by Golden Angel
Now that he was at Stronghold, he just felt drained. No more late nights drinking for him. It was amazing the difference between his twenties and his thirties, because he could remember not that long ago when he'd have been up and fine a hell of a lot earlier than he'd woken up today. It made him feel incredibly old, especially when he thought about Lexie.
Maybe the age difference between them was a bigger deal than he'd thought. After a certain point, age differences didn't seem to make much of a difference, but she was still a hell of a lot younger than him. Just because all her friends were older and she acted older most of the time didn't mean that she was actually ready for a relationship with someone who was ready to settle down and soon. Maybe she was still too young for him. Having graduated college, and from the way she talked, he'd thought that they were on the same playing field now, but... maybe he'd been wrong.
Ditching him the second he did something wrong wasn't the action of someone who wanted to be in a real and meaningful relationship. Or maybe it was as Olivia had said, and she'd put him up on a pedestal and didn't know how to deal with it when he proved he wasn't perfect. Either way, he wasn't going to put up with this radio silence from her for much longer. Today she got another free pass, because his head hurt and he was needed at the club, but if he didn't hear from her by tomorrow, he was going to take matters into his own hands. Because, even if she didn't want to be his submissive, if she didn't want to be more than friends anymore, than as her friend, he still deserved better than to be shut out. He'd call her again tomorrow, and she'd better pick up.
Putting his cell phone in his desk, so that he didn't give into the temptation to text her now, he headed out into the club. He paid a cleaning crew to come in and clean the club every morning, and everyone was supposed to clean up their station after using it at night; but every so often, when he needed the cleaning therapy, he would go through and do some additional polishing. There was something incredibly satisfying about polishing the crosses and benches till they gleamed. He also used the time to check over everything that was riveted into the walls, make sure nothing was coming loose.
On a day like today, when he couldn't concentrate on any kind of paperwork, it was exactly the kind of activity that he needed. Mindless, yet important.
He did the upstairs first and then finished down in the Dungeon, not coming back to the main floor until people started to trickle downstairs to scene. The time had passed a hell of a lot more quickly than if he'd just been barricaded in his office - been a lot more relaxing for him too. The muscles in his shoulders and neck had loosened and he was feeling ready for the night ahead.
"Hi Patrick."
"Hey Patrick."
He nodded his own greetings back to the people coming down the stairs as he went up. It never failed to fill with him a sense of satisfaction to see all the smiling faces in his club, knowing that he was providing them with a safe place to come play. Master Will was headed downstairs with Gina again. Nice to know someone's relationship was working out, he thought. Even if his wasn't, he could feel good about other people's.
The bar and Lounge were filling up with people. Doms and Dommes mostly at the bar, subbies kneeling in the Lounge, giggling to each other while they waited to see if someone wanted to play. There were a few subs at the tables around the bar as well, either because they were with someone, they weren't ready to play yet, or they were just there to socialize. Most of the single ones stayed in the Lounge though, to talk with their friends, because they weren't as comfortable surrounded by dominants.
A few people were already on the dance floor, with varying degrees of intimacy, bodies undulating against each other. Olivia was dancing with Lance, a rather beefy sub who came in on occasion. At one point, the guys all thought there might be something between the two of them, because Lance was definitely her type, but Olivia said she needed the scene more than he did. He only came in every couple of months to fulfill his needs in a scene, but outside of the scene he wasn't interested in submitting. Olivia preferred to be in charge ninety-nine percent of the time in the bedroom, which Patrick could understand since he preferred it one hundred percent of the time.
"You look better than you did this morning," Andrew said, when Patrick slid into a seat at the bar next to Maria. Rick was standing behind her, one arm wrapped around her body, his free hand holding his beer as they chatted with Andrew.
"I feel better," Patrick said, smiling at Maria, who ducked her head slightly. It always amused Patrick to see how intimidated she became in the club, because outside of it she was all confidence and sass. "Nice to see you two out and about. Are you scening tonight?"
"Yeah, I've reserved the Locker Room," Rick said, grinning. "Apparently Maria had a thing for the wrestling team in high school."
"What can I say?" she asked, tilting her head back to look at her boyfriend with sparkling eyes. "They were hot. But you're hotter."
"Glad to hear it, gorgeous," Rick said, laughing as he kissed her temple.
As happy as he was for his friends, Patrick couldn't stop the envy that welled inside of him. On the other side of the bar, Andrew was just shaking his head, an indulgent smile on his face. Still, Patrick had to wonder if seeing all these couples was just as hard on Andrew as it was on him. After all, Andrew had been the first to try and have a serious relationship with a woman who was both his girlfriend and his submissive. One which had crashed and burned badly enough that he hadn't tried again. Then again, since he wasn't interested in trying again, maybe it didn't bother him.
"Does that mean you brought one of those unitards to wear?" Andrew asked, amused.
"Hell no," Rick said, scowling as Maria burst into giggles at the idea. "I'd look fucking ridiculous."
"If you were serious about the role-play, you would have," teased Andrew, winking at Maria. "You should have insisted, sweetheart."
"Maybe I'll just suggest the scenario to Hilary," she said, giggling again. They all laughed then, because Liam was dedicated to his role-play, but it was doubtful he could ever be talked into one of those outfits. The farthest Patrick had seen him go was when he'd worn a football jersey to play with Hilary in the Locker Room, a wrestling unitard would be a whole other level.
"Oh fuck..." Andrew suddenly said, his face sobering as he stared towards the door.
Some instinct tapped at Patrick's consciousness, and somehow he knew what he was going to see before he even turned to look.
Lexie.
Of course. Looking stunning in a black bustier with cream colored trim and a black skirt short enough to show off that she was wearing garters and stockings.
No collar.
Her eyes skittered around the room, darting this way and that, and he knew that she was looking for him. The second she saw him, their gazes locked, and her chin lifted defiantly. Then she turned to look up at Master Michael, who had come in with her, and smiled at him. Behind her, Adam was stone-faced and disapproving.
Fuck this.
Fingers gripped his arm, digging in.
"Whatever you're thinking of doing, don't," Rick said softly. "Go to your office and cool off. I'll make sure she doesn't do anything stupid."
To Patrick's surprise, Maria turned her head to look at him and nodded in agreement and support. Relief trickled through him. Even if Lexie wouldn't listen to Rick, he knew she would listen to Maria. He hadn't been thinking about doing anything but going to his office and not leaving until she was gone, because he wasn't playing whatever fucking game she was, but it was good to know Rick and Maria had his back.
"Go, before she comes over here," Andrew said, his voice hard. "Don't let her get any satisfaction from this bullshit."
As much as part of him wanted to march over and claim her, she'd come in with Master Michael and without the training collar. Considering that she'd run out on Patrick two days ago and hadn't talked to him since, he really couldn't receive a clearer sign that she wasn't interested in their agreement anymore. He wasn't going to force her
into something that only he wanted, or use the fact that she used to have a crush on him, if she no longer had those feelings anymore. Sure, he could probably seduce her, but that wasn't going to create anything lasting. Besides, if she actually wanted to be with him, then this little stunt was more than just trying to top from the bottom, it was a downright slap in the face. A childish prod to try and make him dance to her tune.
Maybe it would be better if she could do what she needed, grow up a little maybe, before he tried anything with her again. In the meantime, he couldn't just stand here and act like everything was normal, and he had nothing to say to her right now. All the tension he'd worked off was back, and he knew that if he tried to talk to her now, he'd end up losing his temper and saying something unforgivable.
So he stalked to his office with a single-minded purpose that didn't allow him to look back. Not once.
******
Dammit... Lexie's heart sank as Patrick went straight to his office without even looking at her again. For a second, when she first walked in, she thought she'd seen that possessive need, that heat, in his eyes, and then he'd just shut it down again. It frustrated her that he could do that so easily.
"What the fuck was that?" Adam asked, hissing in her ear as his hand clamped down on her shoulder. Behind her she could hear Angel and Leigh chattering. Pretty much all of Angel's focus had been on Leigh, which Lexie didn't blame her for, but right now she probably could have used the backup. Adam was already pissed enough that Lexie was here tonight. She knew that he'd texted Patrick, but going by the way Patrick had looked when she'd walked in, he hadn't gotten the text.
"What was what?" she asked irritably, trying to shrug him off, but his fingers just dug in as he spun her to face him. Even more annoyingly, Michael didn't seem interested in stopping him, he was too busy looking over the submissives in the Lounge area.
"That little show you just put on for Patrick," Adam growled, keeping his voice low. "Looking at him, and then smiling up at Michael and pretending you're with him. Like you weren't already fucking with Patrick’s head by showing up with another Dom, especially Michael, and without your training collar."
"Fuck off, you have no idea what's going on," Lexie snapped.
"I know that I had to come in last night because Patrick stayed home," Adam said, his blue eyes hard as icicles, stabbing into her. "Jared said he got completely shit-faced last night. I know you decided to show up without your training collar tonight, and now you're trying to fuck with his head some more. If you had an ounce of sense in you, you'd be knocking on his door, getting on your knees, and begging for forgiveness for your disrespect."
Tears sprang up in her eyes, and she tried to tell herself it was because she was pissed, but honestly she was a little hurt too. Adam didn't know what went down between her and Patrick on Thursday, how dare he judge her?! At the same time, she felt a little sick knowing that Patrick hadn't come into the club at all yesterday. Patrick never missed a day at the club, definitely not to stay home and drink. She'd wanted proof that he'd been hurting too, so she guessed she'd just gotten it. Somehow it didn't feel as vindicating as she'd thought it would.
She really hadn't meant anything by smiling up at Michael. It was just that he'd made a low whistling noise that she'd found funny. But Adam wouldn't have been able to hear it, probably, and who knew if Patrick had understood why she'd smiled up at Michael. Dammit. Okay, so she'd messed up a bit there, but that didn't mean she should be the one to go groveling.
"Uhh... Adam, Lex? Everything okay?" Angel had finally noticed that something was going on between her boyfriend and Lexie. His grip loosened, and Lexie jerked away.
"Fine. I was just giving Lexie some advice," Adam said, his voice bland and yet somehow still giving off a flair of extreme disapproval. Jerk. Lexie glared at him, throttling her urge to cry. She wouldn’t give him the satisfaction.
"I'm sure Lexie can figure out her own life," Angel said, rolling her eyes. She reached out and grabbed Adam's hand, smiling up at him. "Come on, I see Rick and Maria." Adam sighed loudly as his girlfriend bounced forward, dragging him along with her. If Lexie wasn't so annoyed with him, she'd be able to admit to herself how cute they were together.
"Come on, ladies," Master Michael said, winking as he pulled both Leigh and Lexie under his arms. "Let's go get something to drink."
Something to drink sounded good. Lexie forced a smile onto her face, although it didn't feel very real. Glancing over at Leigh, she could see the other woman looking around the club as if seeing it with new eyes. New, possibly interested eyes. Man, when Leigh let go, she really let go. Lexie had just thought Leigh wanted to hang out with the Stronghold gang tonight, but it almost looked like Leigh was considering doing a little something more.
Envy panged Lexie.
Yeah, she might not actually be with Patrick, but there was no way she was playing with anyone else tonight either. Maybe eventually, but not tonight. It was too soon, especially knowing that he hadn't even come into work last night. Maybe there was hope for them yet.
It was not the best night that she'd ever had at Stronghold though. Patrick never came back out of his office, although everyone else seemed to stop in there to say hi to him at one point or another. No one stayed in the room long, and from what Liam said, apparently Patrick was elbow-deep in paperwork in there. Lexie couldn't quite gather up her courage to go knock on the door, so she just sat out at the bar with Leigh, and they talked with whoever wasn't scening at the moment.
More than one Dom came by the table, mostly flirting with Leigh, although one or two made a few comments as if they were trying to decide whether or not Lexie was available as well. It made her wish she'd worn the damn training collar, because their assessing looks made her more uncomfortable than anything else. Fortunately she and Leigh were never left completely alone for long, everyone came back when they were done with their scene to chat and hang, and that seemed to be the signal for the other Doms to leave them alone.
The other thing that got under her skin was the way her friends were reacting to her. Not Angel or Leigh, Angel was too focused on making sure that Leigh was enjoying herself, and Leigh obviously didn't realize that anything was going on with Lexie and Patrick. She was out of the gossip loop, but it didn't seem like anyone else was.
Maria had whispered the advice to not scene with anyone tonight. Not like she'd been going to anyway, but it bothered her that Maria seemed to think it would start some kind of drama within the group. Why did everyone think they got a say in her actions?
Andrew hadn't said a word to her all night. He'd just glared. At least Adam managed to act a little more naturally. Liam and Hilary both seemed kind of stilted talking to her, which meant they'd heard something too. Unfortunately, Justin, Chris and Jessica had stayed home... she felt like she could have counted on Jessica to have her back at least. Then again, she didn't need more disapproving stares sent her way by the guys, so maybe it was better the triad didn't come.
She didn't realize, at first, that Olivia didn't seem too happy with her either. That hurt more than any of the others. Olivia always had the girls' backs, but tonight, she seemed to be avoiding talking with Lexie. Even if she wasn't looking at her disapprovingly, the way the guys were, Lexie felt it just as much. Dammit, what made her situation different?
Finally she'd had enough, and when Olivia headed to the women's locker room, Lexie followed. She was waiting by the sinks when Olivia came out of the bathroom stall. The Domme lifted her eyebrows when she saw Lexie standing there, but she didn't look at all perturbed.
"Are you avoiding me?" Lexie asked bluntly. She didn't really feel like trying to tiptoe around the subject.
She hadn't thought that Olivia's eyebrows could climb higher, but they did. Just the look Olivia gave her made Lexie feel like shrinking into herself a little bit.
"I'm not."
"You haven't talked to me all night," Lexie accused.
Olivia huffed a soft laugh as she turned on
the water, bending over the sink to wash her hands. "I've been involved in conversations with other people, Lex. You could have come joined in if you wanted to."
"No one wants to talk to me, except Angel and Leigh," she said, a little miserably, watching Olivia soap and rinse her hands. It was easier to admit that when she wasn't looking the other woman in the eyes, because she didn't want to see pity or approval or... who knew what else. "Even Hilary was being weird with me."
"What did you expect?" Olivia asked, picking up a paper towel, watching Lexie as she dried her hands. "You and Patrick had a major blow up. Did you really think that wouldn't affect the rest of the group?"
"Why should it?" Lexie asked irritably. "It's our lives, no one else's."
"We're your friends. Both of your friends. People are bound to feel more sympathy towards one person over the other, it's human nature. The guys especially don't know what to do, because they feel protective over you, but right now their sympathies are with Patrick."
Lexie made an exasperated sound, frustrated with the whole situation. "So what do I do?"
"Deal with it. Either go and make up with Patrick or accept that it's going to be awkward for a bit while everyone tries to figure out how they're supposed to act and what is and isn't okay to say. They're trying not to butt into your business."
The matter-of-fact tone and lack of sympathy rankled, putting Lexie's back up. "That's not true, they're all glaring at me. I think that counts as butting into my business."
The look Olivia gave her was somewhere between disdainful and pitying. "You're the one that wanted Patrick, pushed him into training you, and then ran out without even talking to him on Thursday. There are consequences to your actions, Lexie. You insist that everyone should treat you like an adult. They are now. Despite the fact that you came here tonight for nothing more than a childish game with Patrick. Did you really think we were all just going to overlook you showing up, disrespecting him and trying to force him into the role that you want him to play? If I wasn’t your friend, I would have blasted you out there in front of everyone for that bullshit. You’re better than that kind of manipulative game Lexie, or you should be."