“Okay, Triss, what’s bothering you?
“Nothing.”
“I thought we’d sorted all this out. We’re not going to get anywhere if you can’t be honest with me.”
She was silent for so long I feared I was going to have to take her straight home and administer another thrashing.
Suddenly she started. “Last night… did you… with both of them?”
I assumed she was asking if I’d made love with both Lorca and Jarmasin. “Yes.”
“And did they… I mean… with each other?”
“As it happens, yes. Both of them are bi-sexual.”
She flushed and looked out of the window. She was having trouble articulating what was bothering her. I had an inkling and, in the interests of finishing the conversation sometime today, decided to prompt her.
“You’re worried I’ll expect the same from you?” She nodded. “And you’re not that way inclined.”
“No. It’s…”
“No, it’s not. There’s nothing depraved, immoral or disgusting about two women making love. Come to that, there’s nothing depraved, immoral or disgusting about two men making love either.”
“Do you… like men?”
“No, I don’t. I’m distinctly heterosexual. I’m also a typically hypocritical male who finds the idea of beautiful women making love a turn-on.”
“Oh. I’m confused.”
“I can see that. What about, exactly?”
“You. Me. Everything.”
“Triss, you come from a society which has a strict moral code. Is that right?”
“I suppose so. I’ve never thought about it as strict before.”
“I mean you were brought up believing that there’s a right way to behave, a right way to think. There’s nothing wrong with that.” She gave me a surprised glance. “Everybody needs a moral code, a belief that some things are right and some are wrong. I have strong beliefs. It’s them that keep me fighting the Lottery Commission. Now the difference between your beliefs and mine is that I truly believe mine, you don’t.”
“That's not true,” she protested. “I have very strong beliefs.”
“You do, but they’re not really yours. Your beliefs were imposed on you. When you were young, your parents and your teachers told you some things were right and some were wrong, didn’t they? Okay, did you ever, or were you allowed to, stop and say, ‘wait a minute. Why is this right and that wrong?’.”
“No. That sort of thing wasn't done. Why should I ask question? Things are as they are.”
“You believe that two people of the same sex making love is wrong. I ask you; why is it wrong?”
“Well… because it is.”
I shook my head. “That’s not an answer. Look, I don’t care whether you think it’s wrong or not, just so long as you know why you think it’s wrong. ‘God says so’, is an answer of sorts. ‘It’s anti-survival as same-sex lovers can’t breed’, is a better one. ‘It’s not aesthetically pleasing’, is another. So I’ll ask you again; why is it wrong?”
She was looking most uncomfortable. “I don’t know.”
I squeezed her hand. “A good answer.”
“How can it be good?”
“Because it’s the first step towards working out why you do believe it or discarding that belief. You believe in honesty and truth and justice. I know you believe in them very deeply or you wouldn’t hold Paragonimffet in such high esteem. I don’t want you to tell me, but I’d like you to think about why you believe in them. I believe in them too and I’ll tell you why. People who are dishonest, untruthful and unjust don’t care about others. The see other beings as inferior and, consequently, have no qualms about abusing, hurting or even killing them. Now here’s the contradictory bit. While I believe in these things I know that others don’t, and I know that those that don’t will try to hurt me so I have no qualms at all in being as dishonest and untruthful to them as they are to me. Is that confusing?”
She managed a grin. “Very.”
“This is getting very heavy and I’m pushing you hard. I’m doing it because I know you’re intelligent and I like you very much and you need to learn to cope with the big, bad galaxy without getting hurt or swamped by it. You need to keep your standards while accepting that others have different ones and, as long as their standards don’t hurt you, it’s none of your business what they do. Take bi-sexuality. You’re not bi-sexual; Lorca is. Not a problem. If Lorca propositions you, you tell her politely that it’s not your thing, thank you. If she tries to push you…” I grinned, “…you could always break her arm.”
She giggled. “I don’t think I’d want to do that. You never know, I might just take her offer up.”
“There. Now you’re beginning to think for yourself. You might take her up on her offer just to find out what it’s like and find you don’t like it at all. Women just don’t turn you on. Next time someone asks you can firmly tell them no. Been there, tried that, didn’t like it.”
“So I should try everything at least once?”
“That’s up to you. You might want to draw a line at murder or suicide and that sort of thing, but it’s your choice. It’s your life and only you can decide what you want to do with it.”
She was nodding. “I think I see what you’re getting at. If someone suggests something that I’ve been brought up to believe is wrong, it doesn’t necessarily make them bad and it’s up to me to decide whether I want to do it or not.”
“Got it in one. The tricky bit is deciding whether the offer’s genuine. If someone asks you to take part in an orgy, are they someone who likes group sex or do they like abusing women. In many ways you have an advantage. Most of the time you’d be able to fight your way out of an unpleasant situation. Most people are not so fortunate.”
She thought about this then looked at me. “Is that why you’re… I was going to say afraid but I’ll change it to cautious about confrontations?”
It was uncanny. Had Lorca been talking to her? “Yes. I’m not physically aggressive and I have no training in self defence so I try to prevent or avoid that sort of situation. I should probably do something about it.”
“I could teach you.”
“I think I’d enjoy that,” I leered. “The idea of grappling with you is an attractive proposition.”
“You wouldn’t get to lay a finger on me,” she said primly.
I pulled a sad face. “Sadly, you’re right. Anyway, I appreciate the offer, but I won’t see you again once we’re back on Geretimal.”
“Oh, of course. I was forgetting that.”
“Are you feeling better?”
“Yes. Thank you.”
“No problem. Now we’d better be going if I’m to satisfy Julian’s lust for techno-toys.”
“You’re shopping for Julian?”
“Yes. Sad isn’t it. My life is controlled by a computer.”
“Idiot.”
We bought Julian all the toys the salesman could sell us. He thought we were insane, but the vision of all the commission he was earning kept him smiling and producing even more items to tempt us. It took three assistants to load the van.
“What’s Julian going to do with all this stuff?” Triss asked as we were driving away.
“It says it wants to study it. What it doesn’t need I can use. And that gives me an idea.”
The idea was to stock up on music, videos and computer games. While zooming round the galaxy was quick, it wasn't instantaneous and I was sure there would be long periods of boredom where a good movie would be just the thing to pass the time. Triss was both amazed and aghast at the media store.
“This is music?” she said, covering her ears against the drum’n’bass sound that was blasting from the speakers.
“Young people like it,” I said with a grin,
I didn’t buy any drum’n’bass, concentrating on classics from Frank Sinatra to Franz Ferdinand. I reckoned that anything that had stood the test of time was probably worth a listen to, even if it wasn't my favo
urite music just now. I raided the classical, jazz and folk sections, too, but drew the line at Country & Western. I do have some standards and there was always the horrifying possibility that Hermes might even enjoy it. I’m not a movie buff so my choices were less inclusive. I thought my ship-mates might be amused at our concepts of aliens, so I included ET, Star Trek and Star Wars as well as Lord of the Rings. I added a selection of classics by the Hollywood greats, some weepies and romantic comedies for the ladies and some Westerns for Hermes.
As we staggered back to the van I thought about books. I wasn't a great reader, but the time between the stars seemed like a good opportunity to remedy that. Triss was enthralled by the bookshop. She found the sports section and dumped about a dozen books on martial arts into my arms.
“I thought you knew all about this stuff,” I said.
“There’s always more to learn,” she said smugly.
“But you can’t read English.”
“You can teach me. Besides, they have lots of pictures.”
I wondered how I could possibly manage to teach her English in two days, but wisely kept my mouth shut. However, it did remind me that I wanted to buy a table tennis table so I added an instruction manual to the pile. I made a mental note to buy a table tomorrow if I could remember where I’d seen the shop that sold them.
By the time we’d finished, the van was rather full and we were running late. I contacted Fiona and said we’d meet her at the solicitor’s. We lunched in Mickey D’s. Triss was singularly unimpressed, and even less so when I said they were the single most successful food franchise on the planet.
We were just leaving when the vet rang. He had some of the test results back and wanted to speak to me. I didn’t need to hear his grave tone of voice to know the news was not good.
“The vet,” I said to Triss’s enquiring look. “He wants to see me. That means bad news.” I sighed. “I have this feeling I won’t see the cats again.”
To my surprise, she hugged me tightly. “I’m sorry. I know they meant a lot to you.”
“It’s daft to be so attached to two small animals. They’re just cats and I can get more tomorrow, but I’ve had them since they were kittens and I suppose I’ve become used to them. They’ve been a part of my life for seven years.”
“I still don’t understand how you can have feelings for them,” she said softly. “But…” she searched for the right words, “…it’s clear that you do and you feel their pain and so I feel for you. Does that make sense?”
“It does and I thank you for it. In situations like this it’s not sympathy that’s important, it’s… understanding. I’m getting maudlin. Perhaps the news won’t be as bad as I fear. Let’s go meet the lawyer.”
The solicitor was the one who handled Fiona’s divorce and the two knew each other quite well. She listened carefully as I explained the situation and assured me there would be no problem assigning Fiona power of attorney.
“I should have the papers ready next week,” she said. “I’ll post them out for you to sign.”
Next week was no good at all and I started to sink into despondency when the conversation with Lorca came into my head.
“Oh? It’s a complicated process, then?”
“No. Very simple, actually.”
“Good. We’ll be back tomorrow to sign the papers.”
“Tomorrow? I can’t have things ready for tomorrow.”
I stood and pulled out my chequebook. “If you’d like to tell me your consultation fee, we’ll be on our way.”
“What…? Why…?”
“I’ve already explained my situation. I know you and Fiona are friends but, as you can’t do anything till next week, we’ll just have to go elsewhere. There’s hundreds of solicitors in town. I’m sure one of them will oblige.”
She opened and closed her mouth a few times. The idea that a client would dare to question her procedures was unprecedented. I waited with a patient smile on my face.
“I could maybe do the day after,” she said eventually.
“Sorry. It has to be tomorrow. Tell you what. I realise this is going to put you out a bit so I’ll add fifteen percent to your fee as a sort of early completion bonus.”
“Well… I suppose… But after four, mind. Probably nearer five.”
“We’ll be here at five.”
“You realise it won’t take effect until it’s registered with the Public Guardian’s office.”
“Is that likely to be a problem?”
“No.”
“Will I have to do anything?”
“No. I raise the matter only because you seem to be in a hurry.”
I grinned. “Oh, I’m not in a hurry. It’s just that I’ll be away the day after tomorrow and will not be contactable. I thought I’d explained that.”
“You did, yes.”
“Good. So, to be clear, I need to sign some papers which then need to be registered. The power of attorney won’t take effect until the registration’s complete, but that’s a rubber-stamping exercise and I won’t be needed for it.”
“That is correct.”
“Then there’s no problem. It’ll take Fiona some time to make sense of my finances anyway. Thanks for your help. We’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Er, yes. Certainly.”
I shook her hand vigorously and led an astonished Fiona and an amused Triss out into the street.
“Crawford, what on Earth…? Fiona said. “You bulldozed her into that.”
I grinned. “Lots of practice. She was much easier than Chairman of the Commission.”
“But… she’s a lawyer. You don’t do things like that.”
“She’s a lawyer so she’s superior to the mere mortals that are her clients. Lawyering is a very difficult and complex business and lawyers are incredibly busy people. It’s very important the client understands what a favour they’re doing by taking your business. Do you know what she’d do? On Monday she’d send an e-mail to her secretary asking her to dig out the Power of Attorney template, remove paragraphs 3 and 7, add standard paragraphs 14 and 32 and make it out in our names. Her secretary, in between polishing her nails, would do it and put it in her boss’s in-tray on Monday evening. On Tuesday, if she had nothing better to do, your solicitor friend would check it over and send it back to her secretary for second class post. The secretary would deal with it on Wednesday, put it in the mail that evening and it would maybe be delivered on Friday. Even if we signed it immediately and delivered it back by hand, it wouldn’t be dealt with till the following Monday. So the best part of a fortnight is wasted simply because it’s not done to do things quickly. She knew damn well she could have it ready for tomorrow, but then we’d see that the lawyer business was easy. That’s why she haggled; to save face. If she wanted she could have it ready by ten, but she insisted on us waiting until five. You notice she was quite happy with a bribe, though.”
“You didn’t bribe her.”
”No? Okay, I offered her an incentive. Actually I didn’t need to, but it helped her save face again. Now she has a justification for working at a real world pace rather than a lawyer’s pace. Whatever euphemism you use, it’s still a bribe.”
“I don’t understand you.”
“It’s amazing how focused you become when your life is in danger.”
“That’s true,” Triss said.
“I assume, from the tone and the nod, that she’s agreeing with you,” Fiona said.
“She is. Now, I need to get to the vet’s. Fiona, can you take Triss with you?”
“If she doesn’t mind doing more shopping.”
“More shopping? What are you buying now?”
“Not me. Lorca. And it’s a secret.”
“Ah, well. It’s only money, I suppose.”
“What do you mean ‘only money’? You’re a Scot, aren’t you?”
The ladies pecked me on the cheek and departed. I made my way reluctantly to the vet’s.
“Mr MacAdam, come in. I have some of the
test results from your cats.”
“Not good news, I presume.”
“I’m afraid it’s not. The tests are confirming what I suspected when you first brought them in. Now, remind me, you were out of the country for three weeks?”
“Thereabouts, yes.”
“And during that time the cats had no natural food at all?”
“None.”
“I believe you mentioned reconstituted meat.”
“I did.”
Why was he dragging this out?
“Did you eat the same meat?”
“Virtually, yes. The meals were all reconstituted, I’ve no idea how. Many of them were quite heavily spiced so I asked if plain boiled meat or fish could be provided. It was mostly chicken or tuna.”
“Hmm. You may wish to get a check-up yourself. Just a precaution, you understand, but the food you’ve been eating was lacking in several important trace elements which is the cause of your cats’ distress. It is possible it was also lacking elements that could be detrimental to your health, too.”
“I see. Thank you. I’ll bear that in mind.”
“Now, as to, ah, Ziggy and Stardust, they’re suffering from the lack of several elements vital to their health. The most significant one is an amino acid called taurine, but they are also deficient in arachidonic acid, vitamins A and B12 and niacin. Unlike humans, cats are unable to synthesise these. They obtain them from their food.” He looked thoughtful. “It is possible that, being predators and meat being an excellent source, cats had no need to evolve the ability to synthesise them. An interesting speculation.
“As I say, cats obtain these elements from their food. Meat is an excellent source, raw meat in particular. Plants are almost entirely lacking. I suspect the reconstituted food you have been eating is plant based?”
“It’s possible. I never asked.”
“Quite so. No reason you should. Now, in the long term, a continuing deficiency of any one of these would have a serious detrimental effect on a cat’s health. One would not, normally, expect much degradation after just three weeks. In addition, under normal conditions, a cat would start hunting small rodents and birds even if, previously, they had shown no signs of being a hunter. Their natural instincts would kick in, so to speak. Additionally, the alert owner would become aware that the animal was poorly and seek veterinary advice. I appreciate, in your peculiar circumstances, this was not possible. In addition to which, the symptoms appear to have developed unusually rapidly. This may be because of the combination of the missing elements, or it may be due to other causes.”
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