“Yes . . . ma’am,” he answered. Tears crested in the corners of his eyes, but they remained there, almost as if they were afraid to fall.
Kacie slapped him across his face once, twice, three more times. “Here I am,” she said while breathing hard, “trying to go to school to make things better for the seven of y’all. I’m trying to keep a roof over your heads. Trying to keep food on the table, and as soon as I decide to go out, just for a little while, you have the nerve to let some girl do nasty things to you, talking about oral sex. You’re dumb and stupid if you think that letting a girl do that to you makes you a man. You’re nothing but a punk. You’re just like your daddy.” Kacie was off on a tangent now. “God don’t like ugly. You’re going straight to hell if you don’t get yourself together. Do you hear me?”
“Yes.” By this time, tears were pouring from Kenny’s eyes.
“If your daddy was so good like he pretends to be, he would have at least given you his last name, but did he?”
“No,” Kenny whispered.
“Did he think enough of you, his own flesh and blood, and his oldest son, to at least do that?” Kacie asked, yelling again.
“No, ma’am,” Kenny replied louder this time.
“Get up and get in there and get your stuff ready for school tomorrow. Then get those dishes washed and see about your sisters and brothers. My legs are hurting, and it’s all because of y’all. Y’all are killing me. I’m sick of it!” she cried out. “I’m sick and tired of all of y’all.”
Kacie left Kenny in the living room and she retreated to her bedroom, slamming the door closed. She fell across the bed, slammed the computer shut, and wept. Her life wasn’t supposed to be like this. She wanted so bad to be normal, to be beautiful. Why? Why did it have to be her? She hated herself at that moment. She lifted her head to reach for a box of tissues on the side table, and caught her reflection in the mirror attached to the dresser. She looked at her red, swollen eyes. She lifted her crooked legs up, one by one, and felt a wave of nausea as she saw how ugly and deformed they were. “Where is the beauty in me?” she asked the person staring at her in the mirror. “What are you looking at? You’re ugly. You’re nothing but a slut. You’re a child abuser. You will never amount to being nothing but a Section 8 hood rat.” The attacks against the woman in the mirror intensified until Kacie ran out of insults. Her head fell back down on the pillow and she buried the woman in the mirror, at least for the night.
Kacie turned over and landed on top of her laptop. She must have fallen asleep. It was close to one o’clock in the morning. The house was quiet. She left the laptop in its place, got stiffly to her feet, and went to use the bathroom. When she finished, she looked in the bottom of the vanity and searched in her bag of meds until she found her pain medicine. It was late, but she didn’t care. She didn’t care if she missed work or school tomorrow. She was sick of everything and everybody at that moment.
More than her legs hurt. Her spirit felt like it was on fire. She leaned down over the sink until her mouth and hand were under the sink’s faucet. The cold water filled her hands, which she used to swallow the strong, quick-acting pill. Back in her bedroom, she climbed underneath the covers.
“I’m sorry, God. I know I shouldn’t have hit my son. I know I shouldn’t have talked about myself like that either. But I need you to help me understand some things. I need to hear a word from you. I can’t keep on doing this. I can’t keep being like this, living like this. I need you to tell me what to do. If you don’t, I don’t think I can last. I feel like I’m about to break.”
16
Seduction isn’t making someone do what they don’t want to do.
Seduction is enticing someone into doing what they secretly want to do already.
Layla read Envy’s text. She was thrilled that Envy would be able to put her past behind her and move on with her life.
Layla planned to do the same. She met Tyreek at Precious Cargo. He told her to keep her car parked and she got in his Dodge Challenger. He drove downtown to Tom Lee Park, named after Tom Lee, an African-American river worker who single-handedly saved the lives of thirty-two passengers on the M. E. Norman Steamboat in 1925. Luxury homes and condominiums decorated the top of the bluff that overlooked the park and the river. During the spring and summer, the park was often alive and vibrant with walkers, joggers, the famous Memphis in May Barbecue Cooking Contest, and riverfront concerts. Several cars were parked along the strip to enjoy the night view, while other couples strolled along the paved two-mile parkway or cuddled on the benches lined along the park.
The night was clear so the couple could appreciate the panoramic views of the Mississippi River, and the shores of Arkansas across the water, with the lit-up M-shaped bridge connecting the two states.
Layla listened with amusement at Tyreek telling wild stories about some of the things he encountered from customers.
“You know they say that people pour out their troubles to the bartender. It’s true. One man poured out his insides all over the bar one night. I needed a drink myself after that.”
Layla burst into laughter. “I can’t take it anymore. You’re making my jaws hurt from laughing so hard.”
“I like the sound of your laughter,” Tyreek said in a serious tone. “Hey, let’s take a stroll along the river walk,” he suggested. “I know there’s a cold breeze coming off the river, but it’ll be fun. And it’ll be an excuse for you to cuddle up next to me.”
“One thing is for sure,” said Layla.
“What’s that?”
“You know how to keep a girl smiling. I like that.”
“I like you,” Tyreek replied. “Come on, button up that jacket, sweetheart, and let’s do this.”
Layla said, “I’m ready.”
Tyreek got out of the car and ran to the other side to open the door for Layla. He extended his hand toward hers and she placed her hand in his.
They strolled along the river walk, and Tyreek pulled her body close to his. She had to admit that it felt good, real good. It wasn’t the same as being out on a date with Dennis, or going to a basketball game with Omar. There was something about being with Tyreek that felt totally different.
This brother has it going on. He has to have a lady. Prob’ly has a harem. She laughed.
“Hey!” He stopped and looked at her. “Tell me.”
“Tell you what?” asked Layla.
“What you’re laughing about.”
“Oh, nothing really.”
“Oh, it was something.” He pulled her even closer to him and gave her an affectionate kiss on the cheek. “Tell me,” he insisted.
“Okay, since you’re going to whine about it.” They both laughed. “I was thinking that a guy like you, I mean you meet all types of women in your profession.”
“Yeah, and?”
“Well, you must have a lady or ladies somewhere.”
“Why?”
“Because,” she answered.
“Why would you think that? And if you do believe that, why are you here with me tonight?”
“Because I’m a free spirit. I got it like that.”
“Oh, the lady I’m standing next to definitely has it like that. You’re one fine woman. And just to be straight up with you, I don’t have a girlfriend. I’m not going to lie to you and tell you that women don’t come on to me at the bar, and sometimes I reciprocate, but it’s nothing serious. You know what I mean?”
“I hear what you’re saying. And it’s all good.”
“It’s all good?” he repeated. “Sounds to me like you’re the one who has a man. No doubt you do, because I can’t imagine a man on this earth that wouldn’t want to sport you on his arm.”
Layla allowed his compliment to sink in. She loved it when men complimented her good looks. “I do have a friend. It used to be serious, but I can’t say that I want serious anymore. I mean, look at me.”
Tyreek spoke up. “Believe me, baby girl, I’m definitely looking atcha.”
“If he’s all of that, then why are you here with me? You sound like you have a good thing at home.” They approached a bench and Tyreek led the way for the two of them to sit down.
“First let me clear things up a bit. He’s not at home, like at my home. I have my place and he has his. We’ve been friends awhile, but that’s all; we are not a couple anymore. It’s like going to work—it’s routine. He’s like a fixture in my life; that’s it. I don’t know if you understand where I’m coming from.”
“Sure, I do. I feel you. There’s been this girl that I used to want so badly. I mean, she was like someone special to me.” Tyreek laid one hand over his heart. “She could have had all of me.”
“What happened?” asked Layla.
“Turns out she didn’t want all of me; only wanted a piece of me. Whenever she calls, I’m supposed to run. I admit it, I never turned her down. When she was finished with me, you know what she would say?”
“What?” Layla’s interest was piqued.
“‘Lock the door on your way out.’”
“Wow, she sounds coldhearted.”
“Tell me about it. But all of my running to her and being used for her satisfaction, it has to stop. I can’t do it anymore. I won’t do it anymore, I should say.”
“So you’re still seeing her? Is that what I just heard?”
“Yeah, you heard right, but I’ve made a decision to put her in the past. I’ve never felt one hundred percent sure about it, until now.”
“What makes you so sure now?” asked Layla.
“You. It may sound like a line, but all I can do is speak the truth. I don’t believe in leading women on. My mother taught me better than that. She was a victim of domestic violence. I was too young to do anything about it at the time. I was just a young buck, you know. I saw her hurt too many times, not just physical abuse but mental abuse as well. She was mistreated for being a good woman, and not just once, but it seems like every man she met was on a mission to destroy the good in her, to twist the love that she had to give into something ugly and painful, until it just wore her down. I hate to say this, but I’m glad she doesn’t have a man in her life now; and she hasn’t had one that I know about since I turned eighteen. Now I’m a full-grown man, and I dare another man to step to her in any way except correct. However, seeing the way dudes treated her, I promised her and myself that I would never use a woman for my own gain, or just as a conquest. And I surely will never abuse a woman. If I see even an inkling that things could go in that direction, you better believe I’m out.”
Dennis and his parents were reasonably close, but Layla had never heard him defend his mother’s honor like Tyreek just did. Layla listened as he spoke slowly, deliberately looking in her eyes, like he was feeling his way.
“So what I’m saying to you, baby girl, is that I’m not looking for my next conquest. I don’t want to be anybody’s boy toy anymore. I’m looking for the real deal. Don’t get uncomfortable, because it’s okay if you aren’t on the same page as me. But there’s something about you that makes me believe that it’s a lot that I’m missing by not having a relationship with someone, other than a casual hit-and-run. I’d at least like us to be friends, but something tells me that you’re feeling me like I’m feeling you.”
“Uh, we just met, Tyreek, so I don’t know where all this seriousness is coming from. It’s all about having fun, not falling in . . . well, not getting all tied up with someone, you know.”
“I hear you, and I understand where you’re coming from, but I’m simply speaking from my heart. I know it’s our first time stepping out and all, but time rules its own course.”
Tyreek’s voice was like a warm fire in the chilly night, and it drew Layla to him even more.
“And, Layla,” he said, “as far as being that run-to guy, that was then, and this is now.” Tyreek leaned in and Layla met him halfway. He pressed his lips to hers. Suddenly she was uneasy with her sudden reciprocation of intimacy, but the sweet nectar of his lips made her shift closer to him. Tyreek’s kiss was full of the passion and desire she used to feel with Dennis. The more his mouth moved over hers in sensuous exploration, the further thoughts of Dennis evaporated.
Layla pulled away.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.” She nestled next to him as the cold wind embraced them like two star-crossed lovers. Her head rested on his shoulder for only a moment as his mouth once again moved over hers—this time he really kissed her.
17
The real sin against life is to abuse and destroy beauty, even one’s own—even more, one’s own—for that has been put in our care and we are responsible for its well-being.
“I had a good time,” Layla told Tyreek.
“Me too,” he said. He was distinctively handsome, slender with a powerfully built body. He leaned his long legs and taut rear end against her car.
Layla stood next to him with her arms wrapped around her waist. “Well, I better get going. It’s getting late, and I’m cold.”
Tyreek stood up straight. Layla watched as he moved toward her like a sleek panther. He moved in front of her, unfolded her arms, and caught her at the waist with both hands to bring her in next to him. She rested against his chest. Layla studied his strong jawline, while she used her gloved hands to examine the bulging muscles of his arms through his wool bomber jacket.
Tyreek’s phone started vibrating against Layla’s side.
“Aren’t you going to answer that?”
“Nope.”
“She may be calling you. I wouldn’t want to get you in trouble.”
“I told you. I’m done with all of that. Let me handle my business, okay?” He spoke to Layla with such sincerity.
“Okay,” she answered.
Tyreek’s voice slowly trailed away. “I’m here, right where I want to be.” He kissed her on the forehead and then allowed his thick, soft lips to travel the length of her neck, from the side to the front, until his lips meshed with hers.
Layla gasped as his tongue invaded her mouth. “This isn’t right.”
“Oh, it’s right,” he told her without releasing her mouth from his.
~
Envy couldn’t sleep; she tossed and turned in bed. She clicked from channel to channel, not really searching for any one program over the other. It was one-thirty in the morning and she hadn’t heard from Layla or Tyreek. She was curious to know how far he would try to take things with Layla. She didn’t want to raise a stink about them, because that would make Tyreek think she had feelings for him. But the fact remained that he was her boy toy. She would never knowingly play second to any female, and definitely not Layla. As for Layla, no way was Envy going to step to her about Tyreek. Envy had to maintain her privacy, but that didn’t mean that she was going to roll over and play dead.
Layla’s phone was still going straight to voice mail, and Tyreek’s phone rang a couple of times before it went to voice mail.
“I know one thing, he better not be in bed with her. It doesn’t matter whether he knows she’s my friend or not.”
Her mind began to play out the best way to exact vengeance. Envy dialed the number without giving it a moment’s thought.
“Hello,” the man answered. The groggy sound of his voice told Envy that he must have been asleep.
“Oh, Dennis,” Envy said with an innocent edge to her voice. “I’m sorry to wake you. I’ve been trying to reach Layla, but her phone keeps going to voice mail. I know it’s late, but this is important. Do you mind waking her up? Tell her I need t
o talk to her.”
Dennis suddenly sounded awake. “Layla isn’t over here. From the last discussion we had, this is the last place she would be. She’s probably at home in deep sleep and doesn’t hear the phone, or maybe she’s out living it up. Who knows?”
She heard a ruffling sound in the background. Dennis must have been sitting up in the bed, she imagined. “What are you talking about? Did the two of you have an argument or something?”
“That’s putting it mildly. Anyway, she’s not here.”
“Dennis, I didn’t mean to call and start problems. I assumed when she said she was going to be unavailable tonight that she was going to be with you. I had no idea y’all were having issues. Anyway, I’m going to let you get back to sleep. And, Dennis?”
“Yea?” he responded dryly.
“If you don’t mind, can you keep this between us? I wouldn’t want Layla to think that I was trying to stir up trouble.”
“There’s nothing to keep secret. Anyway, if there’s trouble stirring, it’s because she already put a pot on the burner.”
“Look, try to get back to sleep. Sorry about waking you up. G’night, Dennis.”
“Apology accepted. Good night,” he replied and the call ended.
“You’re going to learn not to mess with me, Tyreek.” Envy paced back and forth in her apartment as Fischer followed her with his eyes. “And, Miss Layla, you’re way out of your league, sweetheart. I don’t care how close we are—all is fair in love and war. And since I don’t do the love thing, you don’t know it yet, but I just declared war.”
~
Tyreek gave Layla one last lingering kiss before she got in her car and drove home with thoughts of the evening she’d spent with him replaying in her mind. He was everything Dennis wasn’t; she could tell that much already.
Dennis had never been the romantic type. He was simply a nice, quiet, reserved man. His personality and caring heart were what made her fall quickly in love with him. But things had changed for her. After experiencing what it truly meant to live life, Layla was sure that the love she had for Dennis was gone.
True Beauty Page 14