Papa.” It slipped from me in a whisper.
I can't believe what my eyes are seeing. He looks smaller than he once did. Older. Much older. His hair is completely gray. He's chubbier than I remember, or maybe he's not. If I'm honest, the vision I have of him in my head is a God amongst men. A man so strong he could've taken down an army all by himself.
So what changed, what made my brother and whole family turn on my father the way they did?
What made my brother keep me from the father I loved?
What made my brother swear on our mother's grave that he'd kill our father if he ever came back?
Why is he here?
How is he here?
Why now?
My memories of him are so messed up. I remember how hard he was on my brother, how he would hurt my mother sometimes, how he would look at me like I was dirt on his shoe, but then there are memories of him telling me that I was his little princess. It has confused my mind for years because I don't know what's real and what's not.
“Get. Out!” I jump out of my damn skin. I forgot Hammer was here for a moment. I don't know how when he's holding my hand, but I did. Hammer jumps to his feet. Holy fuck, he really is tall. Compared to our father, he's enormous.
“Samuel, please, I just want to make sure she's okay.”
My mouth is bone dry as I watch Hammer take a step forward, his arms around his big chest. “A: My name is Hammer. You ever call me by my given name again, which isn't Samuel, and I'll kill you.” That's right his name is simply Sam. Jett told me that was because Hillary didn't see the point of calling him Samuel if his name would just be shortened to Sam. “B: You are not welcome here. You know full well you're not allowed within five miles of her. C: How the fuck did you even know she was here?”
“I followed you here. She's my daughter. I've been watching her for a while.” I swallow hard. He's been following me for a long time, I know he has, and I'm not sure I like that fact. I don't even know how he's been following me without being seen. I have so many people around me that would have seen him, but obviously, they haven't. “I just wanted to make sure that you're okay, Maria.”
“She's fine. Now, I'm tellin' you, old man, get the fuck outta here before Draven arrives and puts a bullet in your stupid fuckin' brain!”
My heart is pounding so hard I feel like I'm going to have a heart attack. All the years I prayed I'd see my father again, and here I am wishing he'd just go away. I'm not in the right frame of mind for this right now. I'm scared out of my mind that there is something wrong with my baby. I've had minutes to get to know my brother, minutes where I should have had months.
Draven is on his way home, or so Hammer informed me because he called Draven and told him what had happened and how I need him. If he arrives here and sees my father, he'll kill him without a seconds thought.
Family is everything, but so is loyalty. I don't know if my father has any of that.
“I knew you'd be just like him. So full of yourself. I had hoped for better, but what could I expect when your whore of a mother...” I scream the second Hammer's fist connects with my father's jaw, knocking him right off his feet, and I'm crying in fear. I don't want to see this. I don't want my brother to beat my father in front of me like this.
I know everyone says he's an evil man, that if I could only remember what he'd done, I'd never want even to hear the name Joseph Vidal again. However, I don't remember what happened, and no one will tell me. So, of course, all I see is my daddy, and I hate that I can't just reach out to him and have him hold me.
“You ever so much as think about my mother again and I'll rip your fuckin' throat out!”
“Hammer!” I'm shaking so badly I think I'm going to vomit. However, my eyes lock with Jett's, and I know I'll be okay. He's here. Finally.
“Get him the fuck away from my sister before I do somethin' I won't regret!” Hammer drags my father to his feet and pushes him toward a furious looking Stryker, who grabs him tightly.
“Maria, I just want to talk to you.”
“Please leave. You can't be here, Daddy, Draven will kill you.” I sob a little. No matter what he's done, he's still my father, and this hurts so much because I really want him to hold me like he did when I was a little girl. I want him to make it all better.
“I don't give a damn about Draven! You're my daughter, and I have every right to be here for you right now.”
“Leave. Right now!” I jump again and clasp my hands over my face, sobbing as Jett yells at my father. I can't do this right now. Don't they understand how scared I am? All I want is to know my baby is okay!
“Every single one of you, out now!” An unfamiliar voice cuts through me, silencing everyone in the room. “This is a hospital, not a boxing ring.” The doctor, I realize that now. “Mrs. Jackson does not need this right now. Please leave.”
“Jett!” In a panic, I call his name while looking up at him, my hand outstretched. He can't leave me here without him. He smiles, walks toward me and takes my hand in his. He kisses my head, and I calm my tears.
“Hammer?” He turns to look at me, his hand on the door. “Thank you,”
“I'll be right outside.” I nod and smile at him. Everything has changed between us this evening. Everything. I finally feel like my brother is my brother and not a man who hates my guts. He was just scared to show me that he loved me, but that's over now.
It's so nerve-racking listening to the doctor telling me to relax and breathe while she performs the ultrasound. All the time Jett is holding my hand as he sits on the high-back chair beside my bed, his other hand rubbing my shaking leg. There are so many things going through my head right now, and nothing at all at the same time.
“Maria?” I open my eyes and look to the doctor. She's smiling at me.
“Is everything okay with my baby?”
“Doctor Willson?” Jett urges.
“It's gone.” I sob while trying not to. My fucking heart is breaking in ways I didn't even know were possible. God help me, what am I going to do now?
Then I hear it. I do hear it, right? The loud thumping of a heartbeat through the wall speakers?
“As you can hear, your little one is just fine.”
“Oh, thank God,” Jett rests his head on my hand for a moment in relief. I'm numb with it. I think I'm too scared to breathe in case I misheard her.
“Little one was just being lazy. It happens more than you think, and trust me; we have plenty of Mom's come in scared to death something is wrong. It's always best to get your fears checked out, no matter what they may be.”
“Will everything be okay?”
“Yes,” She smiles at Jett. “Just as long as Maria takes it easy for a while. No stress. It is not good for the baby in any way. It's not good for Maria in her condition.”
“Don't worry,” he smiles while stroking my swollen stomach. “I'm going to take really good care of them both.”
“I don't doubt it.” She smiles.
“Can you tell us if our baby is a boy or a girl?” I hadn't intended to ask, Jett and I had already decided to wait, but I want to know. This scare has really frightened me. I just want to know my baby. I want to give them a name, call them by it each day. I refer to the baby as him in my head a lot, but I want confirmation.
“I can. That's if Daddy would like to know?” Jett looks at me and winks before turning back to the doctor and nodding. “It's a girl.” A girl. I'm having a girl! I honestly thought my baby was a boy. Shows how much I know.
A little girl!
God, we're going to be such good friends, my little girl and I. I'm going to hold her so tightly to me every day and tell her how much her mommy loves her. I want her to know that she is everything to me, to her daddy.
The second the doctor wipes the jell from my stomach, I stroke it gently. “Hello, baby girl,” I whisper. Jett kisses me softly, resting his forehead against mine. “She's okay,”
“Yes, she is. Our little Jessica.” I giggle. Jessica. We'd ch
osen that name for a girl, but I honestly didn't think we'd need it.
We chose Jessica because Jessica was my mother's middle name, and oddly, Lynette's middle name, too. It just seems right to name our sweet baby after our mother's, the women we love with all out hearts.
“Will she start moving again?”
Doctor Willson smiles at me. “Maria, Jessica hadn't stopped moving as such, she just hasn't been kicking the way you're used to. The more active you are, the less you will feel her moving. I know this has frightened you, but I promise you your little girl is just fine. Soon enough she'll be kicking away in there and driving you nuts.”
That makes Jett laugh.
I stroke my belly tenderly. “She could never drive me nuts.” I smile at Jett, his hand on my face draws my eyes to his. We're okay, Jessica is okay. I can breathe deeply and relax now.
However, somehow, I know my father isn't going to give up so easily. This time, he won't walk away from me until he's seen me and said his piece. I just have to figure out if I want to see him again.
“I'm fine, Draven,” I'm not fine, I'm a nervous wreck. The doctor let me go home, as long as I rest, she said. It was late by the time we got home, and I soon fell asleep. However, I woke soon after screaming my head off. I had a vile, violent nightmare about my father and my mother. He was screaming at her, shaking her, her eyes were wide with fear. I was hiding behind the door, looking in through the gap. He yelled something that I couldn't make out, and then she fell to the floor. Dead.
I've never had such a dream before, and it frightened me so much I had a panic attack. Jett calmed me after a while, but I could see the anguish in his eyes, and the fact I couldn't tell him what was wrong hurt him.
He held me close to him, kissing my head and making me feel safe. That's when I babbled like an idiot about my father being a bad man, a bad man who hurt me. I don't even know what I meant by that, so I couldn't very well tell Jett when he asked.
I don't even remember my father ever hurting me, but something inside of me tells me he did something terrible. Not necessarily to me, but he definitely did to my mother. I don't understand what he did, but that dream was so vivid in places. I don't know if it was real or not.
Jett held me and let me cry, shushing me and telling me that nothing and no one could hurt me, that he'll protect me. It calmed me a lot. I know my husband would never let anything bad happen to me. It was just a silly dream, jumbled up rubbish in my head due to seeing my father again after all this time.
I made Jett promise not to tell Draven or Hammer what I'd said about the dream and my father. It was all in my head, and I didn't want them making a mountain out of a molehill. He promised he wouldn't, but told me that my brother would be visiting in the morning to see how I'm doing, that he'd want to know what my father said to me in the hospital, which I didn't understand because no doubt Hammer had already told him.
Draven had returned home after I'd been released from the hospital, but he hadn't been to see me because Jett had told him that I'd fallen asleep and he didn't want to disturb me. Draven spent most of the night with Hammer, talking about what happened with my dad, our dad, and what happens next. Jett wouldn't tell me anything about it, and I didn't push for answers either.
I was only showered and dressed five minutes before Draven arrived. The second I saw him, I burst into tears and ran into his arms. He's always been there for me. He's my safety blanket. He's been holding me tightly for an age it seems.
“I've been so worried about you.” I don't say anything, just snuggle into his big, powerful chest, with my arms wrapped tightly around his back so he can't let go yet. “You sure everything's all right with the baby?”
“She's fine,” Jett answers. “The doctor said she was just lazy, but all this stress isn't good for Maria.”
“Well, then, it's up to us to make sure she isn't under any more stress.” I listen to them all talking, my husband and my big brothers, while I'm doing nothing but think about that damn dream; it seemed so real, so familiar, terribly fucking frightening.
What if my father really did kill my mom?
My beautiful mother.
My heart breaks thinking about it. However, it would make a lot of sense as to why Joseph was thrown out of the family, but it doesn't make any sense as to why he was allowed to live. The family wouldn't have let him live if he'd killed my mother like that.
The reports said she died of a heart attack, but what if that wasn't true after all?
Either way, I know deep down that my father is the reason I no longer have a mother, and I hate him for it!
I miss her every single day. She missed my wedding day because of Joseph. She's not here sharing my pregnancy with me. She won't be with me when I give birth to my daughter. She'll never get to hold her first grandchild and kiss her little head.
My baby girl will never know the beautiful person my mother was. She will never hear my mother singing a lullaby to her as she rocks her to sleep and tells her how much she is loved.
“It's okay, Maria.” My brother soothes with a kiss to my head.
“I miss her,” I whisper.
“I miss her too.” Just like always, Draven seems to know just who I'm speaking of. “She'll always be with you, Maria. She'll always be looking out for you and Jessica. She'll be with you when that little girl enters the world, and she'll be there planting a kiss on your head, telling you just how proud she is of you and how much she loves you.”
I sob. Not because I'm sad as such, but because I needed to hear those words. I needed to know my mother is still with me somehow.
Things will be okay. I'll always miss my mother, but I have two big brothers and my perfect husband looking out for me. Draven won't let Joseph near me. Because right now, I never want to see him again.
Chapter Twenty
Jett
This is fuckin' ridiculous! You're gonna off your old man?” I rake my fingers through my hair.
Shepard called this meeting with Draven Vidal in order to get to the bottom of why Joseph is trying to contact Maria again. Don't get me wrong, he hasn't gotten anywhere near her and he won't while I have breath left in my body. However, this man is talking about killing his father!
“You want to know why?” He says calmly from his seat behind his stupidly expensive desk in his office.
Office, that's a joke. It's a room at the back of his restaurant, the restaurant that is his cover for all his illegal wrongdoings. Having a legitimate business keeps the authorities at bay when needed. Not that there's a cop in town that doesn't know about the Vidal Crime Family, but who's brave enough to stop them?
“My wife has started having nightmares about that man. If you know why then you better tell me.”
He raises his eyebrow at me with a smirk on his face. He leans forward in his chair, his arms resting on the desk in front of him, his eyes trailing over my men and his, Shepard, Hammer, and Tank. I'll be fucked if I care who the hell his men are. Although, I do know them. Tony, his number one man, and Lorenzo, Maria's bodyguard. The one stipulation Draven gave me about allowing Maria and I to marry was that Lorenzo continued his position with Maria.
I could take care of her myself, but extra help, especially considering her ties to the Mafia boss, are more than welcome. A man can never have too much protection where his wife is concerned.
I don't recall the other guys' name. I don't fuckin' need to I married Draven's sister, doesn't mean I have anything to do with these immoral pricks. However, they are all here to make sure the big bad bikers don't mess up their boss. Not that the man can't take care of himself, but four against one is a lot for anyone to handle. Hammer wouldn't allow it anyway; fucker is close to the mafia prick. Attacking Draven Vidal is not what I'm here for I may not like the man much but my Maria loves him, trusts him, so does Hammer, and that's good enough for me.
“When did these nightmares start?”
“Couple days ago. The night I took her home from the hospital. Seeing him
shook her up.”
Draven scrubs his hands over his face. “What I'm about to tell you all must not leave this room. These three are my most trusted men. They know already. The only reason I'm allowing you three to stay,” he points to my men, “is because you're my brother and you have a right to know. You're part of this family now.” He looks Hammer right in the eye. They seem to have come to an understanding since Maria's scare.
“He can stay because he's your brother and Maria thinks of him as her own brother,” I notice Tank's smirk. My girl does think a lot of him and he her. “And you're my sister's father-in-law. Each one of you in this room can help me reach the goal I am aiming for. You two,” he points to Tank and Hammer, “Do not flip the fuck out until I'm finished speaking.”
“Why would we?” Tank asks.
“Hammer because Maria is his sister. Both of you because what I have to say concerns your mother.”
Tank's nostrils flare. He's pissed already.
“What about her?”
“I'll get to that, Shepard. If what I tell you leaves this room, I'll kill you all and make it look like a tragic accident. Maria cannot be reminded of what happened; it would destroy her.” We each nod in agreement.
He sits back in his seat with a sigh. “I'll start at the beginning. There's a lot. To be honest, I don't know how I never made the connection before now. I went through some of my mother's old things last night. I haven't been through even a quarter of the things I kept because I couldn't bring myself to. However, I thought it was time I so. I thought maybe, I could find something in there that Maria could give to Jessica so she'd know her grandmother in some way. I also wanted to give something to Noah and the new baby. I wanted them to know their great-aunt and how much she would have loved them." That was actually a nice idea. The smile on Hammer's face tells me the thought touched him. "What I found, I still can't get my head around.”
“What are you talking about, brother?”
Draven looks at Hammer and smiles. He likes the fact Hammer refers to him as his brother. None of us ever thought we'd see the day. “I found some letters and photographs. The letters were to my mother's sister. The pictures proved just that. I didn't even know my mother had a sister, but it seems she did. A twin sister.”
Never Give You Up (Snakes Henchmen Book 3) Page 15