‘The head teacher gave me the afternoon off.’
‘Your mother let you finish early?’
‘Mother?’ Niall sniggers. ‘Mrs Sullivan’s your mother?’ He bursts into laughter. ‘Oh my, where’s Jeremy Beadle, seriously, cos all of this has to be someone’s idea of a sick joke.’
I take note of the fact there are two cans of beer on the coffee table.
‘So did you start drinking before or after the fight?’
‘He punched me the minute he opened the door,’ says Seb, looking at me like a wounded puppy. ‘Didn’t even give me a chance to speak.’
‘Yeah, well mate. Last time I saw you, was on a photo kissing my wife, what’d you expect?’
‘I’ve explained that now. I have no interest in your wife whatsoever.’
I feel a bit insulted but realise it’s best to keep my mouth closed on this one. ‘So you finally believe me?’ I state.
‘Yes, well, with all this Monique business, I was already thinking you’d probably been set up, but I was still wondering what he was doing at the house. He’s explained it all now, and it’s sorted.’ He turns to Seb. ‘Do you fancy another beer, mate?’
‘No thanks, I need to be able to drive home.’
‘Good point. I’ll just shift these tins or she’ll be moaning.’
Whilst he pops into the kitchen I look at Seb and he winks at me with his good eye.
Niall comes back with a cloth and wipes the table down. However, not to make me completely think he’s been abducted by aliens, he leaves the cloth on the table and sits back down. ‘So, er, you got a lady then, Seb?’
‘There was someone, but they didn’t feel the same way about me, so I’m planning on going Down Under for a while.’
I have to cough to cover a snort and then I replay back what he’s said and I feel sad. I’ve used this guy and deserted him, so beach life should suit him well.
‘We’ve talked about going to Australia in the past,’ says Niall. ‘I can go with work over there through being a nurse. I guess that’s the same with you, are they crying out for teachers?’
‘Yes. Are you considering it then, in light of what’s happened?’ Seb asks Niall.
They both look towards me and I feel uncomfortable under their gazes, and unsure as to whom I should look at.
I turn towards Seb. ‘No, though I am asking Niall to consider a move. I’d like to go to Staffordshire to be nearer his parents. I think it would be nice for Joe.’
‘Sounds sensible to me,’ says Seb, looking at Niall. ‘I do think a fresh start away from this madness is what you need.’
‘Well we still need to talk about it, but it’s definitely a possibility.’ Niall looks at me and gives me a look and a half smile that for the first time in a long time, gives me hope again for us.
‘Right, well I’d better be off then,’ says Seb. ‘I’ll leave you to it. Good luck with the police later. I’ll be around until a week on Saturday if they need me for statements or anything.’
‘Thanks, I’ll show you out,’ I say.
He stands up and shakes Niall’s unbruised hand. ‘See you mate, take care of this lady, she’s a good one.’
‘I know, that’s why I married her.’ I hear the Neanderthal coming out of Niall, so head Seb towards the door quickly.
As he stands in the doorway he turns towards me and I get the full melting chocolate brown eyes. ‘Here,’ he says, and hands me a piece of paper, taking time to stroke my hand as he leaves it in my grasp. My hand tingles.
‘What is it?’ I whisper.
‘My address in Australia. I’ll be there for a couple of months. If it doesn’t work out with Niall, you know where to find me. I’m not saying goodbye Lauren.’ With that he walks away and I know that although there’s a chance I’ll bump into him at school, it’s possible that this will be the last time I’ll ever see him. I close the door on him and on that part of my life. I tear the paper into tiny pieces which I place into my pocket, knowing that even if I put it all together again, a piece would always be missing.
I walk back into the lounge and into Niall’s embrace. He covers me with his arms like my warm duvet. I hope this episode in our lives has passed and we can go on to the next. Anyone who thinks a marriage is always love and flowers is fooling themselves. Marriage is hard work. Sometimes you travel on different paths as you grow, but if you’re lucky enough, those paths reunite and the journey is good again. I hope that Niall and I will get through this, as in all these years it’s not been our first bump in the road, although it’s proving to be the largest to date. I sink into his hug and feel relief overwhelm me.
‘So what do we do now?’ asks Niall.
‘We wait.’
Bettina arrives just after two. The day has turned pleasant, so we sit in the garden on my bench. Niall brings out a fold up chair so he can sit with us. We sit expectantly, there are no pleasantries exchanged, we just want to try and get to the bottom of the situation.
‘Well it took me to say Tyler may be in danger, but once he got that, it all came out. I think I’m going to need some more therapy after this.’
‘Won’t we all,’ says Niall.
‘Danny says he met Monique when I was pregnant with Tyler.’ She sits stony faced. ‘So he was probably never faithful to me at all.’
‘I’m sorry, Bettina.’
She shrugs. ‘I got over Danny Southwell a long time ago. Anyway, they had, by all accounts, a torrid affair, for about a year. She wanted to get serious and asked him to leave me, and of course he said no. He told her she wasn’t his only lover and he didn’t need another wife because he already had one.
‘What a charming man. Why on earth did you stay with him so long?’ asks Niall.
‘You do what you can for your kids. I thought Tyler needed his dad.’
Niall nods.
‘She threatened to tell me everything apparently. Danny told her to go ahead because I knew anyway, and that there was no way he’d leave, he had his son to think about. She gave him a load of hassle, saying that kids always got in the way of things and she was sick of it.’
‘Hang on a minute,’ I say. ‘This is like, nine or ten years ago?’
‘So?’
‘That’s around the time her husband left her because he wanted kids. Looks like it became a pattern for her; rejected for children again.’
Apparently she sent him poison pen letters, turned up at bars he was in. He had to threaten her with the police. She said he’d come around eventually and she could wait.’ He just put it down to her being another possessive bimbo. He’s met quite a few over the years.’
‘So has he any idea why she came to Sheffield? That was five years before you arrived. She couldn’t possibly have known you’d move here.’
‘No. That he has no idea about. He fails to see the connection with you, other than he believes he probably discussed my ‘obsession’ with you.’
‘I don’t get you,’ says Niall.
‘It was one of his "my wife doesn’t understand me" lines. I had issues with Lauren over school. He’d tell his girlfriends I was obsessed with a former school friend, made out I made his life hell. Sound familiar?’
‘That’s what he told me,’ I say.
‘Yes, well that’s the only connection to you that was made, so we have to assume that she befriended you to get at me.’
‘That makes no sense. We weren’t in touch.’
‘Well, I don’t have any other ideas.’
‘At least we know what set her off now.’ I’m still in total shock that my mate has turned into a crazy lady. ‘I think it’s time to ring the police.’
The police take the phone, the photos and brief statements from us. They say they’ll need to talk to us again later, but for now they just intend to pick her up. They call to say she’s not at the apartment, but they’ll keep checking in until she appears. We go to collect the kids from school, aware that for now it’
s just a waiting game.
The kids are full of it as they come out. ‘I’ve had a great day mum,’ Joe squeals. ‘We had a class treat and watched a video.’
‘Remind me to retrain as a teacher,’ I tell Joe. ‘Cos that sounds like fun.’
We walk down the drive together and say goodbye at the bottom. Bettina and Tyler walk off in the opposite direction. As the weather’s nice we walked to school to pick up the kids, so I look forward to a nice stroll home with my son. What I’m not expecting is for my path to cross with that of Dr Love.
‘What the hell?’
‘I need to speak to you.’
I turn to Joe. ‘Mum won’t be a minute, Hun. Just wait here whilst I talk to Matt.’
‘Who are you?’ Joe asks him bluntly.
‘Its Auntie Mon’s boyfriend, Joe, don’t be rude.’
Joe stands at my side looking up the street and fidgeting. It’s impossible for him to keep still. I smile and then turn back to Matt.
I speak in hushed tones. ‘We’ve called the police, so they’ll be looking for you in connection with the crash into our car.’
His face turns grim. ‘It’s my word against your husband’s. I’ve got a witness, and anyway, I’m a doctor.’
‘Yes, but you’re linked with Monique, whose turned fifteen shades of crazy, so maybe your statement won’t hold as much clout as you think.’
Joe tugs my arm. ‘Mum, mum.’
‘Just a minute, Joe.’ People are bustling around us in their quest to get home from school as quickly as possible. This is not the best place to hold a conversation but I need to find out as much as I can from this man.
‘Why did she ask you to crash into his car?’
‘I’m not going into that with you.’
‘So why are you here? Why bother coming all the way here? You must have had some reason?’
He smirks and gets in the car that has pulled alongside us. It hares off down the street.
I turn around to tell Joe that we need to get home, but he’s not there. He’s gone from my side whilst I was distracted by Dr Love. I realise the words out of Joe’s mouth weren’t ‘Mum, Mum,’ they were ‘Mon, Mon.’
My legs give way and a scream leaves my body at a noise level and with a strength I didn’t know I had.
Someone calls the police. It’s all a blur. My voice screams for Joe, and then as much as I try and fight it, knowing I need to keep on top of things for Joe, it all goes dark.
I come round in Mrs Sullivan’s office, laid on the floor with my head on a jacket and my heels perched on the edge of a child’s chair. I’m told Niall is on his way. A policewoman is sitting in the corner and I realise there is someone to the right of me, a paramedic. ‘Okay Mrs Lawler, stay where you are a moment.”
I ignore him and sit up. I go dizzy and feel faint again. What sort of mother am I? My child needs me and I can’t help for fainting.
‘I’ll make her a cup of sweet tea,’ says Mrs Sullivan, ‘and get her a biscuit.’
My son is missing and they think I have time to drink tea and eat biscuits? Yet I know that if I don’t take this time I’ll be of no use to anyone. A trickle of water slides down my face. Niall, who has now arrived and been briefed, looks at me with concern.
‘The police are looking for them, but can you remember the number plate or make of the car?’
‘No,’ I sob. ‘It wasn’t Monique’s car.’ I curl up in a foetal position. ‘I only know it was dark blue. What the hell use am I? I don’t even know the make of it.’
‘Stop it, Lauren.’
‘I let her take my child.’
‘Before you fainted, you told the people with you that Dr Bailey deliberately distracted you. Is that true?’ The policewoman moves over toward me.
‘Yes.’ My eyes open wide. ‘She hates children, what does she want with Joe? What if she harms him? Oh God I can’t bear it.’
She places a hand on my shoulder. ‘They won’t be far. We’ve all the local airports and other travel stations covered.’
A fresh wave of horror washes over me. I never thought she might take him away somewhere. ‘Joe, Joe, Joe.’ I sit up and rock back and forth. ‘My baby, my baby.’ I stand up and a burst of adrenaline shoots through me. ‘I’ll fucking kill her.’
The policewoman guides me back to a seat. ‘You need to calm down Mrs Lawler.’ She hands me my tea. I take a sip and wince as it burns my tongue. It’s sweet and disgusting. The policewoman urges me to take another sip. ‘It’s what you need right now. We need you to calm down so that we can ask you some questions. Now don’t worry about the make of the car. There were other witnesses around who recognised it as a Mazda three, so that’s one further detail we have to go on. It’s not Dr Bailey’s car, so we’re currently looking into car rental places to see if we can get a positive ID that way.’
Of course, I’m the key witness and so far I’ve been no use to anybody, least of all Joe. I take a few deep breaths and sip the tea slowly. I ask for a biscuit and force it down. After a few minutes and two biscuits I feel calmer. ‘Okay, ask away.’
I recall the conversation with Dr Bailey and how he’d obviously been there to distract me whilst Monique got Joe in the car. I told them how I’d just thought Joe was being his usual annoying ‘mum, mum, mum’ self, and I have to bite my tongue, deliberately hurting myself until I taste blood, in order to stop from falling apart again. ‘He was saying Mon, Niall,’ I say, looking up at him and seeing my pain reflected in his face. ‘I wasn’t listening properly. I’m a hopeless mother.’
Niall comes over and gets down on his knees so he’s looking me in the eyes. His eyes flash with anger. ‘You are not a hopeless mother. Our son has wanted for nothing. But now is not about your ability as a mother Lauren. It’s not about you and it’s not about your past. It’s about now and Joe and I need you to get yourself out of this funk and into a place where you can help get our son back. Do you understand what I’m saying, Lauren?’
I feel like I’ve been slapped in the face, but in a good way, if that’s possible. As if I was sleepwalking, about to go off a cliff edge and the slap was to wake me up and bring me back from danger.
‘You’re right. I’ve got my mobile on me. We need to go looking for Joe ourselves.’
The policewoman starts to shake her head. ‘Leave it to us, we’ve everything covered. Why don’t you take her home, Mr Lawler?’
‘I’m not sitting around whilst that cow has my son somewhere.’ I snap. ‘You have my number if there are developments.’ I get up from my chair, feeling stronger now that I have a purpose. ‘Niall, let’s go, we need to find our son.’
He walks with me towards the door.
‘I’ll call you later, Lauren, and see how you’re getting on,’ says Mrs Sullivan. ‘You know we’re here for you if you need anything.’
‘Thank you,’ I tell her, and leave the school.
We sit in Niall’s car thinking about what we should do next. ‘What if she goes for Tyler next?’
Bettina turns hysterical when we tell her and then catapults into me, holding me in her arms. ‘Oh God, Lauren, I’ll help anyway I can. I feel responsible for getting you involved in all this.’
I stiffen.
‘There’s no reason behind this, she’s a nutter,’ says Niall. ‘Anyway, you may need to think about getting some protection from the police until she’s caught.
‘I’m going to drop Tyler off with my mum,’ she says. With the police there, they’ll be safe. I feel partly responsible for her behaviour. So, no arguing, but what’s the plan?
‘We’re going to look anywhere we can think of, where she might take him.’ I say.
‘Well, I’m coming with you, let’s go.’
Chapter 22
I wait at Bettina’s while Niall takes her to her mother’s to drop Tyler off. I pace around the house wondering why I didn’t go with them rather than hanging around here, but it had been agreed they would ret
urn to the house so we could think of the best way to approach things. I just want to be out there looking for my kid. I’m surprised the police haven’t called with any updates, and then I remember, of course, my mobile. I try and call Monique’s home number, but it just goes to the machine. I leave a message.
‘Mon, it’s me. I don’t know why you’ve taken Joe. Please don’t hurt him and please ring me. I thought we were friends.’ I don’t know what else to say and feel my voice breaking on the words so I hang up. I open the keypad and text the same message to her mobile. I sit on my knees next to the window ledge and pray that she’ll make contact and bring me back my son.
Niall and Bettina return within twenty-five minutes. He looks at me hopefully and I watch his face drop as I have nothing to offer him.
‘I’ve called and texted,’ I state. ‘Nothing yet.’
‘We need to come up with a list of places she might have taken him,’ says Niall. ‘She’s obviously not stupid enough to go back home.’
We sit and think and come up with the following:
Coffee shop
Gym
Supermarket
Toy shops.
‘It’s a start,’ says Niall. ‘Let’s go.’
We spend a few hours trailing around all the places we can think of, but find nothing. It’s early evening and though still light, it’s beginning to fade. It strikes me that I might have to spend the whole evening without my son. From there I start to think what if I never get him back, never see him again?
‘I think for now we need to go back home,’ says Niall. ‘We’ll leave it to the police and try again tomorrow morning.’
‘We can’t give up Niall. We have to keep looking.’
‘We need rest and some food. Remember what you’re always saying to Joe? A car can’t run without petrol? Well you need to take your own advice. We’ll go home, get some food and rest, and then we’ll take it from there, okay? If we think of anywhere else to look tonight, I promise, I’ll be the first one out of the door.’
My shoulders slump and I sit back in the front seat of the car, my eyes scan the road all the way back to Bettina’s mother’s house.
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