Water Viper: A Jesse Alexander Novel

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Water Viper: A Jesse Alexander Novel Page 12

by RJ Blain


  “Gentry, did your wife bite you in the face again?” Todd came to a halt just outside of his rival guild leader’s reach. “Gotta watch yourself around women, the most dangerous of all species.”

  “Women are a gender, not a species, Todd,” I hissed under my breath.

  Todd jabbed me with his elbow.

  “What do you want, Jacobson?”

  Todd breathed in, smirked, and exhaled. “Ah. Is your wife expecting? That would explain it. You must have had quite the evening if she mauled you that badly while you were mating.”

  I lifted my free hand and pinched the tiny blood vessels between my tear ducts and nose, testing the theory it was possible to induce unconsciousness with enough effort. It didn’t work.

  Damn it.

  “I’m hoping for triplets. How about you? How many of your mares are going to be left high and dry this year?”

  A deathly silence swept over the gathering, but instead of taking insult, Todd laughed. “None, if you must know.”

  “Even the little high-priced whore dangling off your arm? Bet your mares aren’t happy you decided to take such a young slut as your so-called lady.”

  Todd angered me often but not to the same level of fury Gentry incited. “Can I kill him just a little, Todd?” I whispered.

  “How do you kill someone just a little?”

  “I could show you.” I rolled my shoulders and adjusted my stance, ready to kick off my shoes and get to work. “You told me this was going to end in a brawl anyway with so many rival species. I’d just be starting the party a little early.”

  “You’ve been here less than five minutes. How could you possibly want to start killing someone already?”

  “Do you even know what the words whore and slut mean?”

  “Stallion,” Todd reminded me.

  Gentry Adams looked me over head to toe, then his gaze focused on my face. He blinked.

  Well aware of every other person in the room giving me the same treatment, I put my hand on my katana, canted my head to the side, and forced my expression to cold neutrality.

  Dawnfire’s guild master sucked in a breath. “Oh.”

  What was that supposed to mean? I allowed myself a frown.

  Todd patted my arm and released me, taking one step to the side. “It’s a free country, m’dear. If you want to try to kill him just a little, be my guest. If you have it in your heart, I would rather like that headdress. It’s nice. I’d look prettier in it than him.”

  A few tittering laughs swept through the crowd, and those nearby backed away, clearing space. Dawnfire’s guild master grunted, his hand dropping to his sword, a blade with at least a foot’s length on my katana. “You don’t want to do this.”

  I did. I did so much it hurt. If Todd wanted a headdress—Gentry’s feathered monstrosity—I’d be happy to test out my katana on one of Charlotte’s most dangerous men. What was a party without a little bit of spark and life to it?

  I’d already walked into the lion’s den. It wasn’t like anything else could go wrong. With so much anger to work out, a good, strong opponent like Gentry would keep me on my toes. I’d never tested my skills against someone as good, and if I managed to take the man’s headdress, Todd’s rank as a herd stallion and as a guild master would rise for the duration of the banquet.

  “What species are you, anyway?” I asked, keeping my body relaxed while watching my opponent.

  Excitement shivered through me, heated my blood, and made me lick my lips in anticipation.

  “Grizzly.”

  Well, shit. His standing as the top dog of Dawnfire made a lot more sense. No one wanted a fight with a grizzly, except me, apparently.

  Gentry Adams chuckled, a low, deep, rumbling sound in his chest. “How about you? Should I call you a slut, whore, or mare? You don’t look like a lady to me.”

  I hopped, whipped my leg, and kicked off my heel. It smacked Gentry right between the eyes, and a moment later, my second one joined the first, connecting with his forehead. I landed, stepped out of his reach, and drew my katana. “Meow, teddy bear.”

  Chapter Twelve

  I carried far more potent weapons than shoes, but striking Dawnfire’s guild master twice without facing retaliation won me the first round.

  I’d count myself lucky if I lived long enough to brag to someone—anyone—I’d landed a blow on a grizzly bear. If he got his hands on me, I’d die. It was probably a matter of when, unless Gentry remembered he’d accepted a pricy bounty for my living, uninjured head.

  Unlikely.

  The infuriated roar of the grizzly bear shook the mayoral palace, and like Todd, he shifted fast and without any evidence it bothered him. His clothing ripped, and shredded fabric rained to the polished floor. The headdress remained in place, a crown on the beast’s great, snarling head.

  “Todd? This is your fault. I hate you, and you suck.”

  The gathered shifters and mystics burst into laughter and kept it up until the grizzly bear stood on his hind legs and let out another ground-shaking roar. Humor wouldn’t save my ass; nothing would.

  “Stop whining. It’s just a little ol’ grizzly. He wants to give you a hug.”

  I stared at Gentry’s massive claws, imagining what they’d do to me, my dress, and anything else they came into contact with. I hopped back a few steps, and the bear grunted, dropping down to all four paws. “A hug. Right. I’m not responsible for the cleanup bill or damages.”

  “Yes, yes. That, unfortunately, is my problem, as I assumed you’d be a sane, nice, quiet, and obedient little escort.” Todd’s sigh gusted out of him, and he rubbed his brow, shaking his head in an obvious show of regret.

  I stopped in my tracks and stared at the stallion. “Are you crazy?”

  “Why are you looking at me when there’s a grizzly stalking you?”

  I was aware of Gentry’s slow, lethal approach, but I waited until he came close enough he could swat me across the room. Fur and muscle rippled, the grizzly’s posture changed, and he lunged for me.

  Of all the asinine, insane stunts I’d pulled in the past month, jumping onto a grizzly’s back topped the list. I dug my toes into his fur, one foot braced on his shoulder while the other rested across his arched back. “What, you mean this little ol’ teddy bear?”

  “You’re standing on Dawnfire’s guild master.”

  Gentry didn’t move, though he made a worrying chuffing sound. “He’s surprisingly soft. There was nothing in the rules stating I couldn’t stand on anyone. No killing. You’re not dead, are you, you fuzzy little teddy bear?”

  I decided the grunt meant he was very much alive and probably daydreaming about various ways to kill me or throw me off without killing me, since killing me was against the rules.

  Hurting me would murder his guild’s reputation, and we both knew it. I remembered his moment of recognition.

  “Lucky me. I got to ride two Charlotte legends today.” I leaned over and relieved Gentry of his headdress before launching off his shoulder. My bare feet slapped on the floor, and I strolled my way to Todd, holding out the feathered monstrosity. “This is a crime against fashion. I was doing him a favor. Instead of wearing it, you should destroy it.”

  Gentry rose up to his hind legs again, roaring so long and loud I flinched and covered my ears. “Okay, that hurts a little.”

  The sound died away, and Todd shot me a venomous look. “A little?”

  “I’m not fighting a grizzly! If he wants to shift back and pick up his sword…” The instant the words left my mouth, I realized what I said, and my face turned red. Silence hung over the entire room. Someone, far enough away I could barely hear them, snorted on a laugh. Several giggles answered, and then the entire room lost all semblance of control, their mirth cresting until not even the grizzly’s bellowing roar could surpass it.

  Gentry hung his head, huffing.

  Todd snickered. “You heard her, Adams. Seems like she got to ride us both tonight, but she’d prefer if you’d handle your s
word while human.”

  A tiny woman, who wouldn’t even reach five feet if she stood on her toes, slipped through the crowd, stepping into the circle of space containing me, Todd, and one angry grizzly. Like me, she wore a dress worthy of the palace, and the crimson gown brought out the red in her hair and the fire in her eyes. “Gentry Jones Adams, what have you been doing? I thought we specifically agreed there would be no playing with your sword at the banquet. Yet here we are.”

  The grizzly bear rolled onto his back and batted the air with his paws, making a sound suspiciously like a whine.

  My mouth dropped open, and a strangled noise emerged from my throat.

  The woman’s attention turned to me. “You don’t smell like you were riding Todd or anyone else for that matter.”

  My face heated as the shifters around me sniffed to verify the woman’s claim. Was nothing sacred to shifters? Probably not. I took a lot of precautions to cover or erase my scent during a job as the Water Viper, but I always misjudged their regard for the privacy of others, especially when it came to mating.

  “Oh, she rode me all right, all the way from my estate. She’s light as a feather, too, and has really soft hands.”

  Every single person in the room stared at Todd, and he postured, holding Gentry’s headdress in his hand. The woman’s eyes widened, and she looked between me and Todd before turning to the crowd, her gaze settling on Marie. “Lady Jacobson?”

  “He didn’t even buck her off, not even once. He did forget himself and rear, but only because one of those guards outside refused to acknowledge him. He was rather offended.” Like Todd, Marie’s satisfaction showed on her face. “She’s quite good bareback.”

  Another wave of laughter swept over the crowd, and the tension that had driven me to challenge one of the best—if not the best—warrior in the city flowed out of me. I blinked, swaying as my legs forgot what they were supposed to do.

  Todd cursed, grabbing hold of my arm, which kept me from sliding into a dress-covered puddle on the floor. “I keep forgetting you are not accustomed to large gatherings of shifters.”

  I shook my head, stiffened my legs, and forced myself to stand straight. “I got his headdress.”

  “You certainly did. Go give it back now that everyone is no longer ready to rip out each others’ throats.”

  I took the headdress, which was surprisingly heavy, and regarded Gentry Adams with a frown. The grizzly rolled to his paws, leaning against the tiny woman, who clucked her tongue and patted him on the head. I turned to Todd, my eyes wide. “Who is she?”

  “Lady Adams. She’s a wolverine, and the unofficial co-leader of Dawnfire. Seems people are so frightened of her Adams can’t keep her in the chain of command. Makes sense, as wolverines are about the only damned thing tough enough to take on a grizzly and come out on top.”

  “Or a cottontail,” I muttered.

  Todd laughed. “Well, the First Gentleman is an exception to the rule. Little bastard likes going straight for the throat.”

  “Why didn’t he rip my head off?” I shifted my weight foot to foot, my gaze settling on the wolverine and grizzly. Lady Adams scratched under her mate’s chin, and if the guild master relaxed any further, someone would have to scrape him out from between the marble slabs.

  “The no killing rule did have something to do with it.” Leaning closer to me, the stallion whispered in my ear, “He picked a fight with you to help establish banquet hierarchy. By targeting you, who is with me, he’s claimed I’m a worthy opponent. By not claiming blood despite the insult and landing the first blow, you have demonstrated your worth. You didn’t draw your sword, which showed your respect for the hosts of the banquet. By giving his headdress back, you indicate your willingness to ignore the insult for the sake of the gathering.”

  “Isn’t that just wonderful,” I muttered. Lifting my chin, I marched over to Gentry, aware of the many pairs of eyes following my every movement. Lady Adams straightened and regarded me with the same distaste I reserved for centipedes and other creepy-crawlies with too many legs. Todd’s explanation made sense in a twisted sort of way, but if he thought I was just going to let go being called a slut or whore, he was mistaken.

  I held out the headdress. “If you disrespect me, disrespect Todd, or disrespect any of his herd or guild again, I will hunt you down, quench my sword in your heart, and hang you from the highest tower by your entrails. Behave as a beast, and you will die as one.”

  No one moved, and when I grew tired of holding out the feathered monstrosity, I tossed it onto the grizzly’s stomach, gathered my shoes, and returned to Todd’s side.

  “That was a little much.”

  “Then he shouldn’t have called me a slut or a whore.”

  “I’ll never understand species who mate for life. So restrained.”

  “Keep talking, Todd. You can join him.”

  “You’re in a fine temper today.”

  I shrugged. “If you wanted a lady, you should have brought a lady. You brought a mercenary, so that’s what you got. You made the bed, so sleep in it.”

  “Join me?”

  I drew my katana. A huge pair of clawed paws wrapped around me from behind, pinning my arms to my side. Lady Adams forced my blade back into its sheath. I strained against the grizzly’s hold. “Damn it, Todd!”

  The stallion laughed. “You’re so much fun when you’re angry.”

  It took an hour, several stiff drinks, and a walk outside to cool my temper. Todd and Cleo accompanied me, and while I bristled at their presence, I understood the necessity. An enterprising bounty hunter would take advantage of any chance I gave them, but few would try a hit with a guild master around to witness it.

  I really wanted a beer, but the powers that be favored wine, champagne, and cocktails. The bright-colored drinks packed a punch, making up for their sickening sweetness.

  “Think you can play nice with others now?”

  The amusement in Todd’s tone annoyed me, but I inhaled, closed my eyes, and nodded when my lungs ached from the need for breath. I exhaled long and slow. “Sorry.”

  “By the time this week is over, every single one of us will need take a walk for some fresh air and be restrained to keep from tearing someone a new asshole. It’s an ideal situation right now. If Gentry and I can walk away without bloodshed, then the other guests have no excuse for excessive violence. Hopefully, they’ll take the hint from your theft of his headdress to keep their contests bloodless. Unfortunately, I expect there’ll be bloodshed soon enough.”

  “I fucked up. I’m supposed to be a bodyguard.”

  “You’re supposed to be anything required. You’re fine.” Todd gave my shoulder a solid thump, pushing me in the direction of the main hall. “You’re going to be a more effective bodyguard now, too, because you’ve demonstrated you’re capable of handling yourself even against someone like Adams. Stop worrying so much.”

  “He’s right, Jesse. You know full well shifters value courage, and you’ve proven you’ve got yourself a pair of brass balls facing off against a cranky grizzly like you did. If anyone does figure out you’re the bounty target, they’ll be thinking twice about trying to collect, and they’ll think you might be worth every penny of it, too. The ones who know how to fight will recognize you’re no pushover thanks to your little dance with Adams. The ones who already know you will be thinking long and hard about what you’ve been doing the past six months to return to Charlotte with such a fine blade. You have the high ground for now.”

  “Bodyguards are supposed to be in the background, not out in front as the main show,” I muttered, shaking my head.

  Todd kept shoving me along until I walked of my own free will. “Roll with the punches. Let’s get back to the main hall. Grab a bite or two to eat before you get drunk. When Adams comes over and starts some small talk, smile, be polite, and keep your sword sheathed. It’s all part of the game.”

  “This game sucks. He’s going to talk to me?”

  “I’m sure
he’s curious why you’re suddenly worth a fortune.”

  “Shit. Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit.”

  Why had I returned to Charlotte? What had possessed me to accept the job from Todd? Why had I thought there was a chance I could get away with dodging such a large bounty? My stupidity knew no bounds, and I swore if I made it through the banquet alive and free, I’d run so far underground I’d become nothing more than an unsolved mystery, a myth among mercs.

  We returned to the large room, and faint music accompanied the incessant murmur of conversation. No one seemed to notice our return, and Todd guided me to one of the long banquet tables pressed against the walls, which kept most of the large room’s space for guests to mingle.

  My stomach churned at being among so many people; a hundred or more bodies pressed together, a bodyguard’s nightmare. I searched the crowd for any sign of someone who might be like me, an assassin with a hidden needle capable of poisoning a mark and slipping away without anyone being the wiser for it.

  Without knowing who else was on hire to guard the guests, I couldn’t even check in with any of them; if I had been given time to think and prepare, I could have hunted down some mystic-powered radios to make monitoring the gathering feasible. I’d have to tan strips off Cleo’s hide for preventing me from being ready.

  Then again, even if given months to prepare, I doubted I’d ever consider myself ready for everything the banquet entailed. Under normal circumstances, the bodyguards hired for the event would come from the same guild—Todd’s—with trusted freelancers like me filling in the blank spaces. I turned to the stallion, my mouth open to ask who was in charge, when a blur of color caught my attention.

  In a room where everyone moved at a slow, relaxed pace, the haste of the motion alerted me to trouble. I yanked the katana out of its sheath, the metal ringing, and tightened my hand on the braided grip.

  The silver of steel flashed, and I took a single step forward, my eyes tracing the spinning arc of a throwing dagger aimed for Todd’s back. Steel rang on steel, and the projectile clattered to the floor and slid beneath the food-laden table rather than slamming home in the stallion.

 

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