by Mac Flynn
"You must learn to control your thoughts when you see a member of the opposite sex. If you can control your thoughts then you can control the succubus energy you exude," he explained.
"That's easier said than done," I retorted as Ann helped me to my feet.
"That wasn't a bad try for your first time. He didn't remove any of your clothes," David pointed out.
Tiffany marched up to him and jabbed a finger into his chest. "Listen, bub, you can't help Liz if she's knocked out cold by your little zombie here."
David looked her in the eyes with a steady, firm gaze. "And nobody can help her if she doesn't keep trying."
"It's fine, Tiff," I spoke up.
She turned to me with pursed lips and pointed an accusing finger at the zombie. "But he could have done a lot more than just tear off your clothes!" she argued.
"But he didn't, and that was thanks to him," I pointed out.
Tiffany bit her lip, but her shoulders slumped and she sighed. Her narrowed eyes flickered to David. "All right, we can keep doing this, but snap to it a little faster next time, got it?"
David bowed his head. "I will."
"Good. Now let's get this teaching over with."
Chapter 3
It was a long night with a hard floor. After the second concussion against my hard floor I lost count of how many times the guy jumped me. By the time the clock struck midnight I was bruised, battered and exhausted. My head hurt, my bones creaked, and the most progress I could make was glaring at the guy and hating his very appearance.
"Ah!" I yelped as he took me down like a horny linebacker. In a moment he was back up, but I lay stretched on the floor. "Uncle," I croaked.
David's face came into my view along with those of my two friends and Mo's. The incubus' lips were pursed as he looked over me. "You have made little progress," he pointed out.
"No, I've made great progress on shattering every bone in my body," I argued.
Ann bit her lower lip and looked to David. "She doesn't look too good," she commented.
"She is fine," he argued.
"No, I'm not," I groaned.
"Give the girl a break," Tiffany growled at him.
"She wished to learn," he reminded her.
"Not about this much pain," I moaned. Tiffany helped me sit up and I rubbed my aching arms and head. "I think we need to call it quits for tonight before I'm blacker than Mo."
The feline twitched its tail. "Your coat looks rather more uneven," he retorted.
"Yeah, and it feels that way, too," I quipped.
David sighed, but nodded his head. "I suppose the hour is late, and I have duties to attend to."
"And you have to take the guy back," Ann spoke up.
David stood and looked over his captive. The stranger stood as still as a statue, but I could see a few bruises on his face where he'd collided with my hard head. "Yes. I will have to find another suitable young man for tomorrow evening."
I cringed. "I think I need one night's vacation. You know, so the bruises don't get bruises."
David bowed his head. "If that's what you wish."
I rotated an arm and winced at the pain. "That's what I need."
"Very well. I will return the night after tomorrow. Until then." He bowed to us and left with his captive.
A small part of me was sad to see him go. It was one of the few parts not bruised to pieces by his unorthodox training method. Ann and Tiffany helped me over to the couch where I collapsed on the cushion.
I leaned against the back and groaned. "This is a terrible way to die. . ." I muttered.
Tiffany plopped herself beside me and glared at the door through which David had gone. "He's a real psychopath," she commented.
"I think he's just very patient," Ann argued as she sat on my other side.
"The crazy ones always are," Tiffany retorted.
I shifted atop my cushion and winced. "Anybody mind getting me an ice pack for my body?" I pleaded.
"No problem!" Tiffany agreed.
"I'll help!" Ann chimed in.
With their powers combined I was soon covered from head-to-foot in packs of ice stuffed into plastic bags. My bruised body numbed below the neck, but I sighed in relief. I closed my eyes and sank into the cushion.
"You gonna be okay?" Tiffany spoke up.
I nodded. "Yeah, I think so. Not much good for work tomorrow, but I think I can make it."
"Lenin would probably fire you if you didn't show up," Ann agreed.
"You shouldn't go, anyway. He can just stuff it," Tiffany argued.
I sighed and leaned forward. Some of the ice packs fell away. "I may be turning into a succubus, but I still have to eat and pay rent," I reminded her.
"If you're turning into a succubus then you can at least enjoy your time as a human," she insisted.
I cringed and looked away. Ann scowled at me other friend. "Tiffany. . ." she whispered.
Tiffany shrugged. "What? It's true. That's why we just watched her get pulverized by a zombie guy for the last six hours."
I sighed and stood. "I think I need a long sleep. Can you let yourselves out?"
"Did you want us to stay?" Ann offered.
I shook my head. "No, I'll be fine. Nothing internal, just tired."
They reluctantly stood. "All right, but I expect you to be at work tomorrow," Ann insisted.
"And if you need anything just bang through the wall," Tiffany added.
I managed a small smile for them. "I'll be fine, thanks."
They each gave me a hug, a look of pity, and a final farewell before they left. I sighed and shuffled my way to my bedroom with Mo by my side.
"You weren't being entirely truthful with your internal injuries," Mo told me.
"Why do you say that?" I asked him as I dug into my drawer and tossed out my night clothes.
Mo hopped onto the foot of the bed and twitched his tail at me. "Your heart still doesn't know what it wants to do."
I paused over my opened drawer and sighed. "I think I'm a little too tired for this talk."
Mo hopped off the bed and walked to the closed entrance door. "All right, but you have to decide sometime, and I suggest you do it soon."
I frowned and spun around to the fiendish feline. "And what's that-" Mo walked through the closed door and out of sight. I raced after him, flung open the door, and stuck my head into the hall. No sign of the hairball. "Mo? Mo?" No answer. I rolled my eyes and closed the door. I'd have to ask him about that tomorrow.
I slept through the night undisturbed and woke up feeling exhausted and aching. My body went through the motions, and somehow I made it to work with ten seconds to spare. Ann met me at my cubicle. There was a frown on her face. There was never a frown on her face unless someone died or there was big trouble. I wasn't sure which one I hoped for.
"What's wrong?" I asked her.
"Do you. . .do you know any priests?" she wondered.
I tilted my head and blinked at her. "No, why?"
"Well, it's just that-well, I met one last night after I left your apartment and he-well, he told me he was looking for someone in your apartment building and gave a description of somebody who looked like you," she explained.
I froze as a memory surfaced. The color drained from my face and my blood ran cold in my veins. The priests from the church. The warning from Madam Curie telling me to beware of people in black clothes. I grabbed Ann's hand and dragged her into my cubicle and onto the floor in front of my desk.
I lowered my voice to a strained, hushed whisper. "Where'd you meet this guy?"
"J-just down the block from your apartment. I couldn't find any parking nearby, so I-"
"What'd he look like?" I persisted.
She shrugged. "Kind of young, maybe our age, and he wore those black robes priests wear. That's how I knew he was a priest." I shuddered, and she clasped her hands in mine. "Liz, what's going on? What's wrong?"
I took a deep breath and shook my head. "Maybe nothing, maybe something. You said
he asked you about me? Did you tell him anything?" Ann cringed and turned her face away from me. Not a good sign. I grabbed her shoulders and gave her a shake. "Ann, please tell me you weren't your little honest self! Please!"
She bit her lower lip. "I did kind of tell him there was somebody in that building."
"And?"
"And that she lived at your apartment number."
"And?"
"And maybe I told him your name."
"Aargh!"
The whole floor grew deathly quiet. I cringed when I heard the stomp of footsteps approach my cubicle. I grabbed Ann and pulled her to her feet just as Lenin made his appearance in the doorway to the small space. His narrow eyes swept over us with intolerable cruelty.
"What is going on here?" he questioned me.
"I-um, I-" My eyes flickered to Ann. I grabbed her shoulders and pulled her partially in front of me. "Ann just told me she was pregnant."
"What?" she squeaked.
"Yeah, that's what I thought when you told me," I agreed.
Lenin's narrowed eyes grew thinner. I expected him to erupt in a tirade against lazy workers that finished in a grand finale of firing me. Instead his lips curled up in a smirk that made me shudder. "Another outburst like that and you're suspended," he warned me.
I vigorously nodded my head. "Yes, sir, it won't happen again." He marched off, and Ann spun around with a bewildered look on her face.
"I'm not pregnant, am I?" she asked me.
I sighed and patted her on the shoulder. "No, but I'm in trouble. That guy you told my life story to is probably not trying to get a hold of me to award me a million dollars."
"Maybe half that?" she suggested.
"Oh, to live in your world. . ." I mumbled.
"It is nice."
"Ann, I'm trying to tell you you did bad."
"Oh. . ."
"Yeah. What else did you tell the guy?"
She shook her head. "Nothing. He thanked me and walked away to a black car."
"A black sedan?" I questioned her.
She nodded. "Yeah, why? Who is this guy?"
I grabbed my purse, brushed past her to the hall, and paused for dramatic effect in the cubicle doorway. "He's trouble, Ann, a lot of trouble."
Ann held out a hand to me. "Where are you going? We're supposed to be working right now," she reminded me.
"Home. I have to ask a certain cat and incubus what I can do to shake these guys. If Lenin asks for me tell him I went into a fit of hysterics and had to leave."
I hurried down the hall and to the elevators. My mind swirled with thoughts of black robes and cars, and the warning from David about what they would do if they caught me. That pair wouldn't hesitate to dunk me in holy water and force me to do a rendition of the Wicked Witch scene from the end of the movie where I was just a puddle of food coloring. My only hope lay in a spirit feline who was miffed at me, and an incubus who wanted to drag me into his world.
Chapter 4
I drove back home and parked my car on the curb. My suspicious mind forced me to do a sweep of the stoop and alley. Nothing there. I stepped out of the car and froze when my new spider-er, succubus senses went crazy. There was a tingling at the back of my neck like something was wrong. My eyes swept over the area. Nothing but the usual light foot traffic on the road. It was the work hours, after all. There were a few cars parked along the curb. Some vans, a beat-up old truck, a really nice black sedan, a Volkswagon bug-oh shit. A nice black sedan. Just like the one I'd seen at the church.
The vehicle sat on the curb just a little ways past the entrance to the alley. The windows were darkly tinted, but I could just make out two people in the front, but not their faces. They were dressed in dark clothing. Black clothing.
My heart went rat-a-tat-tat on the drums of my nerves. I whipped my head away. Don't make eye contact. Don't let them know you know. I heard a soft rumble of an engine, and glanced over my shoulder. The vehicle crept towards me like a shadow monster threatening to swallow me. I took long steps and sailed up the stoop stairs. The damn door lock stood in my way. I fumbled for my keys. The car moved closer, never stopping, never slowing. I snatched my key from my purse and jammed it into the lock. The car parked behind mine. I grabbed the handle and turned the key. A car door opened. I flung myself inside and slammed the door shut with my back.
A shadow appeared at the door. There came a knock just to the side of my head. I stumbled back and turned to face the door. Someone stood on the other side. Someone in a frock. There came another knock. Oh hell no. I turned away and ran to the stairwell. No time for the elevator.
"No running in the lobby!" Ackerman yelled from his desk.
I ignored him and raced up the steps to my hall. My footsteps pounded the floor and Tiffany peeked her head out of her apartment. Her hair was rumpled and she was still in her pajamas. "Hey, Liz, where's the fire? Your boyfriend doesn't come tonight, remember?"
"Can't talk, mortal danger," I quipped as I rushed past her.
She blinked at me and her eyes brightened with wakefulness. "Wait, what?" she asked me as she slipped from her home and followed me to mine. "Did you say mortal danger?"
"Yeah. The church is trying to kill me," I replied.
Tiffany grabbed my arm and arrested my movement just in front of my door. She looked me over and frowned. "The church? What the hell's going on, Liz? You're as white as a sheet and you're trembling."
I glanced past her. Nobody else was in the hall. Still, I feared the knocking would echo through the apartment complex and somebody would answer it. I jerked my head toward my apartment. "Get inside and I'll explain."
The apartment didn't have a good view of the street, but the fire escape did. I hurried Tiffany to the window. On my way through I tossed my purse on the couch. Tiffany and I jumped a foot in the air when there came the loud screech of a cat.
"God damn it, Mo, why are you always laying there?" I hissed at him.
He sat up and whipped his tail at me. "Panicking about the car won't help you," he growled.
"What car?" Tiffany spoke up.
"I'll show you," I told her. Mo and Tiffany followed me over to the window and I noiselessly slid it up. I stuck my head out and made room for my friend. Mo joined us when he jumped onto the sill. At the head of the alley sat the familiar black car, and I could just make out a figure in the driver's seat. "That car," I whispered to her.
The hairs on the back of Mo's neck stood on end. "I know them. They interfere regularly with the supernatural balance of the city."
"They're the priests, aren't they?" I guessed.
"What priests?" Tiffany asked me.
Mo ignored her and nodded. "Yes, and the older one is especially fervent in his aim to rid the city of any influences he deems evil."
"And that means me," I added.
"Yes," Mo agreed.
"Liz, what's going on?" Tiffany pleaded to know.
I slipped back inside and shut tight the window when everyone else was out of the way. "The car down there belongs to some priests who want to get a hold of me."
"They wish to purify you of your succubus nature," Mo corrected me.
"That's kind of a permanent part of me now, so what does that mean for the rest of me?" I asked him.
Mo looked into my eyes without blinking. "It means the Death card."
Tiffany held up a hand in front of her. "Wait a minute, how do they know about you?"
I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. "I kind of went to their church for some holy water and burned myself. They-well, they noticed and followed me to my car. I guess they must have got my license plate. I can't think of any other way they would've found me. Then Ann-well, Ann met one of them last night and spilled the rest of the beans when he asked about me."
Tiffany rolled her eyes. "Good old honest Ann. So what do we do now? Call the cops?"
I snorted. "I don't think the cops are going to believe I'm being stalked by a couple of priests who want to kill-"
"Purify," Mo spoke up.
"-who want to see me melted into a pot of holy water," I rephrased.
"All right, no cops. So what are we going to do about them?" Tiffany asked me.
I pulled out the locket from my pocket and sighed. "I guess it's time to call in some supernatural help." I rubbed the lid of the locket like it was my magic lamp, and I was in desperate need of a wish.
"You rang?" David's voice called.
We three spun around and found him standing near the front door. I scowled at him. "No time for jokes. The priest guys somehow found out where I lived."
A dark shadow passed over David's face and he frowned. "Show me."
I led him to the window and we peeked our heads out. I nodded at the car. "They're in the car, or they were, but one of the guys went to the front door and knocked. I guess he wanted me to invite death in."
David's eyebrows crashed down and he pulled us both back into the apartment. "This is very serious. They will stop at nothing to destroy us."
"Seriously? You two have a pair of hit men priests on your tails?" Tiffany spoke up.
"Yes, and they have been following my trail for quite some time," David confessed.
"Wait, how does that work? You don't exactly go walking anywhere," I pointed out.
He sighed and hung his head. "I. . .I grew too bold and decided to test my powers against several in their fundamental congregation. Many of them confessed their sinful dreams, and the priests realized the truth, that I was behind them. They laid a trap for me in the bedroom of one of their more pious, and thus more challenging, worshipers, and-well, you both saw the result that night you found me."
"They pumped you full of lead?" Tiffany guessed.
David shook his head. "No, worse. Silver bullets dipped in holy water and blessed by the head priest, the elder of the two. That was why the wounds were so grievous, but fortunately their aim was not as devout as their beliefs, and I was able to escape without a bullet puncturing my heart." He turned to me and his eyes fell on my pocket. "And now you hold my heart for safe-keeping."
My eyes widened and I clapped my hand over my pocket. "Wait, this really is your heart? I mean, chest-thumping action and all?"
"Yes."
"But you said it wasn't!"
"I lied."
"Aargh!"
"I don't mean to be the bearer of obvious bad news, but this sounds pretty bad," Tiffany commented.
I took deep breaths, furrowed my brow and rubbed my chin. "Is it?" I wondered as I turned my narrowed eyes on David. "Why don't you stop them like you stopped those thugs in the park? Give them nightmares or wet dreams, or whatever will get them off our backs?" I suggested.