by Sindee Lynn
Not for the first time he wondered who could have done this to such a beautiful woman. Who could have intentionally taken her feelings and cast them away only to leave these insecurities and doubts of her beauty. He moved to the step where Connie sat and pulled her into his arms. His heart ached for the obvious pain she’d experienced at the hands of others and their callous treatment of her heart.
“Connie, I hate that you’ve been hurt so badly in the past. I wish I could do something to take it all away. But I can’t. All I can do is show you how good it can be for us. All I’m asking is for you to have faith in what we could have.”
“For you to have faith in me,” he added silently.
“Kenny, I don’t know if I can,” she answered. “Everything I’ve ever known has told me you and I can’t work.”
Kenny felt her arms move around his waist to hold him closer to her body.
“I don’t know about you, but I make my own decisions about who I want to be with. And if you want to be with me, Connie, then you will have to take that big leap of faith. I promise I will be there to catch you.”
With one last squeeze, a gentle kiss placed on her soft lips, Kenny released her and got up from the steps.
“The decision is yours, Connie. What do you say?” he asked, holding his hand out for her to take it.
With all his heart Kenny wanted her to reach out for him. The last slivers of his ego refused to allow him to beg her further. He’d already come after her when she’d run. She had to make this decision on her own. Either she wanted him enough to take a chance on forging a new path or she didn’t.
When tear filled eyes lifted to his, he knew he had his answer. He allowed his hand to drop to his side and moved towards the door. She’d been through a lot in her past, and he could accept that she wasn’t ready yet. He didn’t know if she would ever be ready, but he had to believe she would be. He’d gone through a lot of women to find her, and he wouldn't let her go now.
He turned back to her, his hand on the knob.
“Don’t think this is over. I’m used to getting what I want. And let there be no doubt that what I want is you in my bed and by my side.”
Kenny gave her one of his sexiest smiles before opening the door and closing it softly behind him. He stood on the small porch listening to the soft sobs from the other side. He could still see her sitting there, misery clearly written on her face and tears streaming down her cheeks. He longed to go back inside and hold her tight, promising everything would be alright. But he couldn't. She’d made her decision, and he would allow her to stew in it for a while.
He reluctantly left and headed for his car. His steps were surprisingly light for a guy who for all intents and purposes had been dumped for the second time in as many weeks. But not for long. He’d seen the longing in Connie's eyes when she’d looked at him. He’d give her a reprieve for today because he loved her. But after that all bets were off. It would be a full on attack because he loved her. He’d always wanted to play the role of knight in shining armor. He just never guessed his damsel in distress would need saving from herself.
Chapter 23
Connie hated to go downstairs, but she couldn't continue to hide out in her room forever. Besides she had to work tonight. She’d agreed to come in a little earlier, so the guy on duty, Paul, could leave. It wasn’t like she had anything else to do on a Saturday night.
She pushed herself up from the side of the bed where she’d been sitting staring off into nothing for the past thirty minutes. Doubts over her decision weighed heavy on her tense shoulders. Had she done the right thing? Could she and Kenny have worked out had she just given them a chance? They’d done okay for the week they’d been together.
“Oh, well. What’s done is done now. After this morning I won’t have to worry about it,” she said to the empty room.
It was how her life was going to be now that she’d kicked him out of it. She didn’t want anyone else. She couldn't begin to think anyone would ever be able to take his place.
Connie left her room moving slowly down the steps. At the bottom she saw her friends getting ready to go out. Great. She should have waited just a little longer before coming down.
“Hey, Con. You okay?” Tracy asked, concern in her voice and on her face.
“Yep,” she answered simply, moving to get a jacket from the coat closet.
The store had a tendency to be a little chilly overnight.
“You wouldn't be lying to us would you,” Jamie questioned, a look of disbelief in her eyes.
“Nope,” she replied.
“You got anything more than one word answers?” Tracy asked, leaning against the door looking at her.
Connie thought on this for a moment and shook her head. She didn’t feel like talking. They were lucky they got anything at all.
“Look, Con, we don’t know exactly what happened between you and Kenny, but by all accounts, it doesn’t look like we need to go kick his ass. Are we right on that?” Tammy asked.
Misery over her own actions threatened to bring on another onslaught of tears. With a lowered head, all she could manage was a small nod of acknowledgement. No, the fault of this all fell on her already slumped shoulders.
“So what you’re telling us is that it was you? You let an absolutely great guy, from the little we know about him, just walk out of your life?” Jamie asked.
That was almost laughable. No, she hadn't just let him walk out of her life. She’d kicked him out. The tears she thought had stopped came back to clog her throat. So she merely nodded. Her heart ached anew, and all she wanted to do was go back upstairs and crawl in bed.
“Why, Connie? He seemed to really like you,” Jamie questioned, confusion was written all over her face.
“I don’t wanna talk about it,” she managed.
She struggled to hold back the tears. Couldn't they understand? Didn’t they know? It wasn’t as if they hadn't been right there with her when all of her other “walks on the other side” had backfired. She shouldn't have to explain this to them.
“Don’t you think you deserve to have somebody special in your life?” Tammy asked.
“I don’t wanna talk about it,” she repeated.
She closed the closet door with a slam. Shock registered on her friends faces.
“Look, guys, let’s go. Connie will talk to us when she’s ready,” Tracy said, looking at her closely.
“I gotta get to work. I’ll see you guys in the morning.”
That said, she quickly left the house. In the car, she allowed the tears she’d been holding back to fall freely. This was going to be another great night. Last night she had talked herself out of a relationship with the man she loved. What would tonight hold?
Once outside the store, Connie checked her reflection in her visor mirror. Her eyes were puffy, and her nose was running. Misery dimmed her normally bright brown eyes. In short, she looked how she felt. Like hell. Oh, well. There was nothing she could do about it now. She was already here, and there was no way she was going to go back home in the off chance of running into her roommates again. She checked her watch and saw it was barely eight o’clock. She was a little earlier than agreed, but Paul would appreciate that. Besides she had nothing else to do. That was going to be the story of her life. Connie wondered if Roger needed help on the day shift. Once school was out, she’d need something to occupy her time. Still thinking on this, she got out of the car and entered the store. She waved to the guy on duty.
“Hey, Paul. You wanna head on out since I’m here?” she asked.
She knew he and his wife had plans for the evening.
“You're a doll, Connie,” he said, grabbing his stuff from behind the counter and going to the back to clock out.
“I’ll see you next weekend,” he said on his way out.
“Yep, see ya,” she said and took the seat behind her.
She pulled her back pack onto the counter, glad she’d left it in the car this morning when she’d come in. She ma
y as well see if she could get some studying done. Maybe instead of working for the summer at the gas station, she could take some summer courses. That would put her ahead for next year. It bore more thought. Connie made a note to call her parents to get their thoughts on it. Or maybe she’d go visit them for a month or so. A change of scenery and all.
“Okay, who shall it be first? Physics or Women’s Studies?” she asked, looking from one book to the other.
An hour later, after reading the same passage four times, Connie closed her book with a snap and ran her fingers through her loose hair. She couldn't concentrate. Thoughts of her time spent with Kenny kept clouding her mind. She pulled her hair up into a high ponytail and secured it there. She wondered what he was doing right now. Humph, she grunted. He’s probably out with someone as equally as hot as he is and forgetting all about you.
“That’s right, Connie, let’s think happy thoughts,” she mumbled to herself.
The loud sounds of motorcycles outside the store pulled her attention from the path of misery it was heading towards. She sat transfixed as a group of five on bikes, all in different colors, pulled into the gas station. She stood up so she could get a better view of them. Connie’s eyes grew huge as one of the bikers riding a black and silver bike got off with one smooth motion. Though he had his helmet on, she knew instantly it was Kenny. There was no one else who could fill out a black leather jacket the way he did. As he sauntered towards the other leather clad bikers, her mouth watered at the sight of him. She was certain there was no one who moved with as much confidence as he did. Suddenly panic took hold of her. She turned away from the window. Oh, god, what if he came into the store. She was in no frame of mind to see him just yet. She was still an emotional wreck and feared she might say something completely stupid or worse yet jump him at first sight. Glancing back out the store window, Connie saw him take off his helmet, a smile on his face. Her breath caught in her chest at the sight of him. He was gorgeous, and he’d been hers.
As she watched Kenny and his friends laughing and joking, she could imagine the sparkle in his eyes. A frown puckered her brow as she saw him almost double over in amusement. Well, it was nice to see he wasn’t suffering as much as she was over their break up. She turned away. It had been as she’d thought. He was having no trouble getting over her.
Not able to help herself, only moments passed before she turned back to get another look at him. Oh, god, he was coming into the store. His long legs ate up the short distance from the pumps to the door. What was she going to do now? Any minute she would have to face him. Okay, you can do this, she told herself. Besides it wasn’t like she had a choice in the matter. Connie braced herself for the sight of him up close, but when he came through the door, she felt tears sting the backs of her eyes. This is what you gave up, her heart screamed. You are a fool, Constance Banks. A damned fool.
Kenny paused when he came in the door and saw her standing behind the counter.
“Hey, Connie. You’re in a little early aren’t you,” he said, his deep voice soothing her frayed nerves.
“Yeah,” she answered simply.
She tried not to stare, but she couldn't help it. Though it had only been a few short hours since she’d seen him it felt like an eternity.
“Did you get any rest today? You look a little tired still.”
The heat of his gaze roamed over her face not missing anything. Remember to breathe, she told herself. Just keep breathing.
“A little,” she managed pass her dry throat.
Kenny’s eyes continued to take in everything about her appearance causing Connie’s body to come to life. The heat in his gaze felt like a physical caress. Her nipples hardened against the confines of her bra. She shifted uncomfortably under his close scrutiny.
“Did you need to get gas?” she asked.
A soft smile appeared across his face.
“Yep, and I came prepared with cash this time,” he said, holding it out to her.
Connie couldn't keep her own smile at bay as she recalled their first meeting. Had it really only been a week ago?
“And wouldn't you know it the credit card machine is working tonight.”
Kenny laughed as she rung up the gas for his pump. He looked as if he were about to say something else, but the bell over the door sounded and caught both of their attentions. The group of guys who were with him all came into the store.
Good grief. Wasn’t there some kind of law that said guys who looked this good couldn't travel together? She took in the good looks of each one of them. She appreciated their individual hotness on a female level but didn’t feel anything close to what she felt when she looked at Kenny. Sure, they were all handsome, but just to look at Kenny had her struggling for breath.
“Hey, man, what’s taking so long?” a tall blonde guy asked, walking up to the counter to stand beside Kenny.
He turned in her direction and flashed a huge grin. He had an infectious smile, and despite the fact she didn’t have anything to smile about, she felt herself doing so.
“Well, who do we have here? What’s your name, darling?” he asked, holding out his hand in greeting.
Her hand reached for his automatically.
“Connie,” she answered.
She noticed a spark of recognition in his eyes as he shook her hand gently. Curious because she didn’t think she had ever seen him before. She felt confident she would have remembered if she had.
“Hey, Joe, tone down the wattage on that thing will ya. You’re liable to blind somebody,” Kenny said, pointing towards his face. “And before the rest of you get any ideas about flashing your own pearly whites, she’s taken.”
Turning back to face her, Kenny gave her a wink, and her heart stopped beating.
“And we’re just supposed to take your word for that, man? She might be ready to dump her lame ass boyfriend for a real man?” A tall, dark complexioned man pushed his way to the counter between Kenny and Joe.
“Hi, my name’s Marcus. Nice to meet you,” he said, reaching his hand out to her.
The smile he flashed her was a brilliant white across his dark skin. He was absolutely gorgeous. Connie didn’t normally find men who shaved their heads attractive, but the one standing in front of her was the exception. He had the perfect shaped head for it, she found herself musing crazily. When she took his hand the warmth of his fingers wrapped around her own cold ones.
“Connie,” she said softly, her gaze held by the glint of amusement in his onyx eyes.
“Hey, enough of that hand holding stuff,” Kenny said, a frown creasing his brow, but she could see the smile in his eyes.
“I told you man she’s taken already. So get your paws off.”
“Yeah, but there are so many better looking men out there. Maybe she’d like to keep all her options open,” another guy asked from the back.
He stood taller than the rest of his friends.
“Move it, Marcus,” he said, pulling him out of the way and stepping to the counter. “Hi, beautiful, name’s Troy.”
Another perfect white smile was flashed in her direction. Connie had the crazy urge to pinch herself. She’d never had so many gorgeous men paying attention to her at one time before. She was definitely in the twilight zone.
“Hi,” she said.
She glanced over at Kenny, uncertain as to what was going on.
“Will you guys get out of here? The store is only so big, and you guys are sucking up all the oxygen,” he said, good naturedly elbowing Troy for his position at the counter.
“What you mean is you’re scared she’ll take one of us over you,” a guy Connie hadn't yet met called from the back of the group.
She glanced in his direction. Her eyes widened at her first look at him. He had long black wavy hair that hung to his shoulders with sparkling blue eyes.
“Yeah, well, I don’t think I have anything to worry about with that. Do I, Connie?” Kenny asked, a mischievous glint in his eyes.
Mesmerized by his loo
k, she shook her head. No, he didn’t have a thing to worry about with these guys. His friends were hot, but they didn’t hold a candle to him.
“Alright, you guys,” Kenny said, turning to his friends. “Get out.”
Connie was surprised they complied with little grumbling and complaints. When it was once again just the two of them in the store, she breathed a sigh of relief. All that testosterone had been a bit overwhelming.
“Wow,” she said under her breath.
“A little much, aren’t they?”
He leaned a hip against the counter bringing him closer.
“Just a bit,” she said, her stomach fluttering with nerves.
He had paid for his gas, so why wasn’t he leaving with his friends. She glanced out the large store window and saw them either standing or sitting on their bikes in no apparent hurry.
“Your friends are waiting for you,” she said softly.
Kenny glanced in the direction she’d been looking and hunched his shoulders.
“They’re alright. Now that they’ve met you,” he said, laughing.
Had she heard him right? They’d wanted to meet her?
“What? You told your friends about me?”
Why would he do that? They weren't together any longer.
“They wanted to know where I’d been all week because they hadn't heard from me. When I explained to them I had someone new in my life, they were anxious to meet you. Your being here tonight is strictly coincidence.”
Connie was dumbstruck. She didn’t know what to say.
“They’re probably out there discussing your many assets,” he said, his gaze raking over her ample breasts.
Her face got hot at his look, and she tried to ignore her body’s reaction. It would have been easier if her body wasn’t strumming with a desire that matched the heat in his gaze.
“Why would you tell them about me?”
“Isn’t it obvious, Connie,” he said, leaning across the counter.
He caressed her cheek with his palm and brushed his lips against her open mouth.
“I’ll see you later.”