by Fanny Finch
She looked at herself in the mirror, loving what she saw. A lot has changed since she met Sebastian. She had grown happier.
Her life had become more eventful, more colorful, and now that she knew the dangerous scheme he had embarked upon, she found herself extremely pleased that the man she loved was brave, noble and kind.
The kind of man to avenge his brother’s death, no matter the cost. Yes, she worried for his safety, and she feared that if they were right, and Walsh or her father were connected to this in any way, this would not end entirely happily.
Nevertheless, it would end, and the only thing that would matter would be for justice to be served, and for Sebastian and herself, to still have each other.
There was a spring in her step these days, she was aware of it. She was almost always of lofty spirits these days. Despite Sebastian’s busy schedule, he always found the time to call upon her and take her on numerous outings.
Every minute spent with him was enlightening as it was enchanting. The man knew so much, thanks to traveling the world, for four summers. He told her of what laid outside of England, and she saw through his eyes and words, cherishing the stories for what they were- precious.
It was also fascinating that they shared the same taste in almost everything. Music, art, books, plays.
Today, he was going to take her to the gallery. They had been to two galleries until now, and this would be the third. The only one left in London that they were yet to visit.
She was certain that the time together would be as lovely as all the moments they have shared, thus far.
She giggled as she thought of the way he always stared at her suddenly, as though she was all he could see in the entire universe.
Oh, what was a girl to do with such a man? He was the thing of dreams! If she hadn’t met her father, she would have very well believed that men like Sebastian only existed in the pages of all those books, she loved to read so much.
He was gentle, thorough and true. Noble, just. It was just as well that stepfather approved and Nora seemed to fancy him. She knew he was going to ask for her hand in marriage, it was only a matter of time.
She was more than content to wait.
Looking at her reflection once more, she decided that she was just perfect and nothing more needed to be done. She spied at the huge clock that hung on the wall and saw that it was a quarter-hour, left until when Sebastian had promised to come for her.
She would find a way to pass time until then, but it would not be standing in front of her vanity, less she became any vainer than she already was. Who knew she had it in her to worry about looks and all of those nuances?
Oh well, loving a man who seemingly loved you in return, could do that to a woman, she guessed.
Seemingly, because both of them were yet to speak of their feelings for one another. They circled around it like a big elephant in the room. Not that Liliana minded, not really.
Sebastian had been utterly wonderful to her, and she knew that what he did not say in words, he showed in deeds. It would simply be lovely to hear those words sound in her ears, is all.
Nevertheless, she could wait.
She turned away from the vanity and just then, three rasps knocks sounded on the door.
“Come in!” she called out, but the doors came open before she could finish.
She saw Nora first, and surmised that her sister was simply here for a little chit-chat or perhaps, to announce that Sebastian had arrived.
Then, she saw Lord Rothwell, and instantly, she knew this was beyond a courtesy visit. Her guards rose, of their own accord, and the feeling that something was about to happen nudged at her, too strongly, to be ignored.
She held her peace, knowing there was no reason to be worried, or afraid. Or was there? Nora seemed her usual self, but stepfather wore a grim look?
What was it? Had they come to deliver bad news? Had something happened to Sebastian?
She brushed the thought away as quickly as it came, and willed herself to be calm. There was no use giving into panic. Sebastian was safe.
Forcing a smile on her face, she croaked out. “Father! Nora… I was just about to come down. As you can see, I am ready. Is Sebastian here, already?”
Nora found her place on Liliana’s bed. Lord Rothwell remained standing.
When none of them would say nothing, Liliana looked from her sister to her stepfather…
“Is anything amiss?”
The two shared a look. This time, Liliana could not quell the panic in her heart. Yet, she resisted from asking if any harm had come to Sebastian.
It would be a suspicious question and Sebastian had emphasized that very few people needed to know about his investigations.
Finally, Nora spoke.
“No, Lilly. Of course not.” Her face was all smiles and as she finished, she even let a little giggle go. She was her usual self, once again. Yet, Liliana could still not shake off the feeling that they had something to tell her.
Something that would not sit well with her.
“So, would you two tell me why you have come up to my chamber? I assume it is for a reason, yes?”
Lord Rothwell finally spoke.
“Yes. Sebastian had said he would call upon you at the eleventh hour.”
“Yes, father. He shall be here any time from now, I believe.”
“Good, good. It is just as well. You two have been an item for some weeks now, Liliana. The whole of London knows he is courting you formally.”
“Yes, father. With your permission, of course.”
“And so deserved. Yes. Longcross is a good man. As you know, it is only common for society to be expecting a marriage proposal any time soon. Is it not?”
Lord Rothwell found his way to the small table and chairs she had in her chamber. He plopped himself onto one of the chairs and got comfortable. Liliana remained standing, her guards refusing to back down.
“Yes, father, it is,” she responded, her voice even.
“Oh well, I have been thinking and your sister agrees. Perhaps, the proposal is taking too long? We all know Longcross adores you. And you, you fancy him, do you not?”
Liliana swallowed hard, wondering where this was going.
“Very much, father.”
“A-ha! So it is settled. What more is there to wait for? We all know Longcross joined the season to pick a wife. Now that he has found a woman, suiting to his taste, is it not only expected that he hurries up with the marriage process?”
“Perhaps, he simply wants to take his time, so that we may grow more acquainted, father.”
“Nonsense! In my time, men and women met one another in the week of their wedding and they learned to make their marriage work until death does them part. Whatever acquaintance you wish to grow can be done within the confines of marriage and even more so at that. Also, as a man, I am aware that when a man makes a decision on the woman he would marry, he wastes no time! What keeps Longcross still, pray tell me? Mayhap, he has come to London for an entirely different reason?”
She jerked her head up at that, and as she did, her eyes clashed with Lord Rothwell’s. Something flashed in his eyes. An evil glint Liliana had never glimpsed before.
A sudden chill went down her spine and she wondered what exactly, did Lord Rothwell know? She had never had cause to suspect him afore now.
Yet, when she considered Walsh, how vile a man he was, and his affiliation with Lord Rothwell, it gave cause to wonder, could her stepfather truly be innocent?
In all honesty, they knew nothing of the life this man led before he had taken them in. Mother had said he had been married once but had lost his child and wife at childbirth.
The pain so grave to bear, he had sworn never to take a wife again, until he had met their mother.
After taking them in, Lord Rothwell had done well to keep his business and other activities away from them, except on days when his associates visited.
Even at that, they never knew what they discussed, things the
y were up to.
What if Lord Rothwell was more than Liliana and Nora had been led to believe? What if he was not such a good man? What if he knew something?
No.
Liliana shook her head, wondering how she had arrived at such conclusions. Lord Rothwell had only ever been kind to them. There was no way he would have any affiliations to Lord Leighton’s death. Surely not?
“I cannot tell you why Sebastian has not yet offered marriage, father. All I know is that for whatever reasons his delay might be, he must believe it for the best. He is not the kind of man to act without thoughts. Perhaps, it is as I have said before. He wishes to grow more acquainted. I am in no hurry, father. I am in my prime and the season is yet, young. I can wait.”
Lord Rothwell smiled, ever so sweetly. It made her regret ever thinking him capable of being involved in all of these.
“Lilly, my dear, oh, for how sensible you are, you are still just as naive. Men’s attention is but fickle. Best make the most of this favor you have found in his sight, now that he fancies you still. For who knows, tomorrow, he may decide that he has grown tired of you, and pick another maiden to amuse his interests.”
Liliana grimaced, not liking the way he spoke of Sebastian, and herself, as though she was just a piece of thing to be carried and tossed aside, at will. She swallowed hard, keeping her tongue-tied, aware that Lord Rothwell was not done.
“As your father, and your sole guardian, it is my duty to advise you and do that which is in your interest. You have been too soft in your relations with Longcross. It is time for you to be a little more demanding, persuasive. You must convince Sebastian to marry you in a month. For I am afraid, any longer and you might indeed lose his attention as well as affection. Whatever means possible, make certain that Sebastian offers marriage soon.”
Before Liliana would respond, Hortcroft appeared at the door. The clearing of his throat made everyone turn to him.
“The Lord Longcross is here for the Lady Liliana, he waits below stairs.”
It was Lord Rothwell who responded on her behalf.
“She shall be with him in a bit. Have him know that.”
With a nod and a small bow, Hortcroft turned to leave.
When his footfalls echoed that he was out of earshot, Lord Rothwell spoke again.
“It is a good thing you have the chance to begin today. Make every moment count, Liliana. If he discards you after courting you so publicly, it would be difficult, impossible almost, to find you a decent suitor. No man wants to take another man’s seconds for his wife. I have advised you as any father would advise his daughter. Make every moment count.”
With these words, he rose and walked up to her. As he stood, he reached out to stroke Liliana’s cheeks and it took great will to keep herself from flinching.
Whether he noticed or not, he chose to say nothing. He simply smiled at her, then turned to leave.
When he was gone, Liliana turned to look at her sister, Nora. She was not surprised at all. After all, Nora had once tried to convince her so. Now, she knew her sister had been acting on stepfather’s command.
Her eyes watered, but she held back the tears, knowing she could not afford to ruin her face. Not when Sebastian waited just below stairs.
“Lilly, I…”
Liliana raised her hands, stopping her. “Don’t, Lilly. It would do naught. You came with father, you knew what he would say. You two have made a habit of discussing me in my absence. You know what my stance is on this matter, better than anyone. Yet, you would sit quietly as he forces my hand so. Why? We are twins, Nora! Your loyalty should be to me, not father.”
Her voice was breaking, and a tear had fallen free. she swiped at it, furious that she had crumbled.
“Lilly, we only want the best for you. We are not your enemies. All that father has said is the truth.”
“The truth, so you would have me force a man’s hands into making a marriage proposal. Is that it?”
“Do not make it sound as though we are asking you to commit a grave crime. The Lord fancies you, and you fancy him. It would be for the best, you’ll see. Just do as father says. Longcross shall make you happy, and you shall give him babies. Everything shall be just fine.”
Liliana could not believe her ears. Sometimes, she wondered if she even knew her sister. Or was it that they were right? Was it her who was being difficult?
What if they were truly acting in her best interest? Would she be foolish not to take heed?
Nevertheless, how? How would she make a man propose marriage? How did any woman manage to make a man make up his mind? All her life, she had been told men did only what they deemed fit, not what they were told.
Now is not the time… a voice echoed in her head. It was right. Now was not the time.
She would think of all these later. Much later. Now, she only had to focus on having a lovely time with the man she loved.
“If you would not mind closing the door after you leave, I shall love to have some moment to myself. As you can see, I could use some cleaning up.”
She watched as her sister’s eyes widen with surprise and hurt. She thought Nora would argue, but that did not happen. Instead, Liliana heard her say,
“I shall inform Sebastian that you would be taking some time still. Also, I shall send Sarah up to help.”
“That won’t be necessary. I am capable of cleaning up, myself, thank you. You could pass the word to Sebastian, though.”
Nora nodded, understanding. Then, respecting her sister’s wishes, she slipped out of the room. Just as she left, she called out,
“I’m sorry.”
Liliana nodded, grateful when the door finally closed shut and she was all alone.
She stood in front of the mirror, drawing in deep breaths to calm her nerves. When she felt as though she had them under control once again, she carefully wiped the tears away with her kerchief.
By the time she joined Sebastian a while later, there was not one inkling of the tears she had shed, just before.
In fact, her whole soul lifted upon seeing him and when he smiled at her, her lips curved in return.
As he led her out of the house into the carriage, she silenced the voices replaying the moments in her chamber, choosing to forget her worries for one afternoon, and enjoy this time with Sebastian.
Chapter 26
Despite how hard Liliana tried not to let the conversation with Lord Rothwell and her sister ruined her afternoon with Sebastian, she found herself floating back to those words.
The more she remembered, the more they worried her, and the more distant she grew from Sebastian without even realizing it.
How was she to make a man propose marriage? Lord Rothwell had said through whatever means necessary. What had he meant? What means were there to get a man who knew his own mind, to do a thing like this?
Could Lord Rothwell be right? Could Sebastian’s attention be indeed fickle, and due to wane in a bit? If so, could she afford to lose him? And what if she could not? What would be another option?
Deceive into a marriage he would not find fulfilling? She knew of men’s wandering eyes and minds… she also knew that marriage did not stop them from wandering.
She was not as naive as Lord Rothwell reckoned. She knew many men, Lords, kept mistresses and no one batted an eye. Would Sebastian be one of those men?
Dear Lord, no! She could not bear to share her matrimonial bed. Never! All of life, she had dreamed of marrying a man who would adore her for all eternity, who would respect their vows and never take another woman after her, long as she lived.
She knew Sebastian’s father was one of those men. Surely, he must have taught his sons well?
She spied a look at him, tired of staring at the painting on the wall as though she truly saw it.
Goodness, he was so handsome. Today, he had chosen a grey suit, with a cream colored shirt. He had left his hat in the carriage, letting his hair roam free.
A few strands were proving rogue, and her hand
s itched to put them back into place. From this angle, she could see the side of his face. The line of neatly trimmed hair running to his jaws. His pointed nose, his lips…
It was like the way they had been at the lake, when she had not been able to steal a proper look at him.
Even then, in the dark, he had called to her, and she had thought him handsome, utterly so.
What did he think of her? Had he fallen in love with her, just as she had with him? Did he believe in love? In a marriage filled with such? Or did he have the same standing as her stepfather and Nora?