eyond Desire Collection

by JS Scott, M Malone, Marie Hall, et al

  Her eyes met his. “Really? I’d love to go. But wait, what about the kids?”

  “We can pick them up after we get back. I already asked Katie if she’d mind them staying a little longer. I want you to meet the new group I’m producing. Besides, I don’t want to be away from you right now.”

  Ridley turned her face into his shoulder and placed her hand in the middle of his chest. The soft touch warmed him unlike anything else. “I don’t want to be away from you, either,” she finally admitted.

  Watching the wind lift her hair and the golden glint of the late evening sun off her smooth cheeks made him realize how vulnerable she was.

  “Come on. It doesn’t take long to get there but I don’t want to be out too late.” He held out a hand and pulled her to her feet.

  It wasn’t her fault that she’d trusted the wrong person in the past. He’d done the same and didn’t want anyone judging him for it. Hadn’t she already paid the price for her mistake? The night she’d told him about the accident, the emotion in her eyes had been real. She’d been scared and she’d done the only thing she could do. Run.

  I don’t believe she’s a scam artist. I don’t care what Nick says.

  ***

  “Okay, guys, I briefed Jackson on the nature of the problem, so now we have to figure out how to deal with it.” Mac, Jackson’s assistant, spoke quickly as though he had somewhere else to go.

  Ridley sat back in a hard plastic chair and assessed the annoying, albeit beautiful, members of Divine. She was excited to see what Jackson did at work but was a little disappointed that what she’d seen so far didn’t look much different than an ordinary office. She’d never been inside a real recording studio and had been expecting something really high-tech and different.

  You’ve been watching too much TV.

  “Okay, girls. I’m going to do everything I can to push the single out right away. If we’re lucky, it’ll catch on and we can book you guys as the opening act on a small tour before Kaylee gets close to her due date.”

  Jackson looked at Ridley and rolled his eyes. She hid her smile behind her hand. The girls weren’t even pretending to listen.

  Two of the group members, Mandy Johnson and Christina Milado, were in the corner arguing. Sasha Whitman, a friendly, slim woman with a cocoa complexion and a bright smile, was sitting just to her left. She had been asking Ridley questions about her relationship with Jackson since she’d arrived. There were only so many ways she could play dumb and pretend they were just friends.

  Her gaze finally came to rest on the fourth member of the group, standing at the window, distanced from the other members as much in body as she was in spirit. She couldn’t figure out how Kaylee Wilhelm had ever hooked up with the other three girls in the first place. She had a sad, sort of haunted look about her, and seemed extremely unaware of her own talent. With her rounded figure she was not the same “bombshell” type as the other girls, but she was beautiful in a unique way. She also had the best voice. Clear as a bell and capable of hitting notes that made her breath catch.

  “Okay, why don’t we just address the elephant in the room? There’s no point in dancing around the problem.”

  “This is a little more than a problem. This dumb whore got herself knocked up and we haven’t even had a chance to shoot our first video,” Christina said.

  All conversation stopped. Everyone turned to look at Kaylee. She didn’t turn from the window.

  “Tina, we aren’t going to get anywhere by you slinging insults around. If you don’t have anything constructive to offer, then you shouldn’t be here.” Jackson nailed her with a steely look when she opened her mouth to complain. Once he was sure she wasn’t going to interfere again, he turned his attention back to Kaylee.

  “Kay, look, it’s not a big deal. I had a similar problem with another group and we managed to shoot the video around it. I want you to know how important you are to the group and we’ll support you no matter what you decide to do.”

  Ridley thought he had gotten through to her when she turned around. When he saw the tears running down her face, he grabbed the tissues on the desk and offered them to her. She snatched them with a sob.

  “My baby is not a problem . There’s no decision to make. I love this baby and I am not giving it up!”

  She hurled each statement as if hoping to pierce him dead through the heart. Suddenly she tossed the box of tissues on the ground and stormed over to the door.

  “If she stomps any harder the roof might cave in.”

  Christina’s snide comment was made in a stage whisper, obviously intended for everyone to hear. She didn’t even bother to wipe the smirk off her face when Kaylee turned around and slowly walked back in front of her. Instead she met her gaze straight on, even had the nerve to raise an eyebrow as if to say “Whatcha gonna do?”

  Ridley had heard enough. She put two fingers in her mouth and let out a piercing whistle. “Everybody shut up!”

  They all turned to look at Ridley in disbelief.

  “She’s about a hundred pounds soaking wet. Does she know she’s about to get her ass kicked?” Mac’s whisper was loud enough to be heard all the way across the room.

  “Uh, ladies, let’s all calm down—” Jackson stopped in disbelief when Ridley held up a hand, cutting him off.

  “First of all,” she said, looking directly at Christina, “no one in here is perfect, but you are the last person who needs to make comments about someone else’s appearance. Clearly you’ve had things you weren’t too happy about with your body as well.” She looked down at the other woman’s obviously fake breasts and widened her eyes theatrically.

  Muffled laughter broke out behind Christina and she whipped around. The other girls straightened up and tried, unsuccessfully, to hide their smirks. Kaylee still looked angry but at least she didn’t look like she was about to fight anymore.

  Ridley turned to Kaylee. “Second of all, Jackson didn’t mean anything by what he said. Your baby is not a problem.”

  “Well, that’s what he said.”

  “Look, I get that you’re hormonal, but he’s a guy . Since when do guys ever say the right thing?” Ridley waited until Kaylee acknowledged that with a small smile before she turned to the rest of the group.

  “Baby fever is all over Hollywood right now. Why don’t we call in a tip to the paparazzi that a member of the hot new group Divine is pregnant? Kaylee will be photographed shopping for baby clothes with her happy bandmates around her and we’ll circulate a rumor that the baby’s father is someone famous.”

  “Only if we say it’s Idris Elba,” Kaylee interrupted.

  “Not him.”

  “Why not?” Christina asked suspiciously.

  “Because he’s mine,” Ridley shot back. The other girls erupted into a chorus of catcalls. Even Christina gave her a begrudging smile.

  Ridley pulled out her cell phone. “I’ll ask my sister for some names. If anyone is good at fooling the press, it’s her. In the meantime, why don’t you all finish recording and I’ll figure out the best place for you to be seen shopping for baby clothes.”

  Chapter Eighteen

  Jackson watched in amazement as the girls nodded their approval of her plan and started discussing the song. Christina and Kaylee stood on opposite sides of the group, but still. They were there and they weren’t fighting.

  He walked up to Ridley and laid his hands on her shoulders. “You’re really good at that, you know.”

  “What?” She turned in his arms, snuggling against his chest so her head fit right below his chin.

  “Calming people down. Cutting through the drama to the heart of the thing. I’m not sure if there’s a name for that but I’d hire you in a heartbeat. Especially since this is the part of the business that I hate, handling different personalities and getting them to all work together.”

  “I’ve had a lifetime of dealing with Raina. I consider it on-the-job training.”

  “Hey, guys? Sorry to interrupt.”

>   They turned to see Kaylee standing directly behind them. “The girls and I decided to record first thing tomorrow. I’m not at my best right now and I think if we try to force it we’ll just be wasting your time.”

  “I agree. Let’s call it a night everyone,” Jackson said. “I’ll expect you back in the morning, ready to work.”

  Ridley waved at each of the girls as they left. After he gathered a few things from a table in the corner, Mac left, too.

  “I thought they’d never leave.” Jackson picked up a guitar from a stand in the corner and strummed a few bars. It was a little out of tune. He used to get new song ideas all the time but it had been awhile since he’d played in the office.

  “I guess we should go, too. I’m sure the boys will be exhausted.” She looked tired but happy.

  “Not yet. There’s something I want to show you first.”

  He grabbed her hand and pulled her to the door at the back of the room, walking quickly before he could lose his nerve. He pushed it open and walked in. Ridley followed, her eyes wide.

  “Wow. It looks just like I imagined it would.”

  He could barely contain his excitement as he pointed her to the chair in front of the recording console.

  “This is a thirty-two-channel API analog console. I just bought it last year. It’s top of the line. I prefer analog because it just gives a better sound. When I want to hear music, I want to hear the real thing.”

  She sat delicately and swiveled toward the desk. “I’m afraid to touch anything. This looks really expensive.”

  “Well, yeah, it is. It’s about a hundred grand or so.”

  She gaped at him before folding her hands in her lap. “Oh my god. No wonder it looks like the controls of a spaceship. What does all this do?”

  “I’m going to show you.” He flipped a few switches. The red light that showed he was recording blinked back at him.

  He handed her a pair of earphones. “Here, put these on.”

  He couldn’t look at her as he pushed through another door into the recording room. She sat up straighter and watched him through the glass as he set the old guitar down in the middle of the room.

  “This was one of my first guitars.” He spoke up slightly even though he knew she could hear him perfectly. Everything in the recording room was being transmitted back to her through the earphones.

  She pointed at the earphones in confusion. He ignored her and pulled a short stool from the corner over to the microphone in the middle of the room. After adjusting the microphone, he picked up his guitar and strummed it a few times. He worked his way down the scale, fret by fret, tightening the tuning pegs until it sounded right.

  “I bought it at a secondhand shop while I was in college. I have better ones now, of course. Electric ones. Expensive ones. But sometimes when I start hearing the notes of a new song, all I want is to strum bars on this old thing. That’s how I know if the song is any good or not. Truly good music doesn’t need accompaniment or a lot of studio tricks. It hits you right here.” He held his hand over his heart. “Even when it’s just a guy on a stool playing a guitar that’s older than he is.”

  She didn’t say anything, just watched him with those huge eyes that saw everything. It was just as well, because he had no idea how to explain what he was about to do. So, he just strummed a few more bars and then began to sing.

  Mama always said to me

  You’ll know you’ve found the one

  When every day seems so short

  And you’d give it all up for

  Just one more day

  Daddy always told me

  That love was like a gift

  But even gifts come with a price

  But I’d pay anything for

  Just one more day

  For so long I thought I was broken

  That I had nothing left inside

  Until the day I met you

  And all I wanted was

  Just one more day

  Just one more day with you

  My love

  Is all I need to survive

  One more day

  He let the last note fade away before looking up. It was so silent in the room, the only sound his breathing and the fading hum of the guitar strings. Even through the glass, he could tell Ridley had her eyes closed.

  He’d made an impulsive decision to play for her but he wasn’t sure what had made him play a song he hadn’t even finished writing. When she’d asked to hear some of his music, he’d originally been planning to play her one of the songs he’d written in the past. Songs that had been on the radio and billboard charts. Songs he had reason to believe a lot of people thought were good.

  But when he’d turned around and seen her watching him and realized they were all alone, the song he’d had swimming around in his head for the past week had been the only thing on his mind. In that moment, he’d wanted to share it with her. To show her, in a way that nothing else could, what he was feeling.

  It felt like an eternity before she opened her eyes. She let out a small breath and then shook her head. When she didn’t say anything, his heart sank.

  ***

  “I can’t even imagine having that kind of talent.”

  Jackson gestured to his ears and she realized he couldn’t hear her. She pulled the headphones off and set them down gently. She walked through the door into the glass-walled room where Jackson was.

  “So, what did you think?”

  “I’m blown away. That’s what I was saying in there. I can’t imagine being so talented.”

  His shoulders sagged and she realized that he’d been waiting for her approval. This amazing man was waiting for what she thought.

  What she felt.

  “I’m glad you liked it.” He stood and leaned the guitar against the stool.

  Ridley followed him as he left the room and pulled the door closed behind them. She was honored that he’d been willing to sing for her when she knew how hard it was for him. It felt like they’d taken another step today, toward what she wasn’t sure, but wherever it led, she was willing to find out.

  She was hesitant to ask too many questions, afraid he would tense up and pull away from her again, but she found herself asking, “Is that one of the songs Divine is going to record?”

  “No. Not every song I write ends up being good enough to record, unfortunately. I’m probably going to end up scrapping it since I can’t quite get the music right.”

  She met his eyes. “It sounded perfect to me.”

  He stopped. They stood staring at each other for a moment before he tipped her chin up. He pressed his lips to hers gently. Ridley stood still, completely stunned. He’d kissed her many times. Sudden kisses. Shockingly erotic kisses. Kisses in places she couldn’t even say out loud.

  But he’d never kissed her like this. Like he just wanted to be close to her. Not for anything sexual but just because he craved her presence.

  On the ride home Jackson seemed unusually quiet and Ridley didn’t try to fill the silence with small talk. She was too preoccupied with her own thoughts about the events of the night.

  They pulled into the Masons’ driveway and Jackson left the car running while he jogged up the steps and hit the doorbell. Katie opened the door, juggling a tricycle and a toddler. Jackson grabbed the tricycle before it hit him in the shins and chucked the toddler under the chin. A second later, he came back down the driveway carrying Jase while Chris followed. After he buckled them both into their car seats, they continued down the street.

  After they entered the house, the boys ran up the stairs, stomping and shrieking. Jackson waited until they were out of sight before grabbing Ridley around the waist and burying his face in her hair.

  “Sorry for all the drama tonight. I should have warned you what we were dealing with before we got there.”

  She turned in his embrace and wrapped her arms around his neck. She breathed in his earthy scent before turning her face up to his.

  “It’s okay. I’m just
glad I was there. I really think Kaylee is having a hard time.”

  “I’m glad you were there, too.”

  Stroking a hand down the side of his cheek, she felt his quick intake of breath. His cheek felt rough against her palm and he turned his head to press a kiss to her fingers.

  Ridley sucked in a breath at the look of tenderness that crossed Jackson’s face. She swallowed against the sudden lump in her throat. There were so many things she wanted to tell him. That she was sorry for bringing up bad memories. That his wife’s accident wasn’t his fault.

  That she couldn’t imagine her life without him.

  But what if he wasn’t ready to hear it? Things were moving so fast and she had no idea if he would feel the same way. She couldn’t take it if she bared her heart only to realize he wasn’t capable of returning her feelings.

  A door slammed upstairs and they jumped apart.

  “I guess I should get the boys ready for bed.” Jackson kissed her forehead and then crossed to the stairs. She watched him go, temporarily hypnotized by the sight of his broad shoulders flexing beneath his shirt.

  The man didn’t know the effect he had on her. She couldn’t seem to think about anything other than being with him. Making love to him.

  That’s because you’re falling in love with him.

  There had been no words of love spoken between them, just words of passion. She was old enough and wise enough to know the difference. They’d agreed to a “no-strings” arrangement just to avoid these types of entanglements. And she couldn’t blame him for that. She’d started this knowing exactly what she was getting into. She wouldn’t allow her pride to get in the way of enjoying the time they did have together. She could be cosmopolitan and sophisticated if she had to be. She would act as if it was no big deal and she wouldn’t cry her eyes out over a man who obviously didn’t love her.

  But she couldn’t deny that the day he decided he was done with her was going to tear her heart out.