“No.” He nearly choked on the word, but he got it out. For her.
“Is that why you’ve been so distant this past week?”
Not really. Worries about the ranch and his grandfather’s poor health crowded his mind, making it near impossible to think of anything else. All the late night talks with his brothers, pouring over the dwindling accounts, sorting through which bills to pay now and which to hold off, arguing about selling off a piece of land or trying to get a loan to tide them over, all of it one big headache after the next, leaving them with few options.
He didn’t answer her question, because if he told her about his grandfather, she’d stay to help the only father-figure she’d ever had in her life, but if things kept going the way they were, he’d lose the ranch and have nothing and no way to provide for her. The money he’d saved to go away with her, he had to put back into the ranch to keep it going. They’d have mounting hospital bills to overcome too. No matter how he worked it out in his head, it was all too clear that he had to stay here and fight for his family’s ranch and do whatever he had to do to make sure his grandfather got the care he needed.
Jamie stepped close and put her hand on his chest again. “I love you. I don’t want to go without you.”
His heart thrashed against his ribs. Sure she felt it, he didn’t let his roiling emotions show on his face. He had to do this clean, so she’d go with no regrets and move on with her life.
“Like you said, you’ll stay with your cousin. Find a job. Start a new life in a new place.”
“I thought that life included you, the home we dreamed about, the family we both want.”
I wish, but not anymore.
His chest went tight. He barely managed his next words. “You’ll be fine on your own. You’ll figure out what you really want once you’re away from here. I’m a rancher. This is where I belong.”
“You really don’t want to go with me.” The disbelief in her whispered statement tore another strip off his battered heart.
Ford didn’t move a muscle. He didn’t answer that statement by word or deed, because the honest to God truth was that he did want to go with her. Hell, he just wanted to be with her, here, there, anywhere.
“Did I do something? Say something? If I did, I’m sorry.” Tears glistened in her eyes as she struggled to come to some kind of understanding for why he’d do this to her.
Her mother always made her feel like everything was her fault. He hated to do this to her. Hated it. Hated himself for putting her through this.
He choked back his emotions. Had to. For her. “We were great together, but now you need to go. I get it. I’m sorry to see you leave, but I guess this was always the way it ended.”
Someone should shoot him. Put him out of his misery. Avenge her for his making this seem like it was her fault. He didn’t know if he had the resolve to keep this up much longer. She needed to go before he took her in his arms and begged her to forgive him for being an asshole. Before he begged her to stay with him even though she needed out.
He wouldn’t trap his firefly in a cage and watch her beautiful spirit and light dim and die.
He loved his family, the ranch his parents’ left to them, but sometimes it was a heavy burden, despite it being his heart and soul.
She opened her mouth to say something, but he cut her off. “Pack your bags. Leave today like you wanted. Get away from her, this place, all the bad memories, and start your life.”
Jamie shook her head, golden red hair swishing across her back and shoulders. Tears glistened in her eyes. “Why are you doing this?” Her voice cracked with the plea in that complicated question.
“You want to go. I need to stay.” That’s as close as he’d come to telling her the truth. “Go, Firefly. Fly away.”
About the Author
JENNIFER RYAN is the New York Times and USA Today bestselling author of The Hunted, The McBride, and the Montana Men series. She writes romantic suspense and contemporary small-town romances featuring strong men and equally resilient women. Her stories are filled with love, friendship, and the happily-ever-after we all hope to find. Jennifer lives in the San Francisco Bay Area with her husband and three children. When she isn’t writing a book, she’s reading one. Her obsession with both is often revealed in the state of her home and in how late dinner is to the table. When she finally leaves those fictional worlds, you’ll find her in the garden, playing in the dirt and daydreaming about people who live only in her head, until she puts them on paper.
www.jennifer-ryan.com
www.avonromance.com
www.facebook.com/avonromance
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By Jennifer Ryan
Montana Men Series
Her Renegade Rancher
Stone Cold Cowboy
Her Lucky Cowboy
When It’s Right
At Wolf Ranch
The McBride Series
Dylan’s Redemption
Falling for Owen
The Return of Brody McBride
The Hunted Series
Everything She Wanted
Chasing Morgan
The Right Bride
Lucky Like Us
Saved by the Rancher
Short Stories
Can’t Wait
(appears in All I Want for Christmas Is a Cowboy)
Waiting for You
(appears in Confessions of a Secret Admirer)
Copyright
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
Excerpt from His Cowboy Heart copyright © 2017 by Jennifer Ryan.
her renegade rancher. Copyright © 2016 by Jennifer Ryan. All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews. For information, address HarperCollins Publishers, 195 Broadway, New York, NY 10007.
EPub Edition OCTOBER 2016 ISBN: 9780062435378
Print Edition ISBN: 9780062435354
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Avon, Avon Books, and the Avon logo are trademarks of HarperCollins Publishers.
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