Then Leanna charged her, grabbing Angela by the hair and yanking her down to the ground. She began to hit Angela, and though Leanna was just a spirit, Angela felt every blow. They rained down on her chest and her face, and she threw her arms up, trying to protect herself from them. It felt as though time was frozen, but it couldn’t have been more than a few seconds before Leanna was lifted off her.
Angela sat up, her body throbbing with pain and her chest heaving with adrenaline. Ryan had Leanna in his arms, one wrapped around her waist and the other securing her neck. The spirit was flailing furiously, using her fists to rail against him, but Jordan rushed forward from her watchful position and slapped Leanna as hard as she could across the face.
Leanna went still with shock, but then she recovered, spitting in Jordan’s face and spewing curses at the woman while Ryan wrestled her to the ground.
Angela got to her feet slowly, shaken by the attack and unsure what it meant. Had she upset the connection somehow? Would they still get what they needed from Leanna? She didn’t even really know what they were here to do, but she knew that in her attempt to hold Leanna’s attention, she had pushed the woman too far and made her snap.
Chapter 32
Ryan
He was proud of Angela for standing her ground. It wasn’t just about Leanna in that moment—it was about Angela taking her own power back and feeling confident in herself again. That was more important than anything, which was why he had stayed out of her way and let her do it. Truthfully, though, it wasn’t what they were here for. They needed to get information from Leanna that would allow them to go back to the place where she had first attached herself to Angela, and they needed to know what her intention was. Both pieces of information were essential to performing the ritual they would need to enact to release Angela from Leanna’s control.
Angering Leanna was the opposite of their goal, but Ryan couldn’t take away Angela’s chance to face down her captor and abuser. But it had gone too far, and Leanna’s anger had almost been strong enough to abruptly end the connection between the worlds again, causing potentially terrible consequences. If all three of them were stuck where Ryan had been earlier, then they were in trouble.
But Ryan had Leanna under control, pinning her body down with his and looking down into her face. “You asked for that.” He kept his voice light and calm. “You can’t expect to do what you’ve done to Angela without her fighting back, can you? You don’t want her to be a victim like those women you rail against.”
Leanna glared up at him, still furious. “Those two boys I gave birth to are ruined because of the man who fathered them. It’s a mercy to both them and the world to end their lives with his. They would only grow up as warped and miserable as he was.”
Ryan could hear Jordan moving towards Angela, to make sure that she was all right, and he was grateful to her. It allowed him to focus on getting what he needed from the woman he had trapped in his power for only a limited amount of time. And he couldn’t use any of that time being horrified that she could actually desire the murder of her own children at her own hand.
“How did you die?” Ryan asked Leanna. “Did Gary kill you?”
“He broke into my house. I was afraid of him.” Leanna became suddenly weepy and petulant. “I had the gun for self-defense. I’m allowed to defend myself!”
“And what happened?” Ryan said. “Did he kill you?”
Leanna’s gaze shuttered, and she closed herself off from him again. “I know what you’re doing. The more you know about me, the easier it is to get rid of me.”
“Maybe you killed yourself,” he said. “Maybe you were so weak that you couldn’t take it anymore. Maybe you were the kind of woman you hate so much now—the kind who would let a man control her so completely that he could make you commit suicide.”
“No!” Leanna began to fight him again, her face flushing with her rage. “He fought me. The gun went off, and he killed me. He did it! And I’m going to make him pay! I’m going to take everything away from him. That new house and that new whore. He thinks he’s safe from me! He thinks that I can’t get to him now that I’m dead! He’s a liar, and a cheat, and an abuser! I’ll kill him! I’ll kill all of them!”
Ryan grabbed Leanna’s wrists, pinning them back because she had begun to punctuate her words with her fists, striking him again and again. “When you have that, will you feel better?” he asked her, gritting his teeth against her as she dug her nails into his skin. “Will that make you whole?”
“It will be the purest joy I’ve ever felt.”
She said it with hatred, but it was still enough. That was what Leanna wanted—that was her one goal. End Gary and everything that he loved.
“Why Angela?” Ryan asked. “Why her?”
“I’m not telling you anything else,” Leanna said. “You think I don’t know things, but I do. I know how you’ll banish me, and if I don’t tell you how I found her, then you can’t. You’ll never get rid of me.”
Frustrated, Ryan looked away from Leanna, his eyes moving to the tree line to their left. He hadn’t consciously looked there, and he wasn’t thinking about James at all. But as soon as he turned his head, the young boy came into view, standing there by the trees. When their eyes met, James waved to him and smiled.
“Hello, Ryan!”
Ryan went cold, his heart hammering in his chest. His hands went slack on Leanna, and he had to react quickly when she felt the release and tried to pull away from him. Channeling all of his strength, he slammed her down on the ground again, his eyes never leaving James.
“What do you want?” Ryan asked, his voice hoarse as James grew closer to him. “Why are you here?”
“I want to help.”
“No,” Ryan said, having to force himself not to physically recoil from the face he knew so well. James was just as he had been all of those years ago. That was the same face that had looked back at Ryan just before he had tripped and fallen into the deepest part of the marsh. Ryan hadn’t seen his face since because when the ten-foot alligator had reared its head and snatched James between its enormous, deadly teeth, Ryan hadn’t been able to look. He hadn’t been able to move.
He could have saved James—he knew he could have. At that age, Ryan had already been strong. He had already begun to shift into his dragon form, and he was still training and learning, but he knew how to handle himself. He could have saved his friend from the jaws of the reptile that brutally shook him to death and punctured him with its teeth.
But he hadn’t, because he had frozen with fear. He had choked in the moment that he was most needed.
And James had died because of it. The little boy who was facing him now had died because of Ryan’s failure, and Ryan had carried that with him every single day since. It was why he couldn’t leave the bayou. It was why he lived in the middle of the bayou, and it was why he had never left Louisiana.
He had abandoned James once. He couldn’t do it again.
“You have to let me help,” James said, standing right in front of Ryan again.
“No,” Ryan said, his voice strangled. “You can’t. You can’t help me. God—you can’t help me. I didn’t help you.”
“You couldn’t have saved me.”
“Yes, I could have,” Ryan said, his guilt and pain almost unbearable. “You don’t understand, James. I could have.”
“Who the hell is this?” Leanna snapped, still fighting against him. He was keeping her pinned on sheer instinct, all of his mental processes focused on James.
Ryan ignored Leanna’s question. “There’s so much I need to make right with you,” Ryan told James. “I’ll come back and do it. I promise. But I can’t—I need—I have to help Angela now. I couldn’t help you, but I can help her.”
“But I know the answer.” James reached out for Ryan, touching his arm. “Come with me.”
“Ryan,” Angela said, a punch of fear in just that one word. “Don’t leave.”
Torn, Ryan looked back at Angela
. It was amazing how much she had come to mean to him in just a few days. The look of fear on her face hurt his heart, and he knew that he never wanted to do anything that would cause her any more pain or fear than she’d already experienced. Jordan was sitting with her, keeping Angela calm while watching warily. When Ryan looked at Jordan, she nodded toward James.
“Go,” Jordan said. “He wouldn’t be here if there wasn’t a purpose.”
“What if the purpose is to sabotage me now, because I killed him?” Ryan asked, voicing the deep-rooted fear that he hadn’t even fully realized he had. “What if he’s been here, all these years, unable to move on until he gets justice for what I did?”
Jordan shook her head. “That’s your guilt talking, Ryan. The boy is here to help you. I don’t know how, but he is. You have to trust him. It’s the right call.”
“Hurry,” James said, reaching out to Ryan and tugging on his arm. “You should come with me now.”
He didn’t know if it was the right decision or not. Was the feeling in his gut guilt, or was it a premonition? He couldn’t tell, so he was going to rely on Jordan, whose judgment he unfailingly trusted. “Come take her,” he told Jordan, looking down at Leanna. “Keep her away from Angela.”
Jordan came over, grabbing Leanna and pinning her down with little effort, despite her small size.
Freed from his burden, Ryan went over to Angela and knelt down in front of her. “This is the right decision.” He looked into her eyes and hoping beyond hope that he was right about that. “I know this boy. He was my best friend, before he died. Leanna knows not to give me the information that we need, and I can’t help you without that information. I don’t know how he can help me, but I have to try.”
Angela glanced toward James, then nodded slowly. “If you’re sure.”
“I’m not,” he said, unable to be anything but honest with her, now that they had shared so much of themselves together. “But I think it’s the best choice we have.”
“I trust you.”
Her words were like a sweet balm, and he leaned down, kissing her tenderly. “I’m coming back to you.”
“I know.” Angela touched his cheek lightly, and he pressed her hand as he got back to his feet.
The moment between them felt intimate, despite the people all around them. When she looked up into his eyes, he knew that she believed in him, and having that knowledge was like having a secret power that no one else knew about.
He turned back towards James, and for the first time, he didn’t feel sick with guilt just at the sight of the boy’s face. The guilt was still there, but it was softer somehow, as though Angela had helped to ease it. “Where are you taking me?” Ryan asked.
James motioned to him, not really answering. “Follow me.”
As James started to walk away, Ryan followed him towards the trees and then through them. When they crossed the tree line, they were deep within the bayou almost immediately, and Ryan knew exactly where they were.
A surge of panic hit him, and he was sure that he had fallen into James’ trap.
“No,” he said, stopping abruptly. “No, I don’t want to go back there.”
James turned, staring back at him, his head tilted. “Why not, Ryan?”
“You know why,” Ryan said, taking a step backward. “This is your way of getting back at me, and that’s fine. You deserve that. You should get back at me, James. I failed you completely. But this is about Angela. Please—don’t make her suffer, too. I need to help her, and then if you want to ruin my life, ruin it. Do whatever you need to do.”
“Why would I need to ruin your life?” James asked, his head tilting further. “Maybe because …of this?”
James’ head unhinged from his neck, and his skin turned a sickly green. Wounds appeared all over him—marks where teeth had torn through his flesh. His eyes rolled back and his mouth went slack, and blood began to pour from the jagged tears in his body.
Ryan felt like there was a weight on his chest, crushing down on him, so that he couldn’t breathe. He was hyperventilating, and he began to sweat, the sound of his own blood rushing in his ears. “I’m sorry,” he said. “James, I’m so sorry that I let that happen to you. I should have saved you. I know I should have. I was young, and stupid, and scared. I might as well have been the one who killed you.”
Still marred with death, James moved towards him. “Wasn’t it your idea to sneak out that night, Ryan? You wanted to see if we could spend all night in the bayou. Alone. You said people would think we were brave. Isn’t that right?”
“Yes,” Ryan said, forcing the word out. “Yes. It was my fault we were there. It was my fault you died. If you think I don’t know that every single day of my life, then you’re wrong. Why do you think I live out in the middle of the bayou? Why is it that I can’t stand the thought of leaving Louisiana? I abandoned you once, James, but I swear I won’t do it again. I need to help Angela, and then whatever you have in store for me—I accept it. I’ll take it. I’ll deal with it. Please let me save her first.”
James lifted his head up, returning to the version of himself that looked just like the boy that had sat beside Ryan in math class for so many years. “You don’t deserve help, but I’m giving it to you anyway.”
Ryan was wary. “Why would you do that?”
“Because this is how I’m going to pass,” James said. “I’ve never been able to, because I blame you. I blame you for the fact that I was out there that night. I blame you for not saving me. I always have. And I’ve sat here, in this in-between state. I couldn’t even bear to haunt you. But now I know how to pass on, Ryan. I have to let go of my hatred. That’s my goal. So, I’m going to help you.”
Somewhere in the back of his mind, Ryan had always hoped that someday he might find some way to believe that James understood. That James didn’t blame him. Hearing that James did was like a knife in his gut, but it was also healing at the same time. Part of what had haunted him so much was not knowing. Now that he did, it was almost a relief.
“You have every right to hate me,” Ryan told James, emotion clogging his throat and making his voice hoarse. “I hate myself for it.”
“Good,” James said, turning around again. “Come with me. I’m helping you for me. For my sense of peace. And for Angela, who seems nice.”
Ryan followed James further into the bayou, recognizing that they were getting closer and closer to the spot where James had died. They stopped right before they got there.
“It was here,” James said, turning back towards Ryan. All of the warmth that had been in his face when he was still coaxing Ryan to come with him was gone, replaced by a steely determination and an anger that had no business being on such a young face. “Angela was gathering samples when it happened. Plant samples. She was vulnerable, I guess, because she wasn’t watching anything around her. Her mind was clear, except for what she was working on. And Leanna took her. I saw it happen, because I spend a lot of time here.”
“It was here,” Ryan said, looking around the one place in the bayou he never returned to. “God—this spot. It’s cursed.”
“Don’t let yourself off that easily,” James said, turning back to him. “It wasn’t this spot that killed me.”
Ryan met James’ eyes and a deep sadness took over him. “I truly am sorry,” Ryan said, quietly. “I wish that I hadn’t suggested we go out. I wish that I had stepped in and saved you.”
“You could have fought that alligator.”
“I could have,” Ryan said. “I was young, and I was stupid, and I was afraid. I’ve spent every day regretting it. That doesn’t give you your life back, but at least you know that I don’t shy away from the fact that I’m responsible for your death. I haven’t been able to think about you or look at a picture of you without becoming almost physically sick. And your parents—when they moved away. My family helped them. I don’t know what else to do, James. If there is something else, please tell me. I’ll do it.”
“You can’t give me
my life back,” James said, looking away from Ryan. “I’ve let myself hate you all this time. I have to stop now, or I’ll never pass over to the other side, where maybe I can get some rest.”
Ryan said nothing, staring down at the ground. Continuing to offer his apologies and demonstrating his grief would only serve to try to make him feel better. It wouldn’t help James at all. In fact, it would probably make things worse for James. So he waited to hear what James wanted from him.
“I went out that night, too,” James said, after a long silence.
Ryan looked up at him, brows knit, uncertain.
“It’s not like you dragged me,” James said, with no small amount of bitterness in the words. “I forgive you. I know that you didn’t want what happened to happen.”
Ryan blinked in surprise, never having expected those words. “You do?”
“I’m forgiving you because my anger towards you is only hurting me,” James said, “but yes. I forgive you.”
There was so much that Ryan wanted to say in response, but he didn’t have the chance. James disappeared before his eyes, and he took with him the sharpest and deepest part of Ryan’s pain.
He felt almost light, standing there, and he let the moment wash over him. But there was no time to figure out how he felt about achieving closure with James after all these years.
He might have been freed from the spirit haunting him, but Angela wasn’t free yet.
Chapter 33
Angela
Angela stayed back from Jordan and Leanna, keeping a good distance between herself and the spirit she didn’t trust not to attack her again. She still wasn’t sure what Ryan’s plan for Leanna was, or if she had actually been helpful in keeping Leanna’s attention and provoking her. She wasn’t sure where Ryan had gone, or how the spirit of the boy who kept appearing was going to help. She wasn’t sure of anything, other than that Ryan was her only hope of making it through the next few days with any part of her life intact.
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