“It’s complicated,” I offer, still trying to make sense of it all in my head. I’m not sure I can explain the confusing and conflicting emotions swirling around inside me to anyone else.
“Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if we could figure out who her mystery kisser is,” Alli chirps in.
“Did you check in with your friends and party guests?” he asks like we haven’t thought of the idea already. “Maybe somebody recognized his costume or invited him.”
“We did, but no one knew who he was,” I reply with a shrug. “He appears right before he kisses me and leaves right after. No one sees him arrive and because the party has grown big over the last few years, no one sees him leave.”
“What if you have a lookout?” he suggests. “Maybe Alli can be your wingman?”
“We tried it last year, but he didn’t show up until the very end and by then she was—er, preoccupied,” I answer him, careful to leave out the part about Alli and some guy dressed up as a storm trooper. Not that I have to tell him those details, he already knows his sister and can put two and two together. He looks at her and sighs.
“What?” she exclaims and throws her hands up defensively. “How was I supposed to know? We waited for him the entire party.”
“It’s the point of a lookout, Alli, because we didn’t know if or when he would show up.” I roll my eyes at her, feeling a slightly annoyed but guilty just the same. It wasn’t fair to ask her to be my lookout, but she’s the only one I trust with this whole thing.
“Cancelling the party isn’t going to solve this mystery, Mere,” Dimitri points out before shifting in his chair.
“What if he doesn’t show up?” I ask, feeling a wave of panic as the words come out. “What if he does? What if he kisses me and I feel nothing? What if we find out who he is, and he turns out to be some crazed lunatic?”
“Whoa, Mere, slow down.” Alli reaches out and grabs my hand, finally understanding everything I’ve been thinking and feeling about this whole thing. “I didn’t realize it was bothering you this much.”
“Alli, what if we never find out who he is?” I finish, boiling it down to the one thing that bothers me the most. “I can’t live like this. I was fine with it the first time and even the second time, but after last year, and the things I felt throughout the party waiting for him to show up—I can’t do this again.”
“Then you move on,” Dimitri states matter-of-factly. “It’s only a kiss, Mere.”
In many ways he’s right, but those kisses have rocked me deep down into my soul. They’ve taught me not to settle for anything less than the way they make me feel. And no matter how hard I’ve tried, no one has made me feel the way they do.
These kisses have helped me get over my feelings for Dimitri, which is why I can say all of this in front of him without worrying about what he thinks of me.
“Of course you’d say that.” Alli glares at him. Dimitri’s always been a player, but not the sleaze ball kind. He’s clear up front with any woman he chooses to be seen with what will come of their time together. He’s the master of walking away if someone become too clingy.
“Maybe he’s right though,” I interject, causing Alli to frown at me. “Let’s hear him out.”
“Whoever this guy is, is just that—a guy. No matter how good his kisses are, it doesn’t mean you’re beholden to him. If he isn’t everything you want him to be then walk away. At least you got a few good kisses out of it.”
“Seriously, who the fuck are you and what did you do to my brother?” Alli gawks at him and he shrugs it off.
“You deserve nothing less than happiness,” he continues, now showing a different side of him—one we don’t see often. His eyes intensify on me. “Don’t let some mystery kisser keep you from living and experiencing life to it’s fullest.”
I wait a moment, letting his words sink in.
There are two ways this can go down. Either we cancel the party, taking away any chance of learning who my mystery kisser is, or go on as planned and deal with whatever the outcome is.
But he’s right. Three kisses don’t mean I have to be with this guy, hell, they don’t even mean I have to kiss him again if he does show up. But knowing I have options helps me make the decision.
Shit.
“Alright, we won’t cancel the party. But Alli, I really need you to be by my side. You can’t get distracted this time,” I tell her, feeling guilty but also anxious. I want to know who this guy is, good or bad.
“Fine, but you owe me,” she agrees reluctantly.
“Excellent. Alli and I will put our heads together to come up with a game plan—” Dimitri starts but Alli cuts him off.
“Game plan?” she asks with a frown.
“Yes, I’m going to be there,” he states and crosses his arms. “You did invite me, didn’t you?”
“Yeah, but I was trying to be nice,” she explains while mimicking his movement and crossing her arms. “I didn’t think you’d take me seriously. You’ve never accepted any of the previous invitations.”
“You invited him?” I ask but they both ignore me.
“I wasn’t able to attend in the previous years. This year I can,” he states with a sly smile. For a moment I think he’s pulling Alli’s leg but the look in his eyes says otherwise. He’s serious. “What harm could one more pair of eyes be?”
It wouldn’t hurt and knowing Alli, she’ll get distracted again and we’ll never get to the bottom of this mystery.
“He’s right,” I interject before Alli can argue any further. She shoots me a ‘what the fuck’ look because this is the second time I’ve agreed with Dimitri. Usually I would give into her when it comes to him, but I have to listen to the little voice inside me agreeing with him. “Besides, if Dimitri is there maybe you won’t have to miss the entire party.”
I take a breath and brace myself for her argument. A moment passes before she sits back in her chair and relaxes. She knows he’s right too. We have a better chance with Dimitri there.
“Fine,” she lets out a loud audible sigh. I know she doesn’t like teaming up with her brother, they are both naturally competitive, but she’s going to have to get over her hang ups. At least for now. “How are we going to do this?”
Meredith
The party has been going to a couple hours now, and it feels like there are more people here this year than there have been in the years prior. A lot of our friends have traveled from all over to attend, but I wonder if Alli sent out more invitations than we agreed on. Then again, maybe she was right about us being famous for this event.
I scan the room for the thousandth time tonight, searching every costumed face for the simple black mask ingrained into my memory.
This year I kept my own costume simple, choosing a simple black dress, black tights and head band with cat ears. Alli was appalled by it, but I didn’t have the energy to invest in something more creative, and I wasn’t about to let her choose something for me. If I’d done that, I would probably be half naked right now, worrying about whether or not certain body parts were properly covered.
“No sign of your mystery man?” Dimitri’s deep voice purrs from behind me, and for the first time in a long time, it affects me and sends wave of desire through me.
Shit, how much have I had to drink tonight?
“Not yet,” I murmur, fighting the tipsy urge to lean back against him for support. My legs feel like jelly and I worry I might not be able to stay upright if he continues to affect me this way. “But there’s still plenty of time.”
“It’s probably a good thing I volunteered tonight,” he chuckles and moves beside me. He lifts a hand and points at something across the room. It’s Alli and she’s pressed against the wall, playing tonsil hockey with one of the football players dressed as the living dead.
“She can’t help herself,” I murmur with a shrug. I’m not surprised to find her necking with some guy, it’s who she is, and I can’t fault Alli for it. She knew with Dimitri helping out tonig
ht, she’d be able to enjoy herself more. I look over at him and notice he’s wearing a white button up shirt and black slacks. “Where’s your costume?”
“I’m a little old for dressing up, don’t you think?” he asks with a side look. For as long as I can remember, Dimitri’s never been big on the Halloween gig. I laugh with a hiccup and lift my drink to my lips.
“How much have you had to drink?” He takes the red solo cup from my hand and sets it down on the table next to me. I want to object but I stopped counting after the second cup. He reaches for a bottle of water and hands it to me.
“Drink this,” he orders with a stern voice. I open the bottle and toss my head back to guzzle the cool liquid. My body cool a few degrees from it, clearing my head a bit. Dimitri takes the empty bottle from my hand and replaces it with a full one. “Only water from this point on.”
“Bossy much?” I lift an eyebrow at him, and he leans down with a smirk. The closer he comes, the darker his eyes grow, and I recognize something carnal inside of him.
“You have no idea,” he growls before walking away, leaving me choking on my tongue and confirming my suspicions about him.
Holy shit. I shake my head trying to pull my focus from his retreating form, and the thought of him bossing me in a completely different way.
DIMITRI
“Heeeeello handsome.” A redhead dressed as a naughty nun sidles up to me and presses her nearly exposed chest to my arm. “Are you looking for some company?”
She’s nothing like the type of woman I prefer, and she’s got on enough makeup for a circus clown troop. The mess of curls on top of her head reeks of cheep hairspray, perfume and too much booze.
“I’m not,” I clip as I try to shake her off. But she clutches my arm tightly, refusing to let me go.
“Come on, handsome, let’s go find somewhere private and I’ll give you a reason to say your Hail Mary’s in the morning,” she purrs and sticks out her lower lip to give me a pout. She rests a finger against my chest, as she attempts to give me a ‘come hither’ look, that can only be translated into a woman who’s had entirely too much to drink.
I blink down at her with disdain. “It’s not going to happen.”
“Why not?” She grips my arm harder and thrusts her hips against me. “Are you gay or something?”
“No, but I’m not desperate either,” I sneer, watching the shock hit her face as my insult pierces her drunken state. She releases my arm and her face scrunches with annoyance.
“No, you’re an asshole—”
I don’t hear the rest because I turn and walk away, forgetting about her the moment my eyes find Meredith leaning against the wall.
Fuck, I swear as I feel a familiar tightening in my pants. She looks flawless tonight, despite the simplicity of her costume and makeup. Those are some of the things I like best about her. She isn’t fake and she’s comfortable in her own skin. She has a confidence most women don’t learn until later in life, and it’s sexy as hell.
I honestly don’t know what I was thinking offering my help tonight, but I’ve always had a soft spot for her.
You have a funny way of showing it.
It’s true. I’ve been an outright ass to her at times, but there’s so much at stake when it comes my feelings for her.
She’s my sister’s best friend. Our mothers are best friends. Our fathers spend every waking moment they can fishing. There isn’t a single memory in the last eighteen years where our families weren’t together. The last thing I need to do is put any of that in jeopardy, which is why I’ve always kept my distance with her.
Except those reasons are complete bullshit.
Being with Meredith wouldn’t destroy our families. It would strengthen them. Our parents, especially our mothers, used to talk about what it would be like if our family was bonded in another way.
No, I stayed away because she wasn’t ready for me.
Even though Meredith has always been sure of what she wanted in life, she hadn’t spent a lot of time experiencing the world around her. Until college. Something changed for her, and I decided to wait and watch. I wanted her to have those precious life experiences, even if that meant watching her have them with other guys. In the end, it was worth all the frustration because she’s become more resolved in her reasoning to wait for that feeling, as she describes it. She needed those experiences.
And I wanted them for her.
Until now.
Fighting the way feel about her has only become more difficult the older we’ve become, and believe me, I’ve tried for years to forget about her, to move on. But I’ve never met a woman in my life who could hold a candle to Meredith.
Mine, a voice inside of me growls and it takes everything inside of me to stay put because all I want to do is cross the room and kiss her senseless. I want to make her forget about the masked kisser. I want to steal her from this party and show her what she means to me.
But I can’t because she’s not interested in me. She never has been. At least not in the way I want her to be.
Which is why I offered to help, because I want to see her happy.
She deserves to be happy.
If only her happiness didn’t depend on me revealing a big secret—the masked kisser was here.
Meredith
The sun was peeking out over the horizon by the time Dimitri and I had filled the last trash bag and tossed it into the pile with the others. We’ve spent the last hour in complete silence, and I’m grateful for it.
The party was a hit, especially for Alli, but it was a big let down for me.
I swallow hard, trying to ignore the way my heart has been aching since it realized the masked kisser was not going to show.
It was sometime after two in the morning when I looked around the room and became aware the party had all but ended. Gone was the crowd of people and the noise. Empty were the snacks bowls and various bottles of alcohol. I’d been standing against the wall for nearly three hours like some kind of loser, waiting for what would never happen—and I felt completely stupid for it.
Dimitri crossed the room, sensing my defeat, but before he could open his mouth, I held up a hand to stop him. “I don’t want to talk about it,” I said, and surprisingly he listened.
I didn’t want to think about it either, so I busied myself with clean up. I turned off the music, called a cab for the remaining guests and began filling trash bags.
Dimitri watched me for a few moments before he grabbed his own bag to help me when it was clear I wasn’t going to let myself wallow.
Alli had snuck off to bed with her football player long before the party ended, so she had no idea what was going on and probably wouldn’t rouse until the afternoon.
But now, hours later, the apartment is cleaner than it was before the party started and I have nothing left to keep the thoughts from coming.
And they come in full force.
You waited for hours.
You missed the entire party.
He didn’t come.
I desperately blink back the burn of a thousand tears threatening to spill over and beeline to my bedroom, locking the door the moment it clicks closed. I ignore the knock on the door, knowing it’s Dimitri and not wanting to see the pity in his eyes.
I refuse to cry, to let loose the disappointment, but I can’t stay strong in front of an audience at the moment. I need a moment or two to myself, just long enough to clear my head and come to terms with the outcome, because I knew this could easily be one of the possibilities. And even though I’d tried to ready my heart for it, I wasn’t prepared.
“Mere, please let me in.” Dimitri knocks again, this time using his voice to call out to me. I hear the concern and care, but I don’t want it. I want to be left alone so I can sort through my thoughts.
“Not right now Dimitri, please,” I say softly, finding my voice.
“Please Mere, I need to talk to you,” he insists, and this time I hear a desperation in the deep gravel of his words. I wal
k to the door, unlock it and open it a crack.
“I’m all right,” I sigh, but he pushes open the door, causing me to step back and gawk at him as he crosses the threshold. He rakes a hand through his hair and down the stubble on his face. The sleeves of the crisp white shirt he has on are rolled to his elbows, and the top two buttons hang open. When he turns to finally look at me, it’s not pity I see in his eyes—it’s fear and uncertainty. “I’m fine. Mostly relieved, actually.”
“You are?” He frowns and places one hand on his hip and the other hand tugs at his hair. It’s a familiar action, one I’ve seen many times when something weighs heavily on his mind. I can almost hear the wheels turning in his head as he tries to sort through his thoughts.
“Yeah.” I nod. “Is that weird?”
“No, I guess not.”
“It was like he had me under some kind of spell, and tonight it finally wore off.” I shrug. “It sucks but maybe not knowing is for the best. I can move on now, like you said. But I got one good thing out of it all.”
“What’s that?”
“He made damn sure I knew what a good kiss should feel like.” I laugh softly and give him a little smile. It’s true, my mystery kisser did give me that out of the whole deal.
“Hmm,” he grunts, narrowing his eyes on me like he’s thinking hard and carefully about what he wants to say next. It’s almost like he has a secret he wants to spill but doesn’t know how to do it. “Mere, what if I told you he was here?”
A shiver runs down my spine but I can’t move as our eyes are lock together. My heart skips a beat at the thought, but I quickly push it aside and shake my head.
“He wasn’t—”
“No, I mean right now, standing in front of you,” he cuts me off, sounding desperate to get the words out.
“I don’t understand,” I stammer as the energy in the room shifts and my body goes into high alert. I study him, becoming more aware of him now than ever before. “Please don’t make this a joke.”
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