by Emery, Lynn
“She’s still into a kind of addiction, but now it’s work.” Alex made a fist with his right hand. “Seems like all I do is sit around waiting for her to call or show up.”
“And you said she’s into the party thing again.” Evan lifted a shoulder. “This problem seems to keep coming up with you two.”
“I know, I know.” Alex sat back.
“Look, I’m no relationship expert. But looks to me like you’re facing a dilemma.” Evan spoke with authority despite his disclaimer.
“What do you mean?”
He leaned closer and lowered his voice. “Like you said, on one level you got a solid groove thing goin’ on. But you need something deeper.”
“That’s what I thought we had. We had long talks,” Alex said.
“Yeah, but did you hear what she was really saying?” Evan broke off long enough to accept a full mug from the waitress. After the woman cleared the empty cups and left, he continued. “Maybe you heard what you wanted to hear.”
“No, I’m telling you we’ve had some real soul to soul discussions.” Alex toyed with a paper napkin. “Maybe I just need to enjoy what we have.”
“Uh-uh, won’t work. I know you, bro.” Evan spoke with conviction.
“Then tell me what’s happening.” Alex needed to hear an answer from someone. Obviously he was not going to get it on his own.
“Now I know you haven’t said anything, but…” Evan took a deep breath as though preparing to plunge into water. “You’re worried about her and the twins.”
“Not really. I—”
“Let me finish. Lanessa is an on the go kind of woman. You’re a stay at home man.” Evan’s black eyebrows went up high on his forehead. “That’s the one thing that hasn’t changed.”
Alex gazed back at him with his lips pressed together. He thought through what Evan had said. “It’s so stupid,” he finally burst out. “I mean, seems like we could work out something so small.”
“Must not be small or we wouldn’t be having this discussion.”
Alex held onto the mug but did not drink from it. “Lanessa is an exciting woman in so many ways.”
“She’s fine, no doubt about it,” Evan agreed heartily.
“Have I been fooling myself that it would work between us?” Alex looked at Evan.
“Hey, I can’t answer that one.” Evan held up both palms.
They sat quiet for a long time, each pondering his predicament. Alex could not imagine giving Lanessa up one more time. Still he had a duty to his family. His gut told him to take happiness and not be so cautious. Maybe it was time he stopped being such a rigid traditionalist. After all, the way Lanessa dived into life was what set his senses ablaze. Everything she did was with exuberance. Where he took time to consider alternatives, Lanessa jumped in and took him along for the ride. Alex had to admit it loved it. She set him free from his own inhibitions.
“Evan, I’m going to hold on,” Alex said simply. Yet his tone spoke volumes.
“I hope you guys make it last” Evan replied.
Alex gazed out the windows again. A knot of uncertainty still lay in the pit of his stomach. He longed to have some hope to make it disappear. “Me too, man.”
***
Lanessa was perched on a stool in Jade’s kitchen. She chewed on a corner of the low fat blueberry muffin. With a grimace, she swallowed. “You sound like our mother. And this thing taste like card board.”
“So I can’t do anything right, eh?” Jade tasted her muffin. “It’s great. You’re just overloaded on fatty, greasy donuts. As for sounding like mother, maybe so. But she’s right this time.”
“Now I’m truly scared,” Lanessa retorted.
“I’m serious.” Jade put an arm around her shoulders. “You’re back into running the streets. Not good.”
“Gee, little sister, don’t be so shy. Say what’s on your mind.” Lanessa moved away from her.
“It’s already put a strain on your relationship with Alex.” Jade brushed aside her sarcastic response.
“Let’s not go there.” Lanessa went to the coffee maker. She turned her back as she filled her cup again.
“I know the signs, Nessa.”
“Alex and I are doing great, if you must know. A couple of nights ago we were doing better than great.” She faced her again with a saucy smile. “Believe me.”
“I’m not talking sex. And the fact that you’re using that as evidence, tells me I’m right.”
“Look—“
“Let’s skip the part where you deny it until I finally get you to confess,” Jade cut her off.
Lanessa put down her cup. Jade could see through her faster than anyone. They’d become close during those dark days when she’d faced her demons. She tried to gather together the loose threads of doubt that had been on her mind for days.
“Okay, so you’re right about the parties,” Lanessa said. “Alex has mentioned it a couple of times.”
“And?” Jade pressed her to continue.
“And… It’s almost a replay of what we’ve gone through before, okay? You happy now?” Lanessa stared at the counter top.
Jade softened her tone. “Have you two really talked about this? I mean, seems to me the issue goes deeper than parties.”
“No,” Lanessa burst out. “It’s not something we can’t overcome. I’ll just be more selective about which parties I attend. Some were more social than business anyway.”
“And is that what you really want?”
Lanessa looked up at her. “What I really want is to have Alex in my life. And this time I’m not going to be selfish and stupid.”
“You were never either of those two things, Nessa.” Jade smiled at her with affection.
“Yeah, well you’re being kind. I thought everything would be different but better.”
“Can you go from dinner and the theatre in New Orleans every week to picnics and Disney World?”
“Sure I can,” Lanessa said gamely. She glanced at the still skeptical look on Jade’s face. “What? You don’t think I can?”
“Yes, but for how long?”
“I know.” Lanessa massaged her temples. “Okay I’ll be straight. I’m finally hitting my stride. For the first time in my life I feel like I’m a success.”
“Info, Inc. was a great idea,” Jade agreed. She went to the kitchen sink and rinsed the few dishes they’d used.
“It is! I put in long hours, but I love it.” Lanessa frowned. “Sometimes I think Alex doesn’t take it seriously.”
“Like maybe he wants you to be more, er, domestic?” Jade turned to face her.
“Exactly,” Lanessa said. “And we both know that’s just not me.” She bit off the words as they came out. The implication of what she’d said hit her full force.
Alex wanted a woman who could be there for him and his children. Not someone who was always on the go. Owning a business meant she would have to put in long days for the foreseeable future. Lanessa liked the fast pace. Alex said he loved her for who she was, but did he really?
“Tell him what you just told me.”
“I’m scared.” Lanessa’s voice broke. “I’m terrified that we’ll look at each and realize we’re too far apart.”
Jade dried her hands on a paper towel and sat down next to her. “I don’t think so, Nessa. You’re too much in love.”
“Will it be enough?” Lanessa was long past believing in the simple answers.
Jade smiled at her. “It’s what carries you through the roughest times.”
“I’m crazy for Alex. But I also know giving up too much of yourself is no good.” Lanessa thought of all those hours of therapy. She’d gained perspective on who she was and wanted to be. “Playing a part is what led me down a road to nowhere.”
“I really believe that Alex wants you, the woman you are.” Jade patted her arm.
“But I’ve got to find a way to adapt. I can’t expect Ales and the twins to run a distant second to my business,” Lanessa said in a firm voice
. She was speaking more to herself than to Jade.
“Spoken like a true mama and mate in training,” Jade teased.
“Who would have thought?” Lanessa laughed. “I’m used to spending Saturdays having my hair and nails done. Now it’s the Fun Fair Park.”
Jade studied her for a time. “But I can tell how much you like it.”
“Yes,” Lanessa said softly. “I really do.”
“Then I’d say you’re a long way toward solving the problem.” Jade nodded happily.
Lanessa wanted to feel reassured. Still she knew that the outcome was far from certain. “I’m giving it everything I’ve got, Jade. I just hope it’s enough.”
***
Lanessa sat in the posh waiting area outside the Paxton-Waite International executive suites. Dawson and a handful of the top employees would hear a verbal summary of her report. Far from reviewing her presentation, Lanessa was staring straight ahead thinking of Alex.
“Would you like coffee or a soft drink?”The secretary leaned forward across her desk. “Ma’am, I said would you like something to drink?”
Lanessa heard the last question clearly. She hesitated before answering. “No, thanks. I’m fine.”
Two lies told in less than ten seconds. She craved a drink, and not diet cola either, and she was not fine. She needed to focus on the task at hand. Yet last night was still on her mind. On the surface her date with Alex seemed fine. Yet there was a distance between them. Or was she imagining things? Lanessa tried to remember every nuance of expression, every gesture he’d made that might tell her otherwise. She was still sorting through images of Alex when the secretary’s voice broke through her thoughts.
“They’re ready for you now, Ms. Thomas.”
Lanessa picked up her briefcase and followed the young woman down the hall. They went into a large conference room. An oval table was in the center of it. Leather chairs a deep red color matched green and red drapes pulled back from wide windows. Lanessa put aside musings about her personal life. Her attention was now on the three men and two women seated around the room. They glanced at her in appraisal. Dawson and Hargrove were not here. She was speculating on their whereabouts when one of the women seemed to read her mind.
“Mr. Dawson will be here shortly. I’ll introduce us in the meantime. I’m Pauline Shuster, executive vice president of customer relations.”
She introduced her colleagues. They were all either vice-presidents or assistant vice presidents in charge of a major department of the company. Ms. Shuster directed her to an empty chair at one end of the table. Lanessa took out her copy of the report, a note pad and her planner.
“I’m glad to meet you all. I hope you’ve had a chance to review the information I provided Mr. Dawson and Hargrove.”
“Indeed,” one man said.
“Very interesting.” Ms. Shuster wore a professional smile.
“Good, everyone is here,” Dawson said. He stood in the door for a moment before walking. Ken Hargrove was right behind him.” Good morning, Ms. Thomas.”
“Good morning.” Lanessa watched him walked to the end of the conference table. The others sat straighter and seemed to be on alert.
Ken came to Lanessa and shook her hand. “Nice to see you again.” He sat down in the empty chair next to her.
“Same here,” Lanessa said. She fought the urge to wipe her hand on a napkin. Hargrove was too chummy for her taste. And what was that little squeeze to her palm about?
“Has everyone thoroughly reviewed the report on the Des Allemand area?” Dawson looked around at his staff. They all nodded.
Lanessa was amused. As if one of them would be dumb enough to say no. Dawson might be all grace and good manners. Yet it was clear he commanded respect, even fear.
“Ms. Thomas did an excellent job,” Ken intoned. He gazed at her.
“Why don’t I give a summary of the major sections?” Lanessa looked down at her notes. This guy is laying it on thick. I’m leaving before the smell gets in my clothes.
She assumed an expression that gave no hint of her thoughts. Lanessa gave a brief description of how the topics were organized. Then she went over the major findings. Her report was divided into a description of the history of the area, the geography, the local political leaders, demographics and last the culture. What she had not found on paper, she used her contacts to talk to people who grew up near Des Allemands. From them she got the names of relatives. That kind of introduction made her report particularly informative.
“So the final point I’d like to make is the residents are willing to listen. The personal touch is important. Formal hearings or meetings might work elsewhere. But down here, walking in the town and introducing yourself to the informal community leaders is what I recommend.” Lanessa sat back in her chair.
“Informal leaders?” Hargrove held his head to one side. “Could you explain that?”
“Sure. In every community there are formal. The mayor, aldermen or city councilors and so on. But there are also folks who don’t hold office but they wield great influence,” Lanessa said.
“So if we want to do have good relations with the residents, we must pay attention to them also.” Dawson wore a pleased look.
“That’s why there are names listed in the appendix that aren’t elected or appointed officials. Each one has a short biography you’ll notice.”
Ken beamed at her and leaned in her direction to face the others. “As I said, an excellent report. Are there any questions?”
Ms. Shuster wore a stiff look as she watched Hargrove move closer to Lanessa. While the others asked questions to clarify portions of the report, she sat with her thin lips pressed together. Lanessa’s radar picked up signals that screamed jealous female. The old Lanessa would have rubbed salt in the wound. That Ken held no attraction for her would not have mattered. Fortunately for Ms. Tight Mouth the old Lanessa was gone. Lanessa also knew that Dawson was aware of the minor drama. From time to time he threw an irritated glance at Ken.
“I think we have a complete picture,” Dawson said in a crisp tone. This clear signal cut off further questions.” We’ll have another meeting soon. We need to review the building permits and other procedures involved.
The others filed out of the room after making appropriate goodbyes. Lanessa thought they seemed glad to escape unscathed by the formidable man.
“Thank you, Ms. Thomas.” Dawson looked at her. “We’ve taken up more you time than we originally requested.”
“No problem.” Lanessa smiled at him. The extra hours added up to a handsome bonus.” That’s what I’m here for. But I am puzzled by something.” She closed the leather covered note pad that matched her brief case. In an instant she decided on this move.
“Yes?” Dawson looked interested.
Ken put a hand on the back of her chair. “Now you get to grill us.”
“Just a question. Why that area?” Lanessa returned his gaze. “It’s not far from Highway One I know, but why not Norco or Reserve?”
“Too much industry. We need room to expand,” Dawson said.
“Besides, we want to recruit top plant managers from competitors. Getting out of crowded cities into that lovely parish would make it attractive.” Hargrove smiled at her.
“Transportation isn’t a problem. As you said, the highway makes truck deliveries easy.”
“Just seems out of the way.”
“The plant will be close enough to water routes leading directly to the gulf,” Ken said. He smiled at her. “We can ship with less fuss, move the product faster.”
“We just liked the site better than the alternatives,” Dawson broke in.
“For making gases and metals used in manufacturing, is that right?” Lanessa noticed the shift in his mood.
“Yes. Well, I’m expecting a call from Germany. You’ll have to excuse us.” Dawson stood.
Now she was being dismissed. Lanessa smiled at him as she crossed the room and shook his hand. “Certainly. And before I leave, tha
nk you. I have three new clients because of your recommendation.”
“I was glad to do it. They need the best and you can deliver it. Goodbye.” Dawson headed for the door that led to his office.
“I’ll show Ms. Thomas out.” Ken walked to the double doors leading to the hallway and the waiting area.
“Fine. I’ll need the cost projections for this phone call from Munich.” Dawson gave him a pointed look.
“Don’t worry about it.” Ken wore a relaxed expression. “I’ve got it covered.”
Lanessa pretended not to notice the coded messages. Ken had come close to saying too much a while ago. Now Dawson was warning him away from her. Ken was confident that his masculine appeal was affecting her. Lanessa decided to play on his conceit.
“I can find my way out, Mr. Hargrove.” She smiled at him warmly. “I don’t want to take up any more of your time.”
“The papers are on my desk and this is the way to my office.” Hargrove opened the door for her. “So why not mix business with pleasure,” he murmured. “And call me Ken.”
Lanessa suppressed a shiver of distaste. “Alright.” She maintained her smile despite wanting to slap the smug look from his face.
“In one sense I was sorry to get your report.” Ken walked beside her with unhurried steps.
“Nothing in it was bad news for your project.” Lanessa played the innocent. She had practically written the rules to this game of flirtation.
“I know. But we won’t be meeting again.” Ken was slowing his stride even more to prolong their progress.
“You never know. Paxton-Waite has a lot of new operations. You may very well call on my services again.” Lanessa kept her voice neutral. Too much inflection and he’d think it was an invitation.
Ken gazed at her. “Yes, maybe so.” He picked up the pace of his footsteps. His half-smile exuded confidence.
Lanessa smiled, too. She’d played just the right card to massage his male ego. He probably took her comment as a sign she could be discreet. Maybe she could massage out a few answers before she left. Lanessa walked ahead of him to the lobby. She turned to face him. Luckily the secretary was not there.