in person or spoken to him on the phone since he moved away.
“Oh, Kaylie. You really shouldn’t be like that. Your father loves you.”
“Mom, it’s hard for her,” Danica said in Kaylie’s defense. “It’s hard for both of us.”
“You too?” her mother asked.
“I send holiday cards,” Danica said.
Kaylie changed the subject. “I think I need a girls’ night.”
“When’s the last time you saw Camille
and the girls? I talked to her mother about two months ago. She said their new house is to die for,” their mother said.
“I haven’t seen her in a while, but we talk on the phone, and we text.” Kaylie realized that it had been quite a while since they’d actually seen each other.
“I’ll put together a girls’ night. Would that be okay? We can go into the Village to one of the great little cafés.” Danica took out her cell phone to check her schedule. “Blake can do something with Chaz that night. It’ll be fun.”
“I don’t want to go to a café. I want to go to Bar None,” Kaylie whined.
Danica lowered her phone, and her jaw followed. “You’re pregnant. You can’t drink.”
“I don’t want to drink.” Kaylie felt life breathe back into her lungs. Her words tumbled out, driven by a rush of adrenaline over the thought of going out and having fun with her girlfriends. She didn’t realize how much she missed going out with them until just then. “I just want to hang out and have fun, listen to good music. I want to feel alive and attractive, instead of pregnant and tired. Besides, it’s proving harder to secure singing jobs for after the baby is born than I thought it would be. Maybe if we put our heads together we can figure out how to make that happen.”
Their mother smiled. “That’s my girl. You always knew how to spin things positive.”
Kaylie hugged her mother goodbye and promised she’d make an effort to stay in closer contact with her. She hoped, as she watched her mother walk away, that she would make the effort. But some days, it was just so damn hard to think of her mother and not have that pang of anger slogging down her best intentions.
“Even her walk looks different,” she said, cocking her head to the side.
“You think so? I think she’s just happy.” Danica took out her keys. “Do you want me to call the girls?”
“Do I ever,” Kaylie said with a sigh. The men from the neighboring table walked out of the restaurant and eyed Kaylie and Danica. Kaylie smiled.
“Kaylie!” Danica gave her a stern look. “You are incorrigible.”
Sisters in Bloom Page 2