“Sure!” she said back. While the nurse unlocked the brakes on Lily’s bed, she gave her girlfriend another hug. “See you in a bit, Lily.”
Lily’s arms went around her as well. “Yep, I still like that.”
The two girls giggled while Monica stood up. She watched the nurse get the bed ready to move.
“Pati, did you use to work at a hospital in Chicago?” Monica asked.
Pati looked at her with a smile. “Yes, I did. I was at Cook County.”
“ICU?”
“How’d you know that?” Pati asked.
“Do you remember my mom, Evelyn Readdie? She was in the I-55 pileup about four years ago.”
“Oh yeah!” Pati exclaimed, her voice resonating the joy she showed. “How is she doing? Did she get everything worked out with Debra?”
Monica had to giggle at the question. She couldn’t believe Pati remembered her mom, let alone Debra. But she still filled her in on Evelyn’s recovery and watched Pati glow even more.
“That’s awesome,” Pati said. “I’m so glad to hear that. I’ve been thinking about her over the years. Tell her I said hi.”
“I’ll do that,” Monica said. She turned to Lillian and smiled. “And I’ll see you in a few minutes, Lily.”
Monica watched Pati roll the bed out and sighed softly. Her gaze went over to Judy and saw the big smile she had on her face.
“What?” Monica asked, sounding a little worried.
“You must be special,” Judy replied. “Lil is ridiculously choosey on who gets to shorten her name.”
Warmth flushed her cheeks. She gave a half-smile and watched Judy grab her purse from the shelf.
“Ready?” Judy asked.
She nodded, excited about the chance to get to know the woman who raised Lily. “Lead the way!”
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Monica worked on homework while lying on her bed. She was on her stomach, propped up by her elbows. Her legs were bent at the knees and her ankles crossed. Her legs swayed back and forth with the music coming through her earbuds.
She was nearly done with her trigonometry homework when her phone rang. The ringtone brought a smile to her face as she answered the call.
“Hey, Lily,” she greeted. “How are you feeling?”
“I’m still tired,” Lily said. “But at least I’m home.”
Monica’s body deflated a little bit, her feet coming to rest on the wall. “I’m sorry, I should’ve been there.”
“Don’t be. You had school. I understand.”
“Want me to come over after dinner?”
“I don’t think so. I’ve been asleep most of the day, and I could fall asleep while we were on the phone. I’d rather spend time with you awake than have you here when I’m asleep.”
“How about tomorrow after school?”
“I’d love that, Monica. I miss you.”
“I miss you too, Lily,” she said, spotting Debra looking at her with a smile.
“I’d better go before you end up talking to dead air,” Lily said. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“See you tomorrow.”
Monica hung up and sighed while she put her phone down. Although her homework beckoned to her again, she couldn’t concentrate. She didn’t understand what the problem was. If she’d gotten off the phone with Chloe or Erica, she wouldn’t have a problem getting back to her assignments. Something was different this time. She was sad and didn’t know why.
“Are you okay?” Debra asked.
“I don’t know,” Monica said. “I’m sad that we stopped talking, but that’s never happened before.”
Debra sat beside her. “I think you like her. As in more than being friends and going out.”
She sighed and rolled onto her back. “I do like her, but do you honestly think it could be a crush?”
“Do you think you have a crush on Lillian?”
Monica sat up and shrugged. “I don’t know. I’ve got so many new feelings and emotions in my head when she’s around that I can’t fully process them all. Is that what a crush is?”
Debra smiled at her. “It’s a little more than that. Do you feel attracted to her?”
Monica paused to consider the possibility. She felt just as lost as she was with everything else that involved Lily. “I’m not sure. Maybe it is possible.”
Debra smirked and slipped an arm over her shoulder. “I think I see something else in your eyes too. Maybe something stronger than a crush.”
Monica’s eyes nearly bulged out of her head. Did Debra mean love? Was that why everything was a jumble? Could she be falling in love with Lily? Wouldn’t that make Lily the person she’d been looking for? Maybe her mom was right after all. Monica wasn’t looking to start anything with Lily. It just happened. But the thought confused her as well.
She’d told her exes that she loved them, but the reality was that she didn’t feel a thing. Nada. Zip. Diddly-squat. There was no desire to be romantic with any of them. She enjoyed having the relationships, but for her things like flowers, candlelit dinners, and holding hands at the movie theater were meaningless. She never felt anything back for them.
But what made Lily stand out? Why did she ask Lily out? She couldn’t get her former rival out of her mind. Monica thought the worst happened when she saw Lily collapse at choir last week. She wanted to get to know her better since they reconnected. Maybe she does feel an attraction to Lily. A crush. That would make sense. If she could only sort everything out and know for sure.
“I don’t know what to do or think,” she admitted.
Debra put an arm around her daughter. “If you ever want or need help, let us know. Okay?”
Monica nodded and pulled Debra in for a hug.
“Is this a bad time?” Kendra asked.
A sense of relief flowed through Monica. She was ready to change gears and push aside her dreams of a cat orphanage. “No, it isn’t. What’s going on?”
“I was wondering if everyone could help me with an assignment for school after dinner.”
Debra cocked an eyebrow. “All three of us? What kind of assignment is this?”
“We’re supposed to write an essay on someone who inspires me,” Kendra explained. “I couldn’t choose just one of you since my entire family inspires me.”
Both Debra and Monica smiled at her, honored by Kendra’s request.
“We’d be happy to help, sweetie,” Debra said.
“Thanks!” Kendra said, hugging each of them in turn. “This is going to be so awesome!”
“Is there anything we should know about ahead of time, so we’re prepared for the question?” Monica asked as her sister was halfway out the door.
Kendra stopped and looked at her. “Maybe.” Before anyone could say anything else, Kendra slipped down the hallway.
“Why do I suspect a little mischief coming with some of her questions?” Debra asked.
Monica just looked out the doorway, still wondering what Kendra meant. “Because that’s her style.”
“Oh boy.”
CHAPTER TWELVE
Following the clinking and clanking of dishes, silverware, and cups, Monica and her family finished dishes and had leftover meatballs put away. They sat in the dining room for Kendra’s assignment. The aroma of meatballs, gravy, corn, and rolls still tickled their noses.
“Okay,” Evelyn said as her stomach announced its approval of tonight’s meal. “Excuse me! Are we ready to start?”
“Let’s go,” Monica said with a smile.
Kendra put her Chromebook in front of her and slid her phone to the middle of the table. “Okay, so I don’t know where to start, except at the beginning.” She turned her attention to Evelyn and Debra. “How did you two meet?”
Smiles broke out on Evelyn’s and Debra’s faces. The sheer brightness from them was contagious, drawing equally bright smiles from Kendra and Monica. The memory was a happy one.
“We met at a singles night at a club in Clive,” Debra said. “I found Evie by hers
elf, looking nervous as all get out.”
Kendra looked surprised at the news. She looked at Evelyn after typing in a note on her Chromebook. “Nervous? Why were you nervous?”
Evelyn gave Debra a stare. “It was the first time I’d ever tried going out as me. I had no idea what to do and wondered if I belonged there.”
Debra slid her hand over Evelyn’s. “It was adorable. Even after I talked her into joining me, she was so rigid that I had to keep making jokes to get her to smile.”
“It ended up being a fantastic night,” Evelyn continued. “We made plans to see each other the next night, and a year later we got engaged. The rest is history.”
Monica smiled when her parents exchanged loving glances, and Debra kissed Evelyn’s forehead.
“That’s awesome!” Kendra said. “What was the lowest point in your marriage?”
In an instant, the mood in the room changed. Monica cringed inside. She remembered that month very well.
“There’s no question about it,” Evelyn said. “Our lowest point was the month or so we were separated. It was right before you came to live with us.”
Kendra leaned forward, resting her elbows on the table. “What happened?”
“We both made some mistakes,” Debra said. “Our emotions were insanely high, and they almost tore us apart.”
“If we didn’t have such a tight bond,” Evelyn added, “our family may not have survived. It was terrible.”
Kendra typed out another note. “How did you two recover from it?”
Debra slid her hand over Evelyn’s. “We both learned how fragile life can be. It put things in a new perspective for us. We’ve used that ever since when hard times pop up.”
Monica saw Kendra’s smile and couldn’t help but do the same. How close the family came to absolute disaster amazed her to this day. She shuddered when she thought about how much they could’ve lost that last week in Schaumburg, and it didn’t go unnoticed. Evelyn reached across the table to hold her hand and smile at her.
“So, Mama,” Kendra said. “When did you realize you’re transgender?”
Evelyn looked thoughtful as she leaned back against her seat. “I didn’t fully understand it until about 2002. But looking back, I can easily see the clues were there all along.”
“What made you decide to come out?” Kendra asked, focusing her attention on Evelyn instead of her assignment.
“I hit a low in 2002,” Evelyn said. “There was something wrong with me, but I couldn’t figure out what it was. For months, there was a battle inside my mind. Who am I? Why does it feel like there’s another person in my head? Which one is the real me, and which is the construct?
“It was affecting my marriage at the time, and I eventually hit a spot where I couldn’t take anymore. I was hurting inside. I was hurting my family. There was only one thing I could do to fix everything at once. So on a trip to Kansas City, I gave serious thought to throwing myself off a bridge. I was standing there, ready to do it. Then a voice says, ‘you don’t want to do this, because you don’t want to die just as much as I don’t.’
“I had this entire conversation with myself, both of these sides arguing, then they talked, then the realization set in. I’m not Ethan. I’m a woman with male parts, and this person I tried to hide had just rescued me from jumping. That night, I started tapping into her. Each new step felt normal to me. I went to a therapist and learned that I am transgender. A couple of months later, I came out to my wife and kids. My wife and son left, but Monica stayed.”
Kendra went wide-eyed as she looked at Monica. “You have a brother?”
“Yeah,” she admitted. “But I haven’t talked to him since that night. Heck, I haven’t even talked to my birth mom since then, either. My dad needed someone and they turned their backs. I hated them for it, and still do. We may share DNA, but I don’t have a brother. He abandoned me too.”
“Do you regret staying?” Kendra asked.
Monica looked at Evelyn and smiled brightly. “Not for a second. It brought us so much closer. Me staying put a sequence of events in motion that put Debra right in front of her and me a new sister—now two sisters—who I love and adore so much.”
“Have you thought about what you’d do if either of them came back?” Kendra asked as she jotted down some information.
“I’d be lying if I said no,” Monica said, looking at Evelyn and wondering what she’d think of the answer. “Now and then, I think about opening the front door, and they’d be standing right there. Sometimes, I do talk to them. For the most part, though, I end up telling them to get off our property before I call the police.”
Kendra’s brows furrowed. “I never had you pegged as someone who held a grudge.”
A pair of shoulders gave a nonchalant shrug back. “Both my brother and birth mom are pretty much dead to me anyway. They don’t deserve my time, so I don’t think about it.”
Monica dropped her eyes when she read the disbelief in Evelyn’s expression. From the corner of her eye, she saw the same thing from Debra. Today was the first time in years that she talked about her mother and brother.
“What are their names?” Kendra asked.
A rush of anger slammed into Monica’s stomach. She wanted Kendra to change the subject. Fast.
“It doesn’t matter,” she said. “I have better things to do than worry about those two lowlifes.”
“My ex-wife’s name is Molly,” Evelyn said. “My son is Ryan. He’s Monica’s fraternal twin.”
Monica glared at her with disbelief. Did her mom still think about those two?
“Have they tried getting in touch?” Kendra asked.
“No,” Evelyn said. “On the one hand that’s fine by me. But then again, I suppose it does hurt a little bit.”
Kendra continued talking to Evelyn about her transition. She asked about milestones, happy moments, and times that outright scared her. Evelyn talked about using the restroom at first, having someone stalk her on a business trip, and her family’s disapproval. When Kendra ran out of questions, she turned to Monica.
“Okay, Monica, I’m not going to let you out of it this time. Why in the world does Tricia call you ‘Prison Girl’ now and then?”
Monica’s eyes rolled into the back of her head while her moms giggled. Great. Now she’s going to have come clean or else one of her parents would do it for her. Her best friends don’t even know the story behind that nickname. She wanted to keep it that way, but now she figured a teacher was going to find out one way or another.
“I was born in a prison,” she said. “The Iowa Correctional Institution for Women to be exact.”
Kendra nearly choked on the drink of water she tried taking. “How did that happen?”
Monica sighed and shook her head. “As it turns out, Mom had an adventurous side. She went with some friends to a sorority party in Ames. One of the girls there took a liking to her, and Mom convinced her that she was 19 instead of 16.”
“No way!” Kendra exclaimed, laughing as she looked at Evelyn.
“Yep,” Evelyn said. “That did happen. A kiss went too far, and about a month later, she told me she was pregnant. Maybe two weeks after that, Molly was arrested for Statutory Rape even though it was consensual.”
“My brother and I were born about seven months later,” Monica added. “In the prison’s infirmary. I guess that’s how I got my knack for making a grand entrance.”
Everyone else in the dining room laughed because Monica did like to make her presence known now and then.
“I can’t believe that,” Kendra wailed, her body still shaking from laughter.
Even though Monica felt uneasy about her story spreading past her family, she couldn’t stop herself from joining her family’s laughter. After all, it was a good story to break the ice.
Monica was back on her bed, doing homework as she was before. She finished her trig assignment and moved on to Chemistry. Up to her ears in formulas and atomic weights, she was ready to shove her textboo
k into the school’s boiler.
“Hey sweetie,” Evelyn called out softly. “Have a minute?”
Thankful for the break, Monica moved so she sat on the side of her bed. Evelyn sat next to her, and the awkward silence told her she may not be interested in the upcoming conversation.
“Do you honestly feel that way about them?” Evelyn asked. “Or just making it more dramatic for Kendra?”
Monica sighed. She didn’t think highly of Molly and Ryan. The indignation she felt about getting abandoned was just as strong today as it was the day they left. It was hard for her to admit it out loud.
“I don’t regret what I said about them,” Monica croaked, trying not to cry. “Why did they abandon us?”
“You know Molly,” Evelyn said, putting both arms around her. “She was always set in her ways. She saw my transition as an abomination, and she wanted nothing more to do with me. And Ryan was a mama’s boy for sure. I’m not surprised he went with her.”
Monica slowly lifted her eyes to her mom. “Were you surprised that I stayed?”
Using only a warm smile, Evelyn set Monica’s mind at ease. “I was more surprised that the family court judge gave me sole custody of you. Those few months were so hard.”
Monica hugged her mom. She recalled all the visits from DHS for things as petty as a low score on homework or limping because a soccer ball drilled her in her knee. Her personal favorite DHS visit was on the heels of a piano recital when Lily beat her on scores. Since Monica didn’t win, she was allegedly crying out for help to get away from Evelyn. She could go on, but she’d probably graduate from college before she was finished with her list.
“I remember,” Monica said softly. “I understand that I’m related to Molly and Ryan. But that doesn’t mean I like it. I hate them for leaving us. I hate Molly for trying to take me away from you. I don’t care if I never see them again.”
Evelyn pulled Monica into her, cradling her daughter’s head on her shoulder. She held her tight when she started crying a moment later. “It’s okay, sweetheart. What we have now is so much better. Debra and Tricia love us. We built a stable, loving family, and we’re sharing that love and stability with Kendra. Your emotions are your own, Monica. You can be upset over the way Molly and Ryan treated us. Just don’t lose track of what we gained from it. We’re in a much better place now, sweetheart.”
Duet (Readdie Family Book 1) Page 9