by Aly Martinez
"You don't have to thank me! That was my pleasure." His face is heated, and I wonder if he is as worked up as I felt just a few minutes ago. I may not be very experienced in the oral department, but I can't leave him hanging like this.
"Good, then you won’t mind if I return the favor?" I say shyly.
"No babe, this is not a tit for tat type deal, I wanted to do that. I don't expect anything in return."
"Well," I start trying to dredge up some courage, "maybe I want to do this." I quickly move on top of him. I can see the bulge under his zipper. I swallow nervously while giving myself a mental pep talk. I'm scared I'm not going to do this right, but I would be stupid to pass up this chance with Brett.
I begin to sink between his legs, but he stops by pulling me to my feet. “I don’t want you on your knees, babe. Come on, let’s go to my room.” He grabs the blanket off his couch, and pulls it around me. He scoops up my discarded clothes, and leads me to his room. As soon as we reach his bed, he plucks the blanket away from my naked body.
“Now where were we?” He winks at me and pulls me onto the bed on top of him.
I, once again, slide down his body and settle between his legs. I take my time to really study him. He's an undeniably beautiful man, but I can see a few faint scars across his chest which remind me that he's no more perfect that I am.
I snap out of my thoughts as I hear him chuckle, "See something you like?" Actually, I see a lot I like, but I'm not about to tell him that. I just blush and awkwardly look away.
"Don't do that, babe. Don't get embarrassed and hide your pretty face," he says quietly. That’s easy for him to say. What does he have to be insecure about, a few scars on his chest? He’s so sexy, women probably throw themselves at him daily. What the heck does he want with a girl like me?
I have no idea what I’m doing here. Sure, I’ve gone down on a guy a few times before, but only one other guy. I’m definitely not as skilled as Brett. Here I am, talking myself out of being with him. He wants me, and he just showed me how much. It's time for me to step it up, and show him how much I want him as well. No more stalling, I'm doing this.
I lean forward and begin kissing down his stomach. I can only hope what I'm about to do for him, will make him feel even half of the way he made me feel. When my mouth reaches the button of his jeans, I peek up at him through my lashes.
"Go ahead, Jess, you don't have to ask for permission. Don't do anything you’re not comfortable with. I enjoyed making you come. No payback is needed."
GAH! The things this man says to me. Suddenly, I can feel the heat between my legs again. I undo the button of his jeans and slide the zipper down. Lifting his hips, he makes it easier for me to pull them down his toned legs. I toss them aside, but I can't take my eyes off the tight boxer briefs. They hug his sculpted body and his very large, very obvious arousal. I swallow, but hesitate for only a moment. I don't want him to think I am doing this out of obligation. I'm doing this for the best reason of all, because I want to.
I slide his boxers down his legs and his hard-on bobs, lightly slapping his stomach when I release it. Oh my God, is it possible for a man to have a beautiful penis? Because I can find no other words to describe it. I never really thought about a man in that way before, but Brett is no ordinary man.
I bend down, and pepper light kisses over his abdomen. I can't help but smile when his muscles tense beneath me. With a quick breath, he relaxes back on the bed, placing his hands under his head so he can see me. Slowly moving down towards his hard-on and mimicking Brett's earlier move, I kiss the insides of this thighs. I’m rewarded with a softly whispered curse word.
Letting the saliva pool in my mouth, I run my tongue up his length and wrap my lips around the tip. He lets out a groan, and it gives me all the encouragement I need. I wrap the other hand around the base of his shaft, and slowly take him inside my mouth. When I feel him hit the back of my throat, I pull back slowly. Adjusting my hand so it’s wrapped where my mouth stops, I bob my head up and down a few times to get him nice and wet.
"Fuck, Jess. You feel so good." Hearing his words gives me even more confidence. I start sucking him into my mouth faster, and work my slick hand up and down his shaft. The moans that I hear coming from Brett must mean that I'm doing something right. I decide to press my luck and try a little trick Kara has told me about a million times. Tentatively, I reach down and stroke his balls, never slowing my relentless rhythm up top.
"Fuck...Jess," his voice is deep and gritty. "Gorgeous, if you do that one more time I'm going to come in that hot little mouth of yours, and I'm really trying to be a gentleman here." Of course I continue. If anything, I quicken my pace, sliding him in and out of my mouth faster. I don't stop my hand. He made me go wild under his touch. I want to do the same for him. I feel his muscles going taut before he says, "Damn it, Jess. I'm going to come..."
Suddenly, he pulls himself out of my mouth with a loud pop and grips himself. Running his hand up and down his shaft, come spurts onto his stomach. I can't help but feel disappointed as I watch him finish himself off. Feeling vulnerable, I back away just a bit. I have no idea why he did that? He got to feel me come against his mouth, and as worried as I was when I started this, I was looking forward to giving him that too. Did I do something wrong? Was I not doing it right? The sounds he made were definitely those of a man enjoying himself. Oh, God. It sucked and he was just trying to make me feel better by saying those things to me.
Feeling like a failure, I subtly try to cover myself, but it’s no use. I sit between this handsome man’s legs humiliated, watching as the last of his orgasm leaves him sated and smiling. Too bad there’s no smile on my face.
Brett
I COME down from the most amazing high I've ever felt. I never expected anything so bold and sexy from Jess. She is always so timid and nervous. Even when she started I thought I was going to have to coach her though how to give a proper blow job. But the moment her lips wrapped around my dick, I knew she had it under control. I've never come harder, or quicker, in my life. I could blame it on my years without a woman, but I think it has more to do with Jess than I'm even willing to admit right now. I didn't think she would be so enthusiastic, or possibly even willing to do it at all, but I'm quickly learning to never underestimate this woman.
I feel her move from between my legs, but I’m nowhere near done with her. I reach out to grab her. I need to clean up, so this party is officially moving to the shower. I grab her hips before she can roll off the bed. “Oh, I'm not finished with you. Where are you going?"
"It's really late," she says quietly, all the confidence gone from her voice. Shit. I'm hoping she's just a little awkward after the fact, so I go with what I know best, flirty humor.
"Did you use me for my body?" I tease and when her head snaps up to my eyes, I can tell that was the wrong move. The hurt and embarrassment are written all over her face, which makes my heart sink and, honestly, thoroughly baffles me.
"Jesus Jess, are you alright? What's going on in that beautiful head of yours?" Even before she can answer, my mind flies to all the possible answers. Did I push her too far? I wasn't expecting anything from her tonight. She was more than a willing participant in that, or at least that's what it felt like.
"It's just...I'm just...I don't know."
"No way. We just spent the last hour getting to know each other intimately, you're not locking up on me now. Talk to me."
She lets out a resigned breath before answering. At least she's rational. "Why did you stop me?"
"Stop you? I didn't stop you?"
"You pulled away from me, just before you, um...finished," she says, glancing down to my stomach, reminding me that I'm chatting while still covered in come. Wonderful.
I stand up and head into the bathroom. I grab a wash cloth and quickly cleaning myself off. When I walk back into the room, she's already half-dressed.
"What are you doing?" I knew she was bothered by something, but I didn't expect her to be bolting out the door alread
y. "You aren't going anywhere until you sit and talk to me. This is crazy, Jess. You aren't running out of here after what we just did.”
"You're you, Brett. And I'm just inexperienced little Jesse Addison." She stops talking, as if she just explained it all.
"What does that even mean? I'm sorry, but you are going have to stop talking in code and just tell me what's going on here. I'm obviously not following the bouncing ball." I can see the gears turning in her mind. She has some sort of internal debate going on, and it almost worries me.
"I didn't realize I was doing a bad job, when I was um, doing that to you. It's just that I've not done that a whole lot, and I just...you made some noises, so I thought I was doing a good job. Maybe next time you could tell me what you like. I mean, if there is a next time. I understand if there isn't though. I'm sorry, you had to, you know, finish it yourself. I could probably get better." She rambles out as fast as she can. It may make me an asshole, but when I see this beautiful woman standing in a bra and panties, and acting self-conscious after giving the best head I've ever had, it causes my eyes to go wide and a smile to spread across my face. I mean, she's upset that I didn't come in her mouth. This might be the best conversation I have ever had in my life.
"No." I answer shortly. I know I must be grinning like a mad man because I can see her eyes narrow at me. I love the way she goes from shy to pissed, with only one smirk from me. If I ever do break this conservative woman out of her shell, she is going to be quite the handful. That thought only makes my smile widen. Cause and effect, pissing her off more. We stand staring at each other. Arguing with no words. It's an evil stare down, my humor versus her insecurities, but I need to wave the white flag before lightning bolts shoot from her eyes.
"You are absolutely, one hundred percent, not allowed to get any better at sucking my dick." Her cheeks flash pink and her eyes widen at my dirty words. I purposely try to poke the beast a little more. I love seeing her mad. It's adorable and a little terrifying too. But most importantly, it's sexy as hell.
"Gorgeous, you've had me in your mouth once. I'm already half tempted to quit my job and lock us both in this apartment for the rest of our lives. We can survive solely on protein shakes, beer, and Chinese takeout. So no, you are not allowed to get any better. If you do, it might convince the other half of my brain to follow through with that ridiculous plan."
I pause walking over pulling the dress she was holding in front of her out of her hand. "I'm honestly a little afraid for you Jess. If your mouth was any preview of how it's going to be when I get inside of you, there is a very good chance you may never see the light of day again."
I reach down dipping my finger into the top of her bra brushing against her nipple. "Did you want me to come in your mouth?" I look down to find, just as I hoped, all anger and embarrassment erased from her face. All that's left is pure heated desire.
When she doesn't answer me, I take it one step further pushing a hand into her panties. "Did you, babe?" I ask again and push the tip of my finger inside her. She lets out a loud gasp reaching forward using my biceps to balance. Leaning her head against my chest, she nods.
"Jesse, you have to stop worrying so much. I like you, and I enjoyed the hell out of everything you did tonight." I wrap my free hand around cupping her perfect ass. "I loved everything about what happened in that bed. Have a little faith that I'll be honest with you. If I don't like something, you'll know right away. However, I want you to be comfortable enough to try. Okay?" Again she only nods.
"Now, I want to get you naked and try all of that again, just to make sure we both enjoyed it as much as we think we did. Purely for research purposes. For the betterment of science." She lets out the most amazing giggle. I swear I can feel it in my soul.
It really should terrify me. If I was a smarter man, this would have been the moment I realized things were moving entirely too fast. I would have put some space between us, backed up, and recognized I was getting in too deep. It's been two dates. My soul isn't supposed to be anywhere near this yet. However, I'm not a smart man, so I suck in a deep breath and revel in feeling something again for the first time in over four years.
Brett
WHEN THURSDAY night rolled around, I was in no mood to go visit Sarah. Things had been getting worse with her recently. She's hated me for a long time. I like to think that I have gotten used to that over the years, but every time I see her it still burns. When I look into her eyes, I can still see the wild and crazy woman hiding underneath her sad, broken exterior. She is only a shadow of the woman I used to love. She's lost too much weight over the years, and for a woman who used to love shopping, she is almost always wearing yoga pants and t-shirts these days.
Two years ago, Sarah cut off all her beautiful blonde hair and dyed it red. I'm not talking just any color red either. She dyed it a shade of red that is not found naturally...anywhere. It's definitely not like Manda's deep vibrant shade of wine. Sarah's hair is the color of a fire engine. Ronald McDonald would probably sue for trademark infringement.
The first time I saw her new hair, I picked up a vase that was sitting on her kitchen counter and shattered it against her living room wall. I turned and immediately walked out, slamming the front door and causing a nearby picture frames to fall to the floor. I had already lost her mentally, but that was the first time I didn't recognize her physically.
I mourned her loss all over again that night. I stayed up for hours alternating between drinking beer, breaking things, and punching holes in my walls. It killed me, and not because I'm one of those superficial assholes that cares when my woman cuts or colors her hair. It was just one more thing about Sarah that was lost to me.
"Wow, is it Thursday again already?" Sarah asks, pulling the door open.
"Yep." I walk in carrying take out gyros. Her favorite.
"Did you get extra Z sauce and feta?"
"Don't I always?"
"Whatever." She walks to the kitchen, pulling two beers out of the fridge.
"What have you been up to since the last time I was graced with your presence?" She asks, but I know she doesn't care. It's a common courtesy she offers every week. She tunes out the moment I open my mouth to respond.
"We need to talk." I say while moving to sit down on the couch.
“This should be good. What did I do wrong this time?"
"Don't start with the attitude, Sarah."
"If you don't want my attitude, don't come over anymore."
"Do you ever get sick of being pissy all the time?"
"Nope! Do you ever get sick of hanging out where you're not wanted?" I shake my head and sigh. I'm exhausted from this back and forth we do all the time. It used to be something I just accepted, but after hanging out with Jesse for a few days, I don't have the patience for Sarah's verbal abuse anymore.
"Look, I'm not doing this tonight."
"Oh, yippee!" she says sarcastically. "You know where the door is. You don't have to do anything tonight."
"I met someone." I rush out before she has a chance to unleash anymore of her bitchiness. I've become the master of ignoring her snarky comments, but that doesn't mean I’m immune. It still hurts like hell when she treats me like shit under her shoes.
"What the fuck!" she yells, shocking me with her reaction. I was expecting her to throw a freaking party, but judging by her tone I have definitely pissed her off again. "You met someone?" She jumps from her seat and leans into my face aggressively.
"What is your problem?"
"You are my problem, Brett! I have been asking for a divorce for years. YEARS!" she screams, only inches from my face. I slide over far enough to get up without having to touch her. She has that crazy look in her eye and I know if I sit there even a minute longer, she will slap me. New Sarah has zero issues getting physical during an argument. Sometimes, I think she hits me just because she knows I'll leave as soon as she does.
"So, this should make you ecstatic then!"
"You are such a dumb fuck!"
"Wow, thanks! Got any other cuss words you want to try out on me?" I know I'm not making this any better, but damn it gets under my skin when she starts acting like this. I try to reel it in though, hopefully we can have this conversation before shit completely hits the fan. "Look, can you please calm down."
"So…let me get this straight. I have been begging for a divorce and you fought me at every turn. I hired a divorce attorney, you and Caleb pulled some strings and had him drop me as a client. So, I very kindly ask you for a divorce, and you give me some bullshit reason why we needed to stay married."
"Sarah, you have no job. You need my health insurance for all your...care."
"I have money! I can pay my own damn medical bills."
"That settlement from the wreck isn't going to last forever. Why would you waste it on expensive doctors’ bills?"
"So us staying married was only so I could use your health insurance?" I can't answer her without lying, so I stay silent.
"I didn't think so. You are a selfish son of a bitch, Brett Sharp. You have made me fight to get rid of you, yet you still show up week after week like a lost little puppy dog who can't find a home. I only let you in on Thursdays because I feel sorry for you. It's pathetic! Now you stand here and tell me that you're in love with someone else, so I guess I'm finally allowed to move on with my life, huh?"
"I didn't say that I'm in love with Jesse."
"Oh goodie, your soul mate has a name. Jesse, how perfect."
"Are you jealous?" I ask, almost humorously.
"Hell, no! I'm pissed. You have been smothering me for years. Now some little tramp comes along spreading her legs, and suddenly I'm allowed to move on with my life?" she says, and her slam about Jesse makes me lose all my calm and rational thoughts.
"I'm not going to say this again, Sarah, so I want you to listen very closely. Don't you dare talk about Jess like that. You can call me whatever you want, but you will watch your damn mouth when it comes to her."
"Oh my God. You are such a tool!" She busts out laughing as if I told a joke. "She must be really dirty in the sack to have turned you into such a pussy already. If I recall correctly, that's how you like it. Dirty, right?" She continues laughing, pausing to bite her lip and questioningly lift an eyebrow.