“Better.” He leaned toward her and lightly brushed his lips against hers.
She got the better of herself and pressed her hands against his chest, pushing him away.
“I’m not done with you yet.”
Cain did his best to pout and then just watched her as she pulled out a fresh bandage. His eyes followed her fingers as she gently wrapped the cream gauze around his ribs.
“Tighter,” he said quietly and she looked up into his eyes, her fingers paused against his skin. “It’s better if it’s tighter.”
Lily just nodded and pulled the bandage tighter, ignoring the way Cain winced as she did so. He’d said he wanted it tight so he’d get it tight. She didn’t know what she was doing, but something told her that he did, that this wasn’t new to him. It was the scars that told her. She’d seen them when she was looking at his chest, little intricate scars or gashes that traversed a stretch of his body.
When she tied off the bandage, she smiled at him and ran her fingers over it. “There... all better.”
He smiled back at her and she held his gaze, letting him see all her concern for him.
Running her fingers up his body, she traced them over a deep scar that was just above his left collarbone. She frowned as she looked at it. It was only an inch wide but it looked as though it had been a bad wound.
He looked down at her fingers.
“How?” she asked as she removed her hand and let it rest in her lap with her other one.
Cain considered what to say for a moment and then decided to go with the truth. After all, he knew that she’d figured out he wasn’t as saintly as he had first seemed.
“Knife.” He shrugged as he looked at it, remembering the fight that had resulted in the stab wound. He’d only been in New York three months. It was the first time someone had got the better of him, and it was the night he’d decided that he would train hard so it never happened again. “I was working on my first job, was barely older than you. I was employed by Mort, your old boss’s competition, to be a negotiator.”
“Negotiator?” Lily frowned.
“Fancy way of saying that I threatened people into paying up what they owed.”
“And if they didn’t?” Lily gave him a curious look, already aware of what the answer would be.
“Things got physical.” He shrugged.
Lily felt strange that the knowledge that he’d been someone’s heavy hand didn’t bother her. She felt bad for still wanting to be with him, as though it was deeply wrong of her to care about someone like him.
“Like they did the night this happened?” She ran her fingers gently over the scar again and bit her lip slightly as her skin buzzed with delight over touching him.
“Yeah. Guy didn’t want to pay up, the two men with me weren’t up to much fighting, so I did it... they didn’t like the odds. I was too young and stupid.” Cain caught the look in her eyes that said she knew what he meant by that—that he was better now, wiser and more dangerous than he’d been back then. “He had a knife, I got a few scars. Got one on my wrist and this one on my shoulder. He caught me off balance, drove the knife in as deep as he could and left it there.”
“What happened?” Lily tried to ignore the way her heart had accelerated when he’d been telling the story, the way imagining the fight in her head thrilled her a little.
“I passed out... when I woke up I was in some dark little room with some two-bit doc looking down at me. It wasn’t pleasant, and nowhere near sanitary, but I couldn’t go into hospital... too many questions. I was lucky, have always been lucky, it missed everything major. Doc said that if it had gone a few millimeters either left or right, I would have been done for.” He just shrugged and tried not to remember just how frightened he’d been after that. He’d been off work for two months, petrified of getting into any scrapes for fear of ending up dead.
He’d trained like crazy to make sure it never happened.
Not that he’d needed to. When he’d been growing up back in England, his archery and shooting instructors had told him that he was a natural. His parents had been so very proud of their son—the model child for such a rich and pretentious family.
Turns out his instructors had been right. He was born to kill. Christ, they’d die if they knew what he did for a living now.
He tried not to laugh aloud at that thought—die.
Lily stood slowly, bringing him out of his thoughts. She packed the medical kit away, placing it beside her bed when she was done and then walked over to the wardrobe. He watched her grab something and then walk out of the room.
He frowned, trying to decipher just what was happening.
When she walked back into the room, he almost choked. She had changed into a little black satin nightdress and was brushing her hair as she smiled at him.
“Got any other stories about your scars?” Lily asked as she moved across the room to him and took hold of his hand, making him stand. Her stomach swirled with nerves as she tried to act calm and confident.
“Plenty,” he said as he looked her over approvingly.
“Care to share?” Lily tried to stop her hands from shaking and swallowed down the nerves that had formed a lump in her throat.
Cain’s heart beat painfully hard against his chest as he watched her little hands undoing his belt. He couldn’t move, couldn’t speak as she began to unbutton his jeans.
Clearing his throat, he smiled shakily. “You’ll be up all night... I have a lot of scars.”
Lily giggled.
“Who wants to sleep? I certainly don’t. I want to stay up all night and talk... all day even... whatever it is outside... I want to talk.” She finished undoing his jeans and pushed them down around his ankles, trying not to blush as she did so.
All she was going to do was sleep next to him, nothing dirty, nothing to be embarrassed about.
Cain smiled at how nervous she was and removed his jeans for her, taking the hint that she was trying to slap him across the face with.
She crawled across the bed and under the covers, waiting for him to join her.
He gave himself a moment to come to terms with what was happening and then slipped under the covers, telling himself repeatedly that this wasn’t going to get out of control.
They’d talk. They’d sleep. That’s all. Together.
He smiled as Lily looked over at him, her eyes wide and expectant as he propped himself up on some pillows and tried to remember which stories went with which scars.
She raised her hand and ran her fingertips lightly over the scar that cut across his eyebrow.
“Let’s start with this one.”
* * *
Chapter 16
Something was ringing.
Cain groaned as he rolled onto his side, his ribs aching under the pressure of his weight and his hand reaching out sleepily as it attempted to locate his mobile phone in the unfamiliar layout of the room. Fumbling about, he finally got hold of his phone and flipped it open as he brought it to his ear.
“Mmm’ hello?” he said sleepily into it as he rubbed his hand over his face to try and wake himself up.
“Cain, where the hell have you been? I’ve been trying to get hold of you for hours.” Russ’ panicked voice greeted him.
Cain just frowned and blinked his eyes open slowly as he imagined wringing the little git’s neck. He’d better have a good reason for waking him.
“Around. Protecting my interests,” he replied and looked over at Lily where she was sound asleep next to him.
Looking down at his watch, he was surprised to see it was only nearing two in the afternoon. He felt as though he’d been talking with Lily for longer than that. He felt as though he’d talked an entire day away.
“What’s up?” he finally asked and waited to hear what had Russ so panicked.
“Sources indicate that the mark is moving.”
A chill washed over him and he immediately sat up, wincing and holding his ribs as he did so. He left the bed and the comfort
of Lily as he stepped into his old life, leaving the one he so badly wanted lying under the sheets alone.
“Moving?” he hissed into the phone as he glanced over his shoulder at her, checking that she was still asleep. He walked out of the bedroom and into the living room, putting some distance between himself and anyone that could overhear him.
“There’s indication he’s leaving tomorrow to go back to Los Angeles on personal business. The contract needs to be fulfilled tonight.”
“Tonight? It’s too soon. I won’t have time to prepare and there’s a certain interfering redhead that will be all over me wherever I go in this city.” He almost growled the words into the phone as he thought about having to go from spending the perfect night with his girl, to killing someone, someone she’d loved.
“Preparations are already made. He’ll be visiting Eden before he leaves. One final farewell to all the lovely ladies and his friends. That’s when the contract is to be fulfilled. As for the redhead, she’s been taken care of... so to speak.”
Cain was astounded by how calm Russ sounded. He’d suddenly lost the panic in his voice and his tone had been confident when he informed him that Sherry had been taken out.
He closed his eyes.
Russ had done the hit—his first loner job.
The thought of Russ finally being out on his own made Cain smile. He’d no longer have him hanging off his coat tails and he could get on with his work alone. He frowned at how part of him still wanted to do this, still wanted to go out there and fulfill contracts and do recon work. It was the only thing he was good at. He looked back at the open bedroom door and shuddered as a cold chill swept up his spine.
It was so easy to forget her sometimes, especially when he was speaking to another person in his line of work. It was so easy to get lost in it.
So scarily easy.
He could detach himself from reality in the blink of an eye, could see his target as a dead man already so he didn’t have to deal with the guilt of murder, could shut off his emotions and do his job.
Killing was frighteningly easy when you could do all that.
He turned away from the door and sighed into the phone.
“Time?” His voice was all business.
“Eight, before opening, he’s due to go down and set up... he’s hired the place out for his big farewell,” came the reply from Russ.
“Location?”
“Rooftop, above the entrance. Alley job. You know the drill. Hell, you wrote the drill.”
“Anything I should know?” Cain queried, knowing there wouldn’t be but asking all the same.
“None. Just be as good as you always are.” Russ paused for a second. “Oh, and Cain... nice work on Mr. Valentino. Mort says thanks for the impromptu hit.”
Cain tensed his jaw and closed his eyes, burying his frustration over hearing someone congratulating him for cold-blooded murder. “It wasn’t for him, but I’m flattered he thinks it was.”
“I know... he knows... everyone knows about you and the girl. Just don’t let your feelings get in the way of your job or it will be you that winds up dead. Happy hitting!”
Cain arched a brow at the phone as Russ ended the call. He couldn’t quite bring himself to believe what he’d said.
Happy hitting?
Christ, this guy needed therapy for some misdeed in his life because he was clearly screwed up in the brain department. Either that or this was all a game to him. Cain mused that it used to be a game to him, too, once, and then it became a profession, and now he wished he could just get out. He wondered if all professional killers went through this, their conscience eventually catching up with them and making them want to leave, hopefully to find a good life.
“You okay?” Lily rubbed her hair sleepily as she leaned in the bedroom doorway and watched Cain staring at his phone.
He just looked up at her, his expression remaining pensive. “I’ve got to go... I’m sorry.”
“Go? What about that girl?” Lily suddenly felt a lot more awake as she thought about the weird redhead from last night.
“Taken care of. I’ll be away a few days, duty calls.” He walked toward her and sighed as she looked up at him. “I wish I didn’t have to.”
“Same here.” Lily wrapped her arms around him gently and held him as tightly as she could without hurting him. “Be careful.”
Cain pressed a kiss to her forehead, not missing what she’d said and knowing she had a suspicion that he was going away to do something dangerous. Last night, he’d told her the stories behind his scars, all of them, stories from his childhood through to killing Mr. Valentino. She knew what he was capable of, and it made him feel a little easier that she still wanted to be with him—as though there was still hope for them if he came clean and told her what he did for a living.
And he was going to.
As soon as this contract was paid, he was leaving the profession, no matter what the consequences were. If Lily would have him, they could run together and keep running, if that’s what it took. He was clever. They’d never find him, and if they did, he’d kill them.
He’d kill anyone in order to protect his girl.
Lily watched him as he walked past her into the bedroom and got dressed. She could sense a change in him, could see in his eyes and his expression that whatever the phone call had been about, he hadn’t liked it one little bit. Her eyes followed him around the room as he gathered his things and it hit her that he seemed edgy, almost nervous. She’d never seen him like this, never thought she would see him like this. He’d always seemed so confident, now he seemed so unsure.
It scared her.
She didn’t know why, but it did, and she suddenly didn’t want him to leave. If he left, he might not come back. Her heart clenched as she thought about that. There was something in the air, in the atmosphere between them that was making it feel so final, and she couldn’t bring herself to say the words that would make him stay.
He’d told her things last night that she knew should’ve shocked her, but there was something beautiful about how honest he’d been with her and it had left her feeling close to him. She had the feeling that he didn’t talk to many people, and definitely didn’t talk to anyone like he’d talked to her last night. He’d been so open, and in return, she’d been open with him.
It felt freeing, finally letting someone in.
Lily smiled as he slipped his jacket on and gave her a look that said he wasn’t happy about having to leave her. She walked over to him and intertwined her fingers with his as she led him toward the front door.
As they reached it, she stopped him and smoothed down the lapels of his long leather coat, keeping her eyes away from his and buying herself some time to get a grip on her feelings. She didn’t want to make this any harder on him, so she pushed down her emotions and kept a tight rein on the tears that were trying to well up.
When he was out the door, she could cry her heart out and hopefully this feeling of doom along with it, but for now she had to be strong.
Cain raised his hand and gently cupped her cheek. He smiled when Lily looked up at him—a smile to hide the pain. Looking into her green eyes, he wanted to confess all his sins, wanted to tell her that he was sorry for what he was about to do, wanted to let her know just what kind of man he was.
Instead, he pressed a brief kiss to her lips and tried to ignore the way hers trembled slightly, belying the turbulent emotions she was hiding just below the surface of her smile. He knew that she could feel this finality as much as he could. The only difference was that he was used to this feeling whereas it was all new to her.
Every contract he went to fulfill, every hit in every city across the world, had started with this feeling of doom.
You made your bed, and one day you had to lay in it. You couldn’t win every time. One day someone would get the better of you. You just had to hope each time you woke up that today wasn’t that day.
Today hope didn’t get a look in. Today he was praying to a
nyone listening to bring him back to her.
Lily silently opened the door, keeping her eyes downcast as he stepped out into the hall. When she felt his fingers brush against her cheek, she leaned into his touch and sighed.
“Come back to me,” she whispered quietly, part of her hoping he’d hear it and part of her hoping he wouldn’t.
“I promise, baby, I’ll come back.” He dipped his head and kissed her gently. “I promise.”
Lily just nodded and then watched him as he turned his back on her and started walking down the hall. She waited until he was out of sight and then shut the door, closing her eyes as she leaned her back against it.
“Please... come back to me,” she breathed as she looked up at the ceiling, silently praying that someone up there would look after him.
“Where’s Cain?” Sarah asked sleepily.
“He had to leave... on a job.” Lily wondered just what job he had to do and then decided that maybe she was better off not knowing, just like he’d once told her.
Some things were best left unsaid.
The implications of that were massive now, but when he’d said it, she’d just thought he didn’t have time to tell her there and then because he’d had to leave on business. But now, now she couldn’t stop wondering just why it was best left unsaid. Was he scared to tell her? Frightened of how she would react? She’d shown him last night as she’d listened to the tales behind his scars that she could deal with whatever he had done in the past, that she could deal with whatever he did.
She could forgive him.
Did he think that what he did was beyond her sphere of forgiveness?
Beyond anyone’s forgiveness?
“Lily?” Sarah said and then smiled when Lily looked at her. “Want to do something for the rest of the day?”
Lily nodded and threw herself wholeheartedly into entertaining Sarah. It would keep the thoughts of Cain’s job out of her head and she wouldn’t have to deal with trying to figure him out. It was beginning to give her a major headache and she was feeling more confused than ever.
Killing Game Page 16