“You’re not staying to help us?” Caleb asked.
“I’ll be helping to bring Gerald back as it wasn’t his time to go and bringing others to help capture Jaye, but that is it. Your wolf business is your own. We decided long ago not to meddle in it and nothing has changed,” Zarai said with an air of confidence that had Caleb keeping his mouth shut for once. Having her around had more than a few perks.
“What about the turned humans? Jaye did that to them. Doesn’t that make it your business?” Aiden asked.
Zarai nodded. “I agree. There are several things I will be speaking with my coven leader about in regard to this situation. I will make sure to point out the humans need our help as well. If all goes as planned, I will see how many witches my coven can spare and put a team on figuring out how to reverse whatever spell Jaye used to turn them. Do you have possession of all of them?”
“One is here, the others are spread amongst a few packs within our territory. We didn’t have the time to keep an eye on them all, so other alphas volunteered to help out,” I answered.
“Not a problem. It will be easier to do them in groups anyway, so the witches don’t get drained. I’ll ensure that their memories are wiped as well. We don’t need them going off and telling their friends and family of the wolves and witches they hung out with in their time away.”
I hadn’t even thought of that. We couldn’t handle dealing with a human revolt against the shifters while we were trying to chase down Declan. No, thank you. There was enough on our plate without adding that type of craziness.
“So, how are you going to save Gerald?” Davis asked. It wasn’t surprising to me that he would be the one to bring it up.
“The only way to bring him back from the spirit world is to exchange his soul for another.”
Silence swept over the room. Liam stiffened beneath me and tightened his hold. I could sense the fear emanating off him. He likely assumed I’d volunteer, but I knew better than that. My dad would waltz right back into the spirit world just to kick my ass for that one. I liked to push his buttons, but not that much.
“So, we have to wait for someone to die to bring him back?” Caleb asked.
“No,” Zarai answered. “In seven days, when the full moon is at its highest point, there is a ritual we can perform, asking the spirit gods to give one for the other. If the sacrifice is great enough, it will be granted. You must give one of your packmates up if you to wish bring to Gerald back.”
The thought of presenting the plan to our pack later in a meeting killed me. I didn’t want to lose any of them. I may not have socialized with all of them on a regular basis, but they all had their purpose within the pack, and I cared for everyone in one way or another. We were pack. That’s what we did. Drama ceased to exist when one of our own was in danger.
“I’ll do it,” Davis said from next to me.
I snapped my head and glared daggers at him. How had I not seen that coming? He shouldn’t have been allowed in here. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
“No, I won’t allow it,” I demanded as I stood from Liam’s lap. “You said I was alpha until we get my dad back. I get final say in who is sacrificed.”
“You never accepted, Taya. I am still interim alpha, and I no longer wish to pass my duties on to you or anyone else.”
Oh, that sneaky little bastard!
“Davis, you can’t do this. The pack needs you,” I begged.
He shook his head. “No, the pack needs your dad and a capable beta. I am neither of those things. How do you see the rest of my life playing out? Because I know how I do. If my wolf can’t run free and be the predator he was meant to be, he’ll slowly go crazy. As my wolf’s mentality goes, mine won’t be too far behind it. What happens then? I’ll go rogue. You’ll be forced to put me down anyway. It’s not if, but when this happens, and you know it.”
Damn it all to hell! I didn’t like it. I wasn’t going to accept it.
I turned toward Zarai. “When I mentioned it before, you said you might be able to help Davis. What can you do for him? There has to be something.”
Zarai stood as well, making her way toward Davis. “Wolf healing is a powerful thing. If his body didn’t heal on its own, the damage may be permanent now that the open wounds are closed, but I’ll do my best. Do you mind if I touch you? It’s the only way I can know for sure.”
Davis nodded. Zarai’s hands settled on his legs as she closed her eyes. Sparks erupted from her hands, causing most of us to lean back a few inches. We waited in silence as the tension rose in the room. Finally, Zarai opened her eyes, pulling away from Davis.
“I’m sorry, Taya. His nerve damage is severe. I could keep him comfortable, but it’d be as though he was heavily medicated. His mind wouldn’t function the same as it does now.”
I needed time to think. I needed to figure out another way. Davis was family. I couldn’t lose him, too. I moved away from where I stood next to Liam as he made a move to follow me, but I shook my head. “I need some time. I’ll be back.”
Liam nodded, and I headed for the door, grateful he didn’t push me. There was a lot for me to process, and I didn’t need anyone pushing me to do what they thought was right. Davis had been my dad’s beta since before I was born. He was like the uncle I never had, and I was done watching my family die.
Chapter 2
I decided some time with my wolf was just what I needed to calm the pain raging within me. I shifted forms and went for a run. I needed to take some time to think about all that had happened. There were some definite positives, but I couldn’t decide how I felt about the negatives. The thought of losing Davis so I could get my dad back hurt deeply.
I wished there had been a way to speak with my father before any of us made any rash decisions, but I knew it was pointless. Davis could ultimately do whatever he wanted as interim alpha, but I would certainly do my best to stop him if it was best for the pack.
When I finally arrived back to the pack house, it was quiet. I quickly snuck up to my dad’s room, not ready to speak with anyone other than him yet. Logically, I knew he couldn’t talk back, but I needed to vent, and he was the only one around I knew without a doubt wouldn’t try to change my mind.
I imagined all the guys were taking Davis’s side. I really needed another girl to join our group. Maybe I could count on Caleb to not screw things up with Jamie if he decided to pursue something serious with her and she would be around more to have my back against all their testosterone.
I walked into my dad’s room and promptly shut the door behind me. I leaned back against the wood surface and let out a deep sigh. I took stock of my dad’s large form laying on the oversized bed. He still appeared as if he was sleeping, just like the day Declan spelled him. His cheeks were warm and pink, hair raven-colored and streaked through with silver. I settled in next to him on the bed, grasping his much larger hand with both of mine.
“Hey, Dad,” I whispered. “I miss you beyond words. I feel like everything that could go wrong since you’ve been gone has. Now I finally have a way to get you back, but we lose Davis in the process. I need you to tell me what to do. I need you to wake up, wrap me in your arms, and tell me everything is going to be okay just like you did when I was a kid. I’m not ready for this alpha stuff. I know if you were here, you’d know exactly what to do.”
I closed my eyes as I brought my knees up and leaned my head down, thinking about what my dad might do in this situation. He was methodical and always considered the ripple effect of any decision before he acted. I seemed to be his opposite, always reacting before thinking things through. I let my emotions rule my decisions a majority of the time, but now that I was the alpha-in-training, I’d have to learn how to have some patience. Ha! The thought of me having the patience to run the pack like my dad had was comical.
I went back to thinking about what my dad would do if he was here and I knew exactly what he’d say. I just hadn’t wanted to accept the truth. The truth hurt.
“You’d let Davi
s decide for himself, wouldn’t you? But what if he has a chance to get better? What if Zarai was wrong? How can we let him choose this? It kills me to think he’s lived his whole life serving the pack and now he wants to give the ultimate sacrifice for us. It doesn’t seem fair.”
A hand settled on my shoulder and I jumped, turning abruptly. I had been sitting on the bed with my back to the door and hadn’t heard anyone come in, but Augie stood there with more emotions in his crystal blue eyes than I wanted to address.
“You’re right, Taya. It’s not fair, but it is Davis’s choice. He’s lived for over eight decades, and he’s okay with this. He knew his days were numbered as soon as he woke up after the hospital. I know it’s going to be hard, but you have to find a way to be okay with it. I know that’s easier said than done, but if you fight him on this and win, you won’t like the ramifications of your decision.”
I nodded, understanding exactly what he meant by ramifications. The day would come when Davis’s wolf went rogue if he lived without truly being able to embrace his wolf side. We’d have to stand by and watch as the man we’d loved for years slipped away before finally killing him anyway, just like he had said earlier. Rogue wolves were dangerous to themselves and those around them. They didn’t care about repercussions and that got innocent people killed.
“That doesn’t mean I have to like it.” I pouted as I leaned against Augie, soaking up all the strength he was offering.
“No, it doesn’t, but it does mean you have to support him. You’re like the daughter he never had. He’s watched over you from afar for the last eighteen years. You should have seen the look of devastation on his face when you stormed out. He hated hurting you.”
Shit. Now I felt like an asshole.
“Do you know where he is?” I asked.
Augie nodded. “He’s back in his bed. He was having phantom leg pains, so Alex gave him a sedative.”
We were so lucky to have a pack doctor on hand anytime we needed him. Lately, it seemed as though we’d needed him a lot more than usual, but he’d been there without question every time.
“Phantom leg pains?” What in the world was that?
“Alex did some research on it and it happens when someone loses a limb or functionality of one. Their brain still thinks that body part is working and tells a person it’s there and available for use, but it’s not. The sensations originate between the spinal cord and brain. Alex said there’s no way to make them stop unless we keep him basically comatose, which Davis wouldn’t agree to. He’d have to deal with this on a regular basis, potentially for years if he were to live for that long.”
My heart sank for Davis. The psychological healing he’d have to deal with while also trying to keep his wolf tame sounded like it would be unbearable. I couldn’t fight him on this decision. He deserved to make his own choices and I didn’t need to add salt to the wound by being selfish. That wasn’t fair or right of me.
“When he wakes up, I’ll apologize to him. Thanks for coming to find me, Augie.”
“I’ll always be here for you.” He leaned in, gently placing a kiss to my head. “Now, you should probably go find Liam. His wolf seems to have an issue with the way you deal with things when you’re upset.” Augie laughed. “I’m used to you running out and needing time to process, but your new overprotective boyfriend is not. I barely kept him from running after you once you disappeared out the door.”
Boyfriend? The word sounded so weird after my wolf had called him mate so many times. Boyfriend seemed so insignificant in comparison, but I wasn’t ready to call him mate out loud, so it would do for the time being.
My wolf made her wants known as I scooted off the bed, giving Augie a proper hug. “Thank you, again.”
“You’re welcome.”
It truly made everything easier that he wasn’t jealous of my time with Liam and fully supported whatever was happening. I had worried that my interest in Liam would hurt Augie, but his happiness for me emanated from him, and his actions spoke louder than words. They always had with us.
He followed me out of the room and we went back downstairs. I checked in on Davis just in case he was already awake, but he was still sleeping from whatever Alex had given him. Augie promised to let me know when he woke, so I could speak with Davis and ease his mind about how I felt.
Zarai was in the living room with a bag next to her. She nodded to Augie. “Thank you for the items. The book is irreplaceable. Our coven leader had been so sure she grabbed it, but when we didn’t find it after the coven was settled, we assumed it to be lost.”
I glanced between the two of them, confused.
“I gave Zarai the items you found while you were out on your run. She needs to get back to her coven, and I figured you wanted her to have them.”
“Got it. Yes, I’m glad you did. I meant to give them to her before she left anyway.” I turned toward Zarai as she stood. “You’re leaving already?”
Doubts ran through my mind. What if she didn’t come back? What if her coven leader denied us the help with Jaye and my father? Panic was suddenly all-consuming. I was not used to the feeling, nor did I like it.
“Calm, child. I will be back. I’ve already sent word back to my coven. You have nothing to fear.”
If only that were true, I would be able to breathe a little easier.
“When should we expect you back?” Augie asked.
“I’ll be back with several others the day of the full moon. Please make sure you’re ready. You won’t get a second chance at this.”
I nodded, understanding the stakes. I would not screw up the opportunity to get my father back. “We’ll be ready and have housing provided for you and your coven members. We appreciate this more than we can possibly express. I know we won’t ever be able to repay you.”
Zarai held up the bag which held the book and other items. “You already have, I promise.”
My curiosity piqued at that statement, making me wonder what the book was to them, but I wasn’t going to pry. I had too many other things on my mind, and she appeared eager to leave.
“Do you need a ride somewhere?” I asked.
She smirked at me. “No, I’ll be fine.”
“Okay,” I said, stretching the word. If I wasn’t so worried about pissing her off and losing the coven’s help, I’d be asking a million more questions. It nearly killed me to hold my tongue.
Before turning for the door, Zarai smiled at us. “Blessed be.” Then disappeared through the front door.
“That was interesting,” Augie mused.
“That it was. I’m going to go find Liam. Don’t forget to let me know when Davis wakes. I’ve got my phone, so send me a text.”
“You got it.”
I felt like a chicken shit, because as I walked away, I secretly hoped it would take a while for Davis to wake. I wasn’t ready for the emotional hurricane that would ensue with the conversation we needed to have. It was inevitable, though, so I was going to need to woman up and deal with it or risk missing out on the last moments with him. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I did.
Chapter 3
I left the room, checking the kitchen first. Courtney was in there, preparing that night’s dinner. “Hey, have you seen Liam?” I asked, interrupting her chopping.
“He grabbed a snack and went out the back door. Looked a little upset, if you ask me. Is everything okay?”
I gave her a small smile. “It will be, sooner or later.”
“You two seem to be getting pretty close…” she said without actually saying what she meant. I knew she was just trying to get some juicy details, but I wasn’t ready for sharing.
“We have. He and his brothers have been very supportive since they arrived.”
She grinned at me in a way that said she knew my response was a bunch of crap, but I ignored it and called out ‘thanks’ for the information about Liam as I walked out the back door.
Once I was outside and back to figuring out where Liam was, I realiz
ed I had a bit of a problem. Our property was thousands of acres. I wasn’t exactly sure how I was going to find him, but he had to be around somewhere.
My wolf perked up at the thought of hunting Liam. That hadn’t been my exact thought, but she was a predator. Plus, her way was much faster than me driving around an ATV until I found him, so I decided to let her have her fun. I quickly got undressed and rolled my phone up into my clothes, so I wouldn’t miss Augie’s text about Davis. Once my clothes were situated and easier for my wolf to carry, I let the change take over.
My body shuddered, remembering the way Jaye had slowed my shift during the fight. The pain was excruciating, but I took pleasure in knowing she had an arm to replace thanks to Augie, assuming her shit-tastic sorcery magic could do such a thing.
Once the shift was complete, I shook my fur out and gently picked up my clothes with my teeth. I’d done it so many times with my wolf, she’d become a pro at keeping the drool to a minimum. A little drool was better than walking around naked later when I decided to shift back.
Liam and I had slept in the same bed together and seen each other unclothed several times when we had needed to shift, but we’d yet to actually have sex. I wanted to, but I knew once we did, we’d be crossing an emotional line my heart couldn’t come back from. I was still afraid of the heartbreak I was sure to suffer when he went back to the Catskills. I didn’t need to get even more attached.
My wolf didn’t agree with those thoughts. She thought we needed to mark our territory and claim him as our mate so no other could, but she didn’t understand we both had responsibilities. It wasn’t as simple as she wanted it to be. As I wanted it to be.
I’d held all men at a distance my whole life. Of course, the one guy I wouldn’t mind pursuing an actual relationship with just had to be a potential alpha from a pack located on the other side of the country. It seemed to be how my luck was going lately.
Before I could dwell on my current predicament too much, my wolf picked up Liam’s scent and the chase was on. Her joy at hunting him was euphoric, and my pulse kicked into overdrive. My heart was pounding and breath labored. We were getting closer to Liam, and I had an extreme need to lay my hands on him. My wolf’s desires were taking over, and I had no desire to stop her.
Shades of Magic (Raven Point Pack Trilogy Book 2) Page 2