by J. C. Burke
Rosie, one of the counsellors from the family rehab support group back home, taught me that in a kid's session. She called it 'blowing out the black stuff '.
So that's what I did. I blew out the 'black stuff ' and went back to writing the 'good stuff'.
Okay, so here are some detailzzzzz . . .
I'm in the Starfish Bungalow. It's soooo nice. The whole camp is like a Bali resort. There are 4 of us in the Starfish Bungalow.
Kia, who needs no introduction, doesn't seem that interested in me even though we've known about each other forever. But like I said, I'm NOT going to write about those bits. Maybe it'll get better with her but I'm not keeping up my hopes.
Georgie, Kia's best friend, is also in here. She's really nice. It got a bit awkward tonight when Kia was being unfriendly and Georgie had a go at her. Stop, stop, stop, stop – gooooooooood stuff only!!
Kia had pushed Georgie's and her bed together and it looked like she'd moved Ace's a bit closer too. So I was sin-binned over the other side of the room. I was feeling like the fish part of 'starfish', and they were the stars. Now I understood it was all part of Kia's plan.
But tonight Georgie was so nice to me. Kia was acting like a total desperate, squealing and jumping around every time Ace got a message from her boyfriend. She was acting like her and Ace were instant best friends and that made me feel like even more of a reject.
Georgie came over and sat at the end of my bed. 'Sorry,' she whispered to me. 'Kia can get a bit excitable and she looooves Tim Parker.' She rolled her eyes. 'It's going to be a long three weeks.'
Of course I smiled, pretending none of it bothered me and hoping that Georgie had come over because she wanted to, not because she felt sorry for me. We chatted and chatted, especially about the grading session, which I was totally and completely stoked about and which was probably the only thing that got me through overhearing Kia and Reg's conversation.
I needed to record that bit in words so that I would never ever forget how good it felt.
THIS BIT IS GOOD. NO THIS BIT IS
AMAAAAAAAAZING . . . I got graded in the SAME GROUP as Courtney McFarlane (or Ace as everyone calls her, except me coz I'm too scared to). I nearly died when they read out my name.
Courtney McFarlane, yes THE Courtney McFarlane!!! She is in our room to o. OMG, I nearly died when I heard she was coming to camp AND allocated to the same bungalow. When she walked in, we all stopped and stared coz she is soooo pretty. I've only said about 3 words to her – SCARY!
I'm gonna start at the beginning . . .
LUNCHTIME: I found out the grading session was with the girls from our bungalows. I full-on started freaking out about surfing with Ace let alone being graded with her. So, I to ok a walk in the garden to calm my nerves but that turned out to be a dumb idea!
But when I feel bad and down, that's often when I surf my best coz it gives me something to focus on, takes me outta my head. Anyway it must've worked coz I got graded into the SAME GROUP as ACE! I was so supa supa supa x 100000000000 stoked. All of us Starfish girls got put in the same group so I guess we'll be seeing a lot of each other.
AFTER LUNCH BUT BEFORE THE GRADING: We had the 'meet the staff' session.
Carla's the director. She calls herself the camp mum. She used to be a sports mistress at a private girls school in Sydney but she doesn't seem strict or snobby. She's pretty nice.
There are 3 surfing coaches. Shyan, Taylor and Jake. Shyan's from Hawaii. She's coaching the T2's. Taylor was in the women's WQS in 2004 and 2005 but had to retire coz she got injured surfing Cloudbreak. She's taking the T3's. We're the T1's but our instructor Jake reckons he's just gonna call us the Starfish Sisters!
Jake's supa nice. He was teasing Kia about being a wooz and wearing a steamer in the middle of summer. So Georgie told him how they made bikinis and how Kia was meant to be modelling them but chickened out. So then Jake started saying he was going to have a compulsory bikini surfing session, but then Georgie started freaking out coz she calls her legs tree trunks and then Ace, who had been wearing a rash vest and boardies, disappeared then returned wearing the tiniest bikini that her boyfriend gave her from Brazil. The bottoms were almost like a G-string. I promise. Then Jake said that she had to get changed coz if someone from OP turned up and she wasn't wearing one of their cossies he'd get into trouble. I heard Ace whisper to Kia, 'He's just worried he's gonna get a stiffy.' Yuck! That's so off!
Tomorrow we're having a video analysis of the grading session. Georgie was on dinner prep duty when Megan, one of the older girls from Tasmania, told us 'Jake might seem nice but they say he's harsh when it comes to the video analysis.' Ace said, 'He'll slam Georgie's performance coz I don't know how she got graded into the same group as me.' (Actually tonight Georgie told me that. She said, 'I am shocked I got graded with Ace.')
I thought that was a pretty slack thing of Ace to say coz it was day one and everyone was nervous. Kia started to say, 'She wasn't that bad,' and I was glad she was gonna stick up for Georgie, but then Kia said, 'Honestly, that was almost good compared to the way she's been surfing lately. I think she's stopped challenging herself.' Megan said, 'Well, what's she doing here then?' They stopped just as Georgie turned up at the table with her dinner. She didn't hear. I don't think. She didn't act like she did.
After dinner we watched the 'Teahupoo Diary', which had the most awesome tow-out sessions on it. They are so gutsy. I'd die to do it but I'd be so scared. Taylor surfed at Teahupoo. She said you could be sitting in a boat, safe as anything while watching a 10 foot barrel just a few metres away. She said it's so slack they've taken the women's comp away from there. I agree.
My yawns were starting. Big, wide airless growls were creeping up my throat. I'd had to wait till 11.15 pm before it was safe to sneak into the bathroom with my diary.
Ace was in there forever. I'd been fighting the heavy eyelids when at two minutes to eleven the door of the bathroom finally opened. I'd counted nine footsteps as she made her way across the room to bed. The sheets shuffled and flapped a bit as she got comfortable. And I'm almost sure I heard her whisper something like, 'Why does he have to say that stuff?'
At seven minutes past eleven, Ace's breath began to slow and even out. I knew from listening to Dad at night that this was the sound you made as you drifted off to sleep. At home, it was my signal that it was safe for me to fall asleep too. And here in the Starfish Bungalow, it meant that at last it was safe to creep into the bathroom and open the first white page of my new diary.
AFTER THE VIDEO SESSION: The last thing we did before we went back to our bungalows was write down 3 things we want to achieve at camp. Shyan said it didn't matter if they were big or small things, but they had to be things we really wanted. We then had to seal them in an envelope and Shyan locked them away in a box. We're going to get them back on the last night.
This is what I put.
1. I want to get physically stronger so I can handle the bigger waves.
2. I want to master pulling in on my backhand coz I know that's what lets my surfing down.
3. Make the Australian Junior Team Training Camp.
I thought about putting down a 4th one, but I chickened out coz I didn't know if they'd make us read them out on the last night. I'd die of embarrassment if Kia knew that one of the things I wanted from this camp was to become friends with her.
Good night Micki,
Love Mickixx
ACE
By breakfast-time, they had already made us run two lengths of the beach plus do a thirty-minute pool session. I was less fit than I'd thought. My breakfast plate was looking a bit like Georgie's but I was starving.
I figured a big brekkie would get me through the rest of the day. Besides, Tim wasn't around to count the carbs and remind me that I needed lean muscle, not padding.
Carla and her clipboard came around to our table. 'So, Ace and Micki, you're on the lunch roster, which means you'll have to come in from the free-surf session at about twelve-fifteen.'
'Sur
e,' Micki squeaked.
I was actually planning on a bit of 'free sunbaking' then. If the rays were shining, I might have to 'accidentally' forget what Carla just told me. It's not as if Micki would report me. She'd only managed about ten words since her introduction speech.
Micki was not the pick to do kitchen duty with. Chatting was the only way to make the chores go quickly and somehow I couldn't see that happening with her. Perhaps I could have a word with Carla about swapping. She'd been sucking up since I'd arrived.
'Twelve-fifteen okay with you, Ace?' Carla asked.
I nodded. It was best not to say anything – then I wasn't really committing.
'Oh, Ace, I wanted to check up if you ate bread.' Carla looked down at my plate. 'Your breakfast tells me you do, even though your diet form says you don't.'
Was Carla having a go at me?
'I don't usually eat bread,' I told her.
'Well, they worked you hard, I'm not surprised you're hungry,' said Carla. 'The nutritionist will give his first talk this afternoon and he'll tell you that the bread here has a low GI and is very important in your diet.'
I don't think Carla was talking about four slices at a time, but Georgie certainly looked pleased with what she'd just heard.
'Maybe I'll have another piece,' Georgie said, grinning.
Kia must've looked at her 'cause Georgie got up from the table and spat, 'I was joking, Kia.' She was a bit oversensitive. If I was Georgie, I'd be grateful to have a friend like Kia who cared enough to be honest.
Georgie and Micki left the table and went out to the verandah.
'Don't worry about Georgie,' I said to Kia. 'She probably feels bad about herself.'
'I do, though.'
'Is she always this super-sensitive?'
'She has been lately,' Kia replied. 'I didn't get to finish what I was saying at dinner. You know, when we were talking about what Georgie was doing here?'
This was a story I wanted to hear. I'd heard of Georgie Elwood Ross. A friend of Tim's, who was a scout, was raving about her one day. He said she had the potential to be a great surfer; that she was super-strong and had a great style and it would only be a matter of time before the sponsors were banging down her doors.
I remembered because of what Tim said to me afterwards: 'Don't be threatened by her, babe.' He was massaging my shoulders. 'You'll always be sponsored, even if other chicks out there surf better than you. You're gorgeous and that's what the media likes even more.' But that wasn't exactly fair. OP wouldn't sponsor me if I couldn't surf.
Last night, when we had to write the three things we wanted to achieve, I wrote:
1. Get selected for the Junior Team Training Camp. (That was a sure thing but I thought I'd better put that in case my list was read out.)
2. Get a good tan. (Extreeeeeemely important.)
3. Win more world titles than Layne Beachley. (That way people would realise I was a hot surfer too!)
So when I found out that the Georgie in my bungalow, the girl I was about to be graded with, was actually Georgie Elwood Ross, I got nervous like I hadn't in ages. But the good thing about nerves was that they made me perform better.
Talk about a waste. Georgie stuffed up every second thing she tried.
There were three of us out there competing for every wave, squeezing in as many turns as we could – and Georgie, doing pretty much nothing. She probably assumed she'd be so much better than us. Well, that must've been a bit of a shock for her!
I grilled Kia. 'So tell us about Georgie.'
'She's just out there,' Kia said, pointing to the verandah where Georgie was hanging around chatting. 'I'll tell you later.'
But I wanted to know about this Georgie girl now.
'Why don't we go up to the bungalow?' I suggested. 'We'll say we're brushing our teeth. You can tell me about it up there. I want to check my messages anyway.'
'Did you get one this morning?' Kia was so loving the fact that she was sharing a room with Tim Parker's girlfriend. It was so obvious. She just about threw herself on top of me every time I went near my phone.
'Tim was probably still crashed out.' I added with a quick glance, 'He was having a party with Brent and Rasta.'
'Brent Dunn and Rasta! Rasta Domenico? The Rasta Domenico, world champion, number one – oh my God!'
Yep, she was loving it. The more excitable she got, the more casual I became. I had to admit I was having fun.
'Have you . . . have you,' she panted, ' met those guys before?'
'Yeeeaaah. They're our really good friends.'
Jake ruined my fun by intercepting our escape to the bungalow.
'Girls?' He stepped out in front of us. 'The video analysis session starts in ten minutes. And you're up first, Ace.'
'We're just off to brush our teeth,' I told him.
Jake was quite cute although not my type. It seemed like I was his, though, as I'm sure he was flirting with me.
'Don't be too long on those pearly whites.'
Yep, he definitely was.
We were now in the safety of our room. 'So,' I said, 'tell me the whole story about Georgie.'
'They selected her for this camp, like, months ago,' Kia began. 'She was surfing hot then. Everybody thought so too. Scouts were coming from everywhere to watch her. I know what they said about her 'cause my dad just has to tell me everything. You know, how she had a big future ahead of her and that she'd be sponsored in no time and how she could probably handle –'
'Yeah, yeah.' I got the general idea. 'So tell me why –'
But Kia kept going on with a story I didn't want to hear.
'Every day, I'd wait and wait for my dad to actually say something to me about how I was going. Maybe how I was surfing, or if any scouts had said anything about me as well, 'cause, like, I surf with Georgie, so they were going to see me too –'
She was on a rave. I didn't want to sit in on a family therapy session with some girl I'd just met. She was already a bit too chummy. I had to cut her off. Now.
'Don't you like it when your dad tells you stuff about other people's success?'
'What did you just say?' Kia asked.
'I said, don't you like it when your dad tells you stuff about other people? Like good stuff?'
I was playing with my phone. I had a message from my dad.
'gey seetie. hope campz ftn. Miss u. cu son. Daxxx'
I started to laugh. Dad was hopeless at texting. He said it was because his fingers were too fat.
'I don't think it's very funny.'
'Hey?' I looked up to find Kia almost standing over me. She was rocking backwards and forwards on the soles of her feet.
'That was really, really hurtful what you said.'
I couldn't tell if Kia looked like she was about to cry or start screaming. But there was something going on in that head.
'I'm sorry,' I carefully said. Oversensitive or what? 'I just meant –'
'I know what you meant, Ace.' Kia lay down on her bed and began to stare at the ceiling. 'Georgie said something to you, didn't she?'
'Georgie? I've hardly spoken to Georgie. I was asking you stuff about her.'
I went and brushed my teeth. This was starting to get weird. Through the bathroom mirror I could see Kia still staring at the ceiling. Her face hadn't moved.
'Come on, Kia.' I tried to put on a jolly voice 'cause I sure hadn't been out to upset her, just get some info. 'Brush your teeth. We'll be late for Jake. He might have to smack us.' Not even that made her smile.
'I'm fine,' Kia replied.
'Let's go. Come on.' I stood at the door. Kia still hadn't moved. Not even a millimetre.
'You go,' she said. 'I'll be there in a minute.'
I was just about to tell her I'd wait when I realised maybe she needed to do a poo. I hated people being around when I went. Especially when I was at a place I wasn't used to.
I was right. Two seconds later, just as I began to walk away, I heard the bathroom door inside the bungalow close. Phew! For a mi
nute I thought I'd caused some psycho freak-show moment.
'Hurry up, Ace.' Jake sounded cross. 'We've started with Georgie's session. Okay, Georgie, what did you think about your –' Jake stopped and turned to me. 'Where's Kia? I told you we were starting in ten minutes.' He frowned at his watch. 'That was almost twenty minutes ago. If you read your booklet you'll see that punctuality is one of our expectations.'
'Sorry, Jake.' I bit my lip. 'She's coming.'
A little smile slipped through his lips. He forgave me.
'Don't run late for me again, Ace. I expect punctuality otherwise I'll think you're not taking this seriously.' Then he winked. He was definitely flirting with me. Did he really think he was any competition next to Tim Parker?
'Now, where was I?' Jake frowned. 'Oh yeah, Georgie, what did you think about your first trial?'
'Crap.' Georgie came straight out and said it. 'I wasn't in the right spot, which stuffed my choice of waves.'
'Let's look at wave selection,' Jake told us. 'As you all know, if you don't get two high-scoring waves in that twenty-minute period then you won't advance to the next round in the competition. What could Georgie have done to get herself in a better position?'
Megan's hand was up and waving. Maybe she was the one I had to watch out for, not Georgie.
'I would've got out, run down the beach, paddled back out with the rip to save time and energy, then taken an inside position on that peak.'
'Absolutely,' Jake agreed. 'Coolina is the perfect break to use that strategy.'
'Well, I would do that usually' – Georgie's face resembled a beetroot – 'but a twenty-minute trial, I mean, sometimes you don't do it the way you would in a free-surfing session.'
'Exactly,' Jake said. 'With free surfing there's no pressure, no time restriction. The conditions are totally different to competing. You have to adapt. You have to be able to come up with those strategies when under pressure.'
'But my head goes all mushy.' Georgie looked around at us. 'Doesn't anyone else get a bit overwhelmed by the lack of time and the . . .'
Her voice wafted off as Kia slipped through the side door and took a seat next to Megan. She'd changed into jeans.