by Miley Maine
As expected, I saw his truck parked outside the house as I approached. When he caught a glimpse of my appearance in his side mirror, he got out of the vehicle and leaned against it with one shoulder.
Looking in my direction as I took each step nearer, his eyebrows were wrinkled. He crossed his arms and said nothing, waiting for me to become close enough.
As the distance between us shrunk, I stood in front of him with only a few inches separating us.
“I’m sorry.” My eyes locked on his as I portrayed as much courage, that I possibly could.
He looked away, the expression on his face a little hurt. “You alright?”
I resisted smiling at the thought that he worried about me. “Yes.”
“C’mon.” Turning around, he gently placed a hand behind my back as he led me into the house. His palm barely touched the fabric of my dress, and I knew he was trying to maintain a distance.
The moment we got into the house, and he closed the door, I sprung around to face him. “Danny.” I raised my voice an octave. “I am terribly sorry for running off like that. But I haven’t been completely honest with you.”
Leaning with his back against the door, his arms were still folded in front of his chest. The serious expression on his face only became graver for a second before his features began to soften.
In an unspoken invitation for him to come closer and relax, I walked over to the living room couch and sat down. My eyes pleaded with him to join me.
Letting out a sigh, he uncrossed his arms, and he let his shoulders slouch a bit. He took off his hat and hung it up on the hook by the door before taking a few steps toward me.
“Gigi.” He shook his head as he leisurely put one foot in front of the other. “I don’t think there's anything you can tell me that would change the way I feel about you right now.”
His confession took me by surprise. Were his feelings for me really that strong? And so soon?
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. He was surely going to change his mind when he heard what I had to say.
My heart started to beat faster.
“I really appreciate you saying that, but—” I couldn’t stop the bitter smile from taking over my expression.
Reducing the space between us to almost nothing, he came closer until his boots almost touched mine. Crouching down, his face was now at my eye-level. He smiled at me, and my insides melted.
“I think I’m falling in love with you,” he whispered. “In the short period you’ve spent here, you’ve affected me so much more than anyone I’ve ever met. I can’t think about going back to living without you here.”
What?
“Please, just tell me what it is,” he continued with a tender tone. “What went wrong? I’ll do anything.”
Mesmerized, I couldn’t control the rhythm of my breathing anymore as my chest unevenly rose and fell.
I had to tell him now.
“Danny, I’m pregnant, and my ex is the father,” I quickly blurted it out, making sure not to break our intense eye contact.
“What?” His eyebrows crumpled so tightly they could have merged.
I quickly continued, waving my hands. “He has no idea.” I shook my head in a frenzy. “I don’t want to be with him, and I don’t want him involved in my baby’s upbringing.”
“I thought you said he wasn’t a bad person.” He tilted his head, anger becoming more evident on his face.
“He’s not.” I paused. “By measures of society, he’s not. But he’s not good for me. He’s actually bad for me, Danny. His presence in my life, somehow, made everything toxic. Sometimes I felt like I couldn’t breathe.”
As though he were lost for words, I could tell that it was the first time for him to not be able to respond. He stared at me for a moment that felt like an eternity. His dark eyes pierced through mine, imploring them for a sign that I was telling the truth.
I could feel the tears rushing in and blinked quickly. I didn’t want him to see me cry.
“I swear to you,” I whispered. “I know I should’ve said something.”
Swiftly pushing himself up, he stood and started pacing across the room. On his face was a mixture of disappointment and loss.
He shook his head. “But I can’t—” His feet stopped in their tracks as he quit talking mid-sentence. And then he looked back at me and shrugged in defeat. “But I love you.”
The way he stressed it touched my heart.
I thought I was falling in love with him, too. But the situation was far too complicated for me to give myself that right.
“Aren’t you gonna say anything?” he urged me.
When I looked back up at him, he had the most unreadable expression on his face. The man was too strong to be defeated, and I had surely put him in an unenviable position.
I sighed. “I have no right to—”
“Stay.”
“What?”
“Stay, I want you to stay. Here. With me.”
Not fully registering what he had just said, I raised my eyebrows in disbelief.
“I’m still the same man you agreed to stay with when you first got here. All I’m asking is for you to keep doing that.”
I was completely perplexed, unable to say anything.
He looked at his watch and muttered a cuss from under his breath. “Listen, I’ve got a meeting back at the office. I have to go. But please, please be here when I get back. We still need to talk. I don’t want you to leave, okay?”
Speechless, I nodded, lowering my gaze as my mind was plagued with embarrassment.
He quickly launched toward me, grabbing my hand and raising it as he bent down. He planted a quick kiss on my fingers before swiftly turning away, grabbing his hat, and getting out of the house.
The second I heard the door slam shut, I sharply exhaled, looking around me in a daze.
What had just happened?
My mind was frazzled, and for a few minutes, I just sat there, my eyes aimlessly staring at the bright fabric of my dress.
Not only was he being exceptionally good to me, but Danny Downton just confessed his love.
What was fate holding? What sort of promise was all of that giving me?
And why did things suddenly become insurmountably messy?
Was he aware of what he was saying, or was it the shock talking?
Did he realize exactly what he was asking of me?
Baffled, I slowly got up and headed up to my room. The best thing I could do at the moment was take a long shower before deciding on what to do next.
When I got out of the bathroom, I realized that the house was still empty. Danny’s work must have been dragging on, which gave me an opportunity to organize my thoughts.
The least I could do was cook us dinner, so I made my way toward the kitchen and got started. As a way to distract myself, I went through the several electronic devices in the living room until I located the radio. I hit the power button and let some country tunes fill the air as I cooked.
I tried not to think about falling in love with him, but it was all I could think of. There I was, in his home, in his kitchen, preparing a meal for him to make up for the horrible day this had turned out to be.
I caught myself thinking about love as I chopped the vegetables, boiled the pasta, and melted the cheese. Nothing I did went by without me feeling like I was pouring pure emotion into the meal I was creating.
If only people could taste how much we cared for them in our cooking.
He was such a good man—possibly the best human being I had ever met. And there I was, being utterly unfair to him and his wonderful heart.
When he came back home, I was done with cooking and spending time alone in my room. For some reason, I didn’t feel like I deserved to enjoy his porch or house anymore.
I was beyond ashamed.
A knock gently pounded on the door.
“Come on in.”
He peeked inside. “Somethin’ smells good downstairs. Care to explain it?”
>
How did he still have the mental space for joking?
I tittered, “Wanna shower until I warm it up?”
“Sure thing.” He gave me a humble smile before closing the door.
Taking a deep breath and slowly letting it out, I got up from off the chair by the window and made me way out of the room. I braced myself for the rest of the conversation.
As we sat down at the table, Danny’s face was extremely relaxed. He seemed to be completely in his element, and I secretly wondered what that was all about.
“Thank you.” He started scooping food onto his plate.
“For what?” I shrugged.
“This meal. And still being here.”
“You’re welcome for the first. And you have all the right to ask me whatever you want. I know it wasn’t right, hiding it from you. Especially—”
“Especially?”
“That I was aware of our chemistry from the get-go.”
A satisfied smile shone on his face as he began to eat. A moment later, he nodded in appreciation. “You really are a good cook.”
“Thank you.”
I chewed, yet could barely taste the food as I waited for him to broach the subject. In contrast, he made sure to talk about anything but, with a funny story here and an anecdote there.
When we were done eating, I stood up to clear the table. He stopped me with one wave from his hand. Pushing his chair back, he got up and walked over to where I sat.
“Gigi.” He took my hand and got down on one knee.
I held my breath.
What the hell was he doing?
“I know none of this makes sense right now. But will you marry me?”
A gasp escaped my lips, and I couldn’t control the stunned expression on my face.
“Danny, I—” I shook my head, still in shock.
“I mean it.” His commanding voice rang through the air.
My brain froze. I couldn’t think straight. As a matter of fact, I couldn’t even move.
“That would be…” I finally formulated the words. “So unfair to you,” I whispered.
“I’m a grown man, Gigi. I know what’s good for me, and I make my own choices. This is not a rash decision. I thought about this.”
I shook my head, barely able to speak. “I don’t think I shou—”
“Don’t,” he interrupted me, his index finger hovering in the air an inch away from my parted lips. “Don’t say somethin’ we’ll both regret.”
Letting out a hot sigh, I couldn’t comprehend or believe the speed at which his brain worked. Was he really asking me to marry him?
“Maybe it’s best if I think about it.” I desperately wanted him to take some time and consider what he was doing.
Without letting my hand slip away from his fingers, he pulled the chair next to mine and sat on it. “Do you think you’re falling in love with me?”
Oh my God.
It was all too much to process.
Yes, I was falling in love with him.
No, I didn’t think it was right or reasonable.
Yes, I wanted him with every cell in my body.
No, my heart wasn’t objecting to any of it.
But, yes, my mind was struggling to justify all of it.
I couldn’t give him an answer. Neither could I move my eyes from his.
His beautiful, sexy brown eyes. The eyes filled with an enormous amount of love.
Who knew that a cowboy was capable of feeling so much so fast?
“Gigi, if you love me, you’d know,” he insisted.
But I had finally decided that admitting to any feeling right now would complicate things even more, instead of clarifying them.
“I think I need to go to bed,” I whispered, slowly standing up as I let him gradually let go of my hand.
I marched upstairs, incapable of developing a single logical thought.
When I woke up the next day, I realized that I had only slept for a couple of hours. I had struggled to get my shuteye since thoughts of Danny and his questions rummaged through my head like a hurricane.
He was nowhere to be found, and I figured he must have gone to work already. After all, it was a little past seven.
After making myself some tea and toast, I went back up to my room with the stern decision to get some writing done. After all, I was wasting too much time and I knew I could use it better if I started to work on a new project. Following an entire hour of wrestling with my mind to shape a proper string of thoughts, my fingers started hitting the keyboard like there was no tomorrow.
For a few hours, I managed to push all reflections of Danny and my dilemma out of my head and focus on working.
At around four in the afternoon, I realized how much time had passed. Could he have come back and gone without me hearing anything? I got up and made my way downstairs to check. He wasn’t home, nor had he returned for lunch. Or at least, there weren’t any signs of him doing so.
Resigning to the fact that I had better leave him alone, I made myself a cup of herbal tea and went back upstairs to resume my work. For some reason, I was neither hungry nor had any appetite to regard.
When the clock hit six, I decided that it was time for dinner. Whether or not I wanted to eat was beside the point. Danny was bound to eventually return, and the least I could do was have a hot, home-cooked meal waiting for him.
As I stood in the middle of the kitchen, opening cabinets and rinsing plates, I heard the door open and Danny’s voice addressing someone. “Put it right here,” he said.
I turned around to see him with Michael, both carrying half-a-dozen shopping bags and a large box.
“Howdy, Miss. Mans.” Michael greeted me with a grin and a nod, his fingers politely touching the brim of his hat.
“Hi, Michael.” I looked at Danny, who silently smiled at me. “I’m making dinner. Would you like to join us?”
“Thanks, ma’am. Family’s waitin’ on me.”
“Oh. Say hello to everyone, will yah?”
“Sure thing.” He then turned to Danny. “Need anythin’, boss?”
“Bless ya, Mike. Have a good one.”
Michael quickly left the house, closing the door behind him as he left me and Danny with a little pile of bags between us.
I didn’t want to pry.
“Dinner should be ready in about 20 minutes.” I forced a grin and sprung around back into the kitchen.
“Wait up,” he hollered across the foyer. “These are for you.”
Squeezing my eyes shut, my steps came to a halt before slowly rotating me to face him. I lowered my gaze at the bags, tilting my head as my eyes questioningly met his.
“What’s all this?”
“You only got one dress the other day, but now I know your size.” He pulled out for different dresses in varying lengths.
“Danny, you shouldn’t have.”
“And you only have one pair o’boots. Got ya some sandals, they’re more comfortable on hotter days around the garden.”
Fascinated, I kept moving my eyes between the different items.
“And, well…” He paused, placing both hands on his waist. “I don’t know how far along you are.” He picked up one of the bags. “But you ain’t showing yet. I thought this would look amazing on you when you do.” From the bag, he revealed what looked like a maternity dress in a gorgeous black fabric with tiny red flowers.
“Oh my gosh.” Both my hands covered my mouth as I slowly shook my head.
“And this—” He pointed at the box.
“Stop.” I raised both hands in the air, shutting my eyes as my forehead wrinkled.
When I opened my eyes a moment later, he was still standing there, looking completely stumped.
“Danny, I don’t think I can accept any of this stuff.” Enunciating, I tried to make my voice as clear as possible.
“Why the hell not?”
“Because.” I shook my head in confusion as I took a couple of steps back. “It doesn’t feel right.”
>
“They’re just gifts.”
“I know. I—”
Rubbing my forehead with my palm, I really needed to think.
Chapter Seven
Danny
For the rest of the evening, I didn’t get to see Gigi at all. She had left the food for me on the table and didn’t come out of her room at all until I went to bed.
Concerned that she hadn’t eaten, I made her a plate and took it to her upstairs. When I stepped into the room, she was sitting in the armchair by the window, gazing outside. Her writing was laid out on the side table, but she wasn’t working when I went to see her.
I wished her a good night and left her alone.
The ball was now in her court, and I could tell that she was struggling with a myriad of feelings I knew nothing about.
Who cared if we hadn’t known each other for long? My parents were high school sweethearts and look where their marriage had wound up? With him becoming cruel and abusive, and with me running away.
Many marriages were built on long relationships and extended love affairs, and to what end? Half of them were terminated with ugly divorces anyway.
And, so what if she were carrying another man’s baby? I was my father’s own flesh and blood, and he had treated me worse than he would a homeless man he had never even met.
Things weren’t so black and white.
I understood that. She clearly didn’t.
Tossing and turning in bed, I couldn’t get myself to sleep. I was devastated because she couldn’t see the meaning behind my gifts. Because she wouldn’t even let me show her the cot mattress I had bought or the drawings for the wooden crib I had wanted to build.
Quickly and hopelessly, I had fallen head over heels for that beautiful woman who showed up at my door without warning. And now…
Now I felt like I was losing her, just as swiftly and without preludes.
Wide-eyed and disillusioned, I spent the night staring at the ceiling and begging for the sun to rise.
With the first light, I shoved the covers aside and got out of bed, ready for another attempt to make her understand how I truly felt.
Knowing that she wouldn’t wake up before seven or eight, I took a long shower and put on something both comfortable and appealing. I went for my favorite pair of dress jeans and a white tee.