by Arianna Hart
“Did you bring the video?”
“I brought a recording of the original. When everything is…over, I’ll delete it and destroy Matthew’s phone. I’ll even send you the pieces if you want proof.”
“That won’t be necessary.” She held out her hand in a silent demand for the phone.
Faith handed it over and watched Lydia’s face in sick fascination as the lawyer watched the recording with an almost fond smile. The woman must have ice water in her veins to watch an X-rated recording of herself screwing the husband of the woman sitting across from her without an ounce of remorse.
“Matthew died before he had a chance to send that to me. Too bad, it was one of my more satisfying encounters.”
Faith was speechless.
“Don’t look so shocked. In my circles, this is almost vanilla.”
“I really don’t want to know. That’s not why we’re here.”
“Oh yes, please tell me what John and Cynthia are up to these days. You said they are taking you to court for custody of your child? Why now? She must be almost six years old, if she is indeed Matthew’s.”
“She’s five, and, yes, she’s Matthew’s. I have the DNA report to confirm it. As to why the Prentices suddenly want contact with Piper, I have no idea. When she was first born, I sent pictures to them, but they returned them unopened. After a while, I stopped bothering.”
“Did you save the letters? We can use them to show the judge you tried to contact them and they refused.”
“Y-yes. I have them, somewhere. I tend to hold on to things.”
“Obviously. Where are you in the proceedings so far?”
“My lawyer just got the papers saying they wanted partial custody on the grounds they could provide her with a better education and quality of life. That’s when Nadya, my lawyer, suggested I find someone better versed in family law.”
“Who is she?”
“Nadya McBride. She has an office here in Canton. She does mostly contract law, house closings, and wills and things.”
“I know what a contract lawyer is. I’ve never heard of her, so she gave you good advice. I’m familiar with the law firm the Prentices use. They’re old and conservative, but they’d have chewed up your little contract lawyer and spit her out.”
Faith felt insulted on Nadya’s behalf, but she bit her tongue. All she wanted was to get this meeting over with and get back home.
“Does that mean you can go toe-to-toe with them?”
Lydia scoffed. “I’ve tangled with them before. I have no worries. Have your lawyer send me the briefs. I need a little time to do some research, but I have no doubt that this can all be worked out to your satisfaction without having to go in front of a judge. Unless you have a secret drug habit or gambling addiction or some other unsavory behavior, no judge in the world will take away your child. Especially after you show proof that you made an effort to include them in your child’s life and they chose to reject her. Find those letters.”
“I will.” Ironically, she thought they were in the same fire box where she kept Matthew’s phone.
“Good, then we’re done here. I’ll be in touch when I have more information.” She gathered her purse and made to leave.
“Wait. Just one more thing,” Faith stopped her.
“Yes?” She raised one perfectly groomed eyebrow.
“Can you tell me why?” She wanted to bite back the words but couldn’t seem to stop herself. “Why did you do what you did with my husband?”
God, she sounded like an idiot, but something inside her, some demon of insecurity, demanded an answer.
“It was just sex, you make it sound like we sacrificed a chicken and bathed in its blood.”
“It was sex with my husband. You’re a beautiful woman. You could have any man. Why mine?”
“Because that’s the kink. God, look at your face, you little innocent. Did you think Matthew was the first ambitious lawyerling I seduced? The fact that he was married to his precious high school sweetheart and so very much in love with her was all part of the game.”
“I don’t understand.”
“What’s confusing you? He wanted to make partner, I let it be known that I would back his promotion for certain favors. I also made it clear that I would block him if he didn’t perform satisfactorily.”
“But why?”
“Because that’s what turns me on. You look at that recording and see a woman tied up and humiliated. I look at that and remember how much he didn’t want to do it. Who really had the power? Did you see his face? He’s not turned on, he’s furious, but he’s doing it anyway, because when push came to shove, he wanted to be a partner, and that was the way to get there quickly.”
“That’s sick.”
“He could have quit, gone to a different firm, or just waited longer. He would’ve made partner eventually, but he wanted the shortcut. In the end, that proved more important than his marriage. That’s not my fault. Now, if that’s everything, I really do need to go. I’ll be in touch.”
Faith didn’t know what to say. She wanted to slap Lydia in her smug, perfect face. Wanted to storm out of the restaurant and vow never to see the woman again. But she didn’t. She sat right there and watched her go, because she needed Lydia to get what she wanted, too.
She was no better than Matthew.
In a fog, she left some cash to cover the two iced teas plus a generous tip and shuffled out of the restaurant. The drive home was too long and quiet and gave her too much time to think.
It was humbling to realize when faced with the same choice, she’d caved in just as Matthew had. No, she wasn’t breaking her marriage vows. She was breaking the law. Technically, she was extorting Lydia, even if the woman didn’t seem to realize it.
Actually, she seemed rather smug about the whole thing. Faith pulled the truck over to the side of the road, feeling nauseous as something occurred to her. Not once during their meeting, had Faith had to threaten Lydia into helping her. All she had wanted was to see the video. No, to make Faith show her the video. As if seeing it wasn’t enough of a blow, she had to rub salt in the wound by making Faith watch her watch the video.
The woman was diabolical. It was like she got off by making people do things that went completely against their nature.
Faith burst into tears, great wrenching sobs of self-disgust. What was she thinking? This wasn’t how she’d been raised, how she wanted to raise Piper. How could she bankrupt her morality and then tell Piper to do the right thing?
God, what a hypocrite.
After what felt like forever, the storm abated and she mopped herself up with a napkin from the glove box. She felt hollow and somehow lighter. The anger she’d harbored was gone. All that was left was pity. Pity for Matthew and the choices he’d made, pity for herself and the time she’d wasted in anger. And, yes, pity for Lydia, too. If manipulating people was the only way she could feel pleasure, then God help her.
For the first time since she’d climbed in the truck to head to the meeting, she felt calm. She knew what she had to do. Sure, she could justify blackmailing Lydia into helping her. Or she could put on her big girl panties and do what she knew was right.
It was a risk. A big frigging risk. Her heart skipped a beat as she thought about losing Piper. But if she kept her by doing something she knew was wrong, would she ever be able to look her daughter in the eye?
No. She had to make this right, and she had to do it now before she talked herself out of it. Digging her phone out of her purse, she called Lydia before she chickened out.
“Did you forget something?” Lydia answered.
“Only my morals.”
“How droll.”
“I’ve changed my mind. I don’t want you to take this case because of the video. I’m going to delete it as soon as I get home and destroy the original.”
“I knew you didn’t have the balls to go through with it. You realize you could lose your daughter without me representing you?”
“It
’s a risk I’ll have to take. I know this is all a game to you, but I have to look at myself in the mirror every morning, and I won’t be able to do that if I blackmail you. I’m sorry I wasted your time today. Good-bye.”
Faith ended the call and put her phone back in her purse. She’d go over the list of lawyers Nadya had sent her when she got home. The HVAC system could wait another year, and if she really had to, she could swallow her pride and ask Sam for a loan.
It wouldn’t be easy, but doing the right thing rarely was.
The rest of the drive passed in a blur. All she wanted to do was get home and curl up in the fetal position.
When she finally got home and dragged herself into the house, she could hear music drifting down from the bedrooms. Was Sam still here? He usually retreated to the cottage to work on his music. Maybe he got hungry? But then why did she hear him singing along with the radio upstairs?
Sadie gave a woof of welcome as she clambered into the kitchen. “Hey, girl. What have you been up to? Where’s Sam?” Faith put her pocketbook on the counter and headed upstairs. Sam’s voice singing along with Van Morrison rolled over her like melted chocolate, filling some of the empty spaces the crying jag had left raw.
Her eyes filled with tears again as she found him in Piper’s room standing on a ladder painting branches of an elaborate tree on the wall. He must have begun working as soon as she left this afternoon, because he had the entire trunk painted and had started on the upper branches. She could see the penciled outline of the rest of the branches and leaves. The drawing took up most of the wall in the reading nook.
“Hey, you’re home earlier than I expected. I was hoping to have this finished before you got back,” he said when he spotted her standing in the doorway. “What’s wrong? Why are you crying? If you don’t like it, I can paint over it.”
“I love it. It’s perfect. These are happy tears. You must have spent all day working on this instead of your music. I don’t know what to say.” Damn, the tears wouldn’t stop coming. How the heck did she have any left after all the bawling she’d done today?
“It wasn’t that hard. I looked online and saw some of the pictures I remember you showing me on Pinterest. I ordered some fairy cut-outs, too. I can handle a tree, but I didn’t want to tackle fairies.” He took a rag from his back pocket and wiped his hands off. “How’d the meeting with the lawyer go? You don’t look like it was a success.”
“I guess that depends on what you deem successful.”
“What does that mean?”
Faith had no idea what had gotten ahold of her, but she found herself blurting out the whole sordid tale, complete with a play-by-play of the meeting and her realization that she was no better than Matthew. The story didn’t sound any better with the retelling, but she felt better with her decision to cut Lydia loose.
“Holy shit, you faced the demons of your past, had an epiphany, and forgave your husband all in one afternoon. All I did was draw a tree.”
Faith laughed out loud and wrapped her arms around Sam. He pulled her close and tucked her head under his chin. For one golden moment, she felt at peace with the world.
“Thanks, I needed that. It’s been one heck of a day. It was really great to come home and hear you singing. I’m going to miss you when you leave.”
Darn it. She hadn’t meant to say that last part. What the heck happened to her filter? It was like she had no control over her mouth at all today.
“Speaking of that. I want to talk to you about something.”
“Yes?” Her stomach bottomed out, was he going to say he had to leave early?
“Do you think I could stay on for a few more weeks? I know I could finish the entire album if I have a little more time. This place has been great for my creativity.”
Was that the only reason he wanted to stay? Did she even care if it was if it meant she got more time with him?
“Absolutely. I don’t have any guests coming until after Piper starts school. I purposely blocked out the week before school so I could spend it with her.”
“You realize she’s only going to kindergarten, right? You aren’t sending her to boarding school.”
“I know, but it’s been only Piper and I for so long, the change is going to take a little while to settle in. I guess I’ll be lonely.” She laughed ruefully. “Isn’t that ridiculous? I usually have a house full of people, but I’m going to be lonely because Piper is at school for six hours.”
“Sometimes being surrounded by people is when I feel the loneliest.”
“What do you mean?” Faith took his hand and led him into the living room so she could snuggle with him on the couch. She’d had a monster of a day, but right now, he was the one who looked like he needed comfort.
“All I’ve ever wanted to do was make music and share it. It was never enough just to write the songs, I needed others to hear them. I wanted what I felt to touch someone, hit them right in the gut, ya know?”
“You wanted your music to form a connection.”
“Exactly.” It was his turn to laugh at himself. “A shrink would have a field day with that statement. Because I couldn’t talk to my father about my feelings, I had to write songs and play them for thousands to shove those feelings down his throat.”
“I always thought the best songs were the ones I could relate to. You aren’t alone in how you feel, and by putting your emotions on display like that with your music, others out there going through the same thing don’t feel so alone. That’s an amazing gift.”
“And I get all the chicks. Don’t forget that,” he scoffed.
“There is that.”
“Hot chicks aside, the reason I work so hard is so more people could hear my music.”
“So you could connect with more people.”
“Yes, except it isn’t working out that way.”
“How so?” Faith asked.
“The bigger the venue, the less connected I feel.”
“Performing in football stadiums isn’t exactly intimate.”
“It’s more like, I don’t know, watching porn or jerking off instead of having sex. You’re going through the same motions, but there’s no connection anymore. Shit, that pretty much describes most of my relationships over the last five years.”
“You lost the emotional connection you were searching for in the first place.”
“Exactly. But hey, I made a shit load of money and got a Grammy nomination. Too bad until I came here, I had nothing to say.”
“You know, when you first arrived I thought you looked lost. You reminded me how I felt after Matthew died. You looked like you’d lost your best friend and didn’t know how to go on. Like you were in this isolated bubble of solitude.”
“That’s a great line. You should write music.”
“Feel free to use it, gratis. Anyway, I think there are a lot of people in the world who can relate to that feeling of being alone. Sharing that emotion in your music, even if it’s in a football stadium, could help other people.”
“Even if I don’t feel the connection, they still might. I see what you’re saying. Thank you. You know, being here, being around you, has brought back some of the joy I’d thought I’d lost. This place is magical. Just because you won’t have Piper with you doesn’t mean you’re alone.”
“You say the sweetest things,” she whispered.
“Keep that to yourself, you’ll destroy my reputation.”
“Your secret is safe with me.” She got up from the couch and held out her hand to him. “Come on, let’s go to bed. You can prove what a bad boy you really are.”
Chapter Fourteen
There was nothing like good sex to make a body feel rejuvenated and ready to go. Last night had been amazing and…different. Not that she had a large sample to pull from, but most of her encounters with Sam had been hot and urgent.
Last night, they’d taken things slower, lingering over every touch, every kiss. Instead of racing to the finish line, they meandered their way along.
It hadn’t been a fiery explosion, more of a slow burn that had grown in intensity and gone on and on.
A quiver of arousal teased her, and she thought about heading to the cottage and seeing if they could repeat the experience.
Good heavens, she was turning into a sex addict.
“Focus, Faith. Get the brownies done for Mary Ellen and get your head out of your pants.”
She set the timer for another five minutes and opened her email on her laptop. It was time she found a lawyer. Nadya had given her five names to choose from and insisted she couldn’t go wrong with any of them. She should probably go online and research them, see what cases they’d won and stuff like that, but she didn’t have it in her. If Nadya said they were good, Faith would take her word for it.
She called the first name on the list. Andrew Blackman was busy with a client, but Faith left her name and number with the receptionist who said he would return her call. She contemplated calling the next name on the list but decided to wait until she spoke to Mr. Blackman.
While she had her computer out, she checked her budget spreadsheet. She was going to have to move some things around to make sure she had enough money for the retainer. Thank God, she hadn’t blown the extra money she’d gotten from Sam on a fancy refrigerator. Depending on how long this took, she might have to see about getting a home equity loan. She didn’t want to have to make mortgage payments, but she’d do what she had to do to keep Piper.
“Don’t borrow trouble. Let’s see what Mr. Blackman has to say before you go calling any banks.”
The timer dinged at the same time her phone rang. Seeing her mom’s cell number on the display, she hit the speaker button even as she reached for the oven door.
“Hey, Momma, what’s going on?” she asked as she pulled the brownies out and set them on a rack to cool. “Piper behaving herself?”
“Now don’t panic, but there’s been a little accident.”
Fear sapped the strength from her limbs, and she sat heavily on the nearest chair. “What sort of accident? Is everything okay?” She clutched the phone in a death grip.