I jerked my legs, the only part of me that was free, off the ground and kicked them back, bending my knees sharply. The toes of my shoes barely brushed his crotch before Remi spun me toward the blank wall beside the dresser. My face planted against the pale yellow paint, I struggled to breathe with the full weight of two hundred and fifty pounds of sheer muscle pressing me forward. A hard thigh slid between mine—
“For your protection and mine, Leah,” he said.
But the rough, raw quality to his words and the surge of pleasure between my legs told another story.
I beat my forehead against the wall, and the pleasure faded. This wasn’t the man I’d fantasized about in the bed across the room. This wasn’t a romantic…whatever my libido was trying to imagine it was. Lydia was dead. Brooke was missing. It was sick to be thinking about anything else right now.
“I’m going to move my hand so you can talk, okay?” Remi said in my ear. He sounded strong, in control. Resentment sparked in my stomach, burning hot. I’d been under men’s control before, and it never worked out well for me. But tonight I had to think about Brooke.
I nodded.
Remi removed his hand, his fingers sliding across lips, cheek, jaw, and coming to rest around my throat. Only slightly less threatening than before. I opened my mouth to point that out.
“Be careful,” he warned me. “Be very careful, Leah.”
So maybe not as in control as I’d thought. I had to swallow hard against the fear threatening to steal my voice. “Why?”
“Because I want to help you.” He shifted behind me, and a heavy length pushing at the base of my spine flared into my awareness. “I can’t to do that if you keep making trouble.”
His words distracted me from his erection. “Why would you want to help me? Why are you even here?” I sucked in a deep, sudden breath, so sudden I choked. “You’re a part of this, is that it? They left you here to confront me?” I jerked uselessly against his weight. “Where is my daughter?”
I felt more than saw his head shake. “I don’t know where Brooke is. I’m not a part of this.”
I attempted to throw a look over my shoulder, but the way he held me left no room to maneuver. “Why else would you be here?”
Remi took a deep breath, the expansion of his chest cutting off my air. On the exhale he eased back. “I’m not part of this. I can help you.”
“You keep saying that.” I peeled myself from the wall and turned just as carefully as he’d moved. “I’m not hearing another explanation.”
Remi stood a few feet back, his arms locked over his chest, expression unreadable. This wasn’t the man from my fantasies, the gruff but tender man I’d known for such a short time when he’d been injured. This man was hard. Cold. Dangerous.
I reached for my cell in my back pocket.
Remi watched, his gaze showing zero satisfaction when I found my pocket empty. He held up a hand—and my cell phone.
I reached for it. “I need to call the police, Remi.”
He shook his head, keeping the phone just out of my reach. “She is beyond needing an ambulance and you know it,” he said, jerking his chin toward Lydia. “The red tape cops would bring with them will only make it harder to find Brooke.”
I forced my breath to stay even, my body still as my child’s name left his lips. I hadn’t spoken it aloud; I knew that. But Remi... “The only way you’d know her name was if you were involved. If you’re not, give me the phone.”
“I’m not involved.”
“Then give me my phone. Now.”
He slid the small black rectangle into his pocket. I lunged for it.
The next thing I knew, my hands were gripped in one of his and my jaw was in the other. He dragged me onto my tiptoes until I was almost level with him. “I’m not involved with whatever happened here,” he bit out. “I promise.”
I kneed him in the groin. Or tried to. Remi was prepared for everything, it seemed.
Fuck polite. Fuck complying with him—I went as crazy as I could with my hands in an unbreakable grip. Remi didn’t take it lying down, but he didn’t hurt me. Nor did he release my hands.
“Look,” he barked, getting right in my face. “I don’t know where Brooke is. I didn’t take her. I don’t know what the fuck is going on here—but I can’t help you figure it out if you don’t stop.”
“It doesn’t matter how many times you say it,” I barked right back. “I don’t believe you!”
Dragging me hard against him, he leaned in until his lips brushed mine and his golden-brown eyes were the only thing I could see. “I couldn’t have done this because I wasn’t here—I was following you home.”
Following… “What?”
He released me, practically throwing my hands away. “I was following you from work. I came into the house after you. I couldn’t have done this.”
But my adrenaline-saturated brain wasn’t getting it. “You followed me. From work?” I realized I was rubbing my aching wrists and forced myself to stop. No sign of weakness. “Why? How?” I shook my head hard. “How long have you been following me?”
“Long enough to know your daughter’s name is Brooke. To know everything there is to know about her and you. What I don’t know is who took her. At least not yet.”
My stomach lurched, probably for a number of reasons—adrenaline, fear, confusion, and the sick certainty that my daughter was out there somewhere with someone who didn’t care about her, someone who might hurt her. Someone who could disappear with her, and I would never see her again.
I barely made it to the hall bathroom before I threw up.
“Leah—”
“Out!” I shrieked. Surprisingly Remi retreated to the hall, giving me a few moments of semi-privacy to clean up the mess I’d made.
It wasn’t until I began a quiet search of the cabinet for anything I could use as a weapon that he reappeared. “Not a good idea.”
I allowed myself a moment to slump against the counter before straightening. “You’re not going to convince me that you’re a good guy, Remi. I’ve met your family, remember? They kidnapped me. You are fully capable of kidnapping a child. Just tell me where Brooke is and I’ll do whatever you want.”
A tick in his jaw was the only sign that what I’d just said might make him feel something, anything. Whatever it was, he fought it back. “I’m not going to waste time arguing with you anymore. You need to pack a bag.”
“Why?”
“Because you can’t stay here.”
I threw up my hands. “And where do you suggest I go?” Not that I was going anywhere, especially with him. Brooke had been taken from here. I needed to be here in case her kidnappers came back. “I need to call the police, get them looking for her. I need to find her.”
Remi grabbed the doorjamb on either side, the position both blocking my path and emphasizing the obscene size of his biceps and pecs. I forced my eyes to stay on his face, to stare him down no matter how much my insides felt like Jell-O.
“You already know what’s happened to her, don’t you?” he mused.
“I don’t.” And I didn’t, not specifics anyway. That didn’t mean I had no clue who was behind it. Hadn’t feared something like this for years. I’d gotten complacent, though, allowed my guard down. Too soon, it seemed.
“You do,” he said again, eyes narrowing when I tightened my lips. “You don’t have to stay here, Leah. Whoever this is, they know how to get in touch with you. They will, when they’re ready. Won’t they?”
“And in the meantime?” I asked, ignoring his question. What was happening to my baby while they decided when they’d “be ready”?
“In the meantime—”
The ring of a phone cut Remi off, the sound originating from his pocket. Glancing from me to it, he fished the cell from his jeans and lifted it so I could see the white UNKNOWN flashing on the black screen. I reached for the phone.
“I don’t think so,” Remi said, pulling back just in time for my fingers to barely brus
h the edge. Turning the phone to himself, he clicked to answer the call, then clicked Speaker.
And waited.
“Leah?”
My heart slammed into my ribs. I staggered back to sit on the closed toilet seat, gripping the edges like they could keep me upright and sane—except I didn’t think that was possible. Not anymore.
Chapter Three
Remi —
I narrowed my eyes on Leah’s face, watching the color leach out, the way her hands came up, almost as if to ward something—or someone—off. She knew that voice. It scared her. Why?
“Who is this?” I used the tone that made marks shit their pants.
Silence. I could practically hear the man calculating, deciding on the best course of action. What I didn’t hear was backing down.
“Oh, Leah,” the man finally said. “You know better than to bring someone else into this.”
“Where is Brooke?” she asked, voice trembling as much as her body. I could see it, see the fear gripping her. The need to pull her close, to comfort her, give her the safety of my arms, rose to choke me, but I forced it ruthlessly away. Now wasn’t the time, nor would Leah welcome my touch.
“Brooke is safe,” the man said. “Did you have any doubt?”
“You killed Lydia,” she said, her tone all hell yeah I doubt it.
A heavy sigh crossed the line. He got her message loud and clear. He could read her just by her voice.
He knew her. Intimately. The thought blazed through my mind, hazing everything in red.
“An unfortunate accident,” he was saying. “I didn’t let Brooke see, I assure you of that. She is safe and sound.”
“I want to speak to her,” Leah said. “Please. Just let me tell her it’s okay.”
The little sob that said everything definitely wasn’t okay tore at me, threatened to distract me even more than the jealousy. I’d never encountered that before—on a job I was all business; emotion wasn’t a factor.
With Leah it was all emotion. Definite distraction.
“I always knew you’d be a wonderful mother,” the man said. “But right now I don’t think speaking to Brooke is the best idea. She’s finally calm. Hearing Mommy’s voice would undo all my hard work.”
Hectic color hit Leah’s cheeks. “You’re a bastard.”
“I’m not, Leah. You know I’m not.”
A tear squeezed out as she closed her eyes, tearing at my gut, but there was no trace of weakness when she asked, “How did you find us?”
“An informant. He’d seen a news story a while ago, something about you being kidnapped?” Concern creeped in, making my skin crawl. “Everything turned out fine, it seems.”
Leah scoffed. “Would you care if it hadn’t?”
“How could you even ask me that?”
Leah tightened her lips in that way she had when she desperately wanted to say something but shouldn’t. She knew him as well as he did her, then.
How well?
I shoved the question down deep. The caller was keeping this personal; getting down to business might throw him off. “What is it you want?” I asked.
Another pause—he didn’t like talking to me. It proved my point. Finally he spoke, his tone almost tired. “Leah knows what I want; I’m sure she’ll fill you in. She returns what belongs to a certain powerful someone, and she gets what belongs to her back safe and sound. That’s it. Simple.” Another sigh. “I’ll be waiting, Leah.”
The call clicked off.
As if her strings had been cut, Leah dropped to her knees on the floor, her body bowing down over her thighs. No matter how much my brain shouted that it was a bad idea, my heart forced me to go to her. Sobs threatened to choke her as she rocked forward and back, her face practically on the floor, crying her daughter’s name—I couldn’t stand it, couldn’t leave her in so much fucking pain that it was ripping my guts out.
Kneeling down, I planted my knees on either side of hers and pulled her up into my arms, her face in the hollow of my shoulder, her tears soaking my shirt.
Holy shit.
I knelt there, her soft, trembling body against mine, and knew, in that moment, that I was lost. I had long ago decided never to walk back into her life. I could never be what she needed, except right now I actually was. Everything she needed.
I couldn’t walk away from that.
And some damned part of me, down deep where I’d buried it alongside those memories of family and love and peace, was fucking ecstatic. I was holding the woman I loved in my arms for the very first time.
While she cried for her missing child.
Christ, I was a bastard.
The knowledge made my voice rougher than I wanted. “We need to go.”
Leah shook her head against my chest.
I eased back, tilted her chin up until those liquid brown eyes met mine. “We need to go.”
She blinked, still hazy. A pair of tears rolled down her cheeks.
I don’t know what I was thinking; hell, maybe I wasn’t thinking at all. I’d thought my instincts were all for killing, not for caring. But something I couldn’t resist pushed me forward until my lips trapped a tear against her skin. My tongue snaked out to brush it away, to take the taste of her pain into my mouth. I moved to the other side and traced the path of her tears from jaw to eye, her lashes fluttering against my skin. When I straightened, so did she.
Our lips barely brushed each other.
Something powerful, something holy clenched my heart into a fucking knot behind my too-tight ribs.
“Leah”—I grabbed her arms and moved her away from me, telling myself I wasn’t tearing a piece of me out while doing it—“we need to go.” I made myself breathe, focus. “We can’t find her tonight.” At least not from here. Back home I had what I needed to get us started.
Leah looked anywhere but at me. Was she angry? Disgusted?
Did it matter?
“I can’t—”
“You can.” Pushing myself to my feet, I dragged her up with me. “What is it he wants? Is it here?” I doubted it considering the state of the house. Leah wouldn’t keep something here that might draw danger to her daughter.
When she didn’t answer, I gave her a little shake. “Is it?”
Making a visible effort to pull herself together, she wiped the backs of her hands across her eyes, smearing mascara as she went. She looked like she had been through hell and back—and she had—and still I had a hard time believing any woman could be so beautiful.
Would you get your mind on now and not your dick?
I dropped my hands. “Leah?”
Fists clenched at her side. She lifted her head to glare at me. “Go to hell, Remi.”
I wanted to hear my full name on her lips—not the shortened version, but the whole thing, just once. I wanted her to say it when we were as close as we’d been moments ago. To say it when I was inside her. I wanted—
To hell with what I wanted. Bastard, remember? Be the bastard you both need you to be.
“I’m all you’ve got right now, so if I’m going to hell, you better pack for warm weather.”
“I’m not leaving.”
I raised an eyebrow. “You want to stay here with Mrs. Lydia?”
The words drained the fight from Leah’s body—exactly what I’d hoped to accomplish. The stricken look on her face made me wish I could kick my own ass.
I forced my own anger out with a deep breath. “Look, I don’t have anything here that can help you. I need you to come with me.” I held up the phone. “They obviously know how to contact you.”
She reached for the phone, and I slipped it back into my pocket. If she got ahold of it, I’d probably never see her again. At least if she had a say in it.
Which she didn’t. Not right now.
She stared at the pocket where I’d tucked away her lifeline to her daughter. White teeth gleamed as she began to nibble at her bottom lip. I forced back a groan. Apparently it didn’t matter what the situation was; anything Leah
did made me tight and aching. All I could do was try to ignore it
“Do you have family you can contact?” I asked reluctantly. Brooke’s father wasn’t still in the picture, I knew that much—after over a year of watching, I’d never seen a sign of any man in Leah’s life, thank fuck. I might’ve lost my shit long before now if I had.
Was he somehow involved with this?
I pushed the thought aside to examine later. “Do you have anyone you can contact who can help you like I can?”
Her dark eyes snapped to meet mine. “I can’t get past the fact that I haven’t seen you for a year and a half, Remi, and on the night my daughter is kidnapped, you miraculously reappear.”
I shrugged. “Just because you haven’t seen me doesn’t mean I haven’t seen you.”
“Don’t remind me. You’re definitely not helping your case.” She brought her hands up to rub her temples. “You have to be involved with this. There’s no other logical explanation.”
The words were weak, though, without the biting sting Leah could add when you pissed her off. She was holding on to the idea because it gave her some knowledge, some control in the midst of a confusing, chaotic world. I recognized the signs and couldn’t blame her. She could hang on to whatever she needed to—as long as she came with me.
“Well”—I stepped aside, raised a hand to usher her toward the hallway—“if I’m involved, you’d better stick to me like glue. What better way to find your daughter?”
She stared me down a moment longer, brown eyes wary. And worried. When they dropped to the ground and she moved toward me, I knew I had won.
“All right,” she said. “For now.”
Chapter Four
Leah —
I didn’t really care where Remi took me; all that mattered was being in close proximity to my phone. To the only lifeline I had to Brooke. Ross would call, and when he did, I needed to hear my daughter’s voice. That’s all I cared about now.
I had been staring, unseeing, out of the SUV’s window for I don’t know how long before we slowed and turned into a winding drive blocked by massive wrought-iron gates. Remi pulled to a stop and rolled down his window, waiting for the camera at the gate to recognize him. A buzz sounded, and the gate swung open. My gaze was on the massive stone house nearly a mile away, nestled in the arms of a forest on either side, as he drove through the entry.
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