by Diana Currie
When I leave the room Adam uses the remote control to turn off the television. He flips the light switch back on and I know that I've completely ruined the rest of our evening. He stands to stretch as I creep back into the living room, my mood completely soured. Sometimes I hate being responsible and mature.
"I'm so sorry," I say again.
"No, it was my fault," he argues walking across the room to where I stand. "I lose myself in you, Amanda. I wasn't thinking. You're right, of course. If the kids had come down and seen us... I don't know how you would have explained that to them."
"I know I need to explain to them that mommy and daddy are not together anymore. I mean, they get that part already. But I worry about them seeing Tommy and me with other people. Tyler will have questions."
"You don't have to feel bad," Adam whispers.
He wraps his arms around me and kisses the top of my head. I'm sure he means it to be a comforting gesture but it makes me feel childlike. I'm not ready to have a sexual relationship with him yet and that makes me feel even more immature. Physically I'm ready to go, but my heart and mind are not quite there. I know I need to address the issue with Tommy. He deserves to know who is spending time with his children. Maybe once I deal with telling Tommy about Adam I will feel better about all of this.
"I'm going to go," he says stepping back and smiling at me.
"Okay. I'll see you tomorrow."
He kisses me tenderly once more and lets himself out. I go upstairs to my empty bed and spend over an hour staring at the blank ceiling, too many thoughts in my head to fall asleep.
Two days later Adam's brother officially begins the construction on the new house. I didn't even see Adam that day because he worked all morning and met with Andrew in the afternoon. He made sure to eat dinner at the B&B the next few nights but it wasn't really quality time. Matthew and Julie are still with us and the kids always make it difficult to carry on a meaningful conversation.
The next few days pass quickly. I am busier than usual with the additional guests in the house; cooking and cleaning more than I've been used to. I also have two more guests checking in tomorrow, which is Friday. They are a pair of businessmen in town on some kind of professional trip. I decide to place them upstairs to be further away from the honeymooners. I don't want to get any complaints about the noise level on the first floor which has been steady the past week.
Thursday afternoon I'm surprised to see Caroline and Bianca stop by the B&B unannounced. They catch me right in the middle of making dinner with flour on my apron and hair pulled up in a messy bun. I know I invited Bianca to come by anytime but she might have called first to give a girl a little warning. I haven't even picked up Tyler and Gabby from daycare yet. My eyes shift over to the coo coo clock for a brief second as I go to greet them in the foyer.
"Hi Caroline, Bianca. This is a pleasant surprise."
"Hi Amanda! Bianca is heading back to Atlanta tomorrow so I thought we'd pop in and see the place before she left." Caroline smiles brightly and glances around the rooms. Living room, dining room, and kitchen are all empty and thankfully tidy and dust free at the moment.
"Of course, come right in. You picked a good time," I lie while brushing a couple stay hairs off my face. "Let me just clean myself up and I'll give you the tour."
I throw my apron off and quickly rinse my hands under the faucet. Bianca smiles at me as I wipe the dishtowel across my face searching for traces of flour or breadcrumbs. Waving my hand towards the living room I guide Adam's family to where I generally begin when I give a tour of Thatcher's to a prospective guest.
Caroline and Bianca Brickman get the grand tour of the house and from what I can tell they're both fascinated by it. Bianca in particular has a real interest in historical homes and knows a lot of about the architecture of the time period. I show them the fireplace mantle made with local wood, point out the original hard wood floors beneath their high heeled feet. They both fall in love with the renovated kitchen that was made to look just as it once did eighty years ago during the house's prime. Caroline notes the lack of a dishwasher and we both have a laugh over it when I tell her that to me it feels like a big sacrifice for authenticity.
"I raised three boys who never stopped eating. I don't know what I would have done without a dishwasher, probably lose my mind, so I feel your pain, Amanda," she says wistfully.
Her words remind me of what Adam told me of his childhood, the strict upbringing, the piano lessons. Seeing Caroline now, so sophisticated and elegant, I can't picture her hunched over a sink full of dirty dishes and losing her patience with Adam and his brothers. But I suppose she must have at least a few times, every mother feels like screaming at one time or another.
I lead them up the narrow staircase and Bianca informs us that staircases didn't widen to their modern size until the fifties. There isn't much to see upstairs other than the subway tiles in the bathroom and the claw foot tub. The bedrooms are rather modern and unexceptional. I point out Adam's room and both women peek their heads in to see the room.
"He made his bed!" Caroline exclaims with surprise.
"No, um, I make up Adam's bed every morning," I say blushing lightly. I typically try not to think about Adam and bed in the same sentence if I can help it.
Caroline laughs. "No wonder he wants to stay here. You're treating him like a king."
My blush deepens. "Just doing my job," I insist.
"So where is the spoiled boy, anyway?" Bianca asks.
We begin walking down the stairs again. "Adam is still at Dr. Brickman's office. He usually gets here just before dinnertime."
"Do you wear that apron when you serve dinner?" asks Bianca jokingly. "I bet he'd like that."
"Bianca!"
"What? I'm just wondering what goes on here between you two. Adam insists you're just friends."
"We are," I agree quickly. "He was starting to go stir crazy the first couple weeks before his medical license arrived. We've become good friends."
Caroline and Bianca give each other a meaningful look and I take the opportunity to dart around the corner into the kitchen. The clock alerts me that it's time to pick up the kids by cooing loud and proud five times in a row.
"I need to pick up my children. Would you like to stay until Adam returns? He should be here within a half hour or so."
Caroline smiles at me. "Yes, thank you. We'll make ourselves at home."
"Okay, be back soon." I grab my keys and wave as I leave the Brickman's alone in the B&B.
As I expected, Gabby is mad I didn't pick her up until 5:15. She even makes a point to show me how there's only one other boy in her class left waiting for his parent. I never get a thank you when I pick her up at two o'clock or three thirty as I usually do, but if I'm late, boy do I hear about it. Tyler doesn't care about the time, he likes playing with Aiden and the other kids, and he doesn't stop singing the new song he learned the entire ride back.
When we pull into my parking space at Thatcher's I notice Adam's Lexus is back and my stomach starts doing little flips in anticipation. The kids run into the living room before I can warn them to be polite to Adam's family. Gabby stops short when she sees two strange ladies on her couch.
"Who are you?" she asks curiously.
I can hear Bianca's reply as I enter the house a few steps behind the kids. "My name is Bianca, Adam's sister. Are you Gabrielle?"
"Yeah. You're pretty. Wanna play Barbie with me?"
I laugh under my breath and hurry into the kitchen to get dinner finished by six. The shower is running upstairs so Adam must have asked his mother and sister in-law to wait a few more moments for him. Adam always likes to clean up and change his clothes after a day at the office. He says he feels like there are germs all over him after being coughed and sneezed on all day.
Bianca indulges Gabby in some Barbie time and I don't even try to intervene. If she wants to have a baby it might be helpful to know what she's getting herself into. Tyler turns on the TV and after a few min
utes Caroline excuses herself from the room to come help me with dinner. Her presence is more intimidating than helpful but I would never turn her away. Caroline is in the middle of folding my gravy into the linguine noodles when she says something shocking.
"Do you mind if I set Adam up on a blind date?"
I glare at her, wide eyed. "Why? I mean, why would I mind?"
Caroline shrugs. "You two seem close, I was just checking. One of my friend's in Savannah has a niece about Adam's age. I don't want him to get wrapped up in the construction project or his job. He can get like that, obsessed with one thing, be it school, or work... or a girlfriend. I think it would be good for him to meet people since he's new here."
I can't really argue with that. The only friend Adam truly has here is me. He's worked long days all week but I assume it was because Gregory needed the help. I don't particularly mind the idea of him becoming preoccupied with me, but the other things Caroline mentioned bothers me a little. I wonder if she meant Lindsey when she mentioned Adam being obsessed with a girl?
"I don't mind," I finally say. What other choice do I have? I'm not ready to tell Adam I want to be his girlfriend; so I can't exactly stake my claim on him. Besides, Adam will just tell his mother no. Right?
Speaking of the Adonis, Adam materializes in the entrance to the kitchen. "Hey, mom. Thanks for waiting. Hi Amanda."
My conversation with Caroline has my nerves frazzled and I just want to focus on my food preparation. If I turn around and catch a glimpse of those sparkling green eyes I might fall apart.
"Hi, Adam," I call over my shoulder and make like I'm really busy with the pork roast in front of me.
Caroline finishes with the serving bowl of noodles, adds a large silver spoon, and walks it into the dining room. I think she's trying to get Adam to follow her, which he does.
"So what did you want to talk to me about, Mom?" I hear him ask her over the dining room table.
"Do you remember my friend Maggie? She has that boutique in Savannah?"
"Um, maybe? Why?"
Caroline's voice drops a little and I have to strain to hear her next words. "I promised her you would take her niece out for dinner tomorrow night. Your father already told me it's your day off, and you need to get out of this house so you can meet a nice girl."
"Mom, no," Adam says equally softly.
"Emily's a very lovely girl, Adam," she replies firmly. It's a tone of voice meant to assert superiority. "She's twenty six, blonde hair, and lives in a little bungalow a few blocks from the river. Very nice house. She's a masseuse."
Adam groans. I grab my platter of pork and cranberry apple sauce holding my head up high as I walk it into the dining room.
"I asked you not to set me up with anyone. I can meet women on my own." His eyes meet mine briefly as I set the platter onto the table with a thud.
"Oops. Forgot the vegetables," I squeak awkwardly and hurry back to the kitchen.
"It's time to get over what happened with Lindsey; you said you've moved on. It's just one dinner. And I already told her yes, so don't embarrass me. Here's Emily's phone number to confirm a time."
Just then, Julie and Matthew come in from the back door, their faces flushed and smiling. They look like they were either out for a long hike through the forest or coming up for air from an extended make out session on the back porch. My money's on the latter. Julie comes into the kitchen to wash her hands for dinner and their sudden appearance distracts me from Adam's conversation with his mother. By the time I make it back into the dining room it's all over. And I have no idea what's been decided.
"Are you and Bianca staying for dinner?" I ask invitingly. "There's enough for two more. I'm taking the kids home, so please stay and keep Adam company."
Adam coughs uncomfortably while Julie and Matthew take their seats at the table oblivious to the tension brewing between Adam and me. He knows I overheard most of that conversation. I honestly can't imagine Adam agreeing to a blind date but Caroline didn't seem like she would take no for an answer. And their discussion has ended much too quickly for Adam to have convinced her he wasn't going to take the blonde masseur out tomorrow night. In fact, Caroline looks more than happy as she agrees to stay for dinner and compliments everything I've laid out on the table.
"This all smells just wonderful, Amanda! Bianca, come join us!"
Bianca comes in to join the group and I retreat to the living room to gather my children. I hadn't planned on taking the kids home until after dinner. I don't even have anything defrosted at home to feed them, but I suddenly feel claustrophobic with all these people and want to escape to my own comfortable surroundings. I know I won't have another opportunity to speak with Adam alone this evening. By the time Caroline and Bianca leave I'll have to get Tyler and Gabby home anyway. I'll have to wait until later to talk to Adam.
"You're leaving now?" Adam asks as I walk past the dining room towards the front door.
"Yes. I need to take care of the kids. Call me later, you know, if there's anything you need." I say it in that professional way; like I want to make sure his needs are met before ending my workday. Adam looks sad and his eyebrows crinkle together.
"He won't call you, Amanda. Go enjoy your evening. If Adam needs his undershirts ironed it can wait until tomorrow," Bianca says playfully.
He shoots her a dirty look from across the table. I don't know if Bianca is teasing Adam with Andrew's claim about his laundry preferences or if she knows from her own intimate experience that it's true that he irons his undershirts. I don't want to know. After having been forced to think about Adam with Bianca, Lindsey, and Emily in less than an hour I've had enough for one evening.
"Goodnight everyone. Enjoy," I say to the room and then turn my back on them.
At home I feed the kids frozen pizza, give them their baths, and put them to bed by eight thirty. I imagine the Brickman's must have gone home for the evening by the time I crawl into bed. Will Adam call to explain the awkward situation his mother put him in tonight; to tell me there's nothing to worry about?
The local news attempts to keep me awake for an hour after I get into bed but Adam doesn't call and I fall asleep with the TV on and my cell phone in hand.
Chapter Nineteen: Nervous Speculation
"It sounds like you missed the turnoff, Mr. Stevens. Yes, sometimes the GPS has difficulty finding this address. Just turn around on that road and make your way back to the highway. When you see the yellow farmhouse on your left you're almost there. Take the next turnoff on the right and it will lead you straight into town. Yep. Okay, see you soon. Bye."
I exhale long and slow as it's already been a stressful day. I've rushed around all morning in order to get Mr. Steven's and Mr. Olwen's rooms ready and now I've been twiddling my thumbs for over an hour because they got lost.
Worse yet, Adam's been gone all day and I haven't heard a word from him since I left him eating dinner with his family and the honeymooners last night. I thought for sure that by now he'd have given me some assurance that I have nothing to worry about with that blind date his mother tried to set him up on. Maybe he thought there was nothing to say because he would never go out with another woman while seeing me. Or maybe he felt like he owed me no explanation because we aren't technically together. I don't know what to think at this point, but I've spent all day going over it in my head. Cooking and cleaning leaves a lot of quiet time to think. So like I said, it's been a stressful day.
After I'd woken up this morning to find no call had come in from him during the night I realized just how few times Adam and I have really ever spoken on the phone. I see him here almost every day and besides a few occasions we haven't had much use for the phone. But that's no excuse. He knew I'd overheard his mother mention the date with Emily. He should have called if he knew he was leaving so early this morning that we wouldn't see each other. I expected to at least find a note from him. I was very disappointed to get neither.
I heard Caroline say that today was Adam's day off
from the office. So where is he? It's almost three o'clock. I don't want to call him because every time I imagine myself asking about the blind date I sound like a jealous girlfriend. And I have no right to try and stake a claim on him. I'm the one who has insisted we remain casual until further notice. The only explanation I can come up with is that Adam put his foot down and told Caroline no right there in Thatcher's dining room last night. Maybe he assumed I heard him refuse the blind date? Unfortunately, the sudden appearance of Julie and Matthew had distracted me. I'm hoping that I'm right about the misunderstanding, but the suspense is starting to eat me alive.
"Are you Amanda Sommerer?"
I look up, surprised to find I'm no longer alone in the house. I was so lost in thought I hadn't even heard the front door open.
"Yes. Hello. Mr. Stevens and Mr. Olwen?" I ask in greeting.
"You can call me Steve. Nice to meet you," one of the men says and reaches out to shake my hand.
"Steve Stevens?"
The tall, slightly overweight man chuckles. "No, Steve Olwen. And this is my colleague, Josh Stevens."
I blush a brilliant shade of red while my eyes shift to the other man. He is shorter but has a more muscular build and appears at least ten years younger than the other. "I'm so sorry. It's a pleasure to meet you both."
"We apologize for running late. That rental car has a terrible GPS system."
"Don't worry about it at all. I have your rooms ready, if you'll just sign in here," I say leading them over to the guestbook. "I'll have dinner ready by six o'clock. There are baskets in the bedroom closets for laundry and linen bags on hangers for anything you need dry-cleaned. Breakfast is always ready by eight o'clock and lunches are served at noon."
I offer each man one of my hand drawn maps of the town and walk them upstairs to their rooms. Steven and Josh both say they'd love to take a shower and just relax a bit before dinner. Before I leave them, I inform the businessmen about a few other housekeeping tips. After John Lambert and his fishermen buddies left me such a mess to clean up I've decided to be a little stricter about cleanliness and inform them I'll be by each day to make beds, do laundry, and tidy up. They both thank me for my hospitality and I excuse myself back to the kitchen.