by Jaymin Eve
I expected him to lead me back the way we entered, because that’s where the other pods were. But he didn’t. He veered to the right, wrapping an arm around me as he dragged me into a nearby room. The door whooshed closed behind us, and when my head stopped spinning, I let out a gasp. The entire far wall of this particular room looked to be made of glass. Just the thinnest of barriers separated us from the water outside.
“This pod,” I said, breathless. “I want one just like this.”
I pressed my hand against the glass, lost as I stared out at the water world. After some time I realized Xander had remained back near the door, one leg propped up against it. “Weren’t we supposed to be looking at pods?” I reminded him.
He straightened, and my stupid heart skipped a beat. “You lied to me outside,” he said, voice low and rumbly. “I need you to tell me exactly what’s wrong. I can’t fix the problem if I don’t know what it is.”
“Why do you even care?” I shot back, and for a moment it almost looked like that hurt him.
“Just tell me what it is, Avalon,” he said, ignoring my childish jibe.
I swallowed hard. “I’m … I don’t think we should continue our agreement. It just feels…. We’re already in really close proximity and it’s going to get messy.”
Half of me expected him to flip out. Or, more truthfully, hoped he would because that would mean he cared. Instead he looked contemplative, taking a step closer to me. “Why do you want to end it so quickly? I’m free for many more years. We don’t have to put a short expiration date on it.”
Years. The thought of having Xander for years was like a dream come true.
“What if I care more than you?” I murmured. “I’m not sure I have enough Royale in me to let go, even after a few years. And the longer it goes on, the more it will hurt me when we separate. I just can’t do pain anymore.”
His hand wrapped around the back of my head and he applied pressure, pulling me forward until our bodies were touching. “I won’t hurt you,” he said seriously. “I will treat you right.”
“But you don’t want me forever.”
The moment the words were out, I wished I could take them back. Xander stilled, the heat flaring in his eyes, slowly morphing into something dark. “I can’t.” His expression was heavy. “And you shouldn’t want to be in my world.” His hand fell back to his side. “My life is ruled by politics. My sister … she’s a prisoner to a piece of shit caramina because of politics.”
“Why?” I asked.
Xander ran a hand through his hair, stepping around me, finally moving closer to the glass. “There’s a monster that lurks in the deep, one of the only beasts in our water that does not respond to the command of the overlord. We can’t control it. Donovan, he grew up in the same waters, and he keeps it under control for us. In return…”
“He got Dawn as a mate.”
Xander slammed his hand against the glass, shaking it. “Yes. And he’s a domineering, violent bastard. I found out recently that he hits her when she won’t do what he wants. She kept it from me because if I kill him, the beast will come and attack us all.”
He swung his head to meet my gaze. “I’m almost ready to take our chances with it.”
Donovan’s vibe made a lot of sense now. Assholes always had to asshole. It was in their DNA. “We have to help her.” Just the thought of his gentle sister being hurt was enough to have my hands clenching.
Xander let out another frustrated sound. “I’ve been trying to figure out what I can do. I literally found out right before we left to find you. There’s been no time, but he’s hurting her.”
“Tell your parents,” I suggested.
Xander let out a bitter laugh. “Dawn made me promise I wouldn’t, because she knows there is nothing they can do. Politics tie their hands. Politics rules our world. Forced to go to school on Earth. Forced to mate. This is the life of overlord children.”
It all made sense then. Every single thing clicked into place and I understood.
Xander had always confused me, because he’d said one thing, but the way he touched me suggested another. “You’ve been warning me off because your mother would never allow our bond, right? You’re not free to choose your own mate.”
Xander closed his eyes for a brief moment, and I had my answer.
“I’m betrothed to a caramina already, one from a very influential family. They control the shell mines to the north seas. This is where we get a lot of our structural material for the pods.”
Somehow I managed to control my reactions to his answer, even though the thought of him being with another woman, touching her the way he had me, made me want to go out and find her so I could rip every strand of hair from her head while repeatedly punching her in the face.
The poor chick probably wasn’t even at fault. No doubt she was being forced into this as well.
“Guess that’s why your mom was such a cold bitch to me,” I said with a harsh laugh. “No doubt this bond between secret keepers and overlords has her a little worried.”
Xander captured my hand. “I don’t care what my parents want, but I have to think of my people. They need change, and my mom is not going to be the one to bring that about. If I walk away from her control now, I walk away from my future as the ruler.”
“I would never ask you to do that,” I said sadly. It was too much to take away the very thing that made Xander who he was. He’d resent me one day for sure.
He reached up to cup my chin, brushing a finger across my cheek. “I’ve bargained for a few more years of freedom. I can offer you that much.”
A single tear escaped from my eye. I lowered my head so I could wipe it away without him seeing. “It’s not enough for me,” I murmured when I had my emotions under control. “I’m sorry, but … I deserve more than that. I’m not going to be the mistress while you wait for the wife.”
Xander shook his head, a rough, angry movement. “It’s not like that. This is why I tried to stay away from you, why I told everyone from the start that I was not the Daelighter for you.”
“So why are you doing this?” I asked. “Why even start anything with me under the pretense of it being a casual fling?”
He didn’t answer straight away, and I was pretty sure that was the end of the conversation. I turned to move toward the door, done with this heartbreaking moment. Xander wasn’t free to be with me, not ever. At least I could comfort myself with the fact that I’d found out now, and not years down the track. I’d only known him a short amount of time. My heart was surely strong enough to recover from one afternoon with him.
Right?
“Because you’re perfect,” he said, voice low and vibrating with emotion. I paused, desperate for him to say more. “I thought I was strong enough to resist you, but … there was no way.” His voice got louder as he moved closer. “I hoped we could have a casual relationship and eventually I’d get you out of my system.”
His heat pressed along my spine and I fought the urge to lean back into him.
“But … one afternoon with you is not even close to being enough. I want so much more … I crave you.”
I squeezed my eyes tightly closed, biting my lips to stop the tears from pouring free. “Why do you call me Avalon?” I asked, because that random question was the only thing I could think of in that moment that wouldn’t make me cry.
His breath brushed across my neck. “You don’t know this, but an avalon is a revered animal in Royale. Your parents must have learned about them here, or otherwise it’s a huge coincidence. This creature is rare and is considered the most beautiful of all. When I first heard your name, it struck me that you are as rare and incredibly breathtaking as our avalons. You’ll always be Avalon to me.”
So much for that question keeping the tears at bay. Hot streams ran down my cheeks, and we both stayed in that position for many aching minutes. “We have to get back,” he murmured. “My mother will come looking for us soon.”
In that moment I hated Le
ttie, overlord of House of Royale.
She might not know it, but she had crushed one of my dreams—it turned out that the home I had been searching for was not a place at all … it was a person.
And he was out of my reach.
Chapter 17
I tried not to kill Lettie with my gaze when we returned to the main room. Emma, Callie, and Maya all shot me worried looks, and when I met their eyes, the concern in their faces only increased. I guessed I wasn’t doing a very good job of hiding my feelings.
I was stronger than this though. I didn’t need Xander or his family. The girls were mine, and I counted myself lucky to have them. I crossed to the other side of the room, settling next to Callie.
“You okay?” she whispered to me.
I gave a quick head shake, but when she opened her mouth to ask more, I shook my head again. It was too soon for me to talk about it. I just wanted to focus on the plan.
“We’re heading out now,” Lexen said, stepping away from the Royale overlords. “Tristall tells me that the stream we’re searching for is just beyond this village. Overlords live closest to the energy. That stream is their connection to the network.”
“Great,” I told him. “Let’s get this show on the road. I have a life to get back to.”
Fuck. I was being a bitch because my heart ached. My soul hurt. My mind was tired.
I was tired.
“Sorry,” I mumbled. “Just impatient to figure out where this stone is.”
“We understand,” Emma soothed.
They definitely understood, only they were all waiting to enjoy their eternity of being all loved up with their mates. I was just waiting to be alone in my waters again. But, before that happened, I was ready to take Laous down. I might not be getting the fairy-tale ending, but I would make sure all my friends did. I’d be satisfied if that happened.
Xander was somber when he joined us, and it hurt me to see the pain in his expression. At least I would still have my freedom after this, while his life would forever be one of duty. I hated that for him. We both deserved more.
“My father is opening the portal for us,” he said, his right hand casually sliding into his pocket. “Are you all ready to dive back into the legreto?”
Everyone nodded.
“Let’s go, then.” Xander turned, striding away without looking back. I fell in behind the others, following them out of the huge living area and into another long hallway. This one was darker.
“Where did Dawn go?” I whispered to Maya, who was just in front of me.
Her long dark hair whipped around as she tilted her head toward me. “She had to go home. To Donovan.”
My teeth clinked together and I ground them. She’d said she only had an hour, and from what Xander told me, any disobedience….
I refused to even think about it. Unfortunately, Xander’s sister didn’t have the same option.
There had to be a way to help her, I might not be able to fix my situation, but someone had to fix hers. Surely having parents as powerful as hers…. It was better if they knew. Maybe this one time, politics would not win.
I would have told them right then and there, but I was scared that I might make the situation even worse for her. But I would not forget her need. Sooner or later, something had to change for her.
“Avalon….”
The way he said my name brought me back to reality. I stumbled forward, realizing everyone else had gone. Xander had come back for me. “I need to put the breathing chamber around your face again,” he said, watching me closely.
“Oh, right.” I stepped closer to him. “I was just thinking … about Dawn.”
That fire flared in his eyes again. “She’s never far from my mind lately. I’m going to exhaust every political channel I can to help her, and if all of that fails, well … I might just have to take my chances with the beast.”
“Your parents have to be able to do something!”
Xander shook his head. “Dawn thinks she’s strong enough to handle it and has made it very clear to me that she doesn’t want anyone choosing between protecting her and protecting our people. The only reason I know is because I randomly stopped by her pod. She thought I was on Earth.”
“Please tell me you smacked him in the mouth,” I said harshly.
A wry grin tipped up one corner of Xander’s lips. “Broke his nose and fractured his jaw in three places. He couldn’t eat or speak for weeks, even with accelerated healing.” Xander let out a dark laugh. “I was worried at first that he’d take it out on Dawn, but she said he barely even cared. Violence means nothing to him, it’s just a normal way of life. He believes that his strength gives him the right to control my sister, to use that against her. And because Dawn is refusing my help, I’m in a shitty position. I don’t want to be as bad as him, taking her choices away from her—she’s one of the strongest caraminas I know—but she shouldn’t have to handle this on her own.”
“I’ll help you.” The words burst from me, filled with fire and conviction. Just like Xander, I couldn’t let this go. “Let’s deal with the secret keeper stuff first, then we’ll figure out what to do for Dawn.”
Xander captured my hand. “It’s nice to have someone other than my brothers at my back.”
I knew he meant the overlords. They were so important to Xander, and it was nice to be grouped with them. Even though I wanted to be so much more.
“Despite everything, I’m always here for you, Xander,” I said honestly. “We’ll always be friends, have a bond. No one can take that away from us.”
He cupped my face. Our eyes met and held for many long seconds before the bubble formed around my head, cutting him off from view.
When my vision was fully obscured, I allowed a single tear to trail down my cheek before I sucked in some deep breaths and got myself under control. Xander led me until we were back in the water.
The world on this side of the overlord pod was colorful, like it had been built on the edge of a reef. There was an abundance of brightly colored creatures as well, and I could imagine swimming through this area for hours. In fact, there were a lot of Royales doing just that as we moved past. They all saluted Xander before going back to their frolicking. I noticed that not all of them used their tails; there were plenty of legs around, kicking in lazy motions.
Callie let out a huge sigh that drew my attention. “I swam with them,” she said, “Best. Day. Ever!”
I laughed, because she wasn’t usually the chirpy and cute type.
“The stream is this way.” Xander said, moving to the front of the group. “You’ll know it when you see it.”
We sure as hell did.
“Oh my God,” I breathed.
My eyes were watering again, and this time it had nothing to do with Xander. This was pure emotion; the beauty before me almost hurt my eyes. The stream ran like a rainbow through the water, swishing and turning, the colors so vibrant that I felt as if I could run my hands through them and they’d be stained in bright hues.
“Xander, why have you never brought us here?” Chase asked. He sounded as awed as I felt. I was sensing that House of Leights, with their tree gods, might be into the more spiritual side of life.
“Because it’s sacred, and we are not allowed here except with express permission from the overlord,” Xander told him.
No one argued. When a firm hand pressed against my spine, ushering me forward, I sucked in a deep breath. “What should I do?” I whispered.
Xander’s palm was warm as it caressed my back. “Go,” he whispered. “Swim. The legretos mix perfectly here, and the colors are brightest right in this spot. This is where you were born.”
There was no way in hell they got my mother under here without some sort of hardcore drugs. She was not big on sacrifice, that was for sure. I guessed duty forced her hand. No wonder she was so ready to bail on me when I was old enough to look after myself.
My stomach started to roll as I moved forward, gliding because I didn’t want to kick
and disturb the amazing rainbow. I gave myself a quick pep talk. “It’s going to be fine, Ava. You got this. It’s just rainbow water, and you need this map to save the world. You’ve always wanted to save the world, remember. Like … a masked vigilante.”
“You’re going to be fine, Avalon.”
I snapped back to reality, letting out a groan as I realized they’d all heard me. I’d totally forgotten about that. “Right, I know that.”
One day I’d stop making a fool of myself in front of people I cared about.
The brightness started to overwhelm me when I got closer. I shut my eyes for a moment, moving toward the sacred waters.
I didn’t expect it to feel different, but it was icy cold, shocking me enough that my eyelids flew open. A kaleidoscope of bright colors filled my vision, and it took longer than I expected for my eyes to adjust. Reaching down, I lifted my shirt up to find just my normal tanned skin.
“Lift it higher, Ava!” Emma shouted, and I winced as her voice echoed around my bubble. I wasn’t the only one, either. “Oh, sorry,” she said at a much lower decibel. “I just thought I saw something on Ava’s back.”
Turning, I kept my back to them while I lifted my shirt all the way up and over my head. “Anything?” I asked.
There was an extended pause, and I was just pulling my shirt down again, planning to turn and make sure they hadn’t all been eaten by a meglam, when a warm body pressed against my spine, the heat very noticeable against the chill of the waters. “I got you, Avalon,” he whispered. And for that instant in time, I let myself believe that he did.
“What does the map look like?” I asked him.
His hand traced across my back, almost reverently. “There isn’t a map. It’s a circle of eight figures, and there are coordinates right in the center. Spread across the center of your back.”
“Eight,” Maya repeated. “That’s the eight of us. We’re joined, and only together will we find the stone. That’s what it means, right?”