by Jamie Begley
“I don’t do one-nighters anymore.”
He raised his head up at that. “Why not?”
Fucker thought he was going to get his something-something from her again. That wasn’t happening.
“I decided I deserve more than leftovers.”
“You’re going to get married before having sex again?” The horrified look on his face had her smiling.
She almost lied, but she had no intention of cutting off her nose to spite her face.
“Hell no. I’m never getting married.”
“What’s wrong with marriage?”
“Husbands fuck around on wives.”
“Not all the time.”
“Most of the time. A woman who kills a man who cheats on her gets a lighter sentence if she’s not married to the fucker.”
Train’s mouth dropped open. “You’ve looked up the statistics?”
She rolled her eyes. “I didn’t have to.” He thought she was being ridiculous. “Wives get charged with first-degree murder. Girlfriends get charged with involuntary manslaughter. I want to get out of prison when I can take a piss without using a bedpan.”
He released her hands, laughing so hard she had to put a hand over his mouth.
“Sh … Sex Piston will—”
Star came jumping into the room with her mother and father behind her.
Killyama clambered off of Train’s lap, giving him a scowl as she righted her clothes.
“Were you tickling Train, too?” Star asked innocently.
“Yes. I was trying to find his funny bone. Lunch ready?” Killyama tried to delay the inevitable questions Sex Piston would ask, not caring that Killyama wouldn’t want to answer in front of Train or Star. Her friend couldn’t care less if she was embarrassed or offended.
“Did you find it?” Star giggled, taking her hand and skipping by her side as they went into the dining room.
Rocky, Sex Piston and Stud’s son, was already sitting at the table, eating a grilled cheese sandwich. Sitting down next to her brother, Star began eating her lunch, as if afraid he would swipe the grapes from her plate. The boy just might. He would shove anything in his mouth, which was why Stud had nicknamed him Rocky after he had to pull rocks from his mouth more than once. He wasn’t outgrowing the habit, either. The adventuresome child would eat anything. Killyama had suggested calling him Iron Man, because his stomach could handle anything.
“No, he doesn’t have one.” Killyama started to pull a chair back from table, but Train did it before she could.
“Yes, I do.” Train smiled at Star, mumbling aside so only Killyama could hear, “Want me to help you find it?”
She elbowed him in the stomach as she sat down.
Killyama ate her sandwich, listening to Train and Stud talk about motorcycles and ignoring Sex Piston’s discerning gaze.
After lunch, Star kept fidgeting in her seat, waiting for Killyama to finish eating. When she did, Star jumped out of her chair.
“Can we go now?” Star grabbed her hand when she stood up.
“Why are you in such a hurry?” Stud’s eyes tried to slow his daughter as she tried to drag Killyama out of the dining room.
“Killyama promised to help me wash my Barbie’s hair. Mama says I make a mess when I do it by myself.”
“Don’t let her talk you into washing the one that has the hair that grows. It’s been washed so much that the hair is falling out.”
“I won’t.” She let Star lead her to her bedroom.
The little girl’s excited chatter had her straining to hear the men leave. It took ten minutes before she could detect the sounds of Stud and Train heading toward the massive garage he had built behind his house.
Killyama was leaning over the bathtub with ten Barbies lined up to take their turns when Sex Piston came into the bathroom. Putting down the lid of the toilet, she micromanaged the Barbies getting their baths.
“Star, what have I told you about going to my bathroom to get my things?”
A soapy hand left a trail of suds on Star’s cheek when she pushed her hair back to eye her mother guiltily. “Your shampoo smells so pretty.”
Killyama wiped her cheek with the edge of a towel. “I’ll buy you another bottle.”
Sex Piston sighed. “It’s the third time she’s taken my shampoo. They’re thirty bucks a pop. You going to buy those, too?”
“Yes.” Killyama squirted even more shampoo on the lifeless doll she was currently holding.
“I don’t care if she uses it. I just want her to ask first before she takes something out of my room.”
“She will next time, won’t you, Star?”
“I promise, Mom. I won’t do it again.”
Sex Piston reached into the cabinet next to her, pulling out a tray of pretend hair tools mixed with real ones she no longer used that she had brought home from the shop, setting them on the counter for them to use later after the Barbies’ hair dried.
“Star, will you go get the white towels on the bottom shelf in the hall closet for me?”
“Yes, Mama.” Star handed Killyama the doll she was washing. “Don’t let Angie drown. She doesn’t swim as good as Kassandra.”
“I won’t.” She turned on the water to remove the shampoo as Sex Piston sunk down next to her, choosing one of the dolls. She gently dunked the doll then shampooed it as if she were doing one of the rich bitches who frequently visited her shop.
“Don’t do it.” The bitch lifted her troubled eyes to hers.
Killyama couldn’t be closer to the woman if they had shared the same blood. Probably closer. She and Sex Piston didn’t fight often, whereas Sex Piston and Diamond fought constantly.
“I won’t.” She knew they weren’t talking about the shampoo.
“I can’t watch you get hurt like that again.”
Setting the doll down on the edge of the tub, she reached for another one. “I’ve gotten him out of my system.”
“Men like Train aren’t easy to get over. I tried to stay away from Stud. So I’m asking you to do something I couldn’t do.”
“Train isn’t Stud and never will be. I’m moving to Knoxville when Hammer finds me an apartment.” She had given in to the idea of Lexington. However, business had become so steady they hadn’t had any time to go look at the apartments Hammer had selected before they had been taken off the market.
Sex Piston bowed her head, meticulously washing the doll. “This is all my fault,” she said, biting down on her trembling lip.
“Stop. I don’t want to hear you say that again. It’s not your fault I like the dude. I swore I wouldn’t be like my mother, and I fell for a man just like my father, if not worse. I should have left town the day I came back from taking that ride from him, but I knew I would miss you all. I’ll get over him. I’ll find someone I will care about more, and then move back home.”
“What if you don’t? What if you never come back?”
Killyama nudged her with her shoulder. “I’ll be back.”
“You swear?”
“I swear. Have I ever lied to you?”
“Yes, when you swore to me you wouldn’t get involved when you heard Stud and me arguing about talking to Knox about Sasha.” Her eyes dropped to the bandana at her throat. The bitch was smarter than others gave her credit for.
“Well, other than that time?”
“No, you never have.”
“You’ll see. I’ll be back before you know it. It’s not going to be hard to find someone. Hell, my only requirement is a big dick.”
Star came back in, holding enough towels so each doll could be dried separately. Setting them on the counter, she slipped between her and Sex Piston.
Seeing her mother’s sad expression, Star handed her the doll she was about to wash off. “You can do Ken, Mama. He likes his hair washed.”
“You do him, Star. I’m afraid I’ll drown him.” Sex Piston stared at the doll vengefully, as if it were Train incarnate.
“I’ll do him.” Killyama took the
doll from Sex Piston, not wanting the girl’s feelings to be hurt.
“Careful,” Star warned. “His head falls off. Mama broke it accidently, and Daddy glued it back on, but it falls off a lot.”
“Does it?” Killyama took her eyes off the doll for a brief second to look at Star. When she turned back, the doll’s head was floating in the sudsy water.
Star fished his head out then took the headless body from her.
“I’m sorry, Star. How about I buy you a new one?” Killyama apologized to the upset girl.
Mollified, she wiggled the head back onto the body. “Can you just buy me a different Barbie I don’t have? I don’t want any more boy dolls. They break too easily.”
Killyama laughed, flicking water on Star’s cheek and starting a water fight. Then the three of them dried off before they finished the dolls.
Killyama enjoyed the afternoon with Star then went into the backyard to play with Rocky as Sex Piston cooked dinner. It was midnight when she drove home to her apartment.
She hadn’t wanted to leave. The love and intimacy in the family always drove home what was missing from her own life, what she never had: her own family.
Growing up, it had been her and her mother, with spurts of appearances from Hammer and Jonas. The only one she had always wanted to be there would show up when no one would know, keeping his identity a secret.
Inside her apartment, she carried her laptop to her bed. After showering, she rested on the bed, letting the cat snuggle next to her as she searched for the doll Star had told her she wanted. Clicking on “purchase,” she checked out before going to another site.
She scrolled down the options available, choosing what she wanted, checking out, and then closing the laptop when the receipt flashed across the screen.
Turning off her bedside lamp, she nuzzled her cat. “Who do you think he’s with tonight? Sasha, Jewell, or both?” The stupid game she played in her mind ripped her to shreds, but she couldn’t help from playing it. The scenarios of what went on in the clubhouse at night played differently every night until she fell asleep. It was a fucked-up way of replacing counting sheep.
Before she had seen Crash and Rider the night she had spent at The Last Riders’ clubhouse, she had imagined Train with only one of the women. Since then, she had begun imagining him with two or three of them a night.
Unable to fall asleep, she reached for the radio on her nightstand, pushing a button on the top. The soothing sound of thunder and rain filled the dark room. She started to count the seconds between the claps of thunder.
She had lied when she told Sex Piston she had ridden Train from her consciousness. There wasn’t going to be any getting over Train. She had instinctively known she would fall in love with him when he had walked across the parking lot the day they had gone for a ride.
She had inherited her mother’s flaw. Only one man had been able to hold her heart. Even in his death, she still mourned him. Though several men had tried to capture the heart that had already been taken, none had succeeded. Her father had made sure of that, secreting her mother away in a small town where no man could live up to the hero worship her mother felt for him.
Train was on the flip side of the same coin. Neither one truly cared about the women in their lives. He would happily share her with any of the men in the club. Hell, probably the women, too.
He was never going to love her. He would only care for her like he did all the women, but there wouldn’t be anything special between them. She bet if the women were grouped in a dark room, none of the men would be able to tell them apart, other than the tits.
Killyama took the thought back. Shade would be able to tell. He watched Lily with a hawk-like intensity. The woman didn’t take a breath before he made sure it was pure enough to enter her body.
Killyama didn’t know if she wanted a man so possessive, but damn, it would be nice to see what it could be like. To feel the warmth of someone’s love battle the frigid emotions that were seeping into her soul.
“I have a better chance of catching Dalton Andrews,” she said out loud to the cat.
Lily had met the movie star when she had visited some friends. He had made the news last year when his wife had succumbed to cancer, leaving him a widower. She would give herself a couple of years to get over Train, and let Dalton Andrews get over the famous fashion model, before she asked Lily if she could hook them up.
“What do you think, Gollum?” She nodded in the dark as if the cat agreed with her ludicrous plan. “I could buy you all kinds of toys if I nabbed him.”
Giving up trying to fall asleep, she turned on a movie that she had watched dozens of times. She was asleep before the first fight scene, tossing and turning as Dalton Andrews and Train fought in her dreams. She could see herself cheering the two men on.
Just as she thought Train was winning, another man grabbed him from behind.
Killyama woke up terrified, gasping in fear. She almost fell out the bed as she searched for her cell phone on the nightstand.
It took five seconds for Sex Piston to answer. “Bitch, do you know what time it is?”
“You don’t sound like you were asleep.” Killyama could hear Stud grumbling in the background, telling Sex Piston to hang up the phone.
“I wasn’t,” she snapped, her voice coming and going as if she were struggling for the phone. “What do you want?”
The terror of her dream was ebbing away like most nightmares do when you wake up. She should have washed her face before she made the call. The shock of the cold water would have saved her from making a fool out of herself.
“Do you need me to come over? Are you okay? Give me time to get dressed—”
“No! I’m fine! I just need you to do something …” Feeling ridiculous, she was also too afraid to go back to sleep until Sex Piston did what she wanted. “Uh … Could you go throw that Ken doll away?”
Silence meant her request.
“Sex Piston?”
“What’d you snort?” The sound of Sex Piston and Stud tussling for the phone stopped.
“Nothing! Just do it. And don’t throw it out in the kitchen trash. Make Stud throw it away outside.”
Again silence.
“Listen, I know it’s crazy as fuck, but just do it, okay?”
Sex Piston’s long drawled out “Okay” had Killyama gritting her teeth.
“Thank you. Tell Stud I’m sorry for bothering him.”
“I will. You know I’m never letting you play with Star’s dolls again, right?”
“Believe me; I won’t be going near them.” Killyama started to disconnect the call. “Sex Piston!”
“What!”
Killyama winced. Sex Piston had cruised past concern for her friend’s mental state and had moved on to aggravation.
“Make sure you don’t forget the head.”
19
“Good luck!” Stud hit Train on the back as he lifted his helmet to put it on. Train buckled the strap as the man he was beginning to think of as a friend took his own motorcycle.
He had called Stud and asked him for help getting into the race after Shade had told him that Lily and Beth were planning to take a mommy day off to watch Stud race with Sex Piston and her crew.
He had raced when he had first started riding a motorcycle, wiping out more than winning. He had stopped when he had entered the service and hadn’t picked it up again when he was discharged. It didn’t provide the same excitement he had grown used to after he had been picked for a secret unit controlled by the president.
Members from several different military branches had been hand-selected to try out once a year for the unit. Each current team member also had to be re-invited to try out, with over two hundred candidates chosen to compete. Only twenty-four would be picked for the elite unit. Train had made the unit each time. Hammer had made the team five years before he had and had continued to get picked.
The last time they had been called out, they had rescued a group of four men taken host
age. When he arrived to gather intel, Hammer had informed the fellow members that it would be the last time he would try out if asked.
Losing Jonas the year before that had been a shock. The members had always joked that Jonas and Hammer were attached at the hip. Losing two high-ranking members hurt.
When Train had asked Hammer why he was giving it up since Hammer had lived and breathed the American flag, he had evaded the question, saying he was giving the young guns a chance to make the unit.
Train had figured out the why when he had read Crash’s reports. Jonas had quit the unit when Killyama had begun bounty hunting full-time in the business the three of them had formed. He wanted to be there to protect her from the caliber of fugitives she had been chasing the previous year.
She was taking her life in her hands each time she accepted a job, which was why Hammer had decided not to try out for the unit again. He was placing Killyama over the job he loved, afraid Jonas couldn’t do it alone.
He wanted to know what tied the three of them together. Even Shade couldn’t figure it out. Shade was a member of the same team, except he was given special consideration over which jobs he took and how. He was the lone wolf in the unit; often sent out without other members’ knowledge.
Stud gave Train a thumbs up as he started his bike. Train tightened his gloved hands on the bike he would ride in the race, one Rider had loaned to him from his personal collection. He was going to have to get one of his own if he was going to continue to compete to impress Killyama.
He took a quick look around while he waited for the race to start. Killyama was sitting in the front row on the second floor of the stands next to Sex Piston, who was sitting next to Beth and Lily. Crazy Bitch was sitting on the other side of Killyama, with the rest of the bitches seated down the rest of the row. The women looked excited as they waited for the race to start.
The men seated behind them didn’t exhibit the same of air of excitement. Their set faces showed how much they wanted to be anywhere else. That was, everyone except Rider, who was munching on popcorn, drawing killing gazes from Shade and Razer.