“We’re going to take better care of you from now on.” Wayne said. “We were not happy when we found out how the label treated you.”
“It was my choice, guys. I took a gamble that once you got on the road and your album released, you were going to succeed.”
“You made it happen. You’re the one who booked the television and radio interviews and mini-performances, which drew attention to our work. You kept our social media current.”
She shrugged. “What can I say? I’m your biggest fan. I want you to soar and see God glorified in the process.”
“Inquiring minds want to know…are you and Niko dating?” Rocco asked with raised eyebrows.
Tia’s face grew warm, and she sipped her coffee slowly, grateful she hadn’t been drinking it when the question came up. Someone might have received a hot shower.
The men closest to him nudged Niko, and he smiled. “We’re exploring our relationship. Give us space, guys.”
“Well, in my opinion, you should wed quickly and come on the road with us as husband and wife.” Sam spoke.
Wayne chimed in. “That would free up a bunk.”
Johnny tapped a finger on the table. “We’re already modifying the bus. We could widen a berth at the back with extra privacy. It might be a good thing.”
Niko choked on his food, and Marc patted his back.
Tia’s tongue tied in a knot. Numbness settled over her. They had no clue they dangled the greatest prize before her, but she didn’t want him pushed into anything.
“Guys. Stop. Tia and I need to figure this out and seek God. Rushing into marriage is not a wise thing.” Niko dropped his fork.
“Either you love her or you don’t. Seems to me Tia’s had the hots for you for quite some time, and you get along and work well together. You’ve put in the time, in the studio and on the road. Waiting won’t make the decision safer.” Wayne was serious.
Tia shut down her laptop and stuffed her papers in her bag. They had already been here for several hours. She’d wanted to leave, but Niko was her ride. Fatigue dumped over her like a can of upended deep blue paint as her mood darkened. The doctor warned her. She’d maxed out her energy. A good excuse.
“Guys, I’ve reached my limit for today. Niko, would you drive me home? I need to take some medicine and rest.”
He nodded and stood. The jovial mood of the group sobered. She turned to them. “Good job with everything, guys. I’m proud to be associated with you.”
Sam picked up her bag and carried it to the car for her as she and Niko followed. He helped her settle into the front, and she melted into the hot vinyl and cloth seat. Buckled up, they drove home in silence. Only the blower for the air-conditioning was heard, even over the road noise. Parked out front of Ginny’s, she placed a hand on his arm.
“Nikolos?”
“Yeah. Hey, I’m sorry. I didn’t expect them to ambush us.”
“It’s okay. They care about you and want you happy.”
He turned to face her. “I think they are more concerned with you. Marriage provides a protection for your reputation as our audience grows. It also keeps me out of the cross hairs of jealous boyfriends.”
“But neither are great reasons for marriage.”
He frowned as he reached for her hand and held it. “Marriage is to glorify God. To show His love to the world. We would be serving together. I’m not opposed to marrying you, Tia. The guys are unaware of your nightmares. On the bus that impacts everyone…but as my wife, I could sing to you, calm you, and take care of you.”
“Or get your own jewels smashed on a regular basis.”
“We have several gigs in Texas. We’ll tell people I was bull-riding.” He grinned, and his dimple deepened. He tipped his head in towards hers. Their foreheads met, and he whispered. “Lord, please guide us. Marriage is a big decision, and while there are practical reasons to take that step, along with how much I desperately love and need this woman in my life, we want this to be your clear call to us.”
“Amen,” they chimed in together.
Tia stammered. “It wouldn’t be a good decision for the immediate future. I still have so much healing to do.”
He frowned, leaned his head back, and nodded. He had also wounded his wife. Wait. Wife? Whoa. Lord? Are you telling me yes?
“I need to go in.”
“I’ll help you out and walk you to the house.”
Once they were at the door, he set down her laptop bag.
“Thanks, Niko.”
“Tia, do you understand I’ve fallen in love with you?”
“I’d hoped. You realize I’ve loved you for a long time?”
“Yeah, I was a little slow to get the big picture. But I understand now and am grateful. I’m sorry I’ve hurt you so much.”
“That’s in the past. I need to rest.” She placed a kiss on his cheek and let herself in the house. She climbed the stairs to her room, took a pill, collapsed on the bed fully clothed—and fell fast asleep.
* * *
Niko drove to the river and sat on the bank, tossing stones in the water rushing by. There was so much to think about, including the brutality of the assault’s ripple effect.
Marrying Tia would be wonderful. He loved her. He needed her. She fit into his world and made it better. But the nightmares…and at times she shied away from his touch. Was it because he violated her trust or due to the attack? Would that ever get better? How long would it take for her to trust him again? Was there any chance she’d even accept him? He really wasn’t worthy of her after her years of faithfulness and loyalty.
If he were to watch her dating other guys, he’d likely explode. But he had paraded woman after woman in front of her over the years. Mostly first dates as they traveled but there had been a few he’d foolishly gone gaga over. She’d never said a word. Instead, she bottled it all up and poured it out into her writing. His assault was no better than Mr. Merkle’s, except his was a direct if unintentional barrage of bullets to her soft heart.
He didn’t want to go into marriage with only strong emotions and raging hormones. He wanted to be the shepherd and head of a home she deserved and desired. Did he even have that in him? And if he didn’t, how would they manage the tour with the passion sizzling between them without acting on it?
It is better to marry than burn…Didn’t the apostle Paul write something like that in Scripture? He rose and drove home. He got online and started to do some research and make a phone call.
* * *
Later in the day, Niko sat down with Pastor Dan Wink at Orchard Hill Church, who had served with him for years and mentored him as a worship leader. Niko joined one of the worship teams periodically when the band was home from tour, often leading worship when he did.
Dan waved him into the office. “Good to see you, Niko. I heard you’d blown back into town. How was the tour?”
Niko briefed him on the tour but mostly the last day and what had happened to Tia and his struggle. “I was so busy when she was in the hospital, I’m sorry the most I could do was send you a text. I appreciate your praying for Tia.”
“So…you want to know if you should marry her, but you’re conflicted because of the nightmares.”
“She shied from my touch today. As if I would ever hit her. How does one start a marriage with that? And we’ll be leaving on tour—how could I go and not be married to her and stay pure?”
“Whoa. First of all, her healing, and yours, will take time. Wisdom would probably say you should wait, but the band is right. There are valid reasons for taking the step now.”
“What if I make a mistake?”
“You could date Tia for seven years and still have that fear. You’ve known her for how long? Granted, she’s confessed to loving you that whole time, but you’ve not been reciprocal until now, what, three or more years later?”
“But what about, well, you know?”
“Just because you marry quickly doesn’t mean you have to force the issue of a physical intimat
e relationship. You can give her the space and the power to choose when and where and how it happens. As men, we don’t need much encouragement. She’s going to require lots of love and understanding. But that’s something you’ve not been compelled to provide in the past. She’d be taking a big gamble on you, more than you are on her.
“You can attend counseling with her, pray for her. Sing her through those nightmares. You can wait for the intimacy. I’m not saying it would be easy, but it can be done. It’s a sacrifice for you and not the way you normally enter a marriage, but you both could have a wonderful relationship, possibly even in bed, once you get through some of this initial trauma. Will it always be there? It might. It might not. You might be a big part of how well she can heal through this.”
Niko sighed. “I keep hearing a yes in my spirit in spite of the excuses I throw up to say no. I don’t want to act with anything less than wisdom.”
“Do you really love her? Seriously ponder that question. She saved your life, but gratitude isn’t enough reason to wed. Neither is lust. You work well together. You’ve come through some difficult circumstances and you’ll have things to negotiate, but if God leads you to the altar, He can also equip you along the way.”
“I have no clue how to be a husband.”
“What man ever really does? Except for what he witnesses modeled for him.”
“My dad was great. My parents still dance together, kiss, and hold hands. As a teenager, I found it embarrassing. Now I think it’s sweet.”
“Talk to your father. Have your parents met Tia yet? Might be a good next step.”
“Great idea. Thanks, Dan.” Niko nodded and rose to his feet.
“My pleasure. I’ll be praying for you both.”
Niko drove to his parents’ home.
His mother wrapped him in her arms, and his father smiled and waved a cigar at him.
“Hey Mom, Pops. I came to talk to the both of you. I need your help.”
They sat, and he once again poured out the events, his struggle, and the unanswered questions.
Pops fought some tears. “She saved your life. I’m grateful God spared you both to bring you to this kind of a struggle. Would you have noticed her if she hadn’t shown you such love?”
His mother reached over and gave him a hug. “My son. You make a mother proud. You would love this woman well. Marry her and trust God to work it out.”
“If we did marry, it would likely be soon, before the next tour.”
Pops smiled. “I’m proud of you. Tia sounds like an answer to years of prayers we deposited in Heaven towards this end. Bring her to dinner.” He glanced at is wife. “Tomorrow night. We won’t tell your siblings yet. Only the four of us, to eat and get acquainted with this woman who loves you.”
“I’ll ask her. Thanks.”
After more hugs, he left and drove back to Ginny’s home. It was after dinner now, having shared a meal with his parents. He knocked on the door and waited for Tia to come down.
“Can you manage a short stroll with me?”
She nodded and smiled at him as he enfolded her hand in his. They headed down the sidewalk toward a nearby park.
CHAPTER SIX
He who respects his parents never dies.
Greek proverb
His return surprised her, and her hand found a home in his. Warmth, protection, love. All the things she feared she would never experience she held on to tightly now. How long might this last?
“I’ve been doing a lot of praying, thinking, and checking out things with people I respect.”
“In only a few hours? I guess that’s good?”
He smiled at her. He swung their arms between them. “My parents want to meet you. They invited us over tomorrow night for dinner. And before you get nervous, you should know they already love you because I do. Well, and you did save my life. That might have helped.”
“Okay.”
“No other family—just the four of us so they can meet you and you can get acquainted with them.”
“It sounds wonderful.” She’d always wanted to meet the parents who had done such a wonderful job raising him. In a way, she was jealous of all he’d had in his life. He was wealthy in so many ways, rich in his family and relationships. She had the band and Stephanie, but beyond that, she was adrift in the world.
He walked her to a park bench near the playground filled with kids running, sliding, and swinging.
“What do you think you’ll do when touring is done and there are no more albums to record?” Tia asked.
Niko considered her, one eyebrow disappearing into his unruly dark curls. “That’s a great question. The music business is not always a long-term ride. I hope we could do this as a career and hold on for years to come, but much of that is out of our control. If it ends and I get the honor of settling down in a home with a picket fence, a dog, and eight kids…”
“Eight?” Tia loosened her hand from his.
“Just teasing. However many the Lord would bless us with? Anyway, another solo album—or perhaps become a worship minister. Worst case scenario, I give guitar lessons.”
“What breed of dog?” She folded her arms and tilted her head.
“Really? I don’t know. Do you have a preference?”
“Never had one before, so I don’t know. One that is protective and good with kids.”
“Size?”
“Medium to big. Too small and they don’t offer any tangible security.”
“Hmmmm. We’re not married but we’re already negotiating a pet?” He kissed her forehead. “I love you and long to build a life and family with you.”
She leaned into his shoulder and wrapped an arm around him. “I love you, too. I’m praying about it.”
“Should I decide to propose, is there a father I need to go to for permission to marry his daughter?”
“You could, but I don’t know that you’d want to.”
“Why?”
“My dad is in the federal penitentiary for white collar crimes. I’ve had no contact in ten years.”
“Your mother?”
“She passed away three years ago. She was my hero. She never divorced my father even though many told her to. She stayed faithful to her vows and visited dad every other week when she was well enough to.”
“I wish I could have met her.”
“She liked you. She knew who you were and heard your early music. She even pointed you out to me a few years back as you and the band played. She told me you were the man I should marry.”
“And what did you say?”
“From your mouth to God’s ears. Like he would ever look at me twice.”
“Her response?”
“She said true beauty goes beyond a figure and fancy clothes and makeup. A sweet spirit is more attractive to a man, and I had what you needed. You should understand she fancied herself a bit of a prophet, but rarely did anything she ever predict really happen. I think it was her way of gambling with no money and nothing to lose. Kind of a game between her and God but God kept showing her He knew best.”
“How’d she die?”
“Liver disease from alcoholism. For all her good qualities, she had a problem. She drank at home, didn’t bother anyone, and always did her job. The damage was the same, though, as if she did.”
His arms enfolded her. “I’m sorry. Is that why you stick to water, tea, or soda when we go out?”
He’d even noticed that? Shocker. “Yeah, and to avoid the appearance of evil. I don’t want to give someone permission to stumble if it’s an issue for them.”
“Kind of my thinking. Not opposed, but abstain for the most part.”
“Did you ever try it?”
“Sure, what newly emancipated adult doesn’t? Never got drunk, though. Didn’t find much that really appealed to me, so it wasn’t an issue.”
Tia shivered but didn’t want to leave the warmth of his arms for the walk home.
“You’re cold. Summer evenings can get chilly, and you’re
still healing. I shouldn’t have kept you out. Let’s head back. We have more to discuss I’m sure, but we can do that another day.”
They walked home hip to hip, and at the door, she stretched up and wrapped an arm around his neck. Their lips met, and she drank deeply of the unconditional love he offered. He pulled back.
“Wow,” she gasped.
He smiled. “You’re pretty amazing too, Tia. Rest well. I’ll see you tomorrow around five?”
“Sounds good. Sweet dreams.”
“Sweet dreams to you too.”
He walked away, and she went inside to hold the memory close.
* * *
The next day, she did some work for the band and attempted to concentrate on character sketches for a story she planned to write.
Anxiety interfered with her ability to focus, so she finally gave up and called her friend Stephanie.
“Hey, girlfriend. How are you feeling?” Stephanie asked.
“Still pretty sore, but I need help on a heart issue.”
“Well, I’m no expert there. You remember me telling you how I mucked it up with Luis and what happened as a result of that fiasco.”
“True, but in the end, you have a hunky husband and beautiful baby.”
“Yes, I do. Okay, fire it at me. What’s going on?”
“I’ve always pined for Niko.”
“Who hasn’t? The guy’s a hottie who sings.”
“Steph…” Tia warned.
“Okay, so you’ve been weak-at-the-knees for the lead singer of the band, and he’s never noticed you. I kind of figured from little hints you’ve let drop over the past few months.”
“What do you mean?”
“You talk about Nikolos differently than the rest of the band. With longing and sighs. It wouldn’t take an idiot to realize you had a crush on him but that it was all one-way.”
“I think it’s more than a crush, and the one-way? True, at least until now.”
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