by Debbie Burns
“I found him, Kurt.”
She was looking at the table, not him, and her voice was soft. It took Kurt a minute to process her words. He played them over and over while she fidgeted with the tie string of her pants.
“I didn’t think it could ever happen,” she said into the silence. “I didn’t think the world was small enough, but it turns out it is. I mean, we lived in Texas even.”
Kurt swallowed hard and leaned forward, pressing his thumbs into his temples. He wanted to drown out her words, wanted her to stop talking. His stomach flopped like a fish on land. All these years he thought knowing was an impossibility. Thought he’d never know more than a handful of nonessential details. His father’s name was Kurt. He had brown eyes and a kind smile. He was from North Carolina, and he wasn’t in the military.
He was also the only guy she slept with the month Kurt was conceived.
“A friend of his—one of the guys he was hanging with the night we spent together—came into the diner. I wouldn’t have recognized him from a hundred thousand other worn-out ex-soldiers coming to the post for a weekend brush of nostalgia. But he recognized me. He gave me a name and a number. He told me a little about what your father’s doing now, if you’d like to know.”
Kurt held up his hand and shook his head. “You know his name? His last name?”
“Yeah. His friend even had a picture on his phone. The resemblance was undeniable.”
Kurt dragged his fingers through his hair. He crossed over to a window, not able to open it fast enough even though it was only in the midfifties outside. His skin was hot, burning even, and his fingers and toes were humming with electricity.
“Does William know?”
“Yes.”
“What’d he say?”
“He’s too much like you to say much of anything.”
“Did Nana know?”
“No, this happened after.”
Kurt walked into the kitchen and braced himself against the counter, drumming his fingers on the Formica. “I’d like to think about it.”
“I understand. There’s no rush. Look, if you decide not to open it, no one’s going to blame you. This is yours to do with as you wish.” Sara stood up and placed the book, picture frame, and letters back in the box.
“Don’t put that letter in there. Not if I’m supposed to take that stuff with me. Keep it here. I’ve got to think about it, and I don’t want it with me while I do.”
“That makes sense.” She sank back to the couch like she was overcome with a wave of fatigue. “Kurt, should I not have told you?”
He drummed his fingers some more. “No, I’m glad you did.”
“It doesn’t have to change anything, if you don’t want it to. But it might also offer you some clarity. Think about it.”
“I will.” He leaned forward and pressed his forehead against the cool Formica counter. Most of his life, he’d have given pretty much anything for this news. Now that the impossible wasn’t impossible, it felt like he’d been handed Pandora’s box.
He was a soldier. He’d been trained to stand his ground and fight. To face any adversary head-on. Bravery was in his blood. So why the hell did hearing this make him want to run and run and never stop running?
Chapter 21
“These have to be the cutest wedding favors ever.” Kelsey held up a chubby, handblown glass honey pot, admiring it in the sunlight streaming onto Ida’s covered front porch. Kelsey had just finished using raffia to tie on a wooden dipper and handmade paper tag that read Sweet Beginnings. On the tag’s other side were Megan’s and Craig’s names and their wedding date, now just two days away. The four-ounce honey pot was small and squat-bottomed, and thanks to the honey inside, it shone with an amber glow in the afternoon light. “Would it be bad luck if I took mine home today? Maybe I should wait until after you text me beachside pictures of the big moment.”
From her spot at the end of the eight-foot-long folding table that had been set up for this afternoon’s craft project, Megan waved her hand dismissively. “Take one now. I’m not letting in any room for superstition or worry or anything else. And after you endure all this sticky mess with me, you deserve a giant pot, not a tiny one.”
“These are perfect. I’m going to put mine where I see it all the time.”
Megan had purchased three gallons of honey from a sustainable farm in the Missouri wine country not far from where they were hosting the reception next weekend, and now their job was to get the honey into the small pots. “They are cute, aren’t they? Only I’m worried we won’t have enough honey. I didn’t really account for the spills in my calculations.”
The front door pulled open, and Ida rejoined them on the porch. She held a glass measuring cup with a spouted rim and a plastic funnel. “These could help keep the outsides of the pots from getting so messy. What else can I get you?”
Kelsey had mentioned to Ida during their dinner that she’d volunteered to help assemble Megan’s wedding favors. Ida had been so excited by the idea that she’d offered for the assembly to take place at her house and to provide lunch as well. Megan had been eager to meet her ever since she’d learned Sabrina’s sister was living next door, and she was deeply touched by the offer.
Megan’s wedding was approaching with lightning speed. Kelsey was impressed with how her friend was handling everything. Things were nearly as busy at the shelter as they were here, from all the recent publicity and with the construction in progress. On top of coordinating everything there, Megan was still settling into her new life, preparing for the baby that was on the way, and planning her wedding. Thankfully, the favors were the last big item on Megan’s wedding to-do list. Kelsey suspected Megan had to feel like she was sliding into home base in the nick of time. She and Craig were flying out tonight to have a full day to relax on the island before the ceremony on Sunday. Megan wouldn’t return from her short honeymoon until a week from today, which would be the day before the reception.
“These will help for sure,” Megan said as she took the measuring cup and funnel from Ida. A honeybee, drawn in by the sweet smell, buzzed in a circle around her. “We should be good to go now.”
“Yell if you need something. I’ve got a chicken pot pie in the oven, and I’m finishing the salad. And will tea do, or would you like lemonade?”
Kelsey and Megan exchanged looks of agreement. The sticky honey on their fingers and the pleasant scent in the air would be all the sweet they’d need. “Tea’s fine,” they said in unison.
“Kels,” Megan said after Ida had headed back inside, “I want you to know that if I was having a traditional wedding, you’d be a bridesmaid for sure. Honestly, it’d just be you and Ashley, and Sophie and Tess for the little ones. I never wanted a big wedding, though I never considered whisking away to a private island either. It still feels a bit surreal.”
“Everything about your life is surreal.” Kelsey couldn’t help but shoot a wistful glance next door. Kurt and his grandfather were inside, and an electric saw and a drill pierced the quiet afternoon at sporadic intervals.
Prior to this rehab, she’d have sworn her life was close to perfect, even if she wasn’t sharing it with a committed partner. But then Kurt had shown up and stirred up a wild mess of emotions, and one thing had become clear. Despite any lingering insecurities or uncertainties, she wanted him in her life. And not only in her life. She wanted him to comprise a giant, integral, life-wouldn’t-be-the-same-without-you part of her life.
Lately, he’d been really reserved. Worse than reserved. Withdrawn. Then this morning while they were working with the dogs, she’d closed her hand over the back of his arm, and it had seemed as if he’d stiffened at her touch. She put it off to his level of focus when working with the dogs. Immediately after all the animals were taken care of, his grandfather arrived and the two of them dove into ceiling repairs on the second floor of the house.
&nb
sp; She wished she’d had a few minutes with Kurt first, minutes where something else wasn’t demanding his attention. Last night, he’d scarcely seemed interested in their good-night kiss. She’d put it down to exhaustion, but added to what had happened this morning, she wasn’t sure.
“What’s up, Kels?” Megan was suddenly all attention. Kelsey’s thoughts must have been readable on her face.
She gave a one-shoulder shrug. “I wish I could say. Kurt’s been a little weird lately, but I think he’s just tired. All he does is work. And I’m not kidding when I say that. I’ve never met anyone with his drive. In between one tiring chore to the next, sometimes he even sneaks into the attic to do pull-ups with the rafters.”
Megan laughed at the last part. “Well, considering the work you and everybody around puts into the shelter, that’s saying something. Maybe he needs some guidance from you on how to relax. I’m glad you’re bringing him to the reception. I can’t say my short trips here have helped me get to know him. As long as you believe in him though, that’s what matters. That and he truly gets what an amazing person he’s hooking up with.”
“I certainly won’t tell you he’s easy to get to know, but he’s a really good guy, Megan. His softer side is cinnamon-roll soft. It’s just covered by prickly pear cactus.”
“There’s a good visual.” From her purse stowed underneath the table, Megan’s phone rang out with its fun, chirpy beat. “Good thing I cleaned my hands.” She leaned sideways a bit less fluidly than pre-pregnant Megan. It’s Patrick, she mouthed before saying hello.
Kelsey was getting the next pot ready when, after a bit of silence, Megan interjected with “That’s horrible. How sad. Where did you hear this?”
Kelsey waited, watching Megan’s expression for the level of tension lining her face—which expressed deep concern—until she hung up a few minutes later.
“You won’t believe this, Kels.” Megan dropped her phone on the table and let out a sigh. “Patrick heard on the radio that Mason Redding was in a car wreck last night. They announced he wouldn’t be able to play in the playoffs if the Red Birds win tomorrow’s last game. He’s got a broken collarbone and a concussion.”
Kelsey’s jaw fell open in disbelief. After his wonderful donation, he wasn’t only a high-profile baseball player that the shelter staff had had a brush of fame with. He was a great guy. Having met him and been moved by his sincerity and kindness, Kelsey felt this news much more personally than she would have otherwise. She suspected Megan and Patrick did too.
“That’s so sad.” She pulled out her phone and read the story that Channel 3 had posted. She gasped at the picture of an overturned, mangled SUV that had been tossed up on a grassy hillside by Highway 40. In the background were flares, several police cars, ambulances, and fire trucks. It had clearly been a serious crash. Kelsey skimmed the article and saw that Mason had been in the backseat. The article stated that while all passengers had been treated at a nearby hospital, two remained, and one was in critical condition. “That’s so, so horrible. It doesn’t say who the other people are. I hope they’re okay.”
She was sure the whole city would be abuzz. The Red Birds were currently neck and neck with the Voyagers, their biggest rival, and only one more game—tomorrow’s—would decide who went to the playoffs. Without this season’s best hitter, it would be a harder game to win. But Mason wasn’t just a Red Birds player. He was a real person.
“We have his address,” Megan said, probably thinking the same thing. “Do you think we should send flowers? Or a card at least?”
Kelsey nodded. “Yeah, definitely.”
Megan closed her hands over her stomach absentmindedly and let out a long, slow breath. “Don’t you wish there were no accidents?”
Megan’s father had died in a highway crash when she was a kid. This was the kind of news she always took personally. Kelsey agreed as they resumed the honey pot assembly in a subdued mood. They’d known each other long enough that neither one tried to fill the silence with empty chatter as they absorbed the news.
As a single bee became four, all buzzing around them, Mr. Longtail hopped over the porch railing and onto the table. He planted himself in an open spot near the center. His tail twitched periodically, and his head moved in circles as he watched the bees.
Pepper, who Kelsey had brought along with Kurt’s okay, lifted her head from a doze to eye the cat before collapsing back onto the cool, brick porch floor. The Rottweiler’s belly was getting so round and full that Kelsey was counting the days until the house would be full of portly little puppies.
“Hey, isn’t that Rob’s van?” Megan asked, drawing Kelsey’s attention to the white commercial van heading past Ida’s house and pulling into the driveway next door. “You aren’t getting any more dogs, are you?”
“No. Maybe he’s stopping by for a visit.”
Kelsey wiped the back of her hand on a rag and watched from across the wide lawns as two people stepped from the van. Rob was indeed the driver. A woman about Kelsey’s age stepped down from the passenger side. Kelsey felt a rush of appreciation at how pretty she was. A brunette with long, wavy locks, dressed in a sweater, leggings, and tall boots, she was eye-catching without a doubt.
Rob didn’t have kids, but from here, the woman looked young enough to be his daughter. Kelsey was mulling over their connection to each other when she heard the front door of Sabrina’s house pull open, catching on the frame as always. Kurt stepped onto the porch, brushing dust off his jeans and grinning. It was a deep grin, one she’d only seen half a dozen times.
He’d made it to the top step when the girl broke into a jog. From this distance, it felt like a movie, watching the girl run across the lawn, up the steps, and into Kurt’s arms. Kelsey’s ribs locked in tight around her heart. She told herself it was the girl doing the running and the deeper part of the hugging. And besides, it was just a hug. Family hugged. Friends hugged. Everyone hugged. That’s not just a hug, Kels. She’s burying her face in his chest.
They’d stepped apart, and the girl was clearly brushing tears off her cheeks when Kelsey forced herself to look away.
She locked her attention on the pot in front of her and grabbed the funnel.
“Do you know who she is?” Megan asked quietly, carefully. Kelsey shook her head. She’d lifted one of the big jars and was about to start pouring when Megan added, “Looks like we’re about to.”
In her peripheral vision, Kelsey could see the trio headed their way. She was debating whether to act like she’d not seen what she’d seen when Pepper rolled up onto all fours. She let out a single but authoritative bark. Although Kelsey wasn’t worried too much about Pepper being territorial, she’d tied her long leash onto one of the table legs for such an occasion.
Gathering courage she wasn’t entirely sure she felt, Kelsey stood up and Megan followed. The girl, who was prettier and prettier the closer she got, walked in the middle of the group as they crossed the yards.
Whatever it is, it is, Kelsey determined, locking her shoulders and standing straight. Together, she and Megan headed down the brick steps to the stone path in front of them. Pepper let out a second ruff and wagged her tail, though she didn’t try to leave her spot by the table.
“Kurt tells us there are wedding bells in the air,” Rob called out by way of a greeting as they walked up.
Because it was the easiest thing to do, Kelsey kept her gaze locked on Rob.
“Kelsey, Megan, I’d like you to meet someone who gives Kurt a run for his money when it comes to her training ability,” Rob continued. “Ladies, this is Tess. She’s been living in Europe the last year or so and came home this week. These two kids traveled all over the Midwest with me when they were an awkward, gangly pair of adolescents, and while I’d like to think the credit for their talent is due to my tutorage, I know it’s not. Tess, this is Kelsey—she’s running the rehab with Kurt—and Megan, the shelter dire
ctor I told you about.”
Megan smiled warmly and glanced Kelsey’s way in confirmation. “Nice to meet you, Tess. We’d shake your hand, but we’re both a mess of honey.”
Up close, it was clear Tess had in fact been crying. Her eyes were dry, but wetness still clung to her thick, long eyelashes, and the whites of her eyes were brushed with red blood vessels. As nicely dressed as Tess was, Kelsey would’ve expected her to be wearing makeup, but she didn’t seem to be. With lashes that thick, she didn’t need it.
Tess tucked a strand of dark-brown hair behind one ear. “That’s okay. It’s nice to meet you both. It’s wonderful what the shelter’s doing to help out so many dogs. I can’t wait to meet them.” She sounded sweet and a bit nasal from crying. Kelsey wondered what had happened to upset her. Hopefully, it wasn’t anything too serious. And, a bit selfishly, she hoped it wasn’t just a rush of heavy emotion at reconnecting with Kurt.
“Want to walk around with us while I show her the dogs, Kels?” Kurt asked.
Kelsey’s ribs unlocked a bit at Kurt’s words and the sound of her name on his tongue. She met his gaze, and relief flooded her. It was soft and pleading.
Whatever this girl meant to him, Kurt was clearly not putting Kelsey on the back burner. Maybe Tess’s arrival added to the already complex muddle of their relationship, and maybe it didn’t. The only way to find out was to keep in the running.
“Sure.” She looked Megan’s way. “Megan, want to come with us? I know we’ve got a lot to do, so I won’t be long.”
“Go for it. I’ll hang here with Pepper since I’m already knee-deep in this mess.”
“Sure. If lunch is ready, tell Ida I won’t be long.”
As they headed back toward Sabrina’s house, Kurt’s hand closed reassuringly over the small of Kelsey’s back, making the whole experience a little bit easier.