In my opinion, the chief elder had blended a mishmash of religious practice that suited his purposes, and perverted it. You had to admire the brilliance of this. Set yourself up as high priest to a frightening goddess as an excuse to wield absolute power. Then exploit the fears of true believers like Sandhya to provide willing playmates that could be used as bribes for political means.
“Sandhya, don’t you see that Kalidasa made up this cult for his own ends?”
“An adept is the conduit through which divinity flows.”
I laughed harder. “I’ve been called a lot of things in my day, but never a conduit of divinity.”
Her lips pursed. “I would not expect your narrow Western mind to understand. This is your karma. Indeed, it is a great honor. I do not know what you did in your past life to deserve this, but do try to live up to it.”
I’d made a mess of things again. I didn’t want to make fun of her beliefs even if I thought them ridiculous. Maybe it was the only way she could do what she did without losing her sanity. Besides, I had to eventually walk the walk and talk the talk. “Honestly Sandhya, I don’t mean disrespect to you. You’ve taught me so much. Not just about singing and dancing and all. I can be a selfish, vain brat, but you make me want to be better than that.”
Color crept up from her bosom to her face. “I do not need compliments from a silly boy.”
I bet she got loads of compliments from those she entertained, but how many of them really respected her as I did, or gave her credit for having a brain at all? Having been in a similar position for a while, I believed I understood how tough it was to be a woman in a man’s world.
“You’re a hundred times smarter than that fat slug, Kalidasa.”
“Hush, I won’t hear you irreverence our highest guru.”
Sandhya broke eye contact with me and rolled up the scrolls. Her careful hands replaced them into their containers on the shelves. “Enough for tonight. You must practice your music now. Go fetch the sitar.”
I ambled to the door, shaking my head. Someone as smart as Sandhya should have been able to see through the nonsense she’d been fed. Kalidasa didn’t give a fuck for the faith she held dear. You’d think that someone who called himself the priest of the Mother would reverence women more, but from what Sandhya had told me, the palace women were treated abysmally. Boys like me didn’t fare any better, being considered a lesser, third sex, little more than eunuchs.
Screeches and bloodcurdling whistles, like cries of raptors on the wing, arose from the jungle surrounding the compound. The din closed in around us from all sides. I froze in my tracks and turned to Sandhya. Her golden skin paled to ivory, and her eyes widened in fear.
Gunfire erupted outside of the ashram walls. The guards shouted to one another. I heard the sound of many heavy feet running in all directions. “What is it?”
“A rat attack.” She grabbed me by the hand and pulled me toward the library door. We broke into a run. Their high-pitched screams grew louder and louder, worse than anything produced by the monkeys that lived in the canopy. We came to a halt at the spring. Sandhya scented the air and tilted her head to listen.
I did the same. “This has happened before?”
“Yes.”
“Why do they make those sounds?”
“They say it is to strike fear in our hearts. My brothers and sisters are attending the Exalted Father. We must guard the Mother alone.”
Kali’s statue looked more than capable of defending herself with all those weapon-wielding arms. Just what would two unarmed sex slaves do to fight off her enemies?
“Sandhya, they’ve got guns.”
She just extended her arms and chanted. This is where religion entered the realm of the ludicrous for me. Outside, revolutionaries were attacking, and she just stood there and prayed. I looked around for something useful, just in case. The small knife Sandhya had given me to draw blood offerings to Kali hung from my waist. Not much, but it was better than nothing.
The rats’ screams reached earsplitting levels. Rounds of ammunition whined overhead and hammered the walls. Would the compound be breached? The twenty-foot fences outside of the building were electrified, but they didn’t inspire my confidence. I knew from my experiments that vampires could jump higher than the enclosure or swing down over from the trees. From the sound of it, the rats outnumbered Kalidasa’s dogs. My small knife wouldn’t protect us.
I scanned the area for scents. My eyes searched around the bushes and trees planted near the base of the courtyard walls. Nothing appeared out of the ordinary, but I remained on my guard. Sandhya just continued praying.
The fighting went on for some time. My heart pounded, every nerve and cell filled with the urge to join in the combat. Then, just as fast as it had arisen, the gunfire died down. The shrieks of the rats faded away into the distance.
Sandhya lowered her arms and ceased chanting. “Thank the Mother! They have retreated.”
“How often does this happen?”
“Twice in the last four months. They live somewhere in the jungle, in hidden caves perhaps. The dogs have searched for their den to no avail. These outcasts would never have dared such a thing in years past. This ground is sacred. Here, Kali Maa imparted her divine kiss on the Exalted Father, giving birth to our race. The rabble no longer fears her wrath or pays her the reverence due. They follow a new god.”
The rats in London had invoked the name of the leader they called Loki. I wondered if he, like myself, had pegged Kalidasa as the world’s greatest con man. My finger caressed the cool steel of the knife. For a moment, I entertained the thought of killing the fat fuck myself. But what would that get me except beheaded?
Sandhya nodded to me. “Go and fetch your sitar.”
I padded off to my room to get the instrument. After the excitement of the attack the ashram felt too small and quiet. My heart still raced. Blood scented the air, and my senses sharpened to a keen edge. The sweetish smell of decay mucked with my head, drawing me to seek out the source. In that heat, decomposition accelerated. I wanted to climb the walls to see how many had died, to lap up the spilt blood. Screw the music lessons when carnage called. What was this bloodthirsty animal growling to burst out of me all of a sudden? I beat it back and turned the door handle to my room. Then Sandhya screamed.
I clenched my knife and whirled toward the sound. Two figures dressed in black struggled with my guru. I dashed toward them, surprised at my own speed. One forced her to the ground and pinned her arms over her head. He wore a knife strapped to his hip. The other sprawled over her, also sporting a knife, but with a rifle slung over his back. Neither was very tall, not much bigger than Sandhya, skinny but wiry. Dirt smeared their ragged clothes. They chattered to one another like excited monkeys. Sandhya fought hard, cursing. The one atop her tore at her clothing. Her breasts spilled out. A burst of rage struck my heart. How dare they defile my goddess?
A yell ripped from deep in my chest. I crouched and sprang, using one of the dance moves Avijit had taught me. My body hurtled through the air. The one holding Sandhya’s arms let go and scrambled to his feet. The other jumped up and went for his gun. Sandhya rolled away, clutching her torn clothes.
I ripped the gun from the rat’s arms and slammed it across his face, as the other one clambered onto my back. The one I’d hit pitched to his knees and screamed. Blood spurted from his nose. I raised the gun and aimed, not really sure if I was doing it right. The rat on my back wrapped his hands around my throat. His skinny legs squeezed my chest.
I squeezed the trigger. The rat on the ground jumped aside. The bullet ricocheted off Kali’s statue, sending up a spray of black grit. I was sure I’d just committed some horrible sin. Damn, I couldn’t get a decent shot off with this gnome on my back choking me. The rat sank his fangs into my neck. The little bastard would drain me. The other jumped up and grabbed onto the rifle in my hands. I needed free hands to rid myself of the one sucking my blood, but I couldn’t let the other one get hold of the gun.<
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I smashed the rifle down against the paving stones. It splintered into pieces. My hands reached up to free myself of this sucking leech. Long, dirty fingernails dug into my arms. His bare toes scraped my belly. He cursed and spit. I managed to pry him away and hurl him aside. The small figure sailed across the courtyard. The rat’s arms and legs swam against the air as if trying to slow his body down. His head hit the corner of a bench with a crack.
The other one snarled and launched at me. I pivoted on one foot and kicked out as hard as I could with the opposite, hitting the rat in the gut. His body flew backward into the courtyard wall. Bits of mortar and stone broke off. The other rat rose to his feet. Both of them shrieked and rushed me now. I bent my knees and took to the air, lashing out with both feet at once, striking their heads. The two rats fell back, snarling and snapping like Rottweilers. I pulled my knife. The two rats drew theirs.
I gathered my concentration and sped toward them with the knife leading. They squared off to meet me. A piercing sound issued from their fanged mouths. A shrill voice I didn’t recognize as my own rose to top theirs. A force inside propelled me. I spun, turning faster and faster, the curved blade in my hand acting like a buzz saw.
The rats scurried toward the trees, but not fast enough. My blade sliced one’s throat. Blood gushed over me and into my open mouth. A rush traveled from my head to my toes. The remaining one vaulted to the top of the wall to grab a low-hanging branch, dropping his knife. I leapt up and caught his leg, dragging him down into a flowerbed.
He twisted his body around and lunged at me with fangs bared, snagging my arm and biting down. I tore my arm free and threw him to the ground. Falling to my knees, I pinned him, with one leg pushing on his chest. He lunged and hissed like a cobra. Squirming to free himself, he squeezed out a word in English. “Whore!”
He shouldn’t have used that word. A growl tore out of my throat. I raised my arm and drove my knife into his eye. Milky fluid burst forth. Blood poured out after it in a dark red flood. The rat clutched his face. It didn’t kill him, but he didn’t fight back anymore. I rose to my feet. The excitement drained from me, leaving me wobbly legged. The rat rolled back and forth on the ground, with a high-pitched howl of pain.
I hesitated for some reason. The rat’s small body lay hunched up. Skinny, brown legs poked out of too-short pants. Black crusted the soles of his feet, making them more like the pads of an animal. Pathetic. He looked younger than me, not more than fourteen, but that meant nothing in a vampire. He could have been five hundred years old for all I knew. Why did I feel remorse? He’d tried to hurt Sandhya. I needed to finish the little bastard.
Sandhya moved in behind me. “He won’t survive such a wound. Don’t prolong his suffering.”
I crouched and pinned the rat onto his back again. His intact eye clenched shut, the ragged hole beside it leaking blood and brain matter. His teeth gritted, as if bracing for the deathblow. Above me, Sandhya murmured a prayer. I took a deep breath and rammed the knife into the boy’s carotid artery. More blood sprayed out. My vessels screamed for it. I couldn’t stop myself. Burying my face in the wound, I gulped the hot fluid down until the rat’s heart stopped pumping. I fell onto my back, gasping. The sensation blew my mind. Every cell in every part of me vibrated and sizzled like someone had run a thousand volts through it. I lay there, bathed in blood and panting like an animal.
My heartbeat slowed to its usual pace. Now a sense of embarrassment came over me. I hated losing control like this in front of Sandhya. What kind of monster acted in such a way?
She ignored my reaction and re-arranged her clothing. Her hand reached for mine. I took it and rose. She made a reverence to me. “Thank you, Cedric. They would have killed me when they were done.”
I looked around, worried that more of them lurked in the shrubbery surrounding the courtyard. “Why didn’t they retreat with the others?”
“No doubt they thought they could just slip in here and get away. To rape and murder an adept would be something to brag of to their fellows. You must bathe. The spring waters hasten healing. I’ll see to your wounds.”
“I’m fine.”
She raised my arm to show where skin had ripped free of the muscle when the rat had bitten into me. Flesh hung in bloody shreds. In the excitement, I hadn’t even felt it.
Sandhya led me to the spring. I stripped down with her help and slipped into the water, ducking under the surface to wash away the blood from my face and body.
“I must fetch my chest. I will return in a moment.”
A howl of pain escaped my lips the moment she left. I crumpled against the pool’s edge. It hurt like hell. The brave hero nearly fainted when he looked at the mess of his forearm. Sandhya returned and knelt beside the pool. I drew myself up, in an attempt at masculine fortitude. Her hands smoothed the shredded skin back over my arm. The blood had clotted, but the flesh didn’t magically reform in an instant like I’d seen in the movies. I winced as she cupped her hand and poured the hot water over the wound. “Fuck, it stings.”
Sandhya took a jar from her adept’s chest and poured something over the wound. The pain lessened. Tearing a strip of cloth from my robe for a bandage, she bound up the lacerations. “It will be better in a few nights. You will never know it happened.” Sandhya smiled at me for the first time. It struck me deeper than the rat’s teeth had. Our eyes met for an instant. She turned away first. “I’ll fetch you some clean clothing.”
Holding my bandaged arm outside of the pool, I sank into the water to my chin. Hair floated out all around me like red seaweed. Plunging my head under, I wished I could wash away the inconvenient emotions inside of it. Two kills and Sandhya’s approval—too much in one night for this boy to process.
Sandhya alerted the harem guards that we’d been attacked and there were bodies to be disposed of. The three dogs eyed me as I pulled on the new set of clothing Sandhya had brought. They made comments I didn’t understand. Their snickers said it all.
Sandhya rebuked them in Bengali. They shut up. One of them stood before us while the other two gathered up the corpses. He asked a question of Sandhya in the same language. My guru nodded and answered in English, for my benefit I supposed. “Shardul lived up to his name tonight. He killed them both, single-handedly.”
The guard shifted his feet, as if the idea didn’t sit well with him. He grunted and turned away to assist in the disposal.
Sandhya called after him. “Send in a slave to clean up the blood.”
The guards left with the bodies. Sandhya stood with hands splayed over her hips and surveyed the mess the killings had made. “After the blood is washed away, I must perform a purification ceremony. You will observe the rites and assist me.”
Great, more religious mumbo-jumbo to learn. I sighed, belting my choga around my waist and slipping my knife under the sash. Sandhya set off across the courtyard at a brisk pace, bells on her ankles tinkling. “Cedric, don’t dawdle! We must fetch the appropriate offerings.” Things had reverted to normal. My bare feet followed her to the ashram stores. Shardul the hero morphed back into Cedric the whipping boy in a span of minutes.
But the tiger had tasted blood. He purred under my skin, biding his time.
FIVE
Five adepts and I stood in a ring around Kali’s statue. Sunset streaked the sky with orange and purple. Nocturnal creatures shrieked from the jungle like the damned. With careful hands, I passed bowls of milk and blood to Avijit, who took them with a smirk. He placed them at Kali’s feet and chanted. The adepts joined in. Another boy, whose cobalt-blue eyes pointed to European origins, gave me a smile when I returned to my spot in the circle. He’d been saddled with an unpronounceable name that meant something to the effect of “Bluebird” and had the distinction of being last adept to pass the training.
I managed to get through the ritual without tripping and spilling anything, the very picture of reverence, but the others’ enraptured faces reminded me of The Stepford Wives. A shiver passed down between m
y shoulder blades. Would I end up a blissed-out zombie like the rest of them? Everything about the ashram was designed to suck someone in. The mantras and meditation relaxed my body and allowed me to think more clearly. Hallucinogens expanded my mind. The teaching promised enlightenment through sex. This is how cults indoctrinated people. Somehow, I had to find a way to keep a grip on reality yet convince everyone of my devotion.
Afterward, Sandhya took me aside. “You comported yourself very well. Tonight you begin training in the arts of love.”
I dreaded smug Avijit joining us in the training bedchamber, but to my surprise, she beckoned to the other boy. The adept’s toothy smile radiated Mediterranean charm. He extended his hand. “Forget the official name. Call me Marco.”
I clasped his hand. Marco topped Avijit’s Lilliputian stature by several inches. His eyes crinkled with mischief, and his choga hung off his shoulders with a rakish air. Linking an arm through mine, he led me along the corridor. “I watched you dancing and liked what I saw. So I asked Sandhya if I could assist her. I’ve got to train someone to advance to my next rank. It’s about time we have some new blood around here. The others Raj brought didn’t even make it past the ordeal.”
We entered the same bedroom where Sandhya had taught me all the domestic niceties. Marco turned up the overhead fans and folded down the covers. He opened the chest he’d brought along and selected an essence to sprinkle on the sheets. It smelled of citrus and cloves. “I blend this myself. I can’t stand those heavy perfumes the others use. Civet and ambergris, ugh. Trust me, there’s enough aphrodisiac in our own scent.”
I hovered behind him, not knowing what to say, so I kept my mouth shut. I’d learned to keep my jokes and opinions to myself. Sandhya and Avijit found nothing I said funny.
Marco turned back to replace the bottle into the chest and patted me on the shoulder. “Don’t be nervous, bambino. I’ll go easy on you.” Then he chuckled. “Unless you prefer it otherwise, eh?”
My Fearful Symmetry Page 8