ponderablematterthatseemedtometoclearawaycertainlogicaldifficultieswhich
alwayshaveseemedtopersistintheeffortstoreconcileTranscendentBeingwiththe
physical universe. The idea is that ponderable matter—meaning by that term all thingssensedwhethergrossorsubtle—is,infact,arelativeabsenceofsubstance,a
sortofpartialvacuum.AtthepresenttimeIshallnotdeveloptheevidenceandlogic
supporting this idea, though this was outlined in my consciousness during the days followingtheoriginofit.Thesignificantpointinconnectionwiththepresentrecord
istheeffectthisideahaduponmyownconsciousness.Itseemstohavehadavital
partinclearingthewayfortheIlluminationthatcamelater.Thiseffectwasproduced
in the following manner: Habitually we regard the material filling of sensation as beingsubstantial.Tooffsetthis,wemayhavebeentheoreticallyconvincedthat so-calledemptyspaceisnotonlyfilled,butactuallymoresubstantialthantheportions
ofitoccupiedbyponderablematter.Thisideaisnotnewtometaphysics,andmuch
intheliteratureofmodernphysicsisnotincompatiblewithit.ButIhavefoundthat
ideas received from outer sources, even though in convincing form, lack the power overconsciousnesspossessedbyanoriginalidea. Theeffectofthisideawithmewas a far more effective acceptance of substantial reality where the senses reported emptiness, and a greater capacity to realize unreality—or merely dependent and derivativereality—inthematerialgiventhroughthesenses.
There are further prior pertinent factors which, it seems, should be noted. About eighteen months ago there began a series of conversations with one whom I
recognizedasaSage.IcheckedthevalidityofmyrecognitionofthisOneinevery
waythatIcouldandprovedHisgenuinenesstomycompletesatisfaction.Iactedon
His word when I could not see clearly and found that clarity gradually unfolded.
ActinguponHissuggestions,Sherifa—mywife—andIundertookaphaseofpublic
worknothithertoattempted.Bothofusfoundasweprogressedintheworkagradual
growth of understanding that has steadily brought Light where there had been
obscurity. Among other things this Sage suggested my correlation with a previous incarnationofspecialimportance.HeadvisedmethatHewasnot,andcouldnotbe,
my personal Guru, as that relationship was dependent upon alignments that are not arbitrary.
In the past, two important Recognitions have come to me. First, nearly fourteen yearsago,inasettingwhichitisnotnecessarytodelineate,Isuddenlyrecognized“I amAtman.” This effectedimportant changes of outlookthat persisted. Second,less than one year ago, while engaged in the public work mentioned above, and while deeply interested in a book giving a report of a living Indian Sage, I also suddenly recognizedthatNirvanaisnotafield,orspace,orworldwhichoneenteredandthat
contained one as space might contain an external object, but rather that “I am identical with Nirvana, and always have been and always will be so.” This
Recognitionlikewisehaditspersistenteffectsuponthepersonalconsciousness.
136
WearenowreadytoreturntotheRecognitionoftendaysago.Isay“Recognition”
rather than “experience” for a very definite reason. Properly it was not a case of experientialknowledge,whichisknowledgefromthesenseswhethergrossorsubtle,
norknowledgefromdeduction,thoughbothforms,particularlythelatter,havehelped
in a subsidiary sense. It was an Awakening to a Knowledge which I can best representbycallingitKnowledgethroughIdentityandthustheprocess—insofaras
we can speak of process in this connection at all—is best expressed by the word
“Recognition.”
I had been sitting in a porch swing, reading as previously stated. Ahead of the sequenceinthebook,Iturnedtothesectiondevotedto“Liberation,”asIseemedto
feelanespecialhungerforthis.Icoveredthematerialquicklyanditallseemedvery
clearandsatisfactory.Then,asIsatafterwarddwellinginthoughtuponthesubject
just read, suddenly it dawned upon me that a common mistake made in the higher meditation—i.e., meditation for Liberation—is the seeking for a subtle object of Recognition, in other words, something that could be experienced. Of course, I had longknownthefalsenessofthispositiontheoretically,yethadfailedtorecognizeit.
(Here is a subtle but very important distinction.) At once, I dropped expectation of havinganythinghappen.Then,witheyesopenandnosensestoppedinfunctioning—
hence no trance—I abstracted the sub-jective moment—the “I AM” or “Atman”
element—from the totality of the objective consciousness manifold. Upon this I focused. Naturally, I found what, from the relative point of view, is Darkness and Emptiness. ButIRealizedItasAbsoluteLightandFullnessandthatIwasThat.Of course, I cannot tell what IT was in Its own nature. The relative forms of consciousness inevitably distort nonrelative Consciousness. Not only can I not tell thistoothers,Icannotevencontainitwithinmyownrelativeconsciousness,whether
of sensation, feeling, or thought. Every metaphysical thinker will see this
impossibility at once. I was even prepared not to have the personal consciousness share in this Recognition in any way. But in this I was happily disappointed.
PresentlyIfelttheAmbrosia-qualityinthebreathwiththepurifyingbenedictionthat
itcastsoverthewholepersonality,evenincludingthephysicalbody.Ifoundmyself
abovetheuniverse,notinthesenseofleavingthephysicalbodyandbeingtakenout
in space, but in the sense of being above space, time, and causality. My karma seemed to drop away from me as an individual responsibility. I felt intangibly, yet wonderfully, free. I sustained this universe and was not bound by it. Desires and ambitions grew perceptibly more and more shadowy. All worldly honors were
withoutpowertoexaltme.Physicallifeseemedundesirable.Repeatedly,throughthe
daysthatfollowed,Iwasinastateofdeepbrooding,thinkingthoughtsthatwereso
abstract that there were no concepts to represent them. I seemed to comprehend a veritablelibraryofKnowledge,alllessconcretethanthemostabstractmathematics.
Thepersonalityrestedinagentleglowofhappiness,butwhileitwasverygentle,yet
itwassopotentastodullthekeenestsensuousdelight.Likewisethesenseofworld-
pain was absorbed. I looked, as it were, over the world, asking: “What is there of interest here? What is there worth doing?” I found but one interest: the desire that othersoulsshouldalsorealizethisthatIhadrealized,forinitlaytheoneeffective keyforthesolvingoftheirproblems.Thelittletragediesofmenleftmeindifferent.I sawonegreatTragedy,thecauseofalltherest,thefailureofmantorealizehisown
137
Divinity.Isawbutonesolution,theRealizationofthisDivinity.
From PathwaysThroughtoSpacebyFranklinMerrell-Woolf.
138
PEACEPILGRIM
139
TWENTY
PEACEPILGRIM
EARLY1900S–1981,UNITEDSTATES
I SHALL REMAIN a wanderer until mankind has learned the way of peace, walking untilIamgivenshelterandfa
stinguntilIamgivenfood.”Soborethewhitelettersof thetunicofthissurrenderedanddeterminedsoulasshetraversedmorethan25,000
milesonfootforpeace.Whenquestionedaboutherpersonalhistory,PeacePilgrim
repliedthatshehadnoothernameandnohome,otherthanaforwardingaddressin
New Jersey, and revealed only that she came from a poor family, received little formal education, possessed no special talents, and led a guided life. Peace Pilgrim saw no purpose in discussing her age. “As long as I counted birthdays and started thinking about getting older, I did get older. Age is a state of mind, and I think of myselfasageless.”
BornonasmallfarmontheEastCoastsometimeintheearly1900s,PeacePilgrim
grew from modest roots, acquired money and material positions, then realized the futility of worldly goods and a self-centered life. This led to an all-night vigil of walking through the woods culminating in “a complete willingness, without any
reservations, to give my life to God and to service.” Adopting a life of voluntary simplicity,sheembarkedonafifteen-yearperiodofengaginginvolunteerworkfor
peace groups and with individuals suffering from physical, emotional, and mental problems.
OnthemorningofJanuary1,1953,PeacePilgrimtookhervowtowalkforpeace.
She was clad in a navy blue shirt and slacks, and her pocketed tunic contained her fewworldlypossessions:acomb,foldingtoothbrush,pen,copiesofhermessage,and
her current correspondence. Over the next eleven years, this silver-haired
phenomenon walked 25,000 miles, after which time she continued her mission,
thoughshestoppedcountingmiles,untilherdeathin1981.Hergrowingdemandas
aninspirationalspeakerledhertoacceptrideswhennecessary.
PeacePilgrimspokewiththousandsofpeopleinallfiftystates,alloftheCanadian
provinces, and parts of Mexico during the McCarthy era, the Korean and Vietnam wars,andafterward.Whetheratatruckstoporduringanationalradioortelevision
interview, on a dusty road, in a ghetto, or lecturing at a university, Peace Pilgrim's message for peace remained clear and consistent. Sleeping beside the road, in bus stations, and on beaches when no home was offered, she never considered personal dangeranissue.
At the time of her death, Peace Pilgrim was crossing the United States for the seventhtime.Shemadewhatshecalled“theglorioustransitiontoafreerlife”onJuly 7,1981,dyinginstantlyinahead-oncollisionasshewasbeingdriventoyetanother
engagement. In her final newspaper interview, she had spoken of being in radiant 140
health. On a taped radio program the day before she died, the host remarked, “You seemtobeamosthappywoman.”PeacePilgrimresponded,“Icertainlyamahappy
person.HowcouldoneknowGodandnotbejoyous?”
PeacePilgrim'senlightenmentstoryisexcerptedfromherinspiringautobiography,
PeacePilgrim:HerLifeandMessage.
141
WALKINGFORWORLDPEACE
THESE ARE my steps toward inner peace that I wanted to share with you. There is nothingnewaboutthis.Thisisuniversaltruth.Imerelytalkedaboutthesethingsin
everydaywordsintermsofmyownpersonalexperiencewiththem.Thelawswhich
governthisuniverseworkforgoodassoonasweobeythem,andanythingcontrary
to these laws doesn't last long. It contains within itself the seeds of its own destruction. The good in every human life always makes it possible for us to obey theselaws.Wedohavefreewillaboutallthis,andthereforehowsoonweobeyand
therebyfindharmony,bothwithinourselvesandwithinourworld,isuptous.
DuringthisspiritualgrowingupperiodIdesiredtoknowanddoGod'swillforme.
Spiritualgrowthisnoteasilyattained,butitiswellworththeeffort.Ittakestime,just asanygrowthtakestime.Oneshouldrejoiceatsmallgainsandnotbeimpatient,as
impatiencehampersgrowth.
The path of gradual relinquishment of things hindering spiritual progress is a difficultpath,foronlywhenrelinquishmentiscompletedotherewardsreallycome.
Thepathofquickrelinquishmentisaneasypath,foritbringsimmediateblessings.
AndwhenGodfillsyourlife,God'sgiftsoverflowtoblessallyoutouch.
Tome,itwasanescapefromtheartificialityofillusionintotherichnessofreality.
To the world it may seem that I had given up much. I had given up burdensome possessions, spending time meaninglessly doing things I knew I should not do and notdoingthingsIknewIshoulddo.ButtomeitseemedthatIhadgainedmuch—
eventhepricelesstreasuresofhealthandhappiness.
TheAttainmentofInnerPeace
There were hills and valleys, lots of hills and valleys, in that spiritual growing up period. Then in the midst of the struggle there came a wonderful mountaintop experience—thefirstglimpseofwhatthelifeofinnerpeacewaslike.
ThatcamewhenIwasoutwalkingintheearlymorning.AllofasuddenIfeltvery
uplifted, more uplifted than I had ever been. I remember I knew timelessness and spacelessnessand lightness.Ididnotseemtobewalkingontheearth.Therewereno people or even animals around, but every flower, every bush, every tree seemed to wear a halo. There was a light emanation around everything and flecks of gold fell likeslantedrainthroughtheair.Thisexperienceissometimescalledtheillumination
period.
Themostimportantpartofitwasnotthephenomena:theimportantpartofitwas
the realization of the oneness of all creation. Not only all human beings—I knew beforethatallhumanbeingsareone.ButnowIknewalsoaonenesswiththerestof
creation. The creatures that walk the earth and the growing things of the earth. The air,thewater,theearthitself.And,mostwonderfulofall, aonenesswiththatwhich permeatesallandbindsalltogetherandgiveslifetoall.Aonenesswiththatwhich manywouldcallGod.
I have never felt separate since. I could return again and again to this wonderful mountaintop, and then I could stay there for longer and longer periods of time and 142
justslipoutoccasionally.
The inspiration for the pilgrimage came at this time. I sat high upon a hill overlooking rural New England. The day before I had slipped out of harmony, and the evening before I had thought to God, “It seems to me that if I could always remain in harmony I could be of greater usefulness—for every time I slip out of harmonyitimpairsmyusefulness.”
WhenIawokeatdawnIwasbackonthespiritualmountaintopwithawonderful
feeling.IknewthatIwouldneverneedtodescendagainintothevalley.Iknewthat
formethestrugglewasover,thatfinallyIhadsucceededingivingmylifeorfinding
inner peace. Again this is a point of no return. You can never go back into the struggle. The struggle is over now because you will to do the right thing and you don'tneedtobepushedintoit.
IwentoutforatimealonewithGod.WhileIwasoutathoughtstruckmymind:I
felt a strong inner motivation toward the pilgrimage—toward this special way of witnessingforpeace.
I saw, in my mind's eye, myself walking along and wearing the garb of my
mission….IsawamapoftheUnitedStateswiththelargecitiesmarked—anditwas
; asthoughsomeonehadtakenacoloredcrayonandmarkedazigzaglineacross,coast
to coast and border to border, from Los Angeles to New York City. I knew what I wastodo.Andthatwasavisionofmyfirstyear'spilgrimageroutein1953!
I entered a new and wonderful world. My life was blessed with a meaningful
purpose.
However,progresswasnotover.Greatprogresshastakenplaceinthisthirdphase
ofmylife.It'sasthoughthecentralfigureofthejigsawpuzzleofmylifeiscomplete andclearandunchanging,andaroundtheedgesotherpieceskeepfittingin.Thereis
alwaysagrowingedge,buttheprogressisharmonious.Thereisafeelingofalways
beingsurroundedbyallofthegoodthings,likeloveandpeaceandjoy.Itseemslike
a protective surrounding, and there is an unshakeableness within which takes you throughanysituationyoumayneedtoface.
The world may look at you and believe that you are facing great problems, but alwaystherearetheinnerresourcestoeasilyovercometheproblems.Nothingseems
difficult.Thereisacalmnessandaserenityandunhurriedness—nomorestrivingor
strainingaboutanything.That'saveryimportantthingI'velearned.Ifyourlifeisin harmonywithyourpartintheLifePattern,andifyouareobedienttothelawswhich
govern this universe, then life is full and life is good but life is nevermore overcrowded.Ifitisovercrowded,thenyouaredoingmorethanisrightforyoutodo
—morethanisyourjobtodointhetotalschemeofthings.
Nowthereisalivingtogiveinsteadoftoget.Asyouconcentrateonthegiving,
youdiscoverthatjustasyoucannotreceivewithoutgiving,soneithercanyougive
without receiving—even the most wonderful things like health and happiness and innerpeace.Thereisafeelingofendlessenergy,itjustneverrunsout,itseemstobe asendlessasair.Youseemtobepluggedintothesourceofuniversalenergy.
You are now in control of your life. Your higher nature, which is controlled by God,controlsthebody,mind,andemotions.(Theegoisneverreallyincontrol.The
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