by CK Dawn
“How did you change?” Beth asked.
“A close friend told me differently. He said if I couldn’t accept myself, how could others? That stuck with me. It took time, but eventually I accepted that this is the body I was born with and I began to love it.” Dropping into a crouch, she popped a piece of bread into her mouth and chewed, watching as the women absorbed what she had said. She swallowed and continued. “Stop looking for flaws in yourself and embrace the beauty. Each and every one of you are beautiful. I see it, and Hayjen here sees it.” Lilja brushed Mer’s white blond hair out of her face and stood. “Thank you for the wonderful conversation. I hope to have dinner with you all later.”
She turned her back and allowed herself a smile as the conversation continued with them telling each other what they appreciated about each other. Quiet steps followed her. “Yes?” she said, turning abruptly to speak with whoever was following her. Lilja’s nose came in contact with a very broad chest. One that smelled extremely pleasing.
She didn’t expect that.
Lilja stepped back and tipped her head back to meet his gaze.
Ice eyes.
Stunning face.
Silky hair.
He was too damn attractive.
And moved like a griffin.
She was in trouble.
Five
Hayjen
Her magenta eyes stared into his with, if he wasn’t mistaken, a hint of attraction.
Well, good. She was too bloody beautiful to look at. It would only be fair if she thought he was attractive as well. Hayjen put those thoughts away for later and focused on what he had to say to her.
“Thank you.”
She blinked. “You’re welcome.”
Hayjen hooked a thumb over his shoulder. “For in there.” The captain’s brilliant smile about blinded him.
“They are wonderful. They deserve to feel that way.”
“They are coming back to life.”
Her lips pursed as she peered around his shoulder. “It will be a long time before they will heal. Right now they are running on a high of being free, of being out of danger.” Her eyes moved to his. “Soon enough they’ll drop and we’ll have to keep an eye on them.”
“We’ll?” he questioned.
“It will be three weeks until we reach the cove near Sanee,” she explained.
“So long?” He was hoping to get to his sister sooner than that.
“Scythia is a long way from Sanee, and I am only repeating what my first mate told me.”
“Blair?”
“Yes, Blair.”
Something in her tone made him pause. There was more feeling in her voice than he would have expected to hear if she was talking about a typical crew member. His heart sank a little bit—despite himself, he was intrigued by this female creature. “I would like to speak with you and your first mate this evening if possible.”
“That can be arranged. I will fetch you when dinner is served. Now if you’ll excuse me.”
She sauntered down the hallway, every step fluid like she was dancing. The captain was great with the girls, but he couldn’t help but being suspicious. Was she after something else? Hayjen shook his head. What could she be after? They didn’t have anything of value other than their skin. But again his skeptical side reared its head. No one did anything for nothing.
He turned and shuffled down the hallway and into the galley. The gaggle of girls were smiling and complimenting each other. The smile on his face came freely at the sight of their affection and kindness. Carefully, he lowered himself to a large purple pillow surrounding the low table. Beth and Jess cast smiles in his direction but kept on with their conversations.
“What’s the first thing you’re going to do when you get home?” Jess asked.
“Hug my family,” Beth quietly replied.
Hayjen watched them, marveling at how free they looked. He would have done everything in his power to help these women escape, but there at the end he hadn’t thought they were going to make it.
A little white-blonde head plopped down next to him and snuggled into his side. Mer. Automatically, he wrapped his arm around her. He stared down at the crown of her head in awe and terror. In awe that such a precious creature was under his care. In terror that he would find her family and have to hand her over. Also, if he was honest, terrified that she was under his care. Hayjen planned on having a family, but not until he passed his thirty-fifth year. That was still seven years down the road. He dropped a kiss on to the sleepy little girl’s head and settled on his side to make her more comfortable, even though it pulled on his wounds.
“Love you,” Mer whispered.
Hayjen brushed the hair from her face and tipped her chin up, brushing his nose against hers. “Love you too, Mer.” She gave him a gap-toothed smile before falling asleep curled into his side. He looked over her sweet face and marveled at her innocence. He glanced up to see most of the women staring at him with affection.
“How did I get so lucky?” he asked no one in particular.
“She’s the lucky one. We all are,” Lera spoke up.
Hayjen looked down at Mer, watching her eyes flicker behind her lids. “I don’t know how to care for her.”
“You’ve done a good enough job so far,” whispered a gangly girl named Belle.
“She was almost eaten by Leviathan.” The words tasted sour in his mouth.
“But she wasn’t,” soothed Lera.
“What will I do if I can’t find her family?” He looked up at the girls. “I will need to work to support her. Who will stay home and care for her? Teach her? I know nothing of little girls, other than my sister.”
“Where is your sister?”
Hayjen’s lips thinned. “I don’t know. She’s unmarried and we’ve no family. If I wasn’t there to provide for her—”He sucked in a breath. “I’ve been gone for months.”
“If she’s anything like you, she will be just fine when we return to Aermia. And if you can’t find Mer’s family, you’ll have your sister to help care for her.”
That could work, but it felt like Gwen was still a little girl, too. He had raised her after their parents had died, so she’d always be young to him.
Looking around the room, Hayjen asked, “How are you all really?”
Belle’s brown eyes met his then dropped to the pillow she sat on as she fiddled with a string. “The crew have treated us well, and they feed us.” A pause. “The nightmares are still there.”
He nodded. “Those I fear will take some time to abate.”
“The men are kind,” blurted Beth.
Hayjen turned to her with a raised brow.
Her cheeks colored, but she didn’t drop her eyes. “They don’t look at us with disgust and lust like the slavers did.” She shivered slightly. “They don’t yell or raise their voices around us. I’ve never caught any of them gazing at us with anything but curiosity and pity.”
“Hmmm…” he hummed.
“The captain assigned us jobs on the second day we were here,” Lera spoke. “She said it would help to get back to normal.” She shrugged. “When you’re busy, you don’t have time to dwell on the negatives in your life.”
“Have they questioned any of you?” he asked.
“The captain and her first mate have probed, but they haven’t interrogated us if that’s what you’re worried about.”
“A kind pirate, go figure,” he mumbled.
“Never judge.”
“Yes, mum,” Hayjen grumbled with a smile.
Lera arched a brow and shook her head at him. “Cheeky devil.”
“The captain informed me that it would be three weeks until we reach Aermia.”
Silence.
“Well, we’ve been on a ship for this long, what’s another couple of weeks?” Beth remarked. “Plus, some of us don’t know what we are returning home to.”
His gaze narrowed on the girl. “Will you be in danger?”
She waved a hand. “Nothing like
that. I was betrothed before I was taken. I’m not sure I will be when I return.”
“He’d be a fool to turn you away.”
Her smile was wan. “If only all men had your ideals, Hayjen.”
“Then he’s not worthy.”
“Kind words.”
His back decided to protest at his position, causing him to wince. “I think I need to lie down for a bit.” Hayjen extracted himself from Mer and stumbled to his feet. Lera adjusted Mer on the pillows and smiled at him.
“We’ll watch over her. Rest.”
Nodding, he shuffled out of the room, his eyes heavy. Hayjen managed to make it back to his room, ignoring his curiosity to explore the captain’s study. He crashed onto the bed. The pain receded. He breathed a sigh of relief and closed his eyes.
Hayjen slept away the afternoon and was surprised when he woke to only a sliver of light glimmering over the horizon. It took a while to pull off his soiled pants, clean up, and don the new clothing left by someone. He laced the billowing white linen shirt loosely around his throat, pleased to find that the cloth didn’t irritate his wounds. The brown leather pants fit him perfectly, and he wondered offhandedly how they knew his size. He shrugged it off as not being important.
Now, as he entered the captain’s study, he took his time. He shuffled over to the bookshelf, running his fingers along the colorful spines. She loved books—that was clear. His eyes moved to her organized desk—not a thing out of place. So she liked things just so. He filed that away. Color saturated everything he saw. It fit her. Wild color everywhere. Yet somehow they all mixed together in a way that was pleasing.
Finishing his perusal, he left her study and went out onto the deck. Men were scattered everywhere, sitting on barrels or crates. Some nodded to him as he passed them on his way to the rail. He leaned against it, watching the last of the sun’s rays disappear. There wasn’t anything more beautiful than the sun setting on the ocean. He sucked in a deep breath, savoring the salty crisp air and the symphony of waves crashing against the ship.
Peace.
It had been forever since he felt a measure of peace. After his parents had died, it had always been about feeding and raising Gwen. She was eight years his junior and needed someone to take care of her. Once captured, it became about protecting the girls and Mer. He was weary to his bones. No wonder he had been sleeping for days—he had been sleeping with one eye open most of the time for months. But being here, now, in this moment, there was nothing but the sea breeze rustling his hairs and the waves below him. A smile tugged at his lips as light footsteps moved in his direction.
So much for peace and quiet.
Mer’s little hand slipped into his and to his surprise, she stayed silent, staring out at the dark waves. After a while, she shifted into his side to block some of the wind.
“Are you cold?” he asked softly.
“No, I just wanted to hug you. I miss my papa.”
Hayjen knelt and pulled her into his arms for a hug. Her little arms wrapped around his neck, her face pressed into his chest. Her statement broke his heart. “We’ll find them.”
She shook her head. “You won’t.”
He let go of her and cupped her cheeks, staring into her unique eyes. “I’ll search for them. I will look forever if I have to, but while I look for them, will you stay with me?”
Her serious little face searched his. “I’ll stay with you, but…you can’t find mama and papa.”
“Why?” Had the Scythians done something to her parents? Mer rarely spoke of them.
“You can’t live in the sea.”
His brows furrowed as he stared at her in confusion. Live in the sea? “What do you mean?”
She bit her lip, eyes darting around the deck. “It’s a secret.”
“What is, baby girl?”
“Mama and papa said to never tell anyone, because it would put me I danger.”
What in the bloody hell? Hayjen took a calming breath. “Have I ever hurt you, Mer?”
“No. You love me.”
“That’s right, and I will never let anyone hurt you. I need you to tell me the truth so I can find your family.”
“They live underwater.”
Hayjen blinked. “Underwater?” he questioned.
Her face jerked up and down in his hands. “Yes.”
He barely kept the scowl from his face. Someone had been telling her old fish tales. “That’s an interesting story. Thank you for telling me.”
Mer beamed at him and pulled his hands from her face. “Are you hungry?”
“I’m always hungry.”
“Come on, then.”
She pulled him from the rail and to the galley, skipping along the deck waving and calling out hellos to the rough-looking pirates who all returned her waves and greetings with large smiles. Out of habit, Hayjen had searched the men for anything untoward.
Nothing.
Just affection.
He’d been on that damn Scythian ship too long. He was paranoid.
Hayjen forced his shoulders to loosen as he followed the little girl to the galley filled with the decadent smell of freshly baked bread. His eyes widened at how many people were packed into the space. Laughter, jokes, and smiles filled the room. Something loosened in his chest at the sound. It had been a long time since he had experienced this kind of camaraderie. Right in the middle of all of it was Captain Femi. She sniggered at something and punched her first mate in the arm before catching Hayjen’s eye.
“Sleeping beauty awakes!” she hollered over the din.
Chuckles ripped through the group as her first mate stood and made his way towards Hayjen. “Pay no mind to her. They procured some type of tuna for dinner and she’s overly excited about it.” The man held out his arm. “We’ve not met officially. I’m Blair, first mate of the Sirenidae.”
He clasped Blair’s arm. “I’m Hayjen.”
“Guardian of Mer.”
“Yes.”
Blair’s severe face cracked into a soft smile. “She’s a lovely little girl.”
“She is indeed.”
The first mate slapped him on the back and gestured to the serving line. “Fill up and eat, then we’ll discuss whatever is plaguing you.”
He watched as Blair wound around the group and slipped in next to the captain. She moved without looking at him, putting bread on his plate. The first mate plucked the bread from the plate and plopped his extra fish onto her plate. Each move was unconsciously coordinated, like they had done it a million times before. It was intimate in an understated way. If they weren’t together, he’d ride a Leviathan.
Hayjen thanked the cook as he dished up his plate. He spun and scanned the room for the girls. They were huddled in the corner eating and watching the display of pirates like it was a play. Carefully, he navigated the throng of people, managing not to spill his plate. Beth held her hands up for his plate so he could sit without pulling his back. “Thank you.”
She set his plate on the low table and winked. “It was nothing.”
He blinked. Where had that come from? “How are you ladies this evening?”
A murmur of “good” sounded around him before they went back to watching the spectacle of pirates with curiosity. What he noticed though, was that each bowl that had been placed down on the table looked like it had been licked clean. They understood the value of food and what it was like to go without. He doubted any of them would leave leftovers anytime soon.
The pirates finished their food and eventually filtered out of the galley, the girls slipping out a couple at a time. Soft music filtered in from outside, jovial in its tune.
“Music?” Hayjen asked the few remaining women without addressing any one of them in particular.
“They play every night,” Lera explained, unfolding from her pillow.
“Huh.” The crew weren’t what he expected when he thought of pirates. “Not all that pirate-like are they?”
Lera grinned at him. “Not what I imagined.”
Her eyes darted to the captain and first mate who hadn’t moved from their seats, and back to Mer pestering the cook. “I’ll take Mer so you can speak with the captain.”
“Thank you, Lera. I’d appreciate it.”
“Let’s listen to the music, Mer.” Lera offered her hand.
The little girl shoved the rest of her bread in her pocket and skipped over to grab Lera’s hand. “Let’s go.”
Hayjen watched with a bemused smile as Mer skipped out of the galley dragging Lera behind her.
“She’s adventurous.”
“Yes, she is.” Hayjen commented before turning to the captain standing over him. His eyes roved up her long leather-clad legs and tapered waist, and paused when he met her eyes. The color was so different from anything he had ever seen. Exotic, and unearthly. Her brows raised in question at his stare. “Sorry,” he mumbled. “Your eyes still intrigue me.”
The deep chuckled that poured from her throat sounded way too sensual. “You and everyone else. My crew still stares at them sometimes and they’ve been with me for years.”
He cocked his head, scanning her face. She couldn’t be that old, maybe 24. “Years?”
“The sea has been my home all my life.”
Ah. She had been raised on a ship. That made sense. “Was this your family’s ship?”
“I inherited it, yes.”
Smiling, he hefted himself from the low pillows and stared down at her. Her answers were answers, but vague. What was she hiding? “So where shall we speak?”
“In the study.”
Hayjen blinked and looked over the captain’s shoulder at Blair. He’d forgotten the first mate was even there. He stepped aside to let the captain and first mate lead the way. His nose twitched as he stepped into her study, citrus permeating the room in a clean, pleasant way. He moved to the side and sat in one of the chairs Captain Femi gestured to. Her first mate closed the door and moved to her side.