by Margaret Kay
“Better than I think most would,” Sherman said. “She’s a perfect fit.”
“It’s an adjustment, suddenly having a woman live with you. No longer being an I and suddenly being a we, is a lot to take in. I can attest to that.”
“I’m sure the reality of it will hit me more when we go back to my place, even more so when Bobby is out of rehab and joins us.”
“You’re pretty relaxed about taking on two dependents.”
“Family, it’s all about family. I’ve got enough money put away, so it won’t break me,” Sherman said. “I do need to get a bigger place though. My place is too small for three people.”
Sloan shook his head.
“What?” Sherman asked.
“Just like that?”
“Yeah, it’s the right thing to do, for Bobby, for Brielle, hell, for me too. I don’t have to tell you what it’s like to have a woman you know is yours. I love going to sleep holding her and love it even more that I wake up to her too.”
Sloan nodded. “Yeah, I got that the very first mission we went away on after Kaylee was living with me. I sure as hell missed her while we were gone and when we came home, it was like something I never knew was lacking in my life was suddenly there.”
Sherman understood what he meant. He’d never wanted that with any woman, did everything he could to avoid it, but he craved it with Brielle. “Brielle is special. She just fits.”
Sloan smiled. “I’m happy for you. We need to get her and Kaylee together soon.”
“I need to get Brielle hooked up with the other girls too. I’m glad she and Angel are spending time together so they can get to know each other.” He knew that Angel was the mamma bear not only to all of them, but to the other wives too. As far as he could see, the wives were all tight. He wanted Brielle to be included in that group. She’d need the support when he went back on active duty.
In the kitchen on the fifth floor, Brielle sipped her tea. Her laptop was in front of her. She wanted to proof her article one more time before she sent it to Shepherd, but she was enjoying getting to know Angel. She was a warm and genuine person. She understood why Brian had such an affection for her.
Angel’s phone, which sat on the table, vibrated. Angel checked her text message. “Gary just gave Brian more pain killers. He suggests you hang out here for a while and let Brian rest.” She nodded to Brielle’s laptop. “Did you finish your article?”
“Yes, last night. I need to proof it one more time before I send it to Mr. Shepherd.” She was a bit surprised. She didn’t know that Angel knew anything about the article. She guessed that since Angel did, she probably knew about the NDA she’d been forced to sign too.
Angel stood. “I should probably leave you to it then. I know Shepherd is anxious to get it.”
“No, please stay and talk a little while longer. I’m not ready to send it yet.” She knew once she did, her path would be cemented.
Angel smiled and retook her seat. “This is a special group of people. Wait till you meet the other wives. We all support each other, especially when the guys are away on a mission.”
“I met Kaylee. She seems really nice.” Brielle smiled. “She and Gary are really cute together.”
“Yes, they are. I’ve never seen Gary happier.” Angel was thoughtful for a few moments. “It’s not easy though, being with a man that does what our men do. You’ve seen firsthand how bad it can go with little warning.”
“Yes,” Brielle agreed. “It was really scary, seeing him get shot.”
“Yes, it’s something that doesn’t easily get out of your head. Make sure you reach out to Dr. Lassiter if you need to. He can help.”
“Why do I get the feeling you know that firsthand?”
Angel frowned. “Because I do. I was with Shepherd when he was shot. It was horrible. It was a blur. The team swarmed in from nowhere, saving us both. The gunfire was so loud, deafening. I watched Doc and Gary work on him. There was so much blood. He almost didn’t make it.”
Brielle stared at her in disbelief. “I had no idea.”
“He was protecting me, but they got us,” Angel said. “I had a normal life, didn’t do anything wrong, but life took a horrible turn for me.”
Brielle shook her head. “I’m sorry. Brian didn’t tell me. I didn’t know.”
“No, I’m sure he didn’t. We all have our stories, and I know the guys would never tell anyone what’s ours to share. You can be confident in that, that no one will share your story, not even with their wives. I only know your story because I see all mission reports.” She paused. “I can’t wait to read your article.”
“It will be heavily censored in what I am allowed to report on.”
“There is a good reason for that,” Angel said. “This organization wouldn’t accomplish a fraction of what we do if we had to color inside the lines. Operating the way we do, is the only reason we accomplish what other units can’t. And a lot of people are alive because of that.”
Brielle nodded, believing her. After a few silent minutes, Angel excused herself.
Sierra
Brielle hit send and closed the lid to her laptop. Her news article was sent. She felt good about it, even though she knew only a few people would ever read it. She stood and carried her laptop with her back to Angel’s desk, exiting the kitchen with purpose.
“I sent Shepherd the article I wrote. I expect he’ll be calling me into his office shortly.”
Angel glanced up from her monitor. “That doesn’t sound very promising.”
Brielle’s lips curved into a sad smile. “In life you make choices and hope for the best. Hindsight is twenty-twenty. I can only hope in hindsight I’ll see that this was a good choice.”
“What did you do, Brielle?” Angel asked.
“I wrote the very best article I could about what went down on the Bayou Lafourche.”
She stood there by Angel’s desk and waited, making small talk with her. Sure enough, ten minutes later, Angel’s phone rang. Shepherd.
“Yes, Brielle is right here with me.” Angel’s eyes flickered to her. “I’ll send her right in.”
Brielle forced a smile. “Thanks, Angel.”
“Good luck,” Angel said to Brielle’s back as she walked down the hall towards Shepherd’s office.
The door was closed when Brielle reached it. She knocked.
“Come,” Shepherd’s voice came from behind the door.
She took a deep breath and opened it. She stepped in.
“Close it,” Shepherd said, the two words clipped. He sat behind his big desk in the corner of the floor to ceiling windows. He motioned to the guest chairs in front of his desk.
She crossed the room and perched on the edge of the chair. This man still intimidated her. She didn’t think anything would ever change that, not even the knowledge that he was human and had nearly died in front of Angel.
Shepherd shook his head. “I don’t understand. You had to know I’d never okay this article.”
“It’s not meant for anyone’s eyes but yours. I wrote the story that mattered. The story of a group of brave men and women, who no one knows about, who no one will ever know about. A group who do an important job and never take the credit for their courageous and valiant acts. They put their lives on the line, get shot,” her eyes flashed to his wheelchair, “get paralyzed protecting other people. They’re the story, not the drug dealers pretending to do cancer research in the bayou.”
“I still don’t understand. You have the exclusive on the takedown at the BioDynamix facility, the arrests of the corrupt Sheriff and his deputy. Why aren’t you writing the story?”
“Mr. Shepherd, your team is the story, a story that I know can never be told, but I wanted you to know what I saw, what I experienced.” She paused and opened her laptop. She read from her text. “This group, Shepherd Security, is the front line between us and the evil that threaten the civilized, the law abiding, the ordinary citizens who don’t know vile people exist in the world. These o
utlaws are merciless, corrupt, have no value for human life. The members of Shepherd Security equalize the playing field to protect the unknowing, the innocent. They go in armed to the teeth to meet those who threaten the weak on a level playing field.” She glanced up from her laptop. “This reporter wouldn’t be here right now if it was not for the job these fearless men and women do, expecting no recognition, no thanks. Well, this reporter says thank you.”
Shepherd gazed at her, a confused look on his face. “You have the exclusive on the DEA takedown of that plant. This story can make your journalism career take off.”
“No longer interested,” Brielle said with tears coming to her eyes. “I can’t have that job, that life, and still have Brian. Believe me, sir, I have always dreamt of being a reporter, of travel, of writing articles that matter. But I’d never see Brian then. Between that schedule and his, we wouldn’t last. He’s more important to me than anything.”
Shepherd nodded stiffly. “I will share this article up the chain of command, if that’s all right with you. There are people in D.C. who will appreciate this piece. And it never hurts to toot our own horns when I’m looking for additional funding.”
“It’s yours. Do with it what you like,” Brielle said.
“Thank you, Ms. Jarboe,” Shepherd said in a dismissive tone.
Brielle rose and left, closing the door behind her. She walked half-way down the hallway before she allowed the tears to roll down her cheeks. Inside, she felt a crushing loss, but she knew it would feel worse to lose Brian. And he didn’t even know what she had done. She pulled her phone from her back pocket and dialed Dr. Lassiter. She was grateful he answered on the second ring.
“I need to talk with you,” she said.
“Are you crying, Brielle?” Lassiter asked.
She wiped the tears. “Yep, that’s exactly what I’m doing.”
“Are you still in the building?”
She nodded her head, like Dr. Lassiter could see her!
“Come right to my office,” he said. “It’s down on the fourth floor through the public access.”
“Okay,” she murmured.
She exited out of the inner office area into the outer office by Angel and left the suite without saying a word to her. She took the public stairs down one flight to the fourth floor. Joe Lassiter stood at the door to his inner office when she entered his suite.
He held his arms open to her, and she immediately went into them. She sobbed.
“Brielle, what is it?” He led her into his office and sat beside her on the couch.
She told him of her decision and the article she wrote.
“Does Brian know?” Lassiter asked.
Brielle shook her head no. “He is confident we could make it work, but I know we can’t if we’re not together as much as his job will allow.”
“He wouldn’t want you to sacrifice your happiness for him,” Lassiter said. “This is a decision you should have made together. There is no I in we, Brielle.”
“I love him, Dr. Lassiter. He’s more important to me than anything else.”
“Then why the tears?”
“Because now, I have no idea what I’m going to do. Ever since college, all I focused on was what it would take for me to get a job in the big leagues of journalism. I have no other dreams.”
“You feel lost?” Lassiter said.
She nodded.
“Give yourself some time for your new dream to take shape. What you are feeling right now is loss because you have no focus, no driving force behind your being. Your new goals will take shape. You just need to give it some time.” Plus, he knew that the events of the past week had taken an emotional toll on her. She needed some time to decompress.
Brielle wiped her tears. “I’m sure you’re right. This has just been a really emotional time. It was so scary seeing Brian shot.”
Lassiter nodded. He knew it would have been. Her previous bravado, he was sure, was either a front or her not facing what she felt. No one could see someone they care about shot and not have it phase them. “I’m sure it was. How did you sleep last night?”
“I had a hard time falling asleep. Every time I was close to drifting off, I saw it again, the moment Brian was shot.”
“That’s perfectly normal. The more you talk about your feelings, the faster that loop will stop playing.”
“It just still all seems surreal, him being shot, watching Gary and Doc work on him, all the blood.”
“And when you could see that he was okay?”
“It was a relief, but it didn’t make it any less surreal.”
“The reality of what you’ve signed up for by being with him probably hasn’t completely dawned on you yet, either.”
Brielle shrugged. “Angel told me she was with Mr. Shepherd when he was shot, that something happened to her. I didn’t ask what because honestly, I don’t think I could have handled knowing right now.”
She was quiet for a few moments. Lassiter let her be with her thoughts. He knew she had to decide to share her feelings without prompting from him, and he wanted to see where they would go on their own.
“I guess I’ve always known that there are evil people in the world, but I’ve never been around them. Knowing what Sheriff Henderson was capable of,” she paused and shook her head, a deep frown cutting across her face. “He brought me and Toby to that plant, knowing we would be killed. Toby is an innocent two-year-old boy? Who could do that?”
“And you too. Don’t underestimate how jarring it is to know that someone would have been okay causing your death,” Lassiter said.
Brielle nodded. “I’ve tried not to think about that.”
“That’s the wrong approach. You need to think about it, need to talk about it. That’s what I’m here for. You need to face it. Brielle,” he said, taking her hand in his. “You’re human and human emotions come with that. Also, you could have lost Brian, and you witnessed a military operation that few others are ever a part of. It’s sobering seeing all that.”
“Yeah, it was. You know, I spent time with those people, but seeing them in action was shocking. I was really intimidated by all of them at first. But after I talked with them and got to know them, I saw them as regular people, but they’re not. Even Madison, seeing her with that assault rifle shooting those men in the BioDynamix plant,” she paused and shook her head again. “She didn’t even hesitate.”
“No, she wouldn’t. She’s an experienced professional who knows the enemy won’t hesitate, so she can’t either. If she were to, either she or one of her teammates would be dead.”
“How does a person get on with living a normal life with this knowledge?”
Lassiter smiled. “With a lot of gratitude that there are people out there, like those who work for Shepherd Security.”
Brielle’s lips curved into a smile. “I know you’re right. Maybe I just need a little more time.”
“I’m sure you do. And you need to give yourself that time. None of this is anything you need to figure out today.”
“Thank you, Dr. Lassiter. I know.”
“But over the next month or so, it’s stuff we need to talk about, until you can honestly say that you’re okay living with the knowledge you have and living with the danger that Sherman will be in every day when he goes to work.”
Brielle glanced away, unable to maintain eye contact with Dr. Lassiter while she considered that. “And if I can’t, Brian and I don’t stand a chance.”
A small grin curved Lassiter’s lips. “It’s my job to make sure you can. I’ve got you, Brielle.”
She returned her gaze to him. “Thank you.”
Lassiter nodded. “You are welcome. I’m here for you both. Even though Sherman assures me he’s okay with being shot again, I know that isn’t the case. I’ll work with him a lot, sometimes meeting with the two of you together. Just remember it’s a process, recovering from what the two of you have been through.”
“I will,” she promised him.
When she left Dr. Lassiter’s office, she returned to Angel’s desk. “Do you have a few minutes?”
“Sure,” Angel said with a smile. “Sammy is just getting up from his nap. I’m very lucky that I get to have him here at work. Let me just grab him and we can have another cup of tea while I give him a snack. He usually wakes up hungry.”
Brielle went back into the kitchen. She realized she’d left her laptop in Dr. Lassiter’s office. She brewed the two cups of tea while she waited for Angel, and she sent Lassiter a text message about her laptop. He guaranteed he’d get it to her within a few hours.