“Yes, Olivia Harris. What other Olivia would I be talking about?”
“Uh, it doesn’t matter what I think about her but why?”
“She’s interested.”
“And she’s Luke’s sister.”
“What if Luke didn’t care? Would you be interested then?”
“Actually, yeah. I’ve always liked Liv, but Luke will never go for it.”
“Hmm, let me work on that.” I take a peek at his face and smile.
“If anyone can get Luke on board it would be you.”
“What do you mean by that?”
“Come on, McKenzie. How blind are you? There’s only one reason every guy in this school isn’t asking you out. It’s because Luke turns into the biggest bitch if a guy even breathes your way. Stew’s catching so much shit right now.”
“Oh, please. He’s only protective because we’ve been friends since we could walk, and I’m sure you’re exaggerating.”
“Don’t you ever tell Olivia, but he’s way more protective of you, and it’s because he has always liked you. Why do you think he doesn’t date?” Dalton scratches his head. “Damn, I’ve said too much already.
“Anyway, I’d like to go out with Liv, and you can tell her that, but I’ll be shocked if you convince Luke, and he better not be trying to kick my ass tomorrow. The guy has like two inches and twenty pounds on me.”
The halls are filling with students now. I push Dalton’s shoulder with my hand and grin at him.
“He’s not gonna try to kick your ass. He’s a big softy underneath.”
“Are you two finished?” Luke asks after walking up to us in the hall. He looks and sounds pissed. Did he hear us? Dalton glances over at me and smirks.
“Yeah, we’re finished.” He walks away, and Luke falls into Dalton’s spot before we begin walking again.
“What was that about?”
“Can we discuss it outside of school?”
“Are you into, Dalton? Is that why you turned Stew down?”
“Why does it matter to you?” I’m both flattered and irritated that he’s the reason guys have never asked me out. All these years, I’ve thought it was me.
“I’m curious. I don’t want to see you get hurt.”
Cutting through the crowd, I stand at the side of the hallway and turn around, somehow knowing Luke would follow.
“First of all, Dalton is your best friend, so I doubt you’re worried he would hurt me. Second, I would have to actually go out with someone for them to dick me over, yet no one ever asks me out. You wouldn’t happen to know why that is, would you?” I ask bitterly.
He nervously looks away. “No.”
“So, you don’t mind if I go out with one of your friends?”
He sighs loudly and looks back at me.
“If that’s what you want, then no.”
“Fine. I’ll take Stew up on his offer. Ugh, you’re so annoying sometimes,” I feel the tears coming, “and–and confusing.” I stomp away, leaving him behind.
I’m not upset that he sabotaged any dating I could have ever experienced. I’m upset because he hasn’t dated me.
Chapter Three
Luke
We’re already into cross-country season, so I’m at a home meet after school. I get across the finish line, and I’m trying to get my breath, pacing with my hands on my hips, when I spot my sister and Kenzie.
Liv told me they would be here to support me, but I imagine it’s only Liv since Kenzie is clearly pissed at me. I take a glimpse at them again and notice that Dalton, Noah, and Stew have joined them.
Instead of my breathing easing up, I feel it quickening. I don’t think Stew could be sitting any closer to Kenz, and I hate it. When I rejected her, a year and a half ago, she warned me that she would be with someone else eventually. How long do I expect her to wait?
After the meet, I walk over to them.
“Great job, Luke. First place as usual,” Liv says, smiling at me.
“Thanks. Are we grabbing something to eat? If so, I want to shower first.”
“Yep. You can meet us.”
Kenz stands up from the grass and dusts off her shorts. “It’s time for me to go. Mom’s actually home this evening.”
Liv points up at me, from where she’s sitting on the ground next to Dalton. “You can ride with my bro,” she says before giggling. What has her in such a good mood?
“That’s OK. Stew offered to take me home.”
Like hell he will. “Kenzie, I’ll take you. I’m right next door.”
“I don’t mind,” Stew says. I’m sure he doesn’t. He’d like nothing more than to get inside her pants.
She gives me a satisfied smile, and I believe she’s trying to get back at me. Is it because she thinks I’ve been keeping guys away from her?
If so, then she must not want to date me anymore. I barely say bye to everyone before I walk to my car. After I’m home, I take a shower and wait.
It’s embarrassing the way I’m staring out the window, watching for Stewart to bring Kenzie home. Fifteen minutes pass, and I text her, hoping he dropped her off while I was showering.
Me: Are you home?
Kenz: Yes. Why?
Me: I wanted to make sure Stew got you here safely.
Kenz: I don’t need you looking out for me.
Me: I’ll never stop doing that.
Kenz: Why???
Me: I care about you. You know that.
Kenz: Ugh, you drive me crazy!
I don’t reply, unsure of what to say. I’ve avoided her as much as possible since the incident on my bed, in an attempt to shut off the feelings I have for her, but it hasn’t worked.
She was right about me keeping guys away from her. I haven’t told anyone they couldn’t ask her out, but I’ve made it obvious to friends that I would hate it if they did.
If I’m honest, I’ve wanted Kenzie since I’ve been old enough to know what that means, but I would turn it off after we shared “moments,” I’ll call them.
Over the years, we’ve experienced times when something would happen that brought us closer together. The moments were intense between us ... not only emotionally but physically.
During one of those times, over a year ago, I decided to stop letting the “moments” happen, and I was fairly successful until a week ago on my bed.
Kenzie’s gorgeous, and with her body changing, guys have taken notice. It’s getting that much harder to keep them away from her. I’m insanely jealous seeing another dude around her, and I can’t deny it any longer.
Liv has always run interference, never wanting Kenzie and me together, but I can’t sit by and watch Stew snatch her up. She belongs with me.
***
School blows today. Stew makes a point to talk about Kenzie at lunch and in the three classes we have together. He claims she agreed to go out with him, but she didn’t say when, so I still have a chance.
I wonder what she wanted with Dalton. Does she like him, too? I don’t think he’d date her. Over the years, I’ve hinted to him about my feelings toward Kenzie.
After Liv and I get home from school, we find out my grandparents were in a car accident. They’re going to make it, but they’re beat up pretty bad, so Mom and Liv left out of here fast to go to Springfield, Connecticut to see them.
I’m outside playing basketball, trying to release some stress and sexual frustration, when I see Kenzie walking over. Shit. For once, Liv isn’t here to run interference.
I take a shot, and it rolls around the rim before falling in. She walks right past me toward the front door. “Liv isn’t here.”
Kenzie turns around and plants a hand on her curvy hip. “Where is she?”
Holding the ball at my side, I lift my shirt to wipe the sweat from my forehead. When I let it go, I see her eyes lift. I believe she was checking out my abs. Damn, I hope she still likes me, too.
“Grandma and Grandpa Harris were in a car accident. Mom and Liv left about fifteen minutes ago. They’re going to stay wit
h them, and I have a feeling they might be there for several days.”
She begins walking toward me as I turn and take another shot at the goal.
“Are they going to be OK?” Kenzie knows my grandparents about as well as I do.
“Yeah. A doctor at the hospital talked to Mom on the phone. He said they’ll be alright, but I guess they have a long recovery ahead because of their age.” I go after the ball and take a three point shot from the side.
“That’s so sad.”
“Liv will probably text you soon.” I stop playing when I realize Kenzie hasn’t spoken for a minute. Glancing over, I notice she’s wiping tears away with the back of her hand. “I’m sure they’ll be fine, Kenz. Don’t cry.” I stroll over to her, unsure of what to do next.
“They’re sweet, and they feel like my grandparents, too.” She begins to cry harder, so I reach for the back of her head and pull her to my chest.
“Don’t worry, hon. I’m sure they’ll be fine. Dad didn’t even come home from work. If it was more serious, I’m sure we all would’ve went.”
“True.” She reaches her hand up between us and wipes her eyes once more before placing her palm over my heart. Damn, she feels good against me. I drop the ball and wrap my other arm around her.
I try to think back to the last hug I gave Kenzie. It was one day in early summer when we were playing ball against Liv and Jared, our neighbor. He graduated last year and is away at college.
We beat them every game, and I remember hugging her each time. I’ve never been so happy to see a person leave town. He always showed interest in Liv and Kenzie.
***
Age 10:
“We need to practice kissing,” Liv says, looking at Jared, Kenzie and me. “We’ll probably want to kiss someone soon.” We’re sitting in Kenzie’s treehouse, and this is awkward. I might have to rip the heads off Liv’s collector Barbies for this.
“I agree with Liv. We need practice,” Jared says, “and you can’t kiss your brother, so it looks like you’ll have to be my partner.”
Disgusting. I’m not watching this.
“OK, but you’ll have to kiss Kenzie, too. It’d be weird if she kissed Luke.”
I look to Kenz, and her eyes are big and round.
“I’m out of here,” I say before I climb down the steps to the treehouse. I’m halfway home, when I hear Kenzie yelling.
“Wait for me, Luke.” She’s running toward me in her sundress and bare feet. Once she gets to me, she looks away and chews on her lip. She’s also out of breath.
“Can I hang out with you? I don’t want to kiss Jared.”
“Yeah, sure.” We go inside my house and get a glass of Kool-Aid before we sit on my back porch. I don’t say anything. I’m too angry.
“What’s wrong, Luke? You seem mad.”
“It’s weird ... Liv kissing him. It makes me angry. Should I try to stop them?”
“It’s her choice.”
“I guess.” I look over at Kenz and can’t help but snicker. She has a red Kool-Aid moustache.
“What?”
“Your mouth. You have a mustache.”
She tries to wipe it off with the back of her hand, but it’s too late. It’s dried now, but she’s still pretty.
***
Feeling Kenzie pull away, I come out of my daydream. How long have I been hugging her?
“I guess I should go. Thanks for the hug.” She starts across the yard, but I don’t want her to leave.
“Kenzie.” She slowly turns around. “Do you want to hang out? My dad’s working late, so I don’t have anything to do.”
She chews on her lip before finally walking back toward me. “OK. Mom’s working tonight, so I’m alone, too.”
“I need to take a shower. Do you mind waiting?”
“No. I’ll try to get hold of Liv.” She follows me into the house. Our home is older but large, with an upstairs. That’s where Liv’s and my bedroom are.
I’m nervous to be here with Kenzie, and it’s odd we were left alone together today.
Chapter Four
McKenzie
My foot taps on the floor as I sit on the couch and text Liv. Of all days for her to be gone. I thought I’d get more time before I had to tell Luke about her and Dalton.
I get a text back, explaining what happened to her grandparents, and I can’t bring myself to mention I’m alone with Luke. Liv wouldn’t like it. She promises to send an update after she gets there and sees them.
Luke comes downstairs, and I smell his clean scent before he’s near me. His dark hair is messy and still wet. He’s in a different pair of black athletic shorts and a snug Dartmouth t-shirt. It’s the college he’ll be attending.
It’s not an option. His father graduated from there, and it’s expected for Luke to do the same. He’s worked extremely hard to make it happen, too. If everything goes as planned this school year, he’ll get a scholarship for ice hockey.
“You want to hang out in my room where we can listen to music?”
“Um, sure.” I get up and pull my short shorts down farther on my legs. I’m also wearing a pink tank-top since it’s ninety degrees today.
Luke grabs us both a soda before I follow him upstairs. Sitting at the head of his bed like usual, he turns on his stereo with a remote. Justin Timberlake is singing, and I know he has it on that channel for me.
I open my drink and sit at the end of his bed facing him. He tilts his head back against the wall and closes his eyes. Things are different between us, and I don’t know how to fix it.
“Luke, maybe I should go. You seem tired.”
His eyes fly open. “Please don’t. Why don’t you tell me about Dalton?”
“OK. Um, your sister wants to go out with him, so I was talking to him about it.”
“Were you going to run this by me?”
“Of course, but it’s not your decision to make as to whether they date or not. You need to stop scaring guys away from her. She’s almost eighteen.”
“Does Dalton like her?”
“Yes, but he thought he could never date her because of you.”
I look away from him. “I’m getting the impression that a lot of guys feel that way about Liv ... and me. They think it’ll piss you off if they ask either of us out.”
“I told you earlier, if there’s someone you want to go out with, Kenzie, I won’t interfere,” he says, sounding pissed.
“What is your problem? You’ve been different since the last time I was in this very spot.”
“I don’t care if Dalton dates Liv. He’s a good guy. I’ll tell him myself.”
“That was easier than I thought it would be, but you didn’t answer my question.”
Luke stares off, and I want to remind the boy I’m not a mind reader. This is too weird. I get up to leave, but as soon as I go to pass him, he reaches out and grabs my wrist.
I look down at his hand wrapped around mine. He stands and takes my drink before setting it on his nightstand. He still hasn’t let go of my wrist, and I feel my stomach doing somersaults. What’s about to happen?
His eyes come back to mine, and his gaze looks different. He looks different. He’s serious as all get out, and it’s freaking me the fuck out. Shit, he’s right up against me.
When I was under him on the bed a couple of weeks ago, he looked a bit scared, but now, he appears determined and fearless. His hand reaches out and runs down the length of my hair. He towers over me, so I peek up at him.
“Kenz, I am guilty of trying to keep guys away from you. I’m sorry if it’s not what you’ve wanted, but I’m not sorry otherwise.” His hands frame my face, and he skims his thumb across my bottom lip, causing my harsh breaths.
“Um, why?” I don’t know what he’s planning to do next, but every cell in my body is screaming for him to kiss me.
“Because I like you, Kenzie. I always have. I don’t want you with anyone else, and I’m tired of denying it. Please say you feel the same about me since I’m dying
to kiss you right now.”
All I have time to do is nod before I feel his lips on my forehead and then my cheek. He kisses the corner of my mouth, and a heat spreads from somewhere sacred to every inch of my being as I close my eyes.
His mouth softly lands on mine, but I don’t want him to be gentle. I realize at this moment the depth of how much I’ve always wanted Luke. Nothing has ever felt more right. I take hold of his waist, trying to steady myself as our tongues collide.
They’re swirling and caressing and picking up speed, and I want something that I can’t even explain. I whimper, a need consuming me.
Luke’s hands circle my body before he’s yanking me against him and groaning into my mouth. I feel his erection, but this time, he’s not trying to get away. His hold only tightens the longer we kiss.
I pull free, needing to take a breath. He massages the back of my hair and presses his lips to the top of my head. “Damn, Kenzie, kissing you that way is like I always imagined it would be ... awesome.”
My cheek finds his chest before I grin.
“Can we do it again?”
He leans back, and I peer up at him in time to see one corner of his mouth tilt into a smile. Dipping his head, he catches my lips again, making my wish come true.
My eager hands glide along Luke’s waist and up under the back of his shirt, his tight muscles moving under my fingers, stirring something in him.
He begins kissing me harder, wrapping me up in his heated embrace as if he can’t get close enough, and I feel it, too. My body has declared Luke the new sustenance for its existence, confirming what I’ve suspected my whole life. My heart and Luke’s were made to love one another.
“God, Kenzie, can I please kiss you on my bed?”
His breathing is punctuated with a desperate yearning all for me, and I’ve never wanted to scream “yes” so badly in all my life.
I step forward, walking him backward until he falls onto the bed, pulling me down with him. My hands delve into his hair, and I push my body against his.
“Luke.” I want words for how he makes me feel, but I can’t think of any monumental enough.
“I know, Kenzie; I feel it, too.”
Our lips skirt across each other’s, and his fingers slip under the back of my tank top, the warmth of his hands branding me, sealing our fate. Kisses fill our mouths and deepen, and it’s as if we’re living out the first and last kiss we can ever share.
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