Tomorrow's Lullaby

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Tomorrow's Lullaby Page 14

by Lindzee Armstrong


  “Don’t stop on my account,” he said. “I’m here to work on homework, not keep you from practicing.”

  “Sorry there’s not a chair in here.”

  “Don’t worry about it.” Aaron pulled off his jacket and tossed it to the floor, then sank on top of it, his back resting against the wall and long legs splayed in front of him. He opened his backpack and pulled out a textbook. The tattoo on his bicep flashed with the movement.

  “What does your tattoo say?” Sienna asked.

  “What? Oh.” He lifted his sleeve, showing her the tattoo. Intricate cursive swirled around his arm.

  “Forgiveness is the final form of love,” sh read. Hope fluttered in Sienna’s heart. Maybe telling him about Hunter wouldn’t be so difficult after all. “Who said that?”

  “A man named Reinhold Niebuhr. He was a theologian.”

  “When did you get it?” Sienna asked. What she really wanted to ask was why?

  “Not long before moving here. I was really struggling with negative feelings toward my family—birth and adoptive—and it was destroying me. I wanted a constant reminder to try and move past it.”

  “And has it helped?”

  “Mostly. I’m not all the way there yet. But I hope I will be one day.”

  “Have you had any luck finding your birth mother?”

  “Not yet. But my photo’s been shared almost a thousand times. That’s got to count for something.” He brought her hand to his mouth and paced a soft kiss in her palm. “Now get practicing. You won’t let me come back if you don’t get something done.”

  Sienna gave him a grateful smile and turned back to the piano. She would tell him about Hunter this weekend. That would give her a few days to plan the perfect reveal.

  She blocked out the world as she practiced, focusing on finger movement and memorization. After another hour, her fingers were stiff, and her back ached. She switched to Aaron’s Melody for a cool down. The notes were easy, the melody beautiful in its simplicity. She paused, grabbing a pencil to add in a chord on the sheet music, then continued playing. The new section sounded just as breathtaking in real life as it had in her head, a gentle crescendo that built in passion, much like her first kiss with Aaron.

  She held the last note, then stood, cracking her back.

  “You are amazing,” Aaron said.

  Sienna jumped, nearly bumping into him in the confined space. He wrapped his arms around her waist, and she blushed, hiding her face against his shoulder. “Thank you,” she said.

  “What was that last piece? I loved it.”

  “I wrote it,” she confessed.

  He nuzzled her neck, his breath hot and enticing. “It’s nice. What inspired the song?”

  “You.” And then they were kissing again.

  Several moments later, Sienna pulled away. “I’ve got to go home. Jared’s picking me up in an hour.”

  Aaron groaned. “You had to ruin it, didn’t you?”

  Sienna lightly hit him on the chest. “I’ll tell him as soon as he gets there. I can’t actually go out on the date with him.”

  “You’ll call me afterward? Maybe there will still be time to do homework together.”

  “I’ll call you,” Sienna said.

  Liv wasn’t home, so Sienna had the apartment to herself. She freshened up a bit, but didn’t try too hard—it seemed wrong to get all dolled up for a goodbye.

  The knock at the door immediately sent Sienna’s legs trembling. She’d never broken up with someone before. And while she hadn’t been exclusive with Jared, she knew he liked her a lot more than she liked him.

  Sienna opened the door, feeling even worse when she saw how nice Jared looked. He wore khaki slacks and a light green button-up shirt, his hair neatly combed. Always so put-together. Always a gentleman.

  It would’ve been so much easier if she’d fallen for him.

  “Hey,” Jared said, giving her a hug. “Are you ready to go?”

  Sienna took a deep breath, shutting the door behind him. “Actually, can we talk first?”

  Jared’s brow furrowed, and she could see in his eyes that he knew. “That doesn’t sound good.”

  “Let’s sit down.” Sienna sank next to him on the couch, angling her body to face his. She wanted to look away, to talk to the wall or his left ear or something. But he deserved more than that. “I don’t know how to say this. You’re a great guy, Jared—one of the best. And I’ve really enjoyed our time together.”

  He folded his arms, eyes guarded. “You’re breaking up with me.”

  “I guess so. I’m so sorry. I don’t feel as strongly about our relationship as I think you do, and I have feelings for someone else.”

  “Aaron.” His shoulders slumped, and his voice was resigned.

  Sienna swallowed hard and nodded. “Please know that I didn’t try to lead you on. I only made my decision last night.”

  “I can’t say I’m surprised. I’ve seen how you look at him. As much as I wanted us to work, I knew even last spring that you weren’t fully invested.”

  “I wanted to be.”

  Jared took her hand in his, rubbing a thumb over her knuckles. “If I’d been more attentive that month you were gone, would it have made a difference?”

  “I don’t know,” Sienna said. If they’d been a couple, would she have even noticed Aaron? Probably. But would she have broken up with Jared to be with him?

  “I can’t believe I screwed up my chance,” Jared said.

  “Don’t think like that. You are such a good guy. I tried so hard to make our relationship work. Please believe that.”

  “I do. Are you absolutely positive about your decision?”

  Sienna thought of the next hurdle in her relationship with Aaron—telling him about Hunter. After seeing his tattoo, she hoped it wouldn’t be a deal breaker. Aaron was a good person, and she knew his feelings for her were as strong as hers were for him. But there was always the chance that as soon as she told him, he’d break up with her.

  “Yes.” She bit her lip, not sure how to tell Jared, but knowing she wanted to. “There’s something in my past . . . something no one here knows about but Liv and Pastor Tanner. Aaron might not be able to handle it. But I believe in him and want to give him the benefit of the doubt. It’s not fair to you for us to keep dating, when I know in my heart it won’t work.”

  Jared swallowed. His eyes were tinged red, and her heart ached for the pain she was causing him.

  “I can respect that. And I appreciate your honesty. If he’s any kind of man at all, whatever you tell him won’t matter.” Jared leaned forward and kissed her cheek. “It wouldn’t have mattered to me.”

  “I know.” Sienna’s voice caught. “That’s part of what’s making this so hard.”

  “I’m probably a glutton for punishment, but if you change your mind, I’m here and waiting. At least for a while.”

  “Thank you, Jared.” They both stood, and Sienna hugged him tightly. “You’ve been such a good friend to me.”

  “I’m going to miss hanging out with you.”

  “Me too.”

  Sienna walked Jared to the door and gave him one more hug. Then she watched him disappear down the stairs. At the bottom, he stopped and looked up, raising a hand in a farewell gesture. Sienna waved back, then shut the door, slumping against it.

  Maybe she should tell Aaron about Hunter tonight and get all the difficult discussions out of the way in one swoop.

  No. She needed to plan the perfect date for them, set the mood, and then tell him. She felt no need to defend her choice to Aaron—it had been the right one for her. But she did want to explain it in a way he’d understand.

  The door opened, pressing against Sienna. She lurched forward, scrambling to her feet.

  Liv peered inside, an eyebrow raised. “Are you okay?”

  “Yeah. Sorry.”

  “What were you doing?”

  “Feeling awful for breaking up with Jared.”

  “I thought I saw his ca
r leaving. Looks like you need a hug.”

  Liv pulled Sienna in for an embrace, squeezing tight. Sienna closed her eyes, grateful for the support.

  “Thanks,” Sienna said. “I know it was the right thing to do, but it was hard.”

  “How’d he take it?”

  “Better than I expected. But now I have to tell Aaron about Hunter. Soon.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “No. But if he can’t accept that part of me, it’s better we break up now, before either of us gets more hurt.”

  “True.”

  “You have to help me. I want to plan the perfect date and tell him this weekend. Aaron’s a good guy, and he’s trying to get over his adoption hang-ups. If I explain it right, he’ll understand my side of the story.”

  “What did you have in mind?”

  “This is a nice restaurant,” Aaron said, craning his neck to take in the turrets. A fountain gurgled softly in the courtyard. The cool October breeze sliced through Sienna’s lace jacket, and she shivered.

  “I should’ve known,” Sienna said. “Eldon’s loaded. Liv said he wanted to take us all out.”

  “No way am I letting some other guy pay for my girlfriend’s dinner.”

  “I don’t know, Aaron. This place looks pricey.”

  A man in a tuxedo held open one of the ten-foot arched wooden doors. Classical music floated through the speakers, and the hostess gave them an appraising glance. Sienna had felt pretty when she slipped into her nicest black dress, usually reserved for when she played at wedding receptions. It was simple v-neck, with a flowy A-line skirt and beaded belt. Now she felt shabby and under dressed.

  “Do you have a reservation?” the woman asked, scowling.

  “Yes,” Sienna said. “We’re meeting Eldon . . .” She floundered, realizing she had no idea what his last name was.

  The hostess’s face instantly relaxed into an over-the-top smile. “Mr. Ashmore, of course. Right this way.”

  Aaron raised an eyebrow, and Sienna shrugged. They followed the hostess to a private alcove near the back of the restaurant. Sienna froze, her hand on Aaron’s arm. Liv and a man she presumed was Eldon were locked in a passionate embrace, their lips devouring each other.

  The hostess cleared her throat, and the two sprang apart.

  “The rest of your party has arrived,” the hostess said.

  “Excellent.” Eldon’s voice was crisp and clear. He was handsome in a mature kind of way, with thinning hair and faint crow’s feet around his eyes.

  Liv pulled out a compact and daintily wiped at the corner of her mouth with one finger. Sienna glanced over at Aaron, who looked like he was trying not to laugh. She looked away, her own mirth bubbling forth. Liv had no shame.

  “Glad you guys could make it,” Liv said, and introductions were made.

  Sienna slid into the booth, and Aaron sat beside her.

  “It’s nice to finally meet you, Eldon,” Sienna said. “Liv’s told me a lot about you.” Or about what kind of a kisser he was, at least. Sienna really could’ve done without seeing that first-hand.

  Eldon gave a lazy smile and played with a lock of Liv’s hair. “She does like to talk.”

  Wow. What a charmer. Sienna opened the menu, and her eyes widened. One entrée was the equivalent of a week’s wages at Dillard’s.

  Aaron reached under the table and gave her knee a gentle squeeze. He glanced pointedly at the menu, then mouthed, Don’t worry about it.

  Yeah, like she wasn’t going to worry. She couldn’t afford anything on this menu, and she doubted Aaron could either.

  “Liv tells me you’ll be applying to Juilliard soon,” Eldon said.

  “She’s an amazing pianist,” Liv broke in. “She’s going to own a music studio someday and be the most sought-after teacher in the country.”

  “You’re exaggerating,” Sienna said, trying not to blush.

  “Not at all.”

  “Do you have aspirations for performing?” Eldon asked.

  “For a few years, maybe,” Sienna said. “But not long-term. I’d rather help others become performers and compose my own pieces on the side.”

  Eldon nodded, taking a sip of his wine. “And what about you, Aaron?”

  “I’m majoring in graphic design. I’m hoping to start my own freelance company after graduation.”

  “I didn’t know that,” Sienna broke in.

  Aaron gave her a wry grin. “There’s a lot we still don’t know about each other, I’m sure.”

  Eldon sniffed. “I don’t approve of entrepreneurial pursuits. Too much work for not enough pay. That’s why I’m with a large law firm—I get the big bucks while letting the partners take on most of the risk.”

  The night went downhill from there. Eldon was uncomfortably direct in his line of questioning, asking specific questions about Aaron and Sienna’s career plans and relationship goals. Liv mouthed sorry to Sienna more than once, but then kept breaking out in giggles at random points in the conversation. Sienna didn’t know what Eldon’s hands were doing under the table, and she had no desire to find out.

  Sienna ordered no appetizer, no drink, and the cheapest entrée on the menu, and noticed Aaron did the same.

  When the waitress brought the check, there was only one billfold. She sat it on the table and waited. Eldon and Aaron reached for it at the same time.

  “I’ve got it,” Eldon said.

  “I can take care of my own date,” Aaron said, his voice tight.

  “Please, I insist.” Eldon plucked the billfold from under Aaron’s hands and set a card inside, then handed it back to the waitress.

  “Thanks,” Aaron said. He was smiling, but Sienna could tell he was annoyed. “We really appreciate it.”

  “Yes, thank you,” Sienna said. “It was so nice to get together. Aaron and I better get going now. Early class.”

  Liv rose and gave Sienna a tight hug, air-kissing her cheek. “Sorry,” she whispered. “I guess Eldon had a little too much to drink. He’s usually not so forward.”

  “It’s okay,” Sienna said. Eldon was just one guy in a long string of men undeserving of Liv’s attention. “See you at home.”

  As soon as the restaurant doors closed, Aaron let out a huge sigh. Sienna laughed, wrapping her arm around his.

  “Was it that bad?” she asked.

  “I can’t believe he paid for dinner. I felt like I was back in high school, asking my parents for money.”

  “I’m just relieved neither of us will have to take out another student loan to cover the check.” She giggled. “We should’ve ordered drinks and dessert.”

  “Are all the guys Liv dates like that?”

  “Liv dates anyone and everyone. Her last boyfriend was a beach bum without an ocean. But yeah—she tends to pick losers. I still haven’t figured out why.”

  “She deserves better,” Aaron said. And those three words somehow made Sienna fall for him even more.

  In the car, Sienna said, “Sorry—this is not how I envisioned our first date as boyfriend and girlfriend going. But now we can probably avoid a second double date, at least for a while.”

  “How did you envision our first date as boyfriend and girlfriend?” Aaron asked.

  “I don’t know. More romantic.”

  Aaron snapped his fingers, then flipped on his blinker to turn a corner. “I have an idea.”

  After a few minutes, Sienna said, “We’re going home?”

  “Just so I can pick up a few things. Wait here. I’ll be right back.” He ran up to his apartment and returned a few minutes later with a large thermos and a blanket.

  “Are you going to tell me what we’re doing now?” Sienna asked.

  Aaron just laughed and started driving, heading out of the city.

  “Someone emailed me today,” Aaron said. “They saw my photo and said they had a little brother born on my birthday that their mom gave away. He wasn’t sure of the hospital, but it was the same city where I was born.”

  Sienna straight
ened. “Are you serious?”

  “It might turn out to be nothing.”

  “Or you might find your birth mom.”

  “Maybe.”

  Sienna settled back into her seat, watching the city lights fade away as they crossed the Delaware River into New Jersey. “If you find her, what are you going to ask?”

  Aaron kept his gaze steadfastly focused on the road, but even in the dim light she could see his jaw muscles working. “I’m not sure. I just want closure. I want to somehow come to peace with that part of my life.”

  Sienna rested a hand on his leg, and he smiled. She wanted that for him, too. More than anything.

  Aaron pulled off the freeway and drove into a high school parking lot. He got out of the car and held out a hand.

  “Come on” he said.

  Sienna looked around. The large brick building was a dark outline against the night sky. Skeletal bleachers rose into the sky, framing a football field. “Is this high school supposed to mean something to me?”

  “No. When I moved to Philadelphia, I missed the quiet country nights. I found this high school one night when I was aimlessly driving. It’s perfect for star gazing.” He tossed the blanket over one arm and grabbed the thermos.

  “That better be coffee and not apple cider or something gross like that.”

  Aaron laughed. “Not a cider fan. Got it. Good thing I only had coffee on hand.”

  Their breath made tiny puffs in the cool night air. Aaron took her hand and guided her to the football field. They spread out a blanket, then sat beside each other. Aaron wrapped his arms around her as she leaned into him.

  “I think I’m falling in love with you,” he whispered in her ear.

  Sienna turned in his arms, her heart racing.

  “The feeling is mutual,” she whispered, and she kissed him.

  The evening was storybook perfect. They lay on the blanket, and Aaron pointed out made-up constellations while she laughed.

  “Is this how you imagined our first date as a couple?” Aaron asked.

  “It’s even better than I imagined,” Sienna said. And she wasn’t going to ruin it by bringing up Hunter. This weekend would come soon enough. “I want to take you on a date.”

 

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