by Debbie Zello
Cheri was in her senior year of high school. After her sister’s death, she threw herself into her studies, having missed much with her sister’s illness. She had pulled her grades back up and was due to graduate with honors in a week. The only thing missing would be her sister’s smile at her graduation.
Cheri got home from school, pulling into the driveway behind her dad’s car. She unlocked the door and said, “Hey everybody, I’m home!” There wasn’t any answer. In fact, the house felt oddly quiet to her. She started up the stairs and went to her room to change into sweats.
The door to her parent’s bedroom was closed. She thought it was strange in the middle of the day but who was she to judge. She waited a few more minutes and then approached the door calling, “Mom? Dad? You guys in there?” There was no answer. She knocked. Again, no answer. She opened the door…
“It’s a murder, suicide. Looks like the woman shot the man and then turned the gun on herself,” the detective said. “The daughter found them. She’s still inside, in the living room. There’s no other family. She said her sister just died four months ago.”
The social worker went into the house and found Cheri on the couch wrapped up in a blanket. One look at her and she could see Cheri was in shock. White and pasty skin and dead eyes. She approached her slowly and sat next to her. In a very low and calm voice she said, “Your name is Cheri, right?” Cheri nodded. “My name is Ruth. I’m here to help you.”
Cheri turned to face her. As the tears rolled from her eyes, down her cheeks, she whispered, “Can you turn back time?”
Chapter Fourteen
Gareth left for his final shoot for this year. He had completed a movie in the same area before, so at least for this one, it didn’t feel strange. He left Tucker with a good idea of what he was looking for in the final edit of Yukon Love, a horrible working title, in Gareth’s opinion. Somebody had better rethink that before its release. It was a studio production and not his baby, so he had nothing to do with the final title.
Everything is big in Texas would normally just be a saying if not for the fact that it’s the truth. It takes three days at least to drive through it at its widest point. You’ll ride past gates with the names of ranches carved into them but never see the ranch house. That’s because it’s two miles in from the road.
Gareth checked into his hotel that just so happened not to be the same one as his crew and actors. The last shoot taught him you need some time to yourself. Still, he was close enough if someone needed him.
The first four days went perfectly. The weather cooperated and the actors knew their lines. It was like being on a honeymoon. Then it was over. Monsoon rains began. One of the horses came up lame. One of the actors had a cold. It was going to be a long shoot.
The trial, where the plaintiffs would have little trouble proving her guilt, and Cheri had the uphill battle of proving her innocence, was due to start the twenty-fifth of February.
The Friday before, she met with her attorney. “I know that you have a lot of experience in a courtroom. I know you know how to ask a question. But, standing in front of a witness and asking is a whole different thing than sitting in the chair being asked the question,” he said.
“I’m sure. So what is your advice?” she asked.
“It’s fine to take a moment to mull over your response. But not long enough to make it look like you’re trying to manufacture an answer.”
“Okay.”
“Don’t be afraid to ask for a rephrasing of the question. But again not too often as to look like you’re wasting time.”
“Okay.”
“Lastly, don’t lean over to tell me anything. Write down anything that comes to you. We will have time to talk, periodically.”
“Sure. You forgot to tell me not to fidget in my seat. And to keep my face even, not too much smiling and don’t frown. But can I stick my tongue out at David…Please!” she said, in an attempt to lighten her mood.
“When it’s all over, we’ll both do it. Deal?” he said smiling. “Secretly, I’ve always wanted to do that.”
“Me too. I guess I’ll see you Monday. If I lose everything, will you give me a job?”
“Yes. However, I’m going to do everything I can to make sure you don’t lose anything. Okay?”
“Okay,” she said, completely unconvincingly. She left his office and went back to hers to get some things taken care of. She hoped she would be back in a day, two at the most. Any longer than that and she might lose her mind.
Sitting at her desk with her elbows on the top and her head in her hands, she let her mind wander for a moment. Gareth didn’t call, e-mail, text, or send a letter back. She knew he got the card because it didn’t come back to her. So it wasn’t anything to him.
A lone tear fell splashing on the desk blotter. “Can I do anything for you before I leave,” Piper asked, breaking Cheri’s disappointment with the world. Cheri looked up smiling.
“No. Go home to your family. Have a nice weekend.”
“I was thinking we should go out for dinner tonight. I need a night out. I’ll call Ben and tell him I’m going out,” Piper said starting to turn.
“I have plans tonight, sorry. Maybe another time. I have a lot to do this weekend to get ready and all. You know.”
“Okay, if you say so. Call me if you need to talk. Make sure you call when you’re done on Monday. Don’t forget, okay?”
“I’ll call. Now go home! And thanks. You’re a good friend.”
Piper shut off her computer. She got her purse and coat and headed out the door, closing it softly behind her. All the way home, she had a terrible feeling. She couldn’t shake it all night.
Cheri shut down her computer. She grabbed her purse and briefcase with some things she needed to go over for her testimony. It was snowing when she got to her car. She put her things on the front seat next to her but stood outside with her face to the sky. The snowflakes melted on her still warm skin, giving her the feeling that they were the cold tears from heaven.
She got in her car and put her head on the steering wheel. “I need you Connie. Mom and Dad if you can hear me, send me some help. I can’t do this alone anymore.”
Gareth sent everyone home for two weeks. The shoot was a complete disaster. Everyone was sick with the flu. He covered himself with anti-bacterial hand wash every ten minutes, grateful that he hadn’t caught it yet.
His flight home was brief. He was glad to be back for a few days. Get caught up on things and maybe even relax. He had been working flat out. Even when he went to his parents, he was teleconferencing and reading scripts.
Gareth walked in his house and almost kissed the tile in the foyer. He walked around for a few minutes before going into the dining room to pour himself a few fingers worth of Jack Honey. The best anti-flu medicine known to man.
He sat in a chair savoring the delicious brown liquid when his gaze settled on the pile of mail at the other end of the table. It looked huge. It was probably two months’ worth of not much but crap. Still, he needed to go through it.
Taking a deep breath and blowing it out through his now Jack infused mouth, he got up and swept the mail down to the other end of the table where he was sitting. He went to the kitchen to retrieve the trashcan from under the sink and brought it back.
He attacked the mail in-between sips of his honey. “Junk, junk, might be something, crap, junk…,” he said looking briefly at each piece determining what pile to put it in. The trash was beginning to fill up quickly.
Gareth’s phone rang and he took it out of its holder and looked at the screen. “Fuck, its Tucker. He can’t know I’m home already unless he has my house bugged or something,” he said aloud. “Hey Tuck. What’s up?”
“A little birdie told me you’re home for a few days.”
“I’m going to wring some fucking bird’s neck. Who ratted me out?” Gareth said continuing to look at the mail.
“I’m hurt, Gareth. Really, hurt. I thought we had a thing. Now you don’
t want to see me,” Tucker said, teasingly.
“Tomorrow, okay? Right now, I want to drink my Jack and forget who I am for a night. And don’t fucking call at six and tell Naomi to bounce me out of bed,” he said, picking up a red envelope and turning it over. He looked at the return address from Massachusetts. He opened it and pulled out the card.
Christmas Wishes
From
Far Away
He smiled and opened it. Inside he read.
I need you.
If September was more than just a vacation hook-up to you.
Please call me.
If it was more to me, than it is to you.
Please don’t come back.
Gareth wasn’t smiling anymore. Her note sounded desperate.
“Gareth, are you listening to me?” Tucker asked.
“I got to go, Tuck. And I won’t be over tomorrow either. I have to get to Massachusetts.”
“Have fun!”
Gareth emptied his bags on his bed and grabbed the stuff he brought to Canada out of his closet. He threw it in the bag not taking the time to fold it. With his phone on speaker, he called the airport to book the next available flight to Boston.
He left a message on Naomi’s cell explaining the mess he had left in both his bedroom and dining room. He told her about going to the Cape and asked her to once again take care of things for him.
He got to the airport that he had just flown into a few hours previously. He was beginning to hate the place. His flight was in an hour so he had time to grab a sandwich to eat on the plane. With a stop in Chicago he would arrive in Boston at 7 AM their time.
Gareth contemplated calling her, but feared she would try to stop him from coming. There was no way he wasn’t going to go to her after reading that note. He had to tell her how much he wanted her and hope for the best.
The layover in Chicago was an hour. Just enough time to get to the gate. His flight was called as every sort of scenario went through his mind. “I need you”
“I need you, too,” he whispered.
Chapter Fifteen
Cheri wandered into the store and went directly to the pain relief aisle. She had either heard or read somewhere that you could take a bottle of pills and go to sleep never to wake again. She didn’t think she could cut herself. She despised guns. Hanging was out of the question, as she didn’t have a place to accomplish that. Swallowing pills seemed the best answer.
Her next stop was the liquor store for a large bottle of Lambrusco. It was a sweet red wine that she fancied on certain occasions. This was such an occasion.
When she got home, she saw the For Sale posted on the front of the Weisman’s cottage. A pang of more sorrow hit her. Soon a similar sign would be posted on her little refuge. Another would appear on the building that housed her office. “Everything’s for sale,” she mused.
Cheri opened the door and walked into her kitchen. Shrugging off her coat and throwing it over the chair, she looked for her corkscrew. “Should I pour it in a glass or just chug it from the bottle,” she said thinking. She shook her head and said, “Chug it, I think.”
Taking the wine and the pills, she went to her bedroom and set them on her nightstand. She changed out of her suit and into a comfy set of thick sweats. Cheri loved the feel of the fleece-like lining against her skin. “Might as well be comfortable,” she said aloud.
She looked around formulating her plan. She didn’t want to make any kind of a mess that someone would later have to clean up. Not sure if she would defecate or urinate at the end, she spread a new shower-curtain liner on the top of the bed. “There!” she said, as if she had accomplished a huge task.
Satisfied that everything was just right, Cheri lit her fireplace and sat on the couch to compose a note of explanation.
Piper,
I’m sorry that you are the one to find this. I know it will be you,
because you’re the only one that will know I’m missing. Don’t feel
bad that you didn’t stop me. You wouldn’t have been able to do that
anyway. I didn’t take that money. I didn’t sign those checks.
I’m just tired. It’s no one’s fault. My important papers are in the
deposit box at the bank. You have the key. Thank you for all you have
done for me. Good-bye.
Cheri signed it and placed it on the kitchen table under the corner of the conch shell in the center. With a deep breath she sighed and said, “That’s done.”
She put her boots on and her heavy winter coat, then wrapping a blanket around her, she left for her last walk on her beach.
Gareth landed in Boston and rented a Chevy or maybe it was a Ford, it didn’t matter to him anyway. He kept checking his watch. It was an hour and a half drive to an hour forty-five to her cottage in good traffic. He was hoping everyone was staying home this morning.
The sun was just coming up when he landed. Now it was in his window blinding him on his drive south. He was trying very hard not to break all of the vehicular laws in Massachusetts in his attempt to get to her as fast as he could.
Cheri woke up on the couch. It was so warm in her cottage when she got back from her walk and she was so cold, she sat in front of the fire to get warmed up before going to her room. She didn’t remember falling asleep but obviously, that was what happened.
She stretched trying to get the kink to leave her neck. When that didn’t work, she stood up to get a full neck-roll done. That was better. Cheri looked at her door that she had left unlocked. She didn’t want the authorities to break the door down to get in. She shrugged her shoulders and said, “I still have tonight.” Why she thought you could only do yourself in at night was a mystery to her, but that’s what she had decided to do.
She made and drank her coffee. She put her boots back on as well as her coat and blanket and then ventured out for another last walk on her beach.
Gareth arrived at her house and walked around to knock on the door. He could see her coffee cup on the table and the fire on in the living room, so he knew she must have been walking. He walked back to his car to retrieve the little gift she had made for him. He set it on the arm of the Adirondack chair near the door so she would see it as soon as she climbed the stairs.
Gareth looked down the beach to see if he could spot her. There she was several hundred feet away throwing stones in the surf. He smiled when he saw that she was wrapped in a blanket. She was a warm weather person like him. This might just work to his advantage.
He hid behind the outdoor shower at the Weisman’s house figuring he could see her without being noticed. Then he just had to wait.
Cheri had finished throwing the handful of stones she had found that morning. No need to save them as her collecting days were over. She turned and began to walk back to her little home. The waves were strong this morning telling Cheri of a storm at sea. Pity she wouldn’t be around to see the gifts it would bring.
Cheri stood in front of the big house next door to the Weisman’s tiny place and put her hand on the sand fence that partially surrounded it. She stared at it for several minutes before she yelled, “Why are you so lonely? Why doesn’t anyone love you?” Getting no reply, she yelled to the sky, “Connie, please help me. I need to talk to you.”
Giving the fence a little push, she began to walk to her “little cottage over there, the white one.” She noted that the Weisman’s had a For Sale sign on this side, too. Cheri didn’t like change. It was usually heartbreaking.
She climbed her stairs and her eyes fixed on the little hamster perched on his sandy driftwood stand. At first, it didn’t register exactly what she was looking at. Moments passed before she heard, “Who is Connie and what do you need to talk about?”
Cheri’s shoulders began to quake as the tears poured out from her eyes running off the blanket and splashing on the porch floor. Gareth, noticing her distress, ran up the steps, turned her and wrapped her securely in his arms. “What the hell is wrong, Cheri? What’s happened?�
�� When she couldn’t answer him, he picked her up and got her inside, placing her on the couch.
She was very near hysteria as he knelt on the floor in front of her. “Cheri, please talk to me. What the hell is going on?” She just stared at him continuing to shake and cry. “I’m going to make some coffee and give you a chance to calm down. Then we’re talking,” he said kissing her forehead.
He got up and went to the kitchen to start a fresh pot of coffee. He got it all assembled and pressed the start button all the while talking to her in hushed tones about nothing in particular. He got out two clean cups and went to pick up her dirty one on the table when he noticed a note there. Picking it up, he read it.
He raised his head from the paper and looked at her. He said softly, “Cheri, what is this?” She turned to look at him seeing what he had in his hand but said nothing. Again, he said louder, “What is this, Cheri?” She kept the same haunted look on her face as a shudder ran through her.
Gareth took the shudder to mean she was still cold. He went to her bedroom to get the blanket from her bed. He stood at the doorway riveted to the spot by the scene before him. He looked from the plastic wrapped bed to the nightstand where the wine and pills were.
Closing his eyes and taking a few minutes to breathe deeply, he knew that whatever happened next would be what they would both remember for the rest of their lives. He stepped into the room and over to the offending items and picked them up.
Gareth set them on the coffee table in front of Cheri. With tears in his eyes and as calm a voice as he could muster he said, “This is what you were going to do? This is what you want? To die? Before, I could even tell you how much I love you?”
Cheri had stopped crying. He could see that she was breathing but he didn’t know if she was listening. “Nothing was right after I left you. I wasn’t happy. I couldn’t sleep well without you beside me. I thought of you all the time. I was miserable. I realized that I love you.”