Dispersion

  The door automatically shuts behind him. Jess leans against the wall and brushes some escaped hair back behind her ear.

  “The noises he was making…” I let the thought float in the air.

  She rubs her forehead and sits down. “I know. I’m glad Allison isn’t here.”

  I sit opposite her, both of our legs spread in front of us, our feet almost touching.

  Every time I think we are past Matt’s death and safe, something like this happens. As horrible as it sounds, even though it’s terrible that Jordan was bitten, I only met him today. It’s not like him dying should be anywhere as painful as losing my mother, Chris and Andrew, or even Carly. Yet, Jordan is still a person. Do I not care as much anymore?

  I let out a deep breath at that musing. This isn’t something I want to start affecting me less.

  “Will it ever end?” I ask.

  The two of us look at each other. Her brown eyes are so beautiful, despite the pain in them. More than anything, I want to sit next to her and pull her into my arms. I want to give her support and take hers.

  She drops her eyes again. “I hope so.”

  We sit in silence, neither of us feeling the need to say anything, probably because there isn’t anything to say. All of our hopes for the future won’t change the reality of today. No matter how far we get from the infection the genetic engineers forced upon us, we can’t truly escape it.

  The door opens, snapping my attention to an alarmed Jonah. He spots us on the ground and straightens his shoulders.

  “Silas has requested that the two of you and your brother come see him immediately,” he says.

  I let out a sigh and stand. Of course he’s going to want an explanation about what happened. He’s going to have to answer for it.

  “Jess should stay with Jordan. It wouldn’t be a good idea if we left him alone,” I say.

  “I am to escort all three of you,” he says and walks through us to get to Dominic.

  Jess shrugs. “Jordan won’t be turning for another few hours. Let’s not waste our time arguing with him. The sooner we share our story, the sooner we’ll be back here to monitor the situation.”

  Dominic must have reached the same conclusion because he joins us, looking annoyed, and exits the infirmary. Jess and I follow him out while Jonah takes the rear, making sure we don’t stray from our path.

  Dominic keeps a quick pace, to the point where I’m almost jogging to keep up, and bursts into Silas’s office without knocking.

  Sitting behind his grand desk, Silas blinks at our abrupt entrance and says, “Thank you, Jonah. Please leave us.”

  Jonah’s face falls, but, as always, he follows his orders.

  “How did it get here?” Silas asks without preamble once the door closes behind him, taking away what limited light the hallway provided.

  Even though there is a the window behind Silas, nothing comes through it as darkness has fallen. The small lamp on the corner of the desk is the only source of light. It casts half of Silas’s face in shadows, giving him a dangerous edge.

  “It must have walked here from one of the territories,” Dominic responds as he sits down in one of the chairs opposite Silas’s desk.

  I gesture toward the other chair for Jess and she sits down, with me between the two of them.

  “But it was alone?”

  “Yes,” I start and have to clear my throat. “There will be more.”

  He shakes his head and rubs his forehead. “I thought we would be spared from the devil’s agents. Jordan must’ve sinned.”

  Jess jerks her head up. “He’s sixteen,” she says in disbelief, her voice raised. Even Dominic looks surprised.

  Silas continues as if he didn’t hear her. “I must push the message of God even harder tomorrow morning. I’m not getting through to everyone.”

  “We need to start a watch and teach everyone how to protect themselves,” I say. “Otherwise, there are going to be more attacks and deaths.”

  Jess nods while Silas shakes his head. “I must pray on this issue. God will lead the way.”

  “We cannot rely on prayer to eliminate this problem,” Dominic says.

  “You have come from the territories where everyone has completely disregarded religion, so I’ll try my best to ignore your comment. Soon enough, boy, you will learn that through God, everything is possible.” Silas’s voice is even, but there’s a sharpness to it.

  Dominic’s fingers tap on his thigh. “I’ve been listening to your sermons and I understand where you’re coming from.”

  “Then why are you questioning me?” Silas asks as he stares at Dominic, not blinking.

  I tilt my head slightly at his words. Dominic isn’t questioning him; he’s doubting his God. Can he not tell the difference?

  “Prayer alone will not protect you from the Letum, but I can. Let me get a group together to train to ensure no one else gets hurt. God sent us here for a reason. That’s what you believe, isn’t it?”

  Silas rubs his chin, where his stubble from the long day is starting to show. “Are you playing me now, boy, or do you believe that?”

  “Does it matter as long as it is what you believe?”

  Silas’s eyes flicker toward the Bible on his bookshelf in the corner of his bare room. He stares at it in deep thought.

  None of us make a noise. The only sound in the room is the light ticking from the grandfather clock in the other corner. Its noise becomes louder with each passing second. Dominic’s fingers continue to tap against his thigh.

  Silas lets out a deep breath and finally breaks the pause. “I don’t want a watch all day. It will cause panic throughout the population. I will, however, permit your group to conduct a daily walk around the compound to watch for any of the sinful creatures.”

  “That isn’t enough,” Jess says. “It won’t catch them all.”

  “I agree,” I say. “This isn’t going to cast a wide enough net. We also need to start training members of your compound on how to adequately protect themselves.”

  Silas raises his hand to silence us. “This is what we’ll start with. If there proves to be a greater need, we can revisit this conversation. This will be my compromise.”

  “Very well,” Dominic concedes. “Anything else?”

  Silas shakes his head and motions for us to leave. “That’s all.”

  The three of us walk out of his office. Once the door closes behind us, I let out a deep breath and feel some of the tension leave.

  Jess says, “I need to check back in with the infirmary. I’ll stay with Jordan through the end and make sure he’s taken care of.”

  “Do you want me to wait with you?” I ask, hopeful she will accept my offer.

  Instead, Jess shakes her head. “There’s no need for two of us to have to witness this. I’ll handle everything. Can you let Allison know that I may stay late at work today?”

  “Of course,” I say. “If you change your mind, let me know and I’ll come join you.”

  Jess quickens her pace to move ahead of us. As I watch her walk away, I can’t help but feel a twinge of disappointment. When we were sitting across from each other earlier, it almost felt like an echo of our connection was starting to come back, brought from our shared pain of the past.

  Jess turns the corner, leaving my field of vision.

  “We will start tomorrow during their church service,” Dominic says, breaking my line of thought. “If I ever have to go to another one of those, it will be too soon.”

  While I agree with him, it doesn’t seem like a good idea to miss the religious service. “Won’t that isolate us from them?”

  Dominic shrugs. “We already are.”

  I’m finally starting to fit in somewhere. I’m not sure if I want to work against that so soon after making friends. Well, after I let the Letum get to Jordan, I guess I’m not sure where I stand.

  “I don’t know…”

  Dominic stops walking and scoffs. “Oh, wake up. These people are idiots. Their concept o
f sin is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard of.” His fingers twitch. “It completely discounts the bigger picture. They say if you do one small thing, you’re damned? That’s it?”

  “One small thing…” I repeat. “You mean like killing someone?”

  His eyes darken. “If killing someone leads to saving more lives, then it was for the greater good. Their God should show some appreciation toward me, not send me to whatever hell they blab on and on about.”

  Dominic breathes heavily out of his nose, eyes narrowed.

  I take another step forward and turn my head away from him. I’m not going to get him to change his mind. What’s the point in trying? I’ve heard his justifications before.

  “Even if you believe that,” I respond, “you still think this is a good idea?”

  Despite not directly looking at him, I can sense his steely gaze piercing me. “You have seen how everyone acts during the services, right? I would be surprised if anyone notices if we are not there. They are all too focused on Silas and his messages of their hateful, vengeful God.”

  “Won’t it bother Silas if we don’t go? Surely he’ll notice,” I say, thinking of his focus on his Bible when we were in his office.

  “Silas knows we do not believe, and he is not doing anything. He firmly trusts that God sent us here for a reason and is trying to figure out exactly why that is. He is not concerned with saving us—as he always claims—he wants to make sure he stays in power.”

  Part Four

  Chapter Seventeen

  A week later, I yawn as I sort through a box full of fresh fruit. Dominic and I have been getting up even earlier than usual to make sure we have enough time for our morning walks around the compound. After the first day of not finding any of the Letum, we’ve been alternating mornings—partly because we’re both confident we can handle anything individually—and also as a result of my disdain for his company.

  Like every check before, this morning yielded nothing.

  While I’m glad no more of the Letum have reached us, it’s going to take a lot more exposure to the Letum for Silas to finally acknowledge how much of a threat they are to us. The more I think about it, the more it’s like he appeased us with his so-called compromise. He didn’t give anything up, only our own time.

  Footsteps echo down the hall toward our room as we sort through the most recent boxes of food.

  Leah pauses. “Who could that be?”

  I frown. The next shift isn’t supposed to be here yet. “Maybe the next group is getting here early?”

  Even as I say it, I know it’s not right. There’s only one set of footsteps coming down the hall.

  The footsteps get louder and louder until a figure steps through the hallway. It’s Jonah. Leah tilts her head as her eyes meet mine. What’s he doing down here?

  “Excellent,” he starts. “I was hoping to find you here, Elliot.”

  Not sure how else to respond, I say, “This is where I’m supposed to be during my assigned working hours.”

  Behind me, Leah snickers. Jonah glances her way, and she quickly gets herself back under control.

  “We haven’t had a lot of opportunities to speak, so I wanted to make sure you were comfortable. Do you have any questions or any concerns I can address at this point—especially considering recent events?”

  “Um…”

  He laughs good-naturedly at my response, but the laughter doesn’t quite reach his eyes. They’re still empty and stern.

  He continues his speech. “As Silas mentioned when you first got accepted into the compound, our culture is the most important aspect of who we are. It’s what makes this such a great place to live.”

  “It appears to be working for you,” I respond evenly.

  There’s still something wrong about his smile.

  “Now, the growth that we’ve had since the Civil War between the godforsaken territories that you grew up in has been the easy part, by far. What we’re most proud of is our people and the impact we’re able to have. I’m glad you’re going to be able to join that to be a productive member of our family.”

  Even though everything he’s saying is the right thing, something is off.

  He studies me, calculatingly. If he’s going to look at me like that, then I’m going to try to better gauge who he is as well. Two can play this game.

  “I guess I do have one question for you, if you don’t mind.” I say.

  “What would you like to know?”

  “You’re acting a little on edge. What’s going on?” I ask, curious how he’s going to respond.

  He flashes that same insincere smile and takes a seat on one of the full boxes by the door.

  Speaking with his hands, he begins his tangent. “It’s no big deal or anything to worry about. We’re as stable and secure as ever, I assure you. Some other people around here are overstepping their responsibilities. They’re trying to push their power and take control of areas in which they’ve no right. Simply put, they’re walking around like they own the place. They’re getting such big heads. Don’t they know who I am? Don’t they know I sit next to Silas every day? I can tell him any story I want to.”

  He pauses and collects his breath. “But, I don’t. Because even if they don’t have my back, I’m going to support them. It all eventually comes back to you, don’t you agree?”

  Mind racing at all that he’s said and the light it sheds on his character, I say, “Yes, I do agree.”

  “I hope this chat was helpful for you. I want you to know you can always come to me with anything that you need. I’m here to support you.”

  I don’t trust a single word coming out of his mouth.

  I purposefully refuse to make eye contact with Leah. Out of the corner of my eye, I can see her shaking with suppressed laughter that she quickly turns into a cough.

  “Yes,” I say. “I appreciate you speaking with me. It was enlightening.”

  Yet again, that smile of his flashes across his face as he stands up. “That made my day. If I can enlighten one person, that means my day was well spent.”

  Now, I’m biting my tongue as well. Is he so socially stunted that he doesn’t understand how ironic this conversation is?

  “I know how important it is to have a balance between work time and leisure. Why don’t the two of you go to lunch and call it day? I’ll join you in a bit. I want to browse around here first. I haven’t been in this area of the compound in too long.”

  “Thanks, Jonah,” I say in relief. I need to get out of this room before I start laughing openly.

  Leah grabs my hand and pulls me toward the door to leave. “Yeah, thanks.”

  The door closes behind us and Leah’s eyes are frantic as she tries to hold in her amusement.

  “Wait until he can’t hear us anymore,” I warn, though I’m struggling to hold in my laughter.

  Leah waits until we pass the corner before her laughter echoes throughout the space. “Can you believe he said that?” She snorts in amusement, her dark hair bouncing as she almost skips down the hall.

  Although a big part of me is horrified that he said it, that doesn’t stop me from laughing with her. “What was he thinking?” I ask as I walk down the hallway toward the Mess Hall with her.

  “The best part is…” Another wave of hysterical laughter takes over her body. “The best part is…” she continues. “He was absolutely serious. He didn’t say it as a joke. He truly holds himself in such high regard.”

  “How did he get in a position of power? I don’t understand it.” I shake my head in disbelief.

  It doesn’t matter what the foundations of society are like; shitty people always find a way to make it to the top.

  Leah gasps and makes an exaggerated horrified expression. “Eli, how could you ask such a question?” Her mouth twitches. “Don’t you know who he is?”

  “Unfortunately, I think I do,” I mutter as her laughter continues to ring out against the walls.

  She wipes the tears from her face a
nd companionably locks her arm with mine. Even though she probably wants more than I can give her, I don’t pull away. It’s nice not to feel alone.

  The noise of the rest of the compound gets louder as we turn another corner.

  “They all have such big heads. Don’t they know who I am?” Leah repeats under her breath again as she chuckles in disbelief.

  We walk into the Mess Hall, arm in arm, and Silas’s calculating eyes watch us from the center of the room where he’s conversing with a large group.

  I look away from Silas’s group of lackeys to see what meal they’re serving today for lunch. Whatever it is, it smells better than normal. They’ve splurged and cooked up some type of meat.

  The innocent sound of Josie’s cry catches my attention. About two tables to the right, Jess is holding Josie in one arm and trying to eat with the other.

  Her hair is up in a messy bun, though some of her dark curls are sticking out, uncooperatively. Her face is flushed as she peeks down at Josie. This is the healthiest she’s looked since we left for Potentia. She’s absolutely beautiful.

  I instinctively unlock arms with Leah and turn to the right.

  “Where are—?” Leah starts, but the noise of the loud, fake-sounding laughter from one of Silas’s companions cuts her off.

  As I approach Jess, her eyes dart up. She automatically tenses but relaxes once I sit down across the table from her.

  “Where’s Allison?” I ask as nonchalantly as I can.

  She looks beyond my head toward the hallway and shrugs. “She said she would be right back, but that was twenty minutes ago.”

  Josie fusses as Jess tries to take a bite of food and moves too much for Josie’s liking.

  “Here, let me take her for a bit while you eat,” I say and reach across the table.

  Jess gently hands Josie off. Not wanting to sleep but perfectly content to stare openly at the world above her—she’s started to track things with her eyes—she settles down.

  “You’re good with her, Elliot.”

  Jess stares intently at me, her forehead puckered. Her guard quickly shoots back up once our eyes meet and she takes another bite of her meal.