by Ann Mcintosh
“I heard the same thing.”
Kiah’s voice was unruffled, and unexpected, since she hadn’t heard him enter the room. When she glanced at him, his expression was neutral, but his gaze was watchful.
She felt put on the spot, especially when looking from one to the other she encountered equally questioning gazes.
“It’s true,” she said, trying not to sound defensive. Then she held up her hand. “But before you start cross-questioning me as to why I didn’t mention it, I wanted to think the offer through, before either giving him an answer or telling you both about it. And I also got an email, just yesterday, offering me a position at Toronto South. So I have to take that into consideration, too.”
There was a clatter, as Kiah dropped something and it fell to the floor. When Mina finally looked his way, it was no use, since he was bending down to pick the utensil up off the floor, and she couldn’t see his face.
“So have you made a decision?” That came from Miss Pearl, while Kiah went back to laying out the cutlery on the dining table.
Mina took a deep breath and kept her gaze fixed on the older woman. She didn’t know how Kiah would react to what she was going to say next, and wasn’t at all sure she wanted to see.
“I haven’t. I spoke to Dr. Hamilton today, asking for more time to decide.”
“Well, I hope you make the right choice,” the old lady said, more than a touch of asperity in her tone. “I’m not surprised at either of those offers, but I know which one I think is the best fit for you.”
“Well, they both came as a surprise to me,” Mina confessed. “I wasn’t sure I’d even be able to continue practicing medicine, despite all the encouragement I was given after the accident. And I have to say, it’s nice to have options again.”
Even if both those options left her in an untenable situation.
“We’ll have to prepare Charmaine, in any event,” Miss Pearl said. “If you decide to go back to Canada right away, she’ll be sorely disappointed.”
That caused a hard pang of guilt and pain, but Mina acknowledged the truth of the statement. Charm had stolen a big piece of her heart.
“But—”
“Leave it now, Granny.”
Kiah’s tone brooked no argument, and even though the older woman pressed her lips together, she didn’t say anything more. Mina turned in time to see his back disappearing down the corridor to the kitchen, and even just the way he was walking told her he was angry. Miss Pearl looked toward him, too, and then back at Mina.
“You better go talk to him, child. He’s upset.”
Mina had to squelch the urge to put her fingers in her ears like a child, and insist she didn’t want to, but, with a sigh, she stood.
“I guess I should,” she said.
Miss Pearl held out her hand for the remote and Mina handed it over, before heading for the kitchen, trying not to drag her feet as she went.
Kiah was at the stove, stirring a pot of what smelled like beef stew, the microwave humming in the corner. He didn’t look up when she came in, although she knew, without a doubt, he was aware of her entrance.
“Hey,” she said, pausing at the end of the counter, where she could see his profile. “Are you angry?”
His eyebrows raised fractionally, then fell back into place. “Why would I be angry?”
“Oh, I don’t know,” she said, unable to keep the sarcasm out of her voice. “Because I didn’t tell you about Dr. Hamilton’s offer, or the one from Toronto South? Something like that?”
He grunted but didn’t say anything, and Mina felt her annoyance level rising. This was Kiah at his uncommunicative best, and it never failed to rile her up. But this time she was determined not to get sucked in.
“I didn’t tell you when the offers came in, because I really needed to think it through. To my mind, it didn’t make sense getting everyone, especially Charm, wrought up over something I hadn’t figured out yet. I’ve been drifting along, letting things happen to me, rather than taking the initiative. That needs to stop.”
Kiah’s lips firmed, but he still didn’t reply, and Mina sighed.
“Okay, listen,” she said, letting some of her irritation bleed into her tone. “Whatever it is you’re thinking, let me know when you’re ready to share. Because I’m not standing here and letting you make me feel as though I’ve done something wrong, when I haven’t. I’m trying to do the best I can, and if you can’t figure that out, tough cookies.”
Then she turned and left, hugging her exasperation close, so as not to let any other emotion take over.
* * *
Damn Mina.
Kiah tossed the spoon into the pot and just barely missed getting splashed with hot stew.
Of course, he was angry.
Even more so now, after her pseudo explanation.
Was sleeping with him one of those things she’d drifted into? From Kiah’s perspective, it seemed as though that was something she’d wanted, nearly as much as he had.
And drifting into the job here had done her a world of good, helping to put to rest her worries regarding her abilities since losing her hand.
To make it sound as though all of that was just happenstance riled him up.
Yeah, he could admit the offers she’d received deserved the deepest thought before being accepted or rejected, but it didn’t mean she couldn’t talk to him about them, warn him. It had been bad enough hearing about Dr. Hamilton’s offer through the rumor mill at work, but to also find out she had another offer from Toronto had made his stomach roil.
He pulled out one of the kitchen chairs and lowered himself into it, scrubbing his hands over his face.
Neither her leaving nor staying permanently were things he wanted to contemplate. Both eventualities came with consequences he couldn’t even begin to calculate.
It would be better if she left. He’d gotten way too used to having her around as it was, and now that they’d slept together, being near her all the time was doing crazy things to his body.
And his head.
If she went back to Canada, things could go back to normal.
Right?
But he knew he was lying to himself, thinking that they would. She’d made an indelible mark on his entire family. Plus, back home, Mina would have the freedom to date, and sleep with, whomever she wanted, which could lead her to the life she dreamt of.
As her friend, he should be happy with that thought, but it just made him angrier.
Kiah would have probably marched back into the living room and caused a scene if it weren’t for the scent of scorching meat.
Jumping up with a curse, he moved the pot off the burner and turned off the fire. Grabbing the spoon made him swear again, and drop the red-hot implement.
He had to get a grip on his anger, if only for Charm’s sake. He couldn’t let his niece see how upset he was and start asking questions.
Sighing, he went to get a pot holder, and then used it to hold the spoon and gently stir the stew, being careful not to pull any of the burned stuff off the bottom.
The reality was that Mina had already become an integral part of their lives. The sense of rightness of having her here, the joy he got seeing her each morning, riding back home with her in the evening, just seeing her around the place, was unmistakable. Since they’d slept together, that sense of belonging had just grown.
It really was better that she go sooner rather than later.
But he didn’t want her to.
He wanted to keep her right where she was.
It was the most selfish impulse ever, and he knew it. Having no intention of initiating any further changes in their relationship and, in fact, being determined to back away from making love with her again, he had no right to make any demands.
If ever it was time to put his money where his mouth was, this was it, and he did his be
st to stuff all his anger and confusion down, as he dished out the food.
“Charm, come help me carry these in, please,” he called.
The youngster came into the kitchen, scuffing her feet, looking so dejected Kiah’s heart ached for her. Yet, he knew neither Miss Pearl nor Mina would have said anything to her about what was happening.
“Hey, what’s the matter?” he asked, knowing full well what the problem was.
“Nothing.”
It was barely more than a mumble, but her eyes glistened with tears.
Putting down the dish in his hand, Kiah pulled out a chair and pointed to it. “Sit.”
With obvious reluctance, his niece did as bid.
“Were you listening to the conversation between Granny, Auntie and me?”
“Yes, but it was an accident.”
He shook his head. “I don’t think it was, Charm. That’s a bad habit to have, and you need to stop eavesdropping. If you want to know something, ask, but don’t sneak around trying to hear things that don’t concern you.”
Her lower lip trembled. “I’m sorry. I won’t do it anymore, but is Auntie really going back to Canada soon?”
“She might be. But even if she goes back, I’m sure you can go visit her, if you wanted to.” Just the thought of Charm going to Canada made his stomach churn, and added another layer of pain to the whole situation.
“She always said I could, but suppose she changes her mind?”
Kiah chuckled, although the last thing he felt was amusement. “Listen, I’ve known Auntie Mina since I was the same age you are now, and she never, ever says anything she doesn’t mean, okay?” Tugging her out of the chair, he hugged her and gave her a kiss on the top of her damp head, adding, “Everything will work out, Charm. Just wait and see.”
“Okay,” she said.
But although Charm seemed to take heart, Kiah couldn’t help wondering if he believed his own optimistic words.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
DINNER WAS TENSE. Although the adults tried to keep up a facade of normalcy, Charm was unusually quiet and a little surly. So much so that, after she’d helped to clear the table, she declared she was going to go to bed, without anyone reminding her it was time.
Mina found it telling that she wasn’t asked to come and tuck Charm in, as she often had been in the past. Instead, it was Kiah who went to make sure she had turned out her light.
When he came back into the living room, he said to Miss Pearl, “Do you think you can manage by yourself for a little?”
“Of course.” She sniffed, as though annoyed. “I got back up the hill from the stream after I twisted my ankle, so I’m sure I’ll be able to get myself to bed without any problems.”
He turned to Mina. “Do you want to go get a drink somewhere?”
“Sure,” she said, not bothering to disguise the frost in her voice. “Just let me go change.”
She was spoiling for a fight, and she knew it. Whatever he had to say, she was ready to give it all right back to him.
Wasn’t he the one, back in Canada, who told her she needed to get on with her life? What right did he have to be upset because she was doing exactly that?
With that in mind, as they were driving toward the Sweet Spot, she said, “If you want to talk about what I told you earlier, I don’t think we should do it in public.”
He slanted her a glance and said, “Yes, I want to discuss it. So, if that’s how you feel, what do you suggest?”
“Let’s just go to the beach. We can walk and discuss.”
But if he thought he was going to berate her for keeping the news to herself, he’d better have a damn good argument, because she was loaded for bear.
The moon was waxing, almost full. The scene at Rickard’s Cove, with its backdrop of coconut trees, would have been romantic if Mina wasn’t simmering with annoyance.
Kiah waited while she took off her sandals, and then they walked silently together down toward the water. It occurred to her that, before they’d slept together, they’d probably have been holding hands, or Kiah would have put his arm around her shoulders, and the memory made her suddenly sad.
“You think I’m upset because you didn’t tell me what was going on, but that isn’t true.”
She’d been so lost in melancholy reminiscences his voice startled her, but it also brought her back to the moment, and her anger.
“Really?” Injecting skepticism into her tone wasn’t difficult at all. “So what is your problem then? Because it sure seems like you’re sulking for having been left out of the loop.”
“That’s not it, Mina.” There was a note of frustration in his voice. “Sure, I was annoyed that I had to hear about Hamilton’s offer at the hospital, instead of from you, but I have bigger concerns than that.”
“Like what?”
“Like Charm’s well-being. Yes, I want what’s best for you, and I know deciding what that is, is your job. It’s just not going to be easy, no matter what you choose. Especially for Charm. She heard us talking earlier, and is upset just at the idea of you leaving.”
Of course, he was thinking about the effect on Charm. What had happened between them didn’t come into the picture, at all.
Not for him, anyway.
“Kiah, no matter where I am, Charm is always welcome. In fact, I’d love to take her to Canada. I can’t think of anything more fun than the thought of showing her around Toronto, or taking her to Niagara Falls.”
“That’s another thought that fills me with dread,” he said, and she could actually hear it in his voice. “Charm in Canada.”
“Why? Don’t you trust me to take care of her?”
“Of course I do. I wouldn’t trust her with anyone else. It’s just...”
He stopped and stood facing the water, rubbing his hand across his cheek, the way he always did when upset.
“Just what?” She spoke gently, realizing they’d gotten far from the topic of her job prospects, but not minding. There was something deeper at play here, and she wanted to know what it was.
“I don’t want her seeing Mom, and don’t know that I can stop it happening, if either of them wants to see the other.”
His words rocked her back on her heels, and before she could formulate a reply, he went on.
“Mom’s toxic, Mina. You know that. She drove Roy to do what he did, and then had the gall to want to fight me for custody when it turned out Karlene and Roy had made me her guardian. You remember?”
“Of course I do,” she said gently, unable to stop herself putting her hand on his arm, out of sympathy, and a shared sense of remembered grief.
It had been one of the worst things she’d experienced. They’d all been shocked and horrified by the tragedy. All except Kiah’s mother, who’d told anyone who’d listen she’d known it was going to happen. That Roy was evil, and a wastrel who’d stolen her daughter from her.
Not trusting Warren, even then, to do it properly, Mina had found Kiah a lawyer who’d petitioned the court on his behalf. Somehow, he’d convinced Mrs. Langdon, or her attorney, not to pursue her own claim, and Kiah had gotten full custody.
Outside the courtroom door, Kiah’s mother had told him, flat out, she never wanted to have anything more to do with him, within earshot of Charm, Mina and everyone else.
It had been horrid and uncomfortable, and one more blow to him in an already tragic situation.
“I can’t let her poison Charm, Mina. Not when she’s just getting to the stage that she’s wanting to hear about Karlene and Roy. Mom won’t have anything good to say about either of them.”
He paused, his throat working.
“And she won’t have anything good to say about me, either. She never did.”
Now she was angry again, but not at him. At his mother, and the soul-sapping hold she’d always had on Kiah.
Mi
na tightened her fingers and shook his arm, hard.
“Hezekiah Langdon, you listen to me. You’re a wonderful man, an amazing doctor and a fantastic father to Charm. Nothing your mother can do, or say, can change any of that, you hear me?”
He chuckled, but it was edged in pain.
“You have to say that. You’re my best friend.”
“No,” she said honestly. “I don’t have to say that, and wouldn’t if it weren’t true. For instance, if you were a crappy doctor, I’d leave that bit out. Or if you were a mediocre father, I’d be nice enough not to mention it. But I don’t recall our friend contract stating anywhere that I had to lie to stroke your ego, so I’m not going to do it.”
His laughter was more natural by the time she was finished, just as she’d hoped, but she wasn’t prepared for him to turn to her, and say, “So you think I’m a wonderful man, eh?”
Caught in a trap of her own making, all she could do was shake her head and send him a scowl.
“Why’re you always fishing for compliments? It’s one of your least attractive traits.”
Which just made him laugh harder, and when he pulled her in for a hug, it felt so natural to go into his arms, the way she had so many times before.
However, this wasn’t old times, and in the new reality she was living, Kiah Langdon wasn’t just her friend, but had also been her lover. The man who’d shown her more pleasure than she’d ever dreamed possible.
So being hugged didn’t feel safe, or comfy-cozy the way it used to. Instead, her body reacted, heating and softening, her heart rate kicking into high gear, her nipples tightening until they ached.
She wanted him, so very badly, but couldn’t have him, and she searched for something to say to distract her from the need weakening her resolve.
“Do you remember the night by the lake, up at my parents’ cottage?”
There had been several, but he hummed assent, the sound rumbling into her cheek, as though the shared memory had drifted from her brain into his. “Just before we went off to residency. How could I forget? You asked me to run away with you.”